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Can You Live In Ur Father In Law's House????? - Family - Nairaland

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Can You Live In Ur Father In Law's House????? by positiveb: 5:37pm On Apr 19, 2012
Transferred to PH where my father in law who reside in Abuja has a vacant apartment.He suggested I stay in the house with my family pending when I secure my own accommodation.What do you suggest?
Is it proper? Your comments will be appreciated.
Re: Can You Live In Ur Father In Law's House????? by Geomac: 6:00pm On Apr 19, 2012
Yes, I can
Re: Can You Live In Ur Father In Law's House????? by knowledge4(m): 6:57pm On Apr 19, 2012
If it will be temporary,Ok no problem with that.
Re: Can You Live In Ur Father In Law's House????? by ng4am(f): 8:23pm On Apr 19, 2012
Since its temporary no problem stay but pls don't over stay, find our own apartment ASAP, to maintain ur dignity.
Re: Can You Live In Ur Father In Law's House????? by moremi2008(m): 8:29pm On Apr 19, 2012
A temporary stay in fine but I know my Naija people well: they lose all shame and dignity when they find awoof benefits. If you're a man with any pride and decency, you will make your stay in his house truly temporary. If you decide to stay in the house for longer than a few weeks (3mths at the very, VERY maximum), you will be opening up your marriage to undue influence and a whole lot of drama! Remember, the key word here is TEMPORARY!!!

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Re: Can You Live In Ur Father In Law's House????? by Outstrip(f): 8:44pm On Apr 19, 2012
Make it temporary. Don't get comfortable because tomorrow you will be reminded how you stayed in their house so now you owe them your life. Just be appreciative but don't get comfortable
Re: Can You Live In Ur Father In Law's House????? by positiveb: 10:13pm On Apr 19, 2012
I appreciate all your responses. Thanks
Re: Can You Live In Ur Father In Law's House????? by blank(f): 9:50am On Apr 20, 2012
Is the house for rent? Why not rent it from him and stay comfortably with your family. At least, u know the landlord and you will be bringing in business for him instead of giving the money to an outsider. That's my opinion o.
Re: Can You Live In Ur Father In Law's House????? by positiveb: 1:12pm On Apr 20, 2012
The apartment is for rent.I brought up issue of paying for the rent but he refused.he said I shld rather think of using the rent to start my own building.
Re: Can You Live In Ur Father In Law's House????? by blank(f): 2:14pm On Apr 20, 2012
Depends on the kind of person ur FIL is, if he is not the type to disturb u then you can take his advice! He seems like a very decent guy that has his daughter's interest at heart.

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Re: Can You Live In Ur Father In Law's House????? by orekinky: 2:18pm On Apr 20, 2012
positiveb: The apartment is for rent.I brought up issue of paying for the rent but he refused.he said I shld rather think of using the rent to start my own building.
. The inlaw in question is a nice person, he has foreseen so many things, u are just growing up, stay there, help take care of the house, alongside secure ur land and start asap still make good use of the opportunity. opportunity comes but once, its now depends on how you use it.

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Re: Can You Live In Ur Father In Law's House????? by maclatunji: 3:46pm On Apr 20, 2012
positiveb: The apartment is for rent.I brought up issue of paying for the rent but he refused.he said I shld rather think of using the rent to start my own building.

You have an offer of help and the person has given you the reason for his offering you help, what else are you looking for? Start building that house ASAP! tongue

The best way a responsible father should help his married daughter is to pass it through her husband which he is doing. If you now want to allow pride to spoil the equation (na you sabi tongue ).

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Re: Can You Live In Ur Father In Law's House????? by denony(m): 3:56pm On Apr 20, 2012
For me it's No-No
I will not try such, I love to maintain my dignity to the core

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Re: Can You Live In Ur Father In Law's House????? by maclatunji: 4:08pm On Apr 20, 2012
denony: For me it's No-No
I will not try such, I love to maintain my dignity to the core

Translation: I am a very proud man and will always allow my pride come before common sense.

7 Likes

Re: Can You Live In Ur Father In Law's House????? by Nobody: 4:34pm On Apr 20, 2012
No shame there. Thank God u have the mny to foot the rent so he knws u ain't hungry. Make use of the opportunity and start building. No dulling.
Re: Can You Live In Ur Father In Law's House????? by kooto(m): 4:46pm On Apr 20, 2012
If he is the domineering type I will advice please don't stay long in the house, if he is the opposite fine but still don't stay long there; why? it might suprise you that your wife may begin to have this bossy attitude afteral you are living in her father's house, which could bring problem between both of you; only very few women can resist been bossy when they are at advantage.it's bitter but it remains the truth because as a councellor I have seen many.
Re: Can You Live In Ur Father In Law's House????? by chucky234(m): 4:48pm On Apr 20, 2012
People are talking of dignity and pride,African mentality.
Guy park your family into the house and settle down as that will afford you the opportunity to save enough for your own apartment and other pressing needs but don't wait until he ask you to park out of the house before you do. Stay there for few months why you take your time to save enough money for your rent and business,just be sensible about it that way your dignity will remain intact.
Don't make the mistake of informing him before getting an apartment,get the apartment first then inform and thank him for his generousity towards your family. He will respect you and hold you in high esteem for the rest of his life,
What are you still waiting for,go put that house in order and park your family in before the man change his mind, hahahah just kidding

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Re: Can You Live In Ur Father In Law's House????? by chucky234(m): 4:51pm On Apr 20, 2012
saliubello: Hello Parents, if you are thinking of buying land to build or a house at affordable price without running into 'omo onile' problems. Most especially Lagos Mainland(Magodo/Isheri Axis) or Mowe/Ofada for future development/investment, send me an email, saliubello2003@yahoo.com, let me know your budget and interest. Our Company has a complete package that carters for you, with flexible payment plan. 08020313251 Bello
Guy why you dey carry do nah, cos OP talk of house you don rush dey post advert for him thread.
Guy go open your own thread make you stop to distract people attention for this threa Oooooo

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Re: Can You Live In Ur Father In Law's House????? by Claracuzio: 6:56pm On Apr 20, 2012
Don't turn down the offer my brother, stay there for a while, if you must move ahead do so but at least accept the offer.
Or are u tring to say he can't help you if you are in need of help?
If you turn down the offer now, you never can tell when life will throw lemons at you,
These are the kind of people that will get you back on ur feet.
So swallow ur pride and stay put there for a while. No be u go be the first person to get moni!
Re: Can You Live In Ur Father In Law's House????? by gram: 7:48pm On Apr 20, 2012
@op. If the story is exactly the way you put it, then I think your father in-law is a very good man. He opened the front door for you, and made the back door accessible, in fact he left the fire escape intact, smiley He is only trying to help you without tampering with your dignity..in my opinion, take the house, and follow his advice. all d best!
Re: Can You Live In Ur Father In Law's House????? by emmatok(m): 8:25pm On Apr 20, 2012
positiveb: Transferred to PH where my father in law who reside in Abuja has a vacant apartment.He suggested I stay in the house with my family pending when I secure my own accommodation.What do you suggest?
Is it proper? Your comments will be appreciated.

Never temporary or permanent.

I no wan hear stories of how they(in-laws) accommodate me bla bla bla ......
Re: Can You Live In Ur Father In Law's House????? by seal777(m): 8:26pm On Apr 20, 2012
Does your father in law has a matured daughter of a marriageable age?, i would love to have him as a father inlaw.

Pack into the apartment on the condition that you will get a land and start building your own house as suggested but always be watchful ( not suspicious ) as a man.

Please remember that natural issues will come up between yourself and your wife, dont be too forward in interpreting it in line of the offer your father in law extended to you, PLEASE.

Dont forget to invite us to your house warming in the nearest future.

I wish you the best in your marriage and quest to be a landlord very soon.

4 Likes

Re: Can You Live In Ur Father In Law's House????? by seal777(m): 8:30pm On Apr 20, 2012
emmatok:

Never temporary or permanent.

I no wan hear stories of how they(in-laws) accommodate me bla bla bla ......


That would only happen if you pack in, sleep and start snoring as if you won a lottery.

If you get a land as fast as you can and start your own building, be a good son in law you have always been, nothing of such would come up.

1 Like

Re: Can You Live In Ur Father In Law's House????? by emmatok(m): 9:14pm On Apr 20, 2012
seal777:


That would only happen if you pack in, sleep and start snoring as if you won a lottery.

If you get a land as fast as you can and start your own building, be a good son in law you have always been, nothing of such would come up.

NAA,

They might say it to your face now.

But one-day you try show them you are a Man, your wife will remind you how her family helped you.
Re: Can You Live In Ur Father In Law's House????? by ekitikan(m): 9:23pm On Apr 20, 2012
it is not proper for you to stay more than temporarily,today you are sweet with the old boy (your fada inlaw) pls remember things can change......nuffing as constant as change.....
take the offer but for your sake and posterity,make it as short as possible.there is a proverb in yoruba land for someone that lives in his inlaws house"a ji sanmi,o sun latan fi aso werepe bo ra" (few yorubas can actually decipher this proverb, but i will interprete). he is likened to a man that sleeps on a dung heap and eats faeces as his breakfast(constantly) and he covers himself with a blanket that itch him continously. in yoruba land if such a man dies in that house his relations would not take his dead body through the door,rather he would be passed through the window and his corpse or rather carcass would be buried in tbe dung heap. our tradition frowns at such.....the black man is different from the european.
Re: Can You Live In Ur Father In Law's House????? by PHIPEX(m): 10:11pm On Apr 20, 2012
If your head is correct, few weeks may not be bad but don't become like someone I know who is about to spend a yr in his inlaw's house. Am even ashamed to say that I know him.

2 Likes

Re: Can You Live In Ur Father In Law's House????? by ifihearam: 8:43am On Apr 21, 2012
Guy don't acceot it one bit,tell ur inlaw u have seen a house of ur choice becos even ur wife will use it against u tomoro.
Re: Can You Live In Ur Father In Law's House????? by hollas2jnr(m): 11:16am On Apr 21, 2012
May your typical african mentality not make you later regret this opportunity... its comes but once. I'll rather pack in, plan building mine at a good pace, pack out and be appreciative as well. Infact, it doesn't call for a frontpage here in NL. Your FiL gives you an opportunity and you are already second-guessing him... Very bad!
Re: Can You Live In Ur Father In Law's House????? by hollas2jnr(m): 11:17am On Apr 21, 2012
maclatunji:

Translation: I am a very proud man and will always allow my pride come before common sense.

Not a good way to live life...
Re: Can You Live In Ur Father In Law's House????? by tasandra: 1:00pm On Apr 21, 2012
Abeg grab the offa jare ;Dmake u lv pride..dis kai help no dey come evry day.

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