please guys, how do i open a thread??

slimyem: He's my friend's fiance,and the only child to his mum,who will do anything for him.
He doesn't have a job but his mum wants him to get married.

His Mum loves my friend,gives her pocket money, buys her stuff,call her and do all other assumed responsibilities of the fiance asides intimacy.

When she sensed my friend wasn't comfortable coming to visit the guy in her house,she rented a 3-bedroom apartment for him and equipped it.She's responsible for EVERYTHING in the house, and even gives my girlfriend money to cook food for her son if she isn't able to send food stuff and ingredients down.

Whenever the guy is broke,he calls mummy and she responds.Though he says he's trying to make money but his avenues are not clear-cut.trying to land contracts and hanging around political god-fathers.

A date has being fixed for introductions and an assumed wedding date already.

What kind of a husband would he be because technically he's nothing without his mum?
My friend is worried and so am i for her.

definitely he will be a baby husband. No doubt abt that.

slimyem: hey mister,i'm not judging nothing from afar.
The lady in question is my best friend and more (no homo!)
I am privy to the genesis and exodus of the relationship.i know EVERYTHING or almost so just take my word for it!

Okay Miss!
So, can u tell ur BEST FRIEND to disembark cos the guy might not make a good husband, or just wanna know our will-not-be-applied point of views?
It will be much better if ur friend is reading this so as to know what she is into!
U mite know from Genesis to Revelation (Logo), but ur friend will surely know the guy better (Rhema)!
My point...its a probability of 50/50!

cindyrella: I know a guy like that, he is a lawyer but he has refused to do anything resonable with his life.
When ever he is broke, all he has to do is call his parents (expecially his mom) and they will send everything he needs..

Without been told i know the kind of husband he will be.. (the lazy type)
I just pity his future wife.

Does it mean everybody is the same?
Do u know the plan of the guy....change is constant!

slimyem: she has a job.not a very good one but sustainable.
Why doesn't he do the cooking?
Babe,we are talking about a typical Nigerian man here!

Hey! Whaddaya mean , I'll have you know I'm a better cook than a lot of ladies on this forum. But I wish I had a boxed up mum like this guy , just kidding , wouldn't change my mum for all the other mums on the planet .

Frankly speaking I wouldn't be surprised if his mum holds his willy for him when he's taking a pee ( like when we were kids ) or when he wants to insert it into the erm , erm . He needs to grow man balls and get something doing for himself.

ariyokunle: Slimyem i've followed ur post awhile on NL so i can atlist tel d way u reason to an extend-u ant d best to decide here but ur friend.Most response to ur post are ladies owing to d African setting of motherinlaw influnce in marriages:i for one wished i got such surport at dat age,i wld ve married and bet u dat wld ve only been an edge not because am lazy but just d situation.u see ur friend shld b mature enurf to tell if she's with a man or a boy.d mother migth undastd dat everyman needs some lifting at some point and been dat he's her only-it cld b as a boy or as a man,but first and formost is he capable to man his home?where money comes from(mother or not)doesnt mata;ve u not seen a man working to care for his parent and d parents stil take d decision of his home.if he's truely a man,a time wld come when his mum cant afford his taste in relation to his ego.

Thank u my brother!

fenando po: please guys, how do i open a thread??

Go to the section that is related to ur topic...click on it and scroll down a bit....u will see 'post new topics' by the RHS after d number of pages....hope it helps!

ayobase:

Thank u my brother!

of everything wey dm post for hia,na only nonsense you fit agree with?
Smh for you big time!

slimyem: of everything wey dm post for hia,na only nonsense you fit agree with?
Smh for you big time!

Lmao! Baba oloshi ni e o!

I cannot answer the question of what kind of husband the guy will make, but i can suggest a scheme that will cut that puppet from his mother's strings. Her meddlesome influence appears to be the chief cause of all the worry after all.

Now, you may think of the situation in this way:

Enormously wealthy mum; lazy, spoilt only son; desperate fiancée. [Feel free to replace 'desperate' with any euphemism of your choice].

There has been no mention of a dad, and for the sake of my scheme we shall assume that he is lounging six feet beneath.

This wickedly rich woman has got a kid who is apparently old enough for marriage, yet she still retains sufficient will-power to exert a domineering demeanour on both her child AND his fiancée; two fully grown adults. It would be safe therefore to place her age above fifty but below sixty-five. For very simple reasons too.

It is uncommon for a woman below fifty to have produced progeny that is fit for matrimony, especially when that offspring is male. It is also inconceiveable that a woman over sixty-five would wield such pronounced influence in any area of her SON's life other than mentioning her preferred colour of napkins.



Now the story makes it evident that our wealthy milf dotes on her son excessively. If she cares so much for her son now that she is alive, bet on the fact that she worries convulsively about what will become of him when she is gone to provide nourishment for the maggots.

She's a woman, and they're all good at worrying about such things. Plus the fact that she is overbearing as of nature means she will be extra-meticulous with her plans.

SO our ma'am wants to ensure that her baby is tucked in all nice and comfy before she kicks the bucket, the obvious answer to that problem is in showering said lad with a generous allocation of cash and other lucrative assets...in a will.


I should mention, for clarity of intent, that a will usually doesn't come into effect until after the testator, in this case our beloveth milf, DIES.

This technicality is disturbing at first, but careful consideration would reveal how happy everyone would really be if said milf met with some fatal misfortune.

The exact nature of this misfortune being something to be determined by the imagination of the would-be couple.

I have a mind to furnish this distraught couple with further hints on how to approach the ultimate matter, but i'm wary of the line between the absurd ramblings of an idle nairalander and the cold calculations of an accessory.

Nickydrake: I cannot answer the question of what kind of husband the guy will make, but i can suggest a scheme that will cut that puppet from his mother's strings. Her meddlesome influence appears to be the chief cause of all the worry after all.

Now, you may think of the situation in this way:

Enormously wealthy mum; lazy, spoilt only son; desperate fiancée. [Feel free to replace 'desperate' with any euphemism of your choice].

There has been no mention of a dad, and for the sake of my scheme we shall assume that he is lounging six feet beneath.

This wickedly rich woman has got a kid who is apparently old enough for marriage, yet she still retains sufficient will-power to exert a domineering demeanour on both her child AND his fiancée; two fully grown adults. It would be safe therefore to place her age above fifty but below sixty-five. For very simple reasons too.

It is uncommon for a woman below fifty to have produced progeny that is fit for matrimony, especially when that offspring is male. It is also inconceiveable that a woman over sixty-five would wield such pronounced influence in any area of her SON's life other than mentioning her preferred colour of napkins.



Now the story makes it evident that our wealthy milf dotes on her son excessively. If she cares so much for her son now that she is alive, bet on the fact that she worries convulsively about what will become of him when she is gone to provide nourishment for the maggots.

She's a woman, and they're all good at worrying about such things. Plus the fact that she is overbearing as of nature means she will be extra-meticulous with her plans.

SO our ma'am wants to ensure that her baby is tucked in all nice and comfy before she kicks the bucket, the obvious answer to that problem is in showering said lad with a generous allocation of cash and other lucrative assets...in a will.


I should mention, for clarity of intent, that a will usually doesn't come into effect until after the testator, in this case our beloveth milf, DIES.

This technicality is disturbing at first, but careful consideration would reveal how happy everyone would really be if said milf met with some fatal misfortune.

The exact nature of this misfortune being something to be determined by the imagination of the would-be couple.

I have a mind to furnish this distraught couple with further hints on how to approach the ultimate matter, but i'm wary of the line between the absurd ramblings of an idle nairalander and the cold calculations of an accessory.

And your point is

slimyem: of everything wey dm post for hia,na only nonsense you fit agree with?
Smh for you big time!

Look at person wey dey shake head for somebody!
Why bringing this matter on here when u r already bent on ur own decision.
Gbogbo wa kan n ja ito lasan.
I asked u a question d other time...go answer am!
Its a shame that ur telescope cant see the nearest object.
I tot I had a good perception about you!
Ko osi wole jare!

slimyem: No.its NOT me!
Thanks for your opinion!

Sharrapp there....listen to correction!

He has a source of income at least. If it was a woman (daddy's girl) who solely depended on her dad for finance, you wouldn't complain.

apocalypse:

And your point is

If you ain't figured it out by now, it is unlikely that further explanation will be of any help.

Nickydrake: I cannot answer the question of what kind of husband the guy will make, but i can suggest a scheme that will cut that puppet from his mother's strings. Her meddlesome influence appears to be the chief cause of all the worry after all.

Now, you may think of the situation in this way:

Enormously wealthy mum; lazy, spoilt only son; desperate fiancée. [Feel free to replace 'desperate' with any euphemism of your choice].

There has been no mention of a dad, and for the sake of my scheme we shall assume that he is lounging six feet beneath.

This wickedly rich woman has got a kid who is apparently old enough for marriage, yet she still retains sufficient will-power to exert a domineering demeanour on both her child AND his fiancée; two fully grown adults. It would be safe therefore to place her age above fifty but below sixty-five. For very simple reasons too.

It is uncommon for a woman below fifty to have produced progeny that is fit for matrimony, especially when that offspring is male. It is also inconceiveable that a woman over sixty-five would wield such pronounced influence in any area of her SON's life other than mentioning her preferred colour of napkins.



Now the story makes it evident that our wealthy milf dotes on her son excessively. If she cares so much for her son now that she is alive, bet on the fact that she worries convulsively about what will become of him when she is gone to provide nourishment for the maggots.

She's a woman, and they're all good at worrying about such things. Plus the fact that she is overbearing as of nature means she will be extra-meticulous with her plans.

SO our ma'am wants to ensure that her baby is tucked in all nice and comfy before she kicks the bucket, the obvious answer to that problem is in showering said lad with a generous allocation of cash and other lucrative assets...in a will.


I should mention, for clarity of intent, that a will usually doesn't come into effect until after the testator, in this case our beloveth milf, DIES.

This technicality is disturbing at first, but careful consideration would reveal how happy everyone would really be if said milf met with some fatal misfortune.

The exact nature of this misfortune being something to be determined by the imagination of the would-be couple.

I have a mind to furnish this distraught couple with further hints on how to approach the ultimate matter, but i'm wary of the line between the absurd ramblings of an idle nairalander and the cold calculations of an accessory.

I haven't laughed like this in a while; evil Sherlock Holmes to the rescue.

i used to believe this forum was a representation of the lifestyle/character/attitude of people in the real world out there, but now i accept this is just an avenue to express our hypocritical nature of ourselves, coming out to say somethings, claiming to stand for some principles while in life we do the opposite without blinking an eye,in this marriage issue loads has been said, if you are poor and your inlaw is funding most of your marriage na crime, if your spouse (female) funds it na crime, if na your mama na crime, the beauty of this world is in different diversities and the acceptance that what works for you does not work for me, and while we are all chasing success,the timeline of each individual is different.

i have seen people cursing guys taking roles in inlaws company on this forum, i have seen people cursing guys taking financial assistance from their inlaws to set up business on this forum, even those offered accomodation are abused as well, and i ask na everybody we dey this forum really built their success from scratch without assistance from woman, families? i 'm not ashamed to say it my mum gave me my first cash to start my business, i misused it in a bad business and after sometime that she watched me and saw things were different she gave me another one and today the business is growing gradually now, and through all this i had a girlfriend and did my introduction, and even gave my girlfriend a quarter to improve her own business. i was offered accomodation as well but as i live abroad i turned it down then.

now tell me i know loads of pple here in UK who have their accomodation sent to them by parents monthly even after studying, i know those who their parents gave houses to their son in laws after marriage, i know inlaws that were helped with jobs, infact i belong to a family where a firm owned by my uncle. a big advertising firm in lagos had about 3-4 inlaws working in there at some point, and right now cousins, and other family members still work or make their living through contracts and it is still one of the biggest firm in advertising in nigeria. i believe a 30yr old getting married and the wife have been talking and have plans towards their lifes and would not bring in his mum into my marriage and i believe the lady involved should have worked this out and believe that the funds coming from mum would make her husband stand at some point on his own, i appreciated all my mum did for me, i'm on my own now i also appreciated the fact that my girl didnt think like most on this thread hence would have worked away while i was figuring myself out. at the end of the day all this chicks here no go mind who put the money down when they see the guy growing a multi million business from what mama gave him and no go remember his many mistakes that the mum supported and provided more funds while trying to grow, but go still date am, na wa for naija and hypocrisy.

there are a thousand and one perspectives to ur friend's circumstance... she's not a toddler i believe, n should know what's best for her, she could take some time off so as to see things d way they REALLY are. she should pray about it too, if she believes.

manheem: i used to believe this forum was a representation of the lifestyle/character/attitude of people in the real world out there, but now i accept this is just an avenue to express our hypocritical nature of ourselves, coming out to say somethings, claiming to stand for some principles while in life we do the opposite without blinking an eye,in this marriage issue loads has been said, if you are poor and your inlaw is funding most of your marriage na crime, if your spouse (female) funds it na crime, if na your mama na crime, the beauty of this world is in different diversities and the acceptance that what works for you does not work for me, and while we are all chasing success,the timeline of each individual is different.

i have seen people cursing guys taking roles in inlaws company on this forum, i have seen people cursing guys taking financial assistance from their inlaws to set up business on this forum, even those offered accomodation are abused as well, and i ask na everybody we dey this forum really built their success from scratch without assistance from woman, families? i 'm not ashamed to say it my mum gave me my first cash to start my business, i misused it in a bad business and after sometime that she watched me and saw things were different she gave me another one and today the business is growing gradually now, and through all this i had a girlfriend and did my introduction, and even gave my girlfriend a quarter to improve her own business. i was offered accomodation as well but as i live abroad i turned it down then.

now tell me i know loads of pple here in UK who have their accomodation sent to them by parents monthly even after studying, i know those who their parents gave houses to their son in laws after marriage, i know inlaws that were helped with jobs, infact i belong to a family where a firm owned by my uncle. a big advertising firm in lagos had about 3-4 inlaws working in there at some point, and right now cousins, and other family members still work or make their living through contracts and it is still one of the biggest firm in advertising in nigeria. i believe a 30yr old getting married and the wife have been talking and have plans towards their lifes and would not bring in his mum into my marriage and i believe the lady involved should have worked this out and believe that the funds coming from mum would make her husband stand at some point on his own, i appreciated all my mum did for me, i'm on my own now i also appreciated the fact that my girl didnt think like most on this thread hence would have worked away while i was figuring myself out. at the end of the day all this chicks here no go mind who put the money down when they see the guy growing a multi million business from what mama gave him and no go remember his many mistakes that the mum supported and provided more funds while trying to grow, but go still date am, na wa for naija and hypocrisy.

i never even read dis post sef BUT GBAM.Abeg tell dem bad belle bitches.if na dangote pikin na dem for de tell d girl to ask for 25k ring.hunger no good o

slimyem: He's my friend's fiance,and the only child to his mum,who will do anything for him.
He doesn't have a job but his mum wants him to get married.

His Mum loves my friend,gives her pocket money, buys her stuff,call her and do all other assumed responsibilities of the fiance asides intimacy.

When she sensed my friend wasn't comfortable coming to visit the guy in her house,she rented a 3-bedroom apartment for him and equipped it.She's responsible for EVERYTHING in the house, and even gives my girlfriend money to cook food for her son if she isn't able to send food stuff and ingredients down.

Whenever the guy is broke,he calls mummy and she responds.Though he says he's trying to make money but his avenues are not clear-cut.trying to land contracts and hanging around political god-fathers.

A date has being fixed for introductions and an assumed wedding date already.

What kind of a husband would he be because technically he's nothing without his mum?
My friend is worried and so am i for her.

your friend should be ready to be the second wife at home, cos the mum is the head and first wife while your friend will be the second. She will tell him when to sleep with her, give her money, when to have baby etc
The bible say he who does not work should not eat. And God gave Adam a farm and animals to work on before He brought Eve his' wife. So, He expects us to work and provide for our family ourselves because he who does not fend for his' family is worst than an infidel.

If the girl is too myopic, shallow minded and blinded with greek gift from would-be mother inlaw; what of her parents? Her parent need to postpone the marriage stuff indefinately untill either the guy's mother empower the guy to start a business or buy a paying job for the lad. I can't understand how marriage will cross the mind of a jobless man. The guy is not even a huzzling type. So, if your girl friend needs a pad,she will call her mother inlaw. Marriage is a serious business. There is more to these that the mother inlaw is not telling you guy. Shine your eyes.

what i feel is dat d mum wants grandchildren,she's bored n will do anytin if her son impregnate a girl outside. ''she rented a 3bedroom 4dem'' dats lyk sayin my hse wnt mke u guys comfortable,go out n do ur tin. Tell ur frnd to relax, tink tins over let her not rush into marriage she'll regrate leta. Dnt b surprice dat he's mum is tellin him she wants her grandchildren by all means.

manheem: i used to believe this forum was a representation of the lifestyle/character/attitude of people in the real world out there, but now i accept this is just an avenue to express our hypocritical nature of ourselves, coming out to say somethings, claiming to stand for some principles while in life we do the opposite without blinking an eye,in this marriage issue loads has been said, if you are poor and your inlaw is funding most of your marriage na crime, if your spouse (female) funds it na crime, if na your mama na crime, the beauty of this world is in different diversities and the acceptance that what works for you does not work for me, and while we are all chasing success,the timeline of each individual is different.

i have seen people cursing guys taking roles in inlaws company on this forum, i have seen people cursing guys taking financial assistance from their inlaws to set up business on this forum, even those offered accomodation are abused as well, and i ask na everybody we dey this forum really built their success from scratch without assistance from woman, families? i 'm not ashamed to say it my mum gave me my first cash to start my business, i misused it in a bad business and after sometime that she watched me and saw things were different she gave me another one and today the business is growing gradually now, and through all this i had a girlfriend and did my introduction, and even gave my girlfriend a quarter to improve her own business. i was offered accomodation as well but as i live abroad i turned it down then.

now tell me i know loads of pple here in UK who have their accomodation sent to them by parents monthly even after studying, i know those who their parents gave houses to their son in laws after marriage, i know inlaws that were helped with jobs, infact i belong to a family where a firm owned by my uncle. a big advertising firm in lagos had about 3-4 inlaws working in there at some point, and right now cousins, and other family members still work or make their living through contracts and it is still one of the biggest firm in advertising in nigeria. i believe a 30yr old getting married and the wife have been talking and have plans towards their lifes and would not bring in his mum into my marriage and i believe the lady involved should have worked this out and believe that the funds coming from mum would make her husband stand at some point on his own, i appreciated all my mum did for me, i'm on my own now i also appreciated the fact that my girl didnt think like most on this thread hence would have worked away while i was figuring myself out. at the end of the day all this chicks here no go mind who put the money down when they see the guy growing a multi million business from what mama gave him and no go remember his many mistakes that the mum supported and provided more funds while trying to grow, but go still date am, na wa for naija and hypocrisy.

Best post so far.

@slimyem do you think Adenuga's son would be a bad/lazy husband?

manheem: i used to believe this forum was a representation of the lifestyle/character/attitude of people in the real world out there, but now i accept this is just an avenue to express our hypocritical nature of ourselves,

and that is all-

but you are right, if our mothers/fathers don't look after us who will. The question is if marriage is the right thing to be doing at this time?

@queensmith, yes you're right, and while i agree that is the most important question to be asked at this time, the question should be asked between the man and his girl, the answers should also be provided between the man and his girl, not his mother, or her family or her friends, while the friend could be privy into all going on in the relationship, i believe she wont be privy to some personal things except the girl getting married does not have a personal life at all, while many of us claim to be sufficient interms of finance before marriage , there are still loads of people getting one benefit or the other from parents if the finances is there.

i had a cousin who worked hard for over a yr before his marriage, but his accomodation and their first car was provided by his dad in his first yr of marriage, and he could channel his own funds into something else, maybe the guy in question is getting a huge break/loan from mama to grow whatever he is doing further we wont know, the only parallel we see is that he has no job , but getting married, in this same country guys earning a little above 50 thousand have wifes at home not to talk of someone who has a financial wall to rely on , he is even the only child, what if this marriage is an avenue to break the shackles of mama permannently and figure out what plans he can achieve himself?, the only thing i would be against is decision making from mama and trust me loads of married couple still run to parents for financial help and get to make the decisions in their marriage themselves.

The secret to all success is the same- patience, pratice and confidence ! Oh off thread , i hate to look like a noob, but what is imao ? Oh no i should have googled it ! My mind is playing tricks on me.

manheem: @queensmith, yes you're right, and while i agree that is the most important question to be asked at this time, the question should be asked between the man and his girl, the answers should also be provided between the man and his girl, not his mother, or her family or her friends, while the friend could be privy into all going on in the relationship, i believe she wont be privy to some personal things except the girl getting married does not have a personal life at all, while many of us claim to be sufficient interms of finance before marriage , there are still loads of people getting one benefit or the other from parents if the finances is there.

i had a cousin who worked hard for over a yr before his marriage, but his accomodation and their first car was provided by his dad in his first yr of marriage, and he could channel his own funds into something else, maybe the guy in question is getting a huge break/loan from mama to grow whatever he is doing further we wont know, the only parallel we see is that he has no job , but getting married, in this same country guys earning a little above 50 thousand have wifes at home not to talk of someone who has a financial wall to rely on , he is even the only child, what if this marriage is an avenue to break the shackles of mama permannently and figure out what plans he can achieve himself?, the only thing i would be against is decision making from mama and trust me loads of married couple still run to parents for financial help and get to make the decisions in their marriage themselves.

you make sense- i guess its all about how you look at it. it even makes sense that a such a guy will be Better off with the monetary support. its not all about suffering! lol

Nickydrake:


If you ain't figured it out by now, it is unlikely that further explanation will be of any help.

In simple English can you explain the solution you proffered in your post , while trying to be grandiloquent you got lost in verbiage.

Lmao! What a funny Post.

@yemi-slimyemi * dont u tink u shld not have use dat word"nonsense"; just curious. May b u didnt get my point.(MATURITY -THEY SAY IS ABILITY TO DELAY ANGER)