Phones / Re: Phone Engineers On Nairaland Willing To Assist You - Part II by babz21(m): 9:01am On Oct 14, 2022 |
Good morning everyone, pls hope you are all doing well. Pls I'm having a little issue with my phone (tecno spark 7), can't access internet connection on some apps like my mail, nairaland etc & I have data. Plz what could be the problem? 1 Like 1 Share |
Education / Re: National Open University Of Nigeria (NOUN) Students by babz21(m): 5:47pm On Oct 11, 2022 |
Enskynelson:
It's simple. Send the debit alert to support@remita.net With your details. If however your debit alert contains the RRR, send me a DM Thanks a lot. The debit alert receipt does have the RRR, I sent u a mail. |
Education / Re: National Open University Of Nigeria (NOUN) Students by babz21(m): 2:26pm On Oct 11, 2022 |
Hello everyone, plz I got into a problem while registering for NOUN online! After the undergraduate fee of #5188 was made with my debit card, the page failed to proceed, instead it showed me an error message. I didn't see the final form, and remita has debited my account. Please how do I fix this? |
Business / First Choice Telecoms Is A Scam by babz21(m): 12:40pm On Apr 07, 2022 |
They just scammed me of 1k airtime I sent them in exchange for Cash! Pls beware!
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Forum Games / Re: Only Genius Can Solve This by babz21(m): 8:22am On Oct 30, 2017 |
noeloge82: Hi everyone Let play this Game, look closely , how many girls exactly do u see I see 4 girls |
Forum Games / Re: Great Riddles That Will Make You Think Outside The Box by babz21(m): 7:42pm On Sep 16, 2017 |
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Family / Re: My Marriage - A Sinking Ship. by babz21(m): 6:32pm On Jul 17, 2017 |
Bluestreams: Profile: 10yrs old Nlander, Postgrad, 32yrs old, 2 yrs old in marriage with a 1yr old son.
Pls kindly read patiently and advice me if I am wrong and also what to do if my spouse is the problem. Thanks.
I got married as the first child out of two and my family (mother) really supported me financially. At this time, I didnt have any salary job neither do I have any contracts running as I do pest control and landscaping services and other small legal hustles. I met my wife who is a civil servant and we fell inlove and I never hid my financial or employment status from her. Shortly before my wedding (I was also job hunting for a better job) I got an interview in a top oil and gas firm in the country by insider recommendation, and being the only one invited I felt I've gotten it. My fiancé started telling her sibs that I'm already a staff which I frowned at because I've not received any appointment letter. This she was doing in "faith" anyway. Subsequently, I was never called for that job again and by this time we were already married. Prior to this time, I got a slightly less than 50k job in a bank and after a few months my fiancé pressed me to resign athough that job was stressful and in another state where I neither had family nor friends.
We got married then the issues began. I noticed my wife is the type of woman thats slow (I'll not use the word lazy). She cant keep up with my pace when we walk, she can't clean the house daily, she'll prefer I do the house chores while she watches tv and all. We were in honey moon so I didn't have a problem with that, and more over I enjoy such chores and I am a good cook. By this time her salary was dropping and we were living on it coupled with whatever income that comes from me from my business (my wife isn't stingy with her funds and neither am I).
Our problems started when she became pregnant just a months after wedding. She became super slow due to the preggy and I had to do like every every due to the initial sickness and all. Also, I noticed my wife doesn't know how to talk to people. She isnt rude or insolent but she can argue blindly and just keeps talking. She talks too much and doesn't know how to ignore things. She will say she likes speaking her mind, even though I adviced her that she will have lots of enemies by that lifestyle.
My parents live in the same town with me but hers are in the village. If things gets a bit rough I do visit the family shop and pick things on credit and pay later. This happens only when I'm low on budget.
After our honey moon, my wife refused to go back to work (her station is in another state) although she has been complaining that she doesn't like the job (her father helped secure it). Since she couldnt travel she kept calling the offixe and they were still paying her, only for some of her seniors whom she isn't in good terms with write against her and her salary stopped coming in. By this time I had to up my game and started husting harder. God another low paying job which didn't last and I continued with my biz. I lost the job because of lateness due to taking care of a pregnant wife and so on. In fact I lost 2 other jobs of same nature and wasn't bothered because they pay was very poor anyway.
When my wife put to birth, my mother (as hers is late) asked her to stay at our family house for a week,so she can look after her because I was still working at this time and my mother's business and other engagements is just around the house, my wife refused. Infact its not the refusal that touched me but the attitude she put up. Shortly after then I needed to relocate to a new aprtment and asked her to go over to the family house with the baby so I can move things which she did and the outcome of that visit was a heated quarrel with my mother. She accused her of telling my church members not to visit her after childbirth (my house is very far from the church) and even though it was a lie and I told her to shut up she kept on talking so many trash.
At home I cant talk to my wife and she keeps quiet. The will tell me to shut up to my face and one one occasion I landed her a small slap which left an eye bloodshot and this ended the shutup episode. Often times, if I talk she will raise her voice.
Four months after my wedding her father called me sounding angry and asking me why my wife is still with me, why she hadn't gone back to the state where she works, I overlooked. Some months back late last year, he repeated the same thing and even dropped the phone on me and just a week ago it happened again. My wife have refused to go back to work saying she will rather start a particular type of biz (which I'm trying to setup for her) but her family is talking behind my back all manner of absurd things.
My wife and I have been having our own bouts due to her attitude. I don't talk to neighbours again as she confided in one and laid bare exclusive family secrets and they had a quarrel and in front of my landlord, my neighbour spilled the beans and I felt so ashamed. My wife's salary has been stopped for over a year now and I have been solely the bread winner. I even got a car recently and uses it for transport to support other income.
My wife can nag about everything, she can wake me by 3am over petty things so I stopped sleeping in our bedroom and now sleeps in the guest room. If she's angry she'll not wash plates I eat with. This is someone I always wash her clothes and my with the machine since I married her. But she can hardly do same. If she cleans the house its favour and she'll keep murmuring. If we have an argument she'll start shouting, abusing my whole family and stuff.
This morning we had a quarrel and my wife told me I cant even take care of my family to provide for her, talking how she's leaving (she always tells me she'll leave and I've made it clear I'll gladly wait for that day).
I have been thinking about everything myself, since I married things have not really improved. Maybe I really made a wrong choice or rushed things (as I now believe), so I am planning on sending her away soon and them take me dad and kinsmen to her father (as is the culture in my place) for him to either caution his daughter or take her back because I might really injure her out of anger one day.
This is my last effort to save this marriage . I have only slapped her once in 2 yrs. I feel I should seek matured advice from experienced people here as I know I might be right in my own eyes. I really don't know what else to do.
PS: I'll answer any questions you might ask me. Forgive any typo. Thanks. bruv I think d worst of ur problems is, a lazy n talkative wife. nna na much much prayer on ur side and serious resolve on her side go solve am oh! you'll overcome by God's grace |
Religion / Re: Shepherd Bushiri's Wife Buys Rolls Royce Ghost As Anniversary Gift For Him by babz21(m): 2:37pm On Jul 17, 2017 |
yeanka007: Pope na enjoyment... pastor na miliki ![grin](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/grin.png) yeanka007: Pope na enjoyment... pastor na miliki |
Crime / Re: Man Paraded Unclad For Raping 5-Year-Old Girl (Photo) by babz21(m): 8:42pm On Jul 15, 2017 |
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Nairaland / General / Re: Fulani Herdsmen And Their Cattle Take Over Airport Road Abuja (Photos) by babz21(m): 8:00pm On Jul 15, 2017 |
StakerLives:
![cool](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/cool.png)
if they enter your farmland = you shout
if they attack your people = you shout
now they are grazing their cattles by the road side peacefully and you are still shouting. Did they block the road?
Useless slowpokes God bless fulanis God bless buhari nah ya types d hold us back 1 Like
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Celebrities / Re: Toke Makinwa Enchanting In White Swimsuit (Photos) by babz21(m): 6:44pm On Jul 13, 2017 |
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Religion / Re: How An Angel Of God Made Me Invisible To Guys Armed With Guns Who Came For Me. by babz21(m): 10:45am On Jul 09, 2017 |
intrepidJ: This story you are about to hear is %100 true. I will share with you the %100 raw account of what happened without refinement. It may come out crude But so be it. This event took place in late 2015.
Growing up I always knew I was different but couldn't figure out why. I had a terrible childhood that affected me in psychologically, emotionally, mentally and phsycally, but despite this the one area of my life that didn't change is my bizzare benevolence and generosity . I say bizzare because most people wonder what kind of am human being I am. Without meaning to come off as self aggrandizing, I have difficulty in telling someone NO if I am in a position to help. It affects me mentally to see people suffer like I did. If I am starving and finally gets a meal, if,I see someone hungry I am prone to give that person my food rather than go through the day in emotionally anguish with the thought of that person going hungry with nobody to help. I do not bear grudges, neither do I term anyone my enemy. Make no mistake, I am not a saint, far from it. I have many flaws, I have flaws that may shock you...but that one area of my life that I can't seem to change is my generosity and love. I get this "high" that sometimes brings me to tears when I help someone and see the expression of happiness and joy in the stunned expression of their faces. It's a high that transcends what any drug can possibly replicate and as a result whenever I am blessed I seek out people to help, I really don't care much about myself. There is no greater joy than in seeing the gratitude on the face of someone who once tried to have you killed after unexpectedly helping him. Because of this I barely have savings but surprisingly never lack. Can't remember the last time I saved 50k in my account but sometimes in a given week I spend over N100,000 in aid to people without expecting anything in return. Unfortunately this leads people to believe I am who I am not - an extremely rich millionaire, as a result in have been the target of so many.
For the sake of time and space I will skip the events that led to this astonishing moment that till this day I cannot explain.
So after a week of feuds whereby I was beaten up in public, have my cloths and my N150k tab smashed, by a guy who less than a month ago i voluntarily gave my tab because his phone was bad and ironically was wearing the very cloths I gave him just days before, I finally decide to put the event behind me and move ahead. I lack the skill or remaining angry for an extended period of time or,keep malice.
It's 8:30 pm at night when I get a call from this same guy unusually sounding unusually friendly, asking if I am home because he is on his way to see me, said he wants to talk. I said sure, I'm home. No sooner had I dropped the phone that I was immediately engulfed by an extreme sense of dread and anxiety. I tried to shrug it off but it only got worse, it was accompanied by the image of the event a week before where I was beaten up by the road side. Next thing I knew I found myself opening my gate and going outside. I looked at my foot and discovered I was bare footed. WTF !!. I decided to go back in and put on a shoe but instead found myself walking further away from the house. I decided to stop at a closed store and watch him come in .
Five minutes later to my astonishment I saw this guy, but he wasn't alone, he was in the company of about three or four guys. They stood outside the gate while he went in. Then he called and and in a friendly tone said he was at my door. I asked him who he came with, he insisted he was alone. By this time I am under no illusion about what this is, an attack, " to teach this show off boy who thinks he is better than me a lesson".
So for nearly 30 minutes i waited for them to leave, finally I saw him come out, stood at my gate for a while before deciding to leave. Thinking they are gone I decided to go back andnfiufht out what just happened. I am a very emotionally sensitive guy and will do anything to avoid stress, especially emotional stress. When I was close to my gate I was again bombarded by this strange feeling of dread. NOT AGAIN! ! I said to myself. decided not to take chances, uncalled a friend and asked if I could come to his house, I had a pressing issue. He obliged. Told him I was getting a cab and asked if he could pay for it as I had nothing on me. He found it odd but again obliged.
Now there is only one pathway leading to the main road from my house. By this time its past 10:pm, the streets are mostly empty by now. So there I was, bare footed walking to the road to hail a cab, when suddenly it hit me that for the past five minutes I have not been walking alone. It's hard to explain in words, how on earth Is this possible. Now all this happened in seconds. I looked at my side casually to see who it was, and to my astonishment it was this guy holding a gun. We were walking at the same pace and so close, the way and boy and his girl will walk, almost hand in hand. My spirit drove me to look at his face, the dude practically could not see me. I say the look of rage on his face and hate, it troubled me that I could be hated with such intensity.....but HE COULD NOTSEE ME !!
This is not an exaggeration. It is impossible not to see someone walking side side with you at the same pace in an empty street with no body in sight. He walked Sith me all the way to the road. When we got to the road i saw the other three guys that accompanied him to my place standing opposite the road, again they too could not see me. This felt like a dream but I was too stunned and scared to try to rationalise this. I crossed over and walked away from them tomthe opposite end as casually as I could. Each step felt like a thousand years, my heart was racing with fear. After having a childhood of uttering and pain and fear, trust me I knew hat fear was. But this type of fear was different, I never knew the human body could experience a fear like that. It's hard to put in words really, the closest description I can give is "SHEER TERROR". I took a cab and the rest is history.
The very next day I got a call from this guy saying I am a lucky man..." you get luck say you escape, I for blow your leg I you for know th kin person wey I be"
I will never forget this moment in my life. Its 11:41 pm July 8 2017, and as I type these words I'm having a hard time catching my breath, even after all this year's I still experience the fear when I remember how lucky I was.
Now I realise that there may be people with diverse opinions and all, I respect that. But in my view an Angel of the Lord sent by Yaweh, Jehovah God was protect in me. A spontaneous feeling of dread out of no where is impossible. God saw what was about to happen and planted that overwhelming feeling of urgency to flee...a feeling so great I fled barefooted. God's Angel made me invisible. I am not crazy, I was made invisible , I never even knew that was remotely possibly.
In conclusion. I am not born again, neither am i a saint. I am under no illusion I am holly or will make heaven if the rapture happens but I now realise one thing. Our God is a God of justice, God's laws cannot be altered when judgement comes...but even though we live in the dark, even though we are not saved, so long as we are aluve and on Earth Jehovah God never never gives up in sinners, he never stops helping sinners, he never stops protecting us sinners while on Earth because he knows man, caught in the middle of a spiritual war is no match for the kingdom of darkness.
Demons outnumber man by a thousand to one. Bven when we turn our backs on him he never forsaken us , he protects us, he still gives us a chance regardless of our sins. If God turns his back on sinners the kingdom of darkness are prepared to slaughter %99 of humanity. Such is the hatred these demons have for us. Eons ago they were once holy, they served God with happiness. But when God created humans in his image they became jealous. They saw the incomprehensible amount of love God had for his new creature, a creature lower than the Angels in heaven. In their jealousy they rebelled and thrown out of heaven. Even though we fell from grace God though the death of his son bought us salvation and forgiveness, a gesture not extended to the fallen angels. This drives the devil MAD with envy, jealousy and hatred on a scale the human mind cannot possibly comprehend.
God is real folks. Everyday he fights for us, even though we may not realise or see this battle going on. It's real. GOD is love, I have been a beneficiary of that love despite my sins and till the day I die I will never forget that.
the devil is a very big liar 2 Likes
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Religion / Re: How An Angel Of God Made Me Invisible To Guys Armed With Guns Who Came For Me. by babz21(m): 10:37am On Jul 09, 2017 |
intrepidJ: This story you are about to hear is %100 true. I will share with you the %100 raw account of what happened without refinement. It may come out crude But so be it. This event took place in late 2015.
Growing up I always knew I was different but couldn't figure out why. I had a terrible childhood that affected me in psychologically, emotionally, mentally and phsycally, but despite this the one area of my life that didn't change is my bizzare benevolence and generosity . I say bizzare because most people wonder what kind of am human being I am. Without meaning to come off as self aggrandizing, I have difficulty in telling someone NO if I am in a position to help. It affects me mentally to see people suffer like I did. If I am starving and finally gets a meal, if,I see someone hungry I am prone to give that person my food rather than go through the day in emotionally anguish with the thought of that person going hungry with nobody to help. I do not bear grudges, neither do I term anyone my enemy. Make no mistake, I am not a saint, far from it. I have many flaws, I have flaws that may shock you...but that one area of my life that I can't seem to change is my generosity and love. I get this "high" that sometimes brings me to tears when I help someone and see the expression of happiness and joy in the stunned expression of their faces. It's a high that transcends what any drug can possibly replicate and as a result whenever I am blessed I seek out people to help, I really don't care much about myself. There is no greater joy than in seeing the gratitude on the face of someone who once tried to have you killed after unexpectedly helping him. Because of this I barely have savings but surprisingly never lack. Can't remember the last time I saved 50k in my account but sometimes in a given week I spend over N100,000 in aid to people without expecting anything in return. Unfortunately this leads people to believe I am who I am not - an extremely rich millionaire, as a result in have been the target of so many.
For the sake of time and space I will skip the events that led to this astonishing moment that till this day I cannot explain.
So after a week of feuds whereby I was beaten up in public, have my cloths and my N150k tab smashed, by a guy who less than a month ago i voluntarily gave my tab because his phone was bad and ironically was wearing the very cloths I gave him just days before, I finally decide to put the event behind me and move ahead. I lack the skill or remaining angry for an extended period of time or,keep malice.
It's 8:30 pm at night when I get a call from this same guy unusually sounding unusually friendly, asking if I am home because he is on his way to see me, said he wants to talk. I said sure, I'm home. No sooner had I dropped the phone that I was immediately engulfed by an extreme sense of dread and anxiety. I tried to shrug it off but it only got worse, it was accompanied by the image of the event a week before where I was beaten up by the road side. Next thing I knew I found myself opening my gate and going outside. I looked at my foot and discovered I was bare footed. WTF !!. I decided to go back in and put on a shoe but instead found myself walking further away from the house. I decided to stop at a closed store and watch him come in .
Five minutes later to my astonishment I saw this guy, but he wasn't alone, he was in the company of about three or four guys. They stood outside the gate while he went in. Then he called and and in a friendly tone said he was at my door. I asked him who he came with, he insisted he was alone. By this time I am under no illusion about what this is, an attack, " to teach this show off boy who thinks he is better than me a lesson".
So for nearly 30 minutes i waited for them to leave, finally I saw him come out, stood at my gate for a while before deciding to leave. Thinking they are gone I decided to go back andnfiufht out what just happened. I am a very emotionally sensitive guy and will do anything to avoid stress, especially emotional stress. When I was close to my gate I was again bombarded by this strange feeling of dread. NOT AGAIN! ! I said to myself. decided not to take chances, uncalled a friend and asked if I could come to his house, I had a pressing issue. He obliged. Told him I was getting a cab and asked if he could pay for it as I had nothing on me. He found it odd but again obliged.
Now there is only one pathway leading to the main road from my house. By this time its past 10:pm, the streets are mostly empty by now. So there I was, bare footed walking to the road to hail a cab, when suddenly it hit me that for the past five minutes I have not been walking alone. It's hard to explain in words, how on earth Is this possible. Now all this happened in seconds. I looked at my side casually to see who it was, and to my astonishment it was this guy holding a gun. We were walking at the same pace and so close, the way and boy and his girl will walk, almost hand in hand. My spirit drove me to look at his face, the dude practically could not see me. I say the look of rage on his face and hate, it troubled me that I could be hated with such intensity.....but HE COULD NOTSEE ME !!
This is not an exaggeration. It is impossible not to see someone walking side side with you at the same pace in an empty street with no body in sight. He walked Sith me all the way to the road. When we got to the road i saw the other three guys that accompanied him to my place standing opposite the road, again they too could not see me. This felt like a dream but I was too stunned and scared to try to rationalise this. I crossed over and walked away from them tomthe opposite end as casually as I could. Each step felt like a thousand years, my heart was racing with fear. After having a childhood of uttering and pain and fear, trust me I knew hat fear was. But this type of fear was different, I never knew the human body could experience a fear like that. It's hard to put in words really, the closest description I can give is "SHEER TERROR". I took a cab and the rest is history.
The very next day I got a call from this guy saying I am a lucky man..." you get luck say you escape, I for blow your leg I you for know th kin person wey I be"
I will never forget this moment in my life. Its 11:41 pm July 8 2017, and as I type these words I'm having a hard time catching my breath, even after all this year's I still experience the fear when I remember how lucky I was.
Now I realise that there may be people with diverse opinions and all, I respect that. But in my view an Angel of the Lord sent by Yaweh, Jehovah God was protect in me. A spontaneous feeling of dread out of no where is impossible. God saw what was about to happen and planted that overwhelming feeling of urgency to flee...a feeling so great I fled barefooted. God's Angel made me invisible. I am not crazy, I was made invisible , I never even knew that was remotely possibly.
In conclusion. I am not born again, neither am i a saint. I am under no illusion I am holly or will make heaven if the rapture happens but I now realise one thing. Our God is a God of justice, God's laws cannot be altered when judgement comes...but even though we live in the dark, even though we are not saved, so long as we are aluve and on Earth Jehovah God never never gives up in sinners, he never stops helping sinners, he never stops protecting us sinners while on Earth because he knows man, caught in the middle of a spiritual war is no match for the kingdom of darkness.
Demons outnumber man by a thousand to one. Bven when we turn our backs on him he never forsaken us , he protects us, he still gives us a chance regardless of our sins. If God turns his back on sinners the kingdom of darkness are prepared to slaughter %99 of humanity. Such is the hatred these demons have for us. Eons ago they were once holy, they served God with happiness. But when God created humans in his image they became jealous. They saw the incomprehensible amount of love God had for his new creature, a creature lower than the Angels in heaven. In their jealousy they rebelled and thrown out of heaven. Even though we fell from grace God though the death of his son bought us salvation and forgiveness, a gesture not extended to the fallen angels. This drives the devil MAD with envy, jealousy and hatred on a scale the human mind cannot possibly comprehend.
God is real folks. Everyday he fights for us, even though we may not realise or see this battle going on. It's real. GOD is love, I have been a beneficiary of that love despite my sins and till the day I die I will never forget that.
may d spirit of d lord every b wit u n ur spirit! Amin 3 Likes 1 Share |
Travel / Re: Photo Of The Nigerian Air Force Helicopter Which Crashed Into A Water In Borno. by babz21(m): 11:37am On Jul 07, 2017 |
Jirate: Clever Piloting, Provided everyone on-board can Swim, that shallow water looks deep. Meanwhile, where is this Guy?...... ![](/faces/huh.png) sarcastic nigga! very legit question! 1 Like |
Foreign Affairs / Re: Battle Field Discussion (picture/video) Of African Military . by babz21(m): 7:01am On Jun 27, 2017 |
bidexiii:
NAF has received two MI-35 multirole helicopters from Russia and we are still expecting 10 more and MI-17 helicopters too. Its just funny that IHS Jane's would make such a mistake. well I guess sputnik news made d same mistake too! or could just b right! fingers crossed though. |
Travel / Re: My Pixs At Sumu Wildlife Park In Bauchi For Eid Celebration by babz21(m): 8:44pm On Jun 26, 2017 |
very nice, hope u guys had a fun time, barka da sallah to u all!!! |
Romance / Re: Wife Not A Virgin On Wedding Night As Claimed, What Will You Do? by babz21(m): 7:41am On Jun 13, 2017 |
![grin](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/grin.png) grade 1 tokumbos!!! lolz |
Foreign Affairs / Re: Battle Field Discussion (picture/video) Of African Military . by babz21(m): 1:15am On Jun 11, 2017 |
1 Like |
Health / Re: Please Help Am Suffering From Severe Pimples/acne PHOTOS by babz21(m): 1:06am On Jun 11, 2017 |
Jiang: ![grin](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/grin.png)
Stop eating groudnuts & blue band. Your probably allergic to them. They bring pimples like heat rash and egusi too!!! 1 Like |
Sports / Re: Nigeria Vs South Africa 2019 AFCON Qualifiers: 0 - 2 (Full Time) by babz21(m): 7:01pm On Jun 10, 2017 |
super chickens have done it again!!! |
Celebrities / Re: Soldiers Pose With 2face & Yemi Alade In Port Harcourt (Photos) by babz21(m): 8:14pm On May 26, 2017 |
korrect guy 2baba! always representing. dis yemi glasses sha, she suppose dey cee future oh! |
TV/Movies / Re: Chukwuma Onuekwusi Of Channels TV Is Dead by babz21(m): 1:02pm On May 23, 2017 |
RIP |