With how many goals?

Pastor Dream Slayer....Continued

I enter pastor office, he say...Alagba, Ejoko...i sit down, cross leg

He say....Oke isoro yin tidi petele!...i say Amin..he say....oya let me hear ya dreams

I say, thank you sir.

The pastor wear him glasses push him neck come front dey listen

So as I sleep, I see eja aro...cat fish, e carry dinosaur that wear canvas on the top and start flying, pastor say...wait, wait...Cat Fish carry Dinosaur?...i say Beni sir!..Pastor say....Okay continue....i continue

The dinosaur carry ibon ibile (Local Gun)...they now go to swimming pool...that is how small doctor just appear with Beyonce and shout

Hain Hain Hain Hain..Beyonce now say..Baoun Sin Geeeeeeel

Pastor shift him Neck go back.., e say...Shema nfagbo?..do you smoke weed?...i say, iranmi ofari!..my generation have not smoke before!.

So Daddy, the Dinosaur now come down and tie wrapper and start dancing skrrrrr gbese!...Leg work, Zanku, Shoni CC, bill am, efcc nbo..Japa...

Everywhere silent, pastor just focus on my face dey look me...e dey shock somehow....i come pause, I no talk, pastor too no talk, we just dey look ourselves....i say...Can I continue daddy?

Pastor say....It has not finish?..i say No, he say...Okay

I continue, so Daddy, the Cat fish is dancing krrrri gbese!, Gbe body eh!..i dey dance zanku to show pastor wetin I mean...so Zlatan jus enter!!...shout

Eko Wejenle!!

Pastor say....What is Zatan?..i say...Zlatan Ibile sir...Kapaichumarimarichopaco.

Pastor say...wait, Kileje sun?..wetin you chop sleep?

I say...Fufu iya Kamilu sir, I eat 6 sir, ebi ano yen oda, and it is only God that knows what mama Kamilu always put in her fufu, it's like it is Were, yes, madness, that thing is always too hard.

Pastor say...edeje mefa were yen?..and you eat 6 of that madness?...with disgust on his face

I say Yes.

Pastor say: that Gun that the dinosaur carry, where is it?.

I say...Kilefesishe sir? Wetin you wan take am do sir?�

To be Continued or ends here, depending on the response ��

Pastor Dream Slayer

Our pastor carry another pastor come on Sunday, e say the pastor dey gifted in interpreting dreams...say every dream wey we get wey dey give us problem to interpret, make we give the pastor say e go help us interpret am

Okay, Pastor collect mic say....Everybody shout Hallelujah!!!!...Shout Hallelujah cause all ya dream problems shall be solved today!!!..the Almightly Lord through me is ready for you!!!...any dream, bring it, I have been in this business since 1983. I have interpreted more dreams than Joseph in the Bible, I trained Joseph sef.

I will shock all of you today, they call me Pastor Dream Slayer ���

I eat dreams like Kuli Kuli. I have interpreted dreams for Shekau before

Church say...Eeeeehen?!!!!

Pastor say....Beni!.

Our pastor say....Somebody shout Hallelujah!!!!!

Hallelujah!!!!!!!!!!!

So everybody wey get confusing dream will line up here, I will be calling you one by one to explain ya dream give me and I go interpret am for you

Oshikababababababobobobo

I follow join queue, thank God for this pastor, some of my dreams need interpretation true true.

I dey on top queue dey speak in tongues, Elishibarabaraba, oh ye dreams....Oyela!!!..taba femoloju ariran....Oyela �����

People wey dan meet with pastor dey commot with smiles and praises...thank you Jesus ����..Pastor Dream Slayer, Thank you oh..so this is the meaning of this my dreams

I happy.

Pastor say Next!

Na me be Next.......

To Be Continued

Odoogu:

na officer's mess una dey oo

lmao, thanks boss for checking the story out

Odoogu:

na officer's mess una dey oo

lmao, thanks boss for checking the story out

Akakanfirstclass:
o Boy!.....

you be poet

Thanks boss, I can only try, I hope I get to see the front page one day tho

Akakanfirstclass:
o Boy!.....

you be poet

Thanks boss, I can only try, I hope I get to see the front page one day tho

E get some mess wey go make you confess ya sins ���

I say I sit down with one babe for office, we dey work..mess dey hold me but I think of the home I come from and the son of whom I am, I no gree mess, I dey hold am...make I no go embarrass my lineage

Small time, one bad demonic breeze enter my nose...i check my yansh, my mess still dey there, where this weapon of destruction come from?...i ask my spirit if na him mess....Eledami, shewo lo dara?..e say No...i no talk.

I come notice say anytime that demonic breeze come, the babe dey raise her yansh come my side....Walai the babe nyaso pami nisha ����� and me dey hold my own �����

She go lift her yansh to my side mess...the thing dey enter my nose mask from their enter my nose inside my brain.

E be like menthol, fine babe oh, na brain I dey use smell the mess...from person wey I dey respect �

The babe continue, she dey raise her yansh to my side dey drop the silent bomb..i no fit take am again

I just tap her and say....Sheni Asthma?...she say No..i say good

Naso she shift her yansh to my side again...na fire for fire we do this round

Me sef shift my yansh go her side.....pour out my mind through my yansh, na 5mins non-stop I take mess the mess, mess wey I dan hold for hrs, my own mess push her own go back into her yansh come fall for her nose..she scream oooooorooo!! come fall for her chair �����

The sys wey she dey take work reboot ��������.

She sniff the air come say....otiyimomilowo oh (Dem dan change am for me)��������..obumilowo!...she look me say, Boda mi emabinu , na me dey mess before but this particular one, kinshemi mo ya...(o be me do this one)..i know where e come from, na you...abeg no vex...

na the beans I chop this morning scatter my stomach, I no go do am again, make we end am like that...

I laugh ������

You think say na only you get rotten belle ba, me wey dey chop 7days beans with eyin awo ����

This one go use apology kill us...e dan do oh. This one go use apology kill us...e dan do oh.

mehn!

The Audacity, Confidence & Boldness. Serially attacking a governor's convoy??...Thats like what we watch in movies man.

I dey sleep jeje inside BRT, you go wake me up

Oga, to do what for you...

Did my leg touch you?...e say No
I dey use head knack you??...e say No
Did my hand touch you??..e say No

So why did you wake me up..���

Oga Why did you wake up from my sleep??..my phone ring?���...e say No..

I increase my voice inside bus

Excuse me sir, why did you wake me up?!!..Do you know me before

E say....ehn, i just feel say...you might not be comfortable on the seat.

Argh!..thats why you wake me up...are we sharing comfortable?...is my uncomfortability affecting ya comfortability?...Are we family??..how did you know I am not comfortable?..Are you me?..is me you?..Are me you?....Do you know where I sleep at home?

Which kind wahala be this, that babe nearly dan kiss me for dream and you wake me up?.��

What's the connection between me and you that you wake me up??

Ehn e say....not like that oh, I don't want you to pass your bustop.....

Abaye yin tie fe baje ni??!!!..the bustop that me and you are sharing??..if I pass my bustop, will you die?....is it ya bustop??...e say No....So why did you wake me up??����

Passengers come beg me sha, one agree to swap seat for me cause, I wan beat that man like who steal bet money...i say, you are very lucky MR. Man, if not for these good people, I will beat you for 600yrs!!

Rubbish, I dey sleep inside bus, you go wake me up for nothing. Mtcheeew

I go sit for my new seat, to cut long story short, I sleep again......when I wake up, na where dem dey park BRT overnight i find myself �����

Only me dey sleep with like 400 BRT buses �����

People are very cruel, why dem no wake me up?�������������

Na where I sit I still dey sleep, na only God sabi how the fat woman wey sit beside me take pass, be like say she carry me up, pass...come decorate me back there to dey sleep ������

Na 1 midnight I wake up, na there I sleep overnight �����...me with 400 brt buses ������..i just reach house now now

Abeg, if you see me sleep beside you, wake me up for no reason abeg ����

El Simpress

El Simpo