[quote author=mayor2013 post=42681452]Ijapa[mayor do u care To have one.

Growing up as a kid was fun,the memory of this lovely car adventure back then is still fresh in my memory.#what is the name of this car in your language#

NEWS BREAKING
An accident occurred today 11 people were injured ,12died so the minister of health says FG will give #5000 to the injured and #6,000,000 to the family of the dead for upkeep and funeral.
Suddenly, one of the injured got up secretly and laid where the dead were ;
Surprisingly, one of the dead said my dear go back to that place no bring wahala ooo, dey have counted us oh...

Ikemefuna is a house-boy who drinks his Boss’ wine with impunity then adds water to cover his tracks.
His boss became suspicious and decided to buy
Pasties (a French wine that changes color if you add water-just like Dettol). Unaware of this, Ikemefuna drank the wine as usual and topped it up with water. Immediately he added water, the Pasties became milky and he knew he was in trouble. When the boss came back and saw the changed Pasties, he knew he had nailed Ikemefuna. Ikemefuna, knowing he was in trouble, decided to stay put in the kitchen when his boss came home. The Boss, having told his wife what he observed, now swung into action.
“Ikemefuna!” he called from the sitting room.
Ikemefuna answered: “Yes, Boss.”
“Who drank my pasties?” Ikemefuna: No answer.
So the Boss went to the kitchen to meet him
there: “Are you insane or what? Why when I
call, you say “Yes, Boss”, but when I ask you a
question you don’t answer me?”
Ikemefuna retorted, “Hmmm, Oga. When you
are in the kitchen you don’t hear anything at
all, except your name.”
“Is that so?” asked the Boss, “Okay, go to the
bar stand beside Madam, while I go into the
kitchen. And then, you ask me a question.”
Ikemefuna accepted. When his Boss was in the
Kitchen he shouts, “Boss.”
“Yesss, Ikem!” Boss answers.
Ikemefuna then asks, “Who goes into the
maid’s bedroom when Madam is not at home?”
No answer.
Ikemefuna shouts again: “Boss, I say who dey
sneak into the maid’s room when Madam no dey
house?”
No answer.
The Boss runs back from the kitchen shouting,
“Wonders shall never cease! Ikemefuna, it is
true ooo-when one is in the kitchen, one does
not hear anything except one’s name.”
The wife, now very angry, interrupts, “That’s
not true. It’s a lie! Without a doubt.”
Ikemefuna asks if she’ll enter the magic
kitchen to test it. She agrees.
Ikemefuna asks, “Madam, who is Junior’s
biological father? Me or the Boss?”
Madam rushed out of the kitchen. “This
Kitchen needs to be fumigated ooo! I can’t hear anything at all….

Obioraaa:
I'll answer your question with a question..



so, when you use cotton bud dy clean ear..who the cleaning dy sweet?? The ear or the cotton bud??

funny sharp nigga.

Iammetallic what response did u get frm mama.

Be sincere,who enjoys Sex Most?. -------A. Boys -------B. Girls. If you're a virgin just say "Hmmmm" Mature answer pls.

BREAKING NEWS!!!


RAMSEY NOAH, the famous and pretty boy
Nigerian actor passed away this morning.
He died when armed robbers attacked him
at his house. The police arrested the murderers two hours later and are awaiting to be sent to court for sentence.
This happened in a movie I am watching right now. Thank you for ur attention, am off to disturb another group.

GOES TO MARKET.!!! *I was asked 2 get sometinz at d market, but due 2 my illiteracy, my mum gave me a list 2 help me buy accurately LIST MAGGI:#10 SALT:#50 OIL:#200 FISH:#400 TOTAL:#660 So i left d aous around 11am and at 3pm I was not yet bak 4rm the market. My mum got so worried & decided 2 call me on phone. Mum: helo thiago , wats holding u, u av stayed too long; wat happened? Thiago : I av bought every tin, bt still lukin for TOTAL dat u included. I av gone round d market, nobody have total bt am lucky bcus, i met a man here who Directed me to TOTAL petrol station, So am on my way 2 d station 2 check whether i will see TOTAL and Buy. Do not laff alone me ooo

CocoLoca:
Very true. I heard Kendricks ancestor was the lucky one that they took on the slave ship while M.I's ancestor missed the boat because he was a pygmy and they didn't see him on time!

Common sense is not common.

BeeBeeOoh:
Na me be that "Ator wey u dey hear. Ator no dey die nah

u dey decieve urself u fit dodge bullet kaaakaaaakkiiiii kakau.

[color=][/color]How many of us still remember this "Actor N Boss" War fought by kids in those days?? ...anyway, If you have not fought this war, then your childhood was not sweet oh.... . You need to go back now and fight this war... Wait oh, it seems am among this kids oh, who can spot me (semblance) out of this three kids

chymystique:
That Man is a PIG and real N¥mpho! .. That woman is kind sef... this kin thing na to sleep off as he is having the sex when him tire him go bug off... Yeye Man

if u sleep off when your man sample u,it means d area don turn basket.

David Playpenz of Colchester, Essex was in a motorcycle accident in which he hurt his hand. When he showed it to doctors a few days later, and one of the fingers had turned black, they said that the digit would have to be amputated. Playpenz went through with the procedure and later asked to be able to take his severed finger home. "Sure!" said the doctors, who had no idea what he planned to do next. Playpenz, who is in his 30s and is a bonded furniture maker by trade, apparently was always curious about cannibalism. “I'd always wondered what human flesh tastes like. But it's taboo. People can't go around being cannibals – that's illegal. Only then, it occurred to me that no one could haul me to court for eating my own flesh. I decided to cook it and taste it. Then my curiosity would be satisfied.” He happily photographed the event for posterity, saved the bones, and posted the whole thing on his Facebook page, including the boiled finger. Needless to say, Playpenz got mixed reactions from friends, though it seems that he was correct that he would not be charged with any crime.

Yustash001:
For me...the most competitive league is Epl...and the best league is Laliga based on their performance in european competitions...

iagree with you.

Still confused about the best league of the world with the way football is been played this days.I once argued that the EPL is the most competitive league in the world just because it is the most viewed in the world,from all the stars in EPL in the ongoing copa America they perform woefully,why stars from la liga and serie play fantastic footbal,am confused is EPL the most skillful league in the world, let me have your say my sport loving fans.

I pray may u not fall a victim of mis waka meaning arin tesesin.All this happen to me on 26~06~2015 after closing from work exactly 9pm on days when am on afternoon duty,been friday as a hustler i work with one of d biggest company in ondo state capital Olam coop cocoa,i decided to calm my nervers with a bottle of Ace Root and a Bottle Water spread my leg as if i dey my papa living room on my left hand hold my white london smoking away my sorrow and busy focusing at the sex workers booby nd ukwuchi already my dicktionary don dey misbehave just carried away with this old woman apples busy dangling in front of her heavy weight chest.So naso i discover at once all this brothel workers started running inside i thought it is there madness to chase each other.I con try balance myself well hoping for them to come out naa hin i here gentle man can i know u i look up i saw dis smello officer may b naa constable self as in shoe wey dey hin leg dey beg for mercy make e change ham instantly my eye clear say i don enter one chance.

mouaue:
Donjazzy share his new hair cut on instagram ,...So what do you think ?

https://instagram.com/p/3wNswdtR23/?taken-by=donjazzy

If u think u are fed up with life.....U just take a tipper plane 2ru dana air way road to nairaland u go laugh ur belle out.....Wetin person to go read 4 here CLICK LIKE if I yarn 2ru.

Eedris Abdulkareem had granted a couple
interviews in which he claimed he made Tima
and nurtured him to be the star he is now.
But the self-acclaimed Egberipapa 1 of Bayel
wasn’t smiling at all when Saturday Beats ask
him to react to Eedris’ claim. He thundered,
Timaya however admitted that he learnt one
two things from Eedris which helped him in life.


“When I was with Eedris Abdulkareem, did he give
recognition? Eedris did not make me who I am today.
the one that went to meet Eedris in his house. He
treated me well. I would stay at the front of his gate
morning till night and he would send somebody to tell
come back after a week. When I returned the following
he would not see me. I used my money to pay to atte
shows even though I was his band member. I w
celebrated.
"
The only money Eedris paid me in his life was N1, 0
it was after we had the Kuramo Beach show. Th
nothing compared to the money I had been spendi
transport. I was not bothered because I wanted a pl
and I was learning.
Like I always tell people, whatever you want in life, y
just need to make sacrifice. Even if they feed you poo
are not going to eat it forever. I gained a lot from that
experience. It was through him that I met Sound Sultan
lot of people. Eedris and I don’t do the same kind of m
so he does not influence me musically. I have never bee
studio where he was recording before and he never gav
that opportunity, so how did I learn anything from hi
queried.
"

This has got to be one of the worst injury you've
ever. According to MTO, the man fell from his
window, and landed on a metal rod. Thankfully
doctors were able to remove the pole and the
man survived. He is expected to make a full
recovery. But you won't believe where the rod
pierced. It's quite graphic.

Omotayor123:
Some weeks back, My friend Complained about her Boyfriend telling her Not to come visiting him if she's on Menstral.

And then I was like; Maybe he's only dating you for s3x.


Yesterday my neighbor boyfriend came visiting. And when he realized she's on Menstral he refused to sleep on the same bed with her. She said when she tried to touch him during sleep he pushed her and rolled away from her reach.

I have seen a guy who told me he can't eat a food prepared by a girl on Menstral save he doesn't know.



Isn't this injustice and barbaric towards women folk
Does this happens among married couples as well

I see it as unreasonable torture to womanhood.

What are your views on this matter...?



Cc. lalasticlala, orijin101, wristwatch, Freeman, ipledge, tosyn2much and other Romancelanders.

I love to have s*x with my boo when she is on,even mouth action.
No curse ohhhhhh just my own contribution to this silly thread.

RedBenson:


Lol. Him never know say person dey wey pass person. Small boy making noise. How many him don fucck sef?

lol no time to check time,must u comment silly muan.

She is gone R.I.P but her punna honey well lives on.

HeavenShield:
which one be giant Jesus?

Nairaland student,Giant Jesus that one naa otuoke e dey.

DeeTus:
LOL

I wonder why u cannot hold ur hands,must u comment on my post with ur mugulious MB.

agarawu23:
padlock your d!ck when your wife is not around if that will help


if the issue is the same, come back and ask me for plan B

bros is that your own piece of advise to padlock my strong room.

It all started since my secondary school days, influenced by bad friends we cultivated the habit of visiting sex workers popularly called (ASEWO) in my area. I found lot of pleasure in doing this dirty act to the extent I started bringing them home after my higher institution.

Right now i have met the woman I love and I wish to spend the rest of my life with, but I find it hard to stop visiting this sex workers despite she satisfies me.

I don't just know what to do keep my self from the ugly scene am planning to settle down.

I don't want a broken home.