Zonefree:

With how many kids.

She had 1 and we have 2 together

Zonefree:
Your married a single mum?

Yes she was a single mum when I married her

I had done everything for pur marriage to work but she refused to amend our marriage and we separated now that I am living happily with my new babe then boom she started spreading rumours about me molesting her daughter something I have never done before she is doing all this thing because she is jealous that I am living happily after our separation. So I've contacted her asking her why is she spreading false allegations on me and if she is sure that I molested her daughter she should take the matter to the police so the police will request for a medical report on the child to see if I did it or not. She said she will take the matter to the police which she hasn't done but she keep spreading rumours about something that I have never done and people started believing her without her having any valid evidences. She is ruining my reputation with lies and I don't know what to do? Please help

Stevenbright:


Your plan is a great one but inform her to make sure the business is successful, otherwise she will be on her own.

To ensure it works for the good of both of you, follow up with her, don't just look away. You can contribute ideas or other strategic issues concerning the business.

Alright thanks I will explain everything to her

GboyegaD:


It takes two to tango though. Don't blame the guy only.

@handsomejok,
Why are you getting someone else pregnant when you and your wife barely separated?

To be honest with you I started dating with her before my ex wife and I separated, our marriage wasn't working so I needed someone else to keep me company. I am not proud of what I did but I am just being honest with you.

immortalcrown:
Give her the money and tell her the purpose of the money.

I am tempted to tell you that you are very..., let me not say it.

Alright thanks

Please I need matured advice only if you have nothing better to say concerning this matter do not comment , there are over 1000 posts in this forum leave mine alone and please go and look for posts that will please your heart. Waiting for matured men and women to give me some good advice which I will benefit from it.

Caaz:
So many damaged men on this forum.


What an irresponsible man.
Harvesting kids anyhow with different women


Smh

You didn't answer my question please I need matured advice

immortalcrown:
1.
You don't want her to hustle now because of the six-month-old baby.

2.
The same you want to give her 150k now for her to start a business.

3.
The ex had a child with her ex before you started with her.

You have a six-month-old baby with the ex but your current girlfriend is already pregnant.

Is this a fiction?

It is no fiction please am very serious , starting her own business in front of the house is better than her working for someone else with a small baby. Nobody will even hired her with a small baby

mariahAngel:
Now, I believe you're a troll.

You can do whatever the heck you want. You're the scriptwriter.

Keep on updating us, you hear?

At least, Obavoh isn't this annoying with his own storyline.

Please madam I am not a troll , is it a crime to ask for advice here? please tell me how I am annoying have I ever beg you or anyone in this forum for money to feed my family ?

Please if you think my post is annoying skip it and find other post that will not annoy you

My ex and I share 2 children together she also had a child from her previous relationship, we are separated and I provide for her and the children. She isn't working because our last child is only 6 months old hence I am still providing for her child from her previous relationship until the baby is old enough for her to work .
Due to the harsh economy my shop is dry and I can't afford to provide everything for them again and I don't want her to go and hustle with a small baby.
I've requested a loan of 500k from a family friend because I wanted to top up my my shops. he gave me 350k which I am grateful. I want to give my ex wife 150 out of the 350k for her to establish herself with a profitable business for her to take care of the rent and her daughter school fees meanwhile I will be paying our daughter school fee and will continue to send something for the children like feeding money .
My hands are full I cannot longer keep providing rent and her daughter school fee because I have other bills too including my shop and my own house rent , plus my girlfriend who's pregnant that am living with her. I do send 15k to 25k monthly for feeding plus the children school fees , the rent will be expired by August. So she will not start paying rent immediately she has some months left.

My question is if you were in my position , what would you have done ?

Tayorshd87:

I understand you but I guess u don't really have a higher income that's why u are thinking 15k is fine because if u guys are living together u should know u will spend more than 15k for them before d month runs out 🤔

Please think about it

Yes I don't have a higher income and I cannot even rent a room for myself because I have put them as my top priority

LadyG05:



You must be a wicked man to think that 15k for 2 kids is sufficient a month. Even if you stock the house with foodstuffs, there is no where 50k will be sufficient.


You expect this woman to feed each child with #250 daily ( morning, afternoon and night)

You said one of the children is not yours so her mom should fend for her.


If you continue in this wickedness, Go.d will send help to them but your end will be miserable.

Don't call me wicked man you don't know my financial states if I had a lot of money I wouldn't have been sleeping in my shop I can only give her what I have by cutting my coat according to my size

kevwemike:
bros u try, in my own case i collect my children, and I have been the one taking good care of them bços my x wife vow to mk my life miserable but now I have move on and I and my 2 children we have great peace

Collecting them from her is impossible because my daughter is 3 and my son is 2 months old I don't trust my mum or my siblings with my children anymore and their mum is the only one who can take better care of them

slimjohn2k5:
15k monthly?
For children, not child?
In this economy?
You are the problem in the marriage not ur wife.
You either increase the money or hustle more

Yes for 3 children aside from the 15k I will also be paying their rent, school fees for 2 children one is my stepdaughter plus Nepa bills I don't think that 15k is small

Skyview01:
15k monthly, for what!

For my children upkeep

osmosis101:
I DONT THINK SO

How?

I had done everything for the marriage to work but all my effort were in vain because my wife refused to amend which she had made it clear to me that after our first separation she did came back to me because she had nowhere to stay with the children and I keep having reccuring dreams of her wanting me dead since she is not ready to work on the marriage and I had decided to put an end to the marriage for the sake of our children I will not send her packing neither will I take custody of the children I will let her and the children to stay in the rented house and I will move out of the house and I will be sending upkeep money 15k every month I hope I had made a good decision for my own sanity ?

jackmrandy:


what caused the first separation?

can you be with the kids without her being present. You take care of the kids. How old are the kids?

Remember dreams and imagination do come thru .

Thirdly waitin carry you go fake prophet house?

Answer all these questions before i can give my one cent advice

We separated because I was doing so well before marrying her just 2 months 5 days after our wedding I lost my shop through fire. My mum said it was not normal for something like that to happened just few months after my wedding and she thought that my wife was behind it so she took me to her prophet. He said that my wife was a witch and she was behind everything that was happening to me. The children are 10, 3 and 1 months but the first one is not my biological child.

fortunateme:

Baba, use ur head. Put your self first else you'll end up where you dream of.
Is the house yours or rented? Will she inherit your property in the of your demise?
Do this
Avoid her food or you two must eat together. Don't sleep in the same room and finally, don't keep quiet about it. Report her to your family and hers and even the police let her sign an undertaking.
Fear woman

The house is rented and I am managing my small shop there is nothing to inherit.

I have been a victim of fake proohet which has destroyed my home in the past.

My wife and I were separated before and we have reconciled although our marriage is not the best but we are managing staying together for the sake of our children.

I have a problem bothering me that I keep dreaming about her wanting to kill me this dream is coming more often and I strongly believed she has no intention to harm me but I remember once when we were arguing I asked her why she has decided to come back to me if she doesn't want to do any effort to amend our marriage.

She said she cane back to me because she had nowhere to stay with the children. When I think about what she said and also the way she treat me like her enemy I am scared and I started to think of what if she came with a plan to harm me to revenge back all the suffering I have put her through. I am confuse and I don't know what to do right now please advice me?

Reinamaria:


After asking God, your wife and child for forgiveness, it is time for you to forgive yourself.
Let go of that guilt.
Stop bringing your (self) issues here for you to be judged over and over again.
Nobody is perfect.

Try, try, and try to sort things out with your wife.
Keep being good to her and your children, and one day, she will genuinely forgive you from the bottom of her heart.
It is time to stop being hard on yourself. Let go of that burden of guilt.

Thanks 🙏

Thank you to everyone for all the advice and insults much appreciated 🙏

I saw folic acid on our bed I asked her why is she using them for . She said she is pregnant was shocked and I asked her why did she not tell me the good news she said she has forgotten. I remember a month ago I noticed some changes in her body I asked her if she was pregnant she said no and I overlooked it. I feel so bad for her to keep this wonderful good news from me and what pained me is she is almost 3 months and I still had no idea. I know I have hurt her a lot in the past which I have apologised to her from the bottom of my heart and I don't know why she is still making life difficult for me. No matter what happened she shouldn't have hidden the pregnancy from me for 3 good months and I am begining to wonder if the pregnancy is even mine or not. It is right for a wife to hide a pregnancy from her husband? I need your inputs please 🙏

frozen70:


Trust and love is like a sticker, once removed from where it was initially pasted, it will not stick well again

I think she is no longer free with you base on the paste experience and she will keep using that to fight you because she doesn't know when next you will deal with her

So, my advice is stop all naughty behavior and treat her nicely, at first she will doubt your genuineness

But if you keep doing good, she will accept that you are now responding to change and if you continue with a good behavior and it will erase partially and a new life will begin

You alone knows what you do that she doesn't like and such behavior brings out the madness in her

The moment you change your attitude she too will change

But if you continue with that same thing that caused the problem

She too have made up her mind long ago that it's either its working out or not

She doesn't care

Thanks

Richy4:

You are welcome... so you know, You might be apologizing for the rest of your life for that singular act...You might remain like that forever if u don't set boundaries....

You offended her, BIG DEAL!!... But learn to set boundaries between what is happening presently and her using the present situation to judge the past...

Do not expect her to forget but set a strict boundary between past and present situations... Fight tooth and nail to overcome her using the past to guilt trip... If not she might ask you to walk across the highway one day, and because of what u did to her, u might just do it..

Thanks I appreciate your advice

worriedhubby:


Don't say some men. Say, some people. Women do it too. I have been married for 9+ years. Everything my wife does must be sanctioned by the mother or brother. If you have any discussion with her, she to confirm from the mom if she should do what you said.

Some humans are just ridiculous. This OP just allowed his mother with assistance of fake prophets to mess his life for him.

This OP just allowed his mother with assistance of fake prophets to mess his life for him.


My mother never knew that they were fake ,we were both victims

Saintmary:
My heart breaks for the woman who was dragged in the mud in such a horrible way.


She should not even return to this man but she did for her own reasons, now this husband is expecting her to just forget like that?


So sad.


Mr man, it will take many years before she can truly forgive you, like more than 5 years. If you can't wait, let her go.

Mr man, it will take many years before she can truly forgive you, like more than 5 years. If you can't wait, let her go.


Ok

Davidave:
It's not easy for a man to own up to his mistakes,and I commend u for that.At least,u kn where the problem is coming from.
Oga,set Ur alarm for 4:am.Make sure u wake up by that time.Just boil some water,Make some tea and bread(I bet u never did that for her).Carry it in a clean tray,with quality bread,to her into the bedroom.Tell her that u have come with a peace offering,that u just want Ur wife back.Tell her how sorry u are again,and that u need her to forgive u.
I didn't say u should cry,but be soft spoken and honest with every word coming out of Ur mouth.
Women love those little bribes.So,try it.

Thanks

worriedhubby:


Op, while it is good for any man or woman to retain a good level of self-esteem in marriage, you are at the mercy of your wife on this matter. I have been in your wife's position. The only difference is my spouse hasn't stopped running around all these fake pastors/prophets.

Accusations of infidelity, financial recklessness etc are easily settled and forgiven. But you see accusation of "witchcraft " from a spouse? It is the highest level of psychological and emotional abuse. If that woman get mind to continue living with you, be grateful. Pray, that God will help her to forgive you. Only God can delete that pain from her heart. After that, maybe, when you see all these pastopreneurs and pulpit bandits you will look twice.

Thanks

Sapiosexuality:
These criminals called pastors have destroyed many homes that I think the government should get involve.

Someone very close to me today can no longer see because one of these fools told him a health problem was actually spiritual.

The foundation of one's mind has a lot to do here. If your mind has been tempered by religious nonsense it will be easy for your mind to plant, harvest and eat the garbage these madmen vormit.

You really think if they want you dead you stand a chance. As an average Nigerian, anybody that wants you dead can kill you. They don't even need any spiritual connections to do that. Imagine someone that, possibly, cooks for you wants to use spiritual powers to kill you. Nonsense!

Give her time. You broke her psychologically and mentally and it will take a lot of time for that to heal. That's if you don't fall for another clown whenever you are down.

Give her time. You broke her psychologically and mentally and it will take a lot of time for that to heal. That's if you don't fall for another clown whenever you are down.


Thanks

Klass99:


Lol, kpele o. But I thought you said it was the fake pastors, now it is your mother?

But I thought you said it was the fake pastors, now it is your mother?


You asked me what made me to believe witchcraft stories I said my mother because she introduced me to those fake pastors and I believed all their lies because I trusted my mother