Na wa oh! I know that feeling.

God does have a hand in marriage if you chose to marry but the Bible says "he who findeth a wife, findeth a good thing". The finding part is entirely your business; you have to do the finding yourself with your own eyes! God will be there to order your steps and set you on the right path as you do the "search".

People praying do so for many reasons all geared towards preventing them from "looking in the wrong places". Are you righteous as expected by God? You are already on the right path if you are. It does not mean it will come easy or there wont be challenges when you are married to the ONE, but God will be there to sustain you and keep you to stand firm when the battle comes.

Anybody hiring/using underage folks for any kind of work should be put in jail, does not matter whether these house maids are sent to school or not. Child labor is a no no! Adoption is an opportunity for those that want to rescue these kids.

There are adults looking for housekeeper work in Nigeria, they are stronger and do better job.

No you cannot! NGN38,000 will not take you far. From your post, you would like to go hustle in Ibadan, God bless your hustle but please stay away from crime when you go broke. Because you will.

Ibadan is still transiting from a NGN500 to NGN1,000 economy and there are not so many opportunities. I am curious to see what you will end up doing especially with no plans and not knowing anybody.

And please stop comparing your adventure with going to Europe, they are too different!

Brabus,

My first time posting on any of your thread, I like this project the most for a couple of reasons.

Not sure if the kitchen you put up is the preference of the owner but I was expecting something better, like a "popeye" kind of design/image for a project of this status. In fact, I was expecting a backyard kitchen too aside the one inside. With this kind of building, the fun should be more on the outside!

Good job all the same!

A boy was sharing his experiences when he got back from Nigeria, he said "everybody back in Nigeria has a personal jailhouse" and uncle Tony's was the biggest! He was describing the fence around all the homes he visited.

Electricity went off and the young girl not used to power failure started screaming, rubbing her eyes and shouting "mummy, I have gone blind"!

vivianc:

I don't understand what "responsibility" I should take. And this is not about me. The rest of the things you are saying are completely out of point.

People don't just react to nothing, they react to actions. While you don't give any Tom and Jerry the right over your emotions, I agree with that. No one is obligated to us, i agree but when a certain person occupies a certain position or space in our lives s/he is obligated to us.

The guy should take responsibility for his actions too that provoke this lady. If this guy is engaged to this lady, he is obligated to her, to treat her right at all times but if he doesn't, the lady has every right to be angry.

Its not everything that's the lady's fault. That he first complained doesn't make him innocent!

Secondly, people's temperament differs, so are their horoscopes. Find out where your partner falls in. If you don't know all these, then you shouldn't advice people on behavioural issues, cos you are not qualified to do so.

Usually don't do come backs but there are always exceptions.
(1) Part of my comments that seemed out of point were directed at your personal experience that you shared, thought it was obvious.
(2) Again, reacting to somebody's action is what I was asking you not to do! You have control over how you react but never on the actions coming at you!
(3) I agree that every body should treat everybody right but sadly, we don't live in an ideal world.
(4) Never wrote anything about the lady being at fault, I listened to Chimamanda when she talked about the dangers of a single side story and learnt valuable lessons.
(5) Temperament may differ but everybody must control their tempers otherwise it becomes an insane world. If in doubt, go to Ojota motor park watch those touts for like 15 minutes.
(6) Sorry, I don't do horoscopes and don't believe that has got anything to do with anybody's behavior.

vivianc:

What is it that you always do to her that makes her so angry? Have you searched yourself? Or is she a lunatic? Why don't you just reassess yourself and make her happy for once!

Humans have different temperament, so don't expect her to be like you! You might be the type that surpresses his anger, that's your temperament, not hers!

I'm the type that voices my anger out depending on who is involved. I was getting close to this guy that felt and complained that I get angry all the time. One day I sat down and reflected on things and I realised that yes, i have been angry alot in that friendship but the truth of the matter is the guy does so many things so wrong and he expects me to suck it up. I called him, sat him down and talked to him. I'm not a lunatic but clearly he has turned me into one. He brings out the worst in me and I told him it was best he is no longer in my life anymore.

So what am I saying? This could be your fault! It could be that you do so many things so wrong! What do expect? For her to suck it up and smile and give you a gold medal? You bring out the worst in her, so its either you find a way to turn things around or you take a walk.

You are running away from taking responsibility for your behavior, it has nothing to do with what the guy did but everything to do with how your reactions/responses.
Stop giving people so much power over your emotions; life will always throw mean and sometimes deadly punches at us, how we respond determines our success or failure.

Yes, all the oil companies have QA/QC or Exploration Labs where you can work as Lab Tech, Lab Analyst, Lab Chemist, etc.

WIHELMINA: Can a Bsc pure and applied chemistry graduate work in an oil & gas company? If yes,what post?

Why would a "yellow" woman command higher price? No wonder some are bleaching! What's wrong with some men?

What can she do? Nothing! She need to move on and focus on rebuilding herself, wont be easy but she must pick herself up quickly.

God is merciful and will show mercy if she ask.

Nice recipe! Amunututu is one of the best vegetable around, better prepared with little bit of egusi (melon). You wont eat this everyday so the little egusi is ok; this goes with all the solids (similar to the red hibiscus - isapa).

Where can I find the seed, need to plant some?

ayuzee: 1. A building of 4 No flat of 3 bedroom each, 2 Toilets\Bath along with 3 bedroom bungalow building on a 2 plots of land at Elewura, Challenge, behind GLO Office. Title Registered Conveyance.
Price:25M (asking).

2. Å twin bungalow building on a standard plot of land at Alaafin Avenue, Oluyole Main EState. Title: C of O. Price: 45M (asking).

3. Å 7 bedroom detached Duplex house at Agbowo U.I. Price: 20.6M (asking)

4. Plot of land behind Ayefele Music House, Felele. Title: C of O. Price 7M (net).

5. Plot of land measuring 900 sqmts at FOdacis. Titlle: C of O. Price 4M (net)

6. Plot of bare lannd at Elebu, fenced with barbed wire, security light and Å functional borehole. Titile: Agreement. Price 5M (net)

7. Plot of land at new Bodija. Title C of O. Price 15.

No contact/phone or office? Are you hiding?

Woged2005:

. I enjoyed the story. U'll make a good kiddies story writer. Maybe that's a calling u've not given a thought yet

Honestly sometimes I wonder about some morals we keep at our own expense..while some people take advantage of other's goodwill.

Thanks for the compliment, who knows where the legs are taking the head?

Just wanted to offer some clarifications as regards the so called scam that you reported in your earlier post vis a vis Yazmin's input.

Bottom line is that your friend cannot do that transaction over the counter (aside the fact that he is personally responsible for the funding of his dorm account).

It is surprising that your friend wanted to do that volume of transaction without know the proper channel to take. He was trying to import goods into the country and would need to do proper documentation (Form M et al) through the bank.
The bank will handle the entire transaction (including moving the funds to pay abroad) but the bank must show (CBN) proof of how the forex was spent otherwise they will be in trouble with the CBN.

Paying mortgage abroad is even simpler than buying goods, yet no bank will use the bank's forex to make payment for anybody until you complete the required doumentation.

The mallam part is the only sore point because the bank should have left your friend alone after providing the requirements to handle his transaction. It does not mean the bank has a business relationship with the mallam, that arranagement exist due to the peculiarity of our situation. Some of us would not like to go buy fake forex from one mallam in town, we prefer those known by the bank where we don't even handle the money lest it is fake.

lastpage:

My apologies.
He actually insulted me verbally in his earlier post thus l gave him a dose of his own medicine but as you rightly observed, l need not come down to that level.

Tx.

Lastpage!

Scorpion needed a ride across the river and begged a frog to help out, the frog said he would carry the scorpion on the back across the river if scorpion would not sting him! The scorpion promised not to sting the frog and so they started the ride; just as they were about arriving on the other side of the river, the scorpion gave the frog a nasty sting. The frog was mad and asked why scorpion could not keep his promise to which the scorpion replied "it is part of me to sting, it is the way I was created"

Moral of the story - let nobody cause you to change, in fact you will lose some of what makes you happy if you try to change. Live the way you are wired and let those people deal with their issues.

Woged2005:

I know, but I am only considering stopping helping those who don't help me either when I need their help. Why give a sh**uu**t about people who don't give sh**uu**t about you? Must I pay someone to love or like me & be my friend? That's how I feel when I work too hard to keep a relationship..while the person acts like he/she's doing me a favor spending my money....

People, please. You should never grab anything from a burning house except if it is right there beside you, not heavy and wont require an extra second to grab.

Every second counts when you are in a burning house, most people die from the effect of the smoke (asphyxiation) rather than the fire itself.

Be guided.

.

excelsiorfarm: acknowledge & replied your mail,i have written some,also for a few nairalander(s)but i will need a few detail as what is the aim, type & size of project,location.GOD BLESS

Sorry, my post was meant for 4tunebest. Will get back to you on another study.

4tunebest: Thanks Mr Excelsior

I sent you a mail, can you write a feasibility study?

Just a couple of ideas to add to the discourse.

- Government cannot do nothing here, govt itself is limping!
- Forget about anybody helping you with any struggle, only very few people in Nigeria will genuinely help others.
- You guys should not get too emotional about this, so you can focus on dealing with issues objectively.
- It is fine if your chosen path is to work for somebody, now get up and learn how to get that job. Believe me, it is more than the paper qualification you hold. Think of what value you will add to the business and watch how you will be celebrated. Be creative in your job search.
- Understand that there is something called growth; if you start with N20,000/month today, you can move to N80,000 tomorrow and N150,000 the day after.
- Be faithful in those little jobs, there is a reward for hardwork.
- For those wanting to start a business, now is the time. Nigeria as of today is like a train at its station, you won't be able to catch up when electricity suplly improves. People are working hard, don't get left behind!

All the best in your quest, folks.

Great thread, very detailed.

Thanks for sharing.

excelsiorfarm: the complete entrepreneur modules is available, i manual,over 60 biz,over 120 pages, from cassava,maize, fish, nylon, branding, poultry,snail etc, it could be a gift to someone waiting for employment,retiree, u can build yr biz plan from it yourself.

What is the cost of the complete module?

Serious thread with hilarious contributions..

@OP, the part about keeping the man from those "silly girls" gives you away; the focus should be on having a successful relationship with your husband. Don't start suspecting your man from day 1.

Just some ideas to support your efforts:

- You actually just started at a school where you don't graduate!
- Marriage is hard work, in fact lots and lots of hard work, day in day out!
- It takes more than s*x to keep a man!
- Know and understand the man you married, you cannot change him!
- You can't stop a man from cheating but you can help him keep to his vows by being his friend.
- Men have conscience too, you get better results appealing to their conscience than criticising them.
- Let him be the head of the house, it is his natural role, any contest will start WW3
- Maintain your swag, the vessel must continue to attract, men live by sight most of the time.
- Learn to communicate, do not attack the man; how we see an issue is always the problem.
- Stay positive, be thankful everyday, life is good even with all the challenges

The man has his roles too but that would be for another thread.

Please tell your friend not bring curse upon his head, he should be proud of his father for all he has done. There is so much blessing in that and the rewards can be so huge "his net will get torn" to contain them.

Children of nowadays!

AjanleKoko:



Everybody doesn't want to be Bill Gates. Right. But everybody wants to work in oil company




LOL.
What's there to be bitter about?
It's not like OP is in the oil company yet, he's just trying to 'break in'. Once he's able to 'break in', then I can start my jealousy trip, abi?

Not sure how you concluded that everybody wants to work in an oil company but there are so many threads here on other endeavors (poultry, fishery, palm oil, Forex trading, etc). Too many threads that are equally beneficial, I actually look forward to seeing one on how to be a politician in Nigeria!

Can't fault your judgement, only trying to get you to take a broader look at issues.

AjanleKoko:

Trying to make some sense out of your abbreviated jargon, but . . . why did he study petroleum engineering in the first place? Or was he chosen like Mary to bear Jesus?

It's no rocket science to explain why anyone would want to study petroleum engineering in Nigeria. In any case, even Microbiology and Fisheries grads are also trying to get into oil companies.

Go easy! Everybody is not all the same and wont all be Bill Gates, life is a journey for all of us and our destinations differs. Nobody should be criticized for having a legitimate desire.

We will support you if you open a thread to support what you are preaching here.

dsypha: hehe, dis one dat everybody wan work for oil company!!! pls how about us dat are reading Industrial Chemistry any hope?

Always be hopeful, what class of degree did you make? When and where did you graduate from? My friend heads a Lab in one of the majors and he mentioned that they are looking to fill some contractor positions.

You can retrain and get a PGD in Pet Eng or Chem Eng to give you opportunity into core Pet Eng or work as a Process Engr in subsurface areas. Probably even as a drilling rep or in HES..limitless opportunities.

Few extra tips:

- You can get into an oil coy even with a 2.2
- Aside your qualification, strong networking skills (not necessarily based on ethnic links) will get you in faster and ahead of performance at interviews. I already assumed that the applicant is smart (not paper qualified).
- Get your applications into any of the companies you would like to work with, an open application is fine. Companies file them for a year, so make plan to update on annual basis till you get an opportunity.
- Best way to get in might come small, take up contractor positions. Tough route but more financially rewarding on the short term, you will break out with focus and prayers.

Somebody need to advise on how to get the guy into a conversation, he clams up and wont talk for a week, she wrote. How then will issues be resolved if the two cannot sit down to iron out the grey stuffs?

@okine4real, 4200 seedlings is small, small for big impact that I seek but not a bad place to start.

Yeah, I had to buy the land and it was not that cheap back then. You don't want to lease land for a long term project simply for economic reasons and also because the owner can get greedy.

We are using chemical too but don't really like the idea, I need the land for some other uses that forbids chemicals.

okine4real: @MANGAM i love your nursery, i think you are doing just well. you really got lots of nursery.. I think you should even start your own NIFOR, start selling palm nurseries, i believe you would make lots of money.

@igbonla your palms are nice too, also start your own NIFOR, i think you guys can make lots of money ohh. make una nor waste una talent ohh.

a word of advice for MANGAM and IGBONLA, dont be in a haste transplanting your palm, you can let them grow well in there nursery stage very well. If they grow very well in the nursery stage, by the time you transplant them, grass cutter or any other rodent would not come eat them again, that was while i said in some of mine previous post, that if you go to benin NIFOR to buy palm nursery, they would sell to you, one week palm nursery because a lot of people are always coming to buy there palm nursery, even the picture of MANGAM and IGBONLA palm nursery is 5 times bigger than what is obtainable from Benin NIFOR, Also that was while i said they should buy from the other man that is in Delta, because his palms are about a year old. back to the topic.

you guys are doing good job, as for me, am still trying to buy more lands, so i can transfer, the thousands of palms they planted for me on 13 plots of land. i have already transplanted some before, i used 20 feet spacing because i dont have much lands. i just bought 6 and half plots again of 100 by 100 feet each. so i would be transplanting again soon. I dont have pics yet because i have not traveled and i dont even like traveling self. but would update you guys soonest.


Regards

Thanks for the compliments, better to let NIFOR be NIFOR oh.

Actually, with respect to when to transplant, you have to chose the evil you want to deal with. I did the planting at the right time that I wanted to do it; nursing about 4,200 seedlings in a closed separate land while maintaining the permanent field site in preparation for planting was costing too much.
The grasscutters beat me to it because I was distracted in the clearing of the land especially because of the rains. With frequent clearing when due, it will be difficult for the animals too show up. This farm is 80 acres and it is no joke clearing it every 3 months.
But yes, it is a good idea to grow the seedlings up to a particular point before planting them in the field. And you should not wait too long so the roots are not too stressed when you remove them for transplanting.

MANGAM: Wow ur palms ar nice and well nursed. Sorry for d grasscutters and I agree wit u is quite an xpensive venture. God will see us thru. Where is ur farm located?

Thanks, the farm is in Osun state.