gaius01:


Sir with all due respect, marrying such lady is not a problem if only She can come to Nigeria to marry and stay, but you going up there that implies you will be short to some right as a man. This lady is OK financial and educationally and marrying her you can't control anything about her. Beside she woñt have the moral an average Nigeria girls .

Which one is morals Nigeria girls have? Morals abi pretense. You know that generally we are a very pretentious people that carry religion on our heads but threat our fellow human being badly.

Op marry your level, if she is too much for you find your size or upgrade above her standards. Don't go and marry a woman that her parents has moulded and invested to be the best she can be and you want to suppress her.

You sound like you are already intimidated. Abeg leave the lady and find your level.

BabbanBura:


Its obvious you are ignorant of HIV, you can still make your point without given false information

Sweetheart HPV human papilloma virus not HIV.

For other posters blaming her, cheating is not ordinary cheating. It's shows following.
Lack of self respect
Lack of spousal respect
Lack of respect for your children
Loss of loyalty and trust
Betrayal
More than 2 people has now become 1
Illegal cos it's a breach in contract.
No fear of God
Stress trying to maintain to secrecy
Loss of finance
Waste of time (get a hobby and spend time with kids)
Reduced longevity

People the time you use to chase after side chick and side boys use it and invest in yourself.
Learn craft,
Learn new language
Make more money,
Visit countries and travel,
Enjoy this blessed earth God has given us.
Spend time with kids, siblings even parents
Visit orphanages
Play games and sports
Learn a skill

There is too much to get out of life that it's even a sin to me not to.

Why spend 5 mind chasing skirts and young blood that isn't happiness.

Intimacy with anybody? Don't u guys get irritated?

Op.....your marriage ended the moment your husband decided to cheat.The why, how and wetin happen isn't an issue. He had a choice.

He infected you meaning he has no love and regard for himself therefore none for you and the kids. Infidelity kills.

You guys can take a step back and build things again if he is truly remorseful and you can forgive him.

What you did for the meantime isn't wrong. If you die cos of STD who would raise your kids?

Remember, all STD can't be prevented by condoms. The deadly and currently rampaging HPV virus can be gotten from pubic hairs sef. It's the main cause of cervical cancer. Cervical cancer has no cure. Hepatitis B and D are sexually transmitted through ordinary kiss and they are killers.

So if he is truly repentant...then forgive.

The most important things in marriage is loyalty and trust. Otherwise you are in the typical Nigerian marriage.

How a woman dresses is not excuse for rape.

Would you blame a rich man for being robbed?

Mudley313:
Abeg, I need some advice concerning this matter

Me and my wife just quarreled because her mother asked for our only daughter who is two and half to sleep at her place and I said NO because I was not too comfortable with the idea. My wife is an only daughter and the mother is single with no husband or boyfriend. We give her all the time she wants alone with our child but she just seems obsessed with having her alone for a sleepover and my body no catch dat one. Her reason is she wants to bond more and she was very close with her own garandma blah, blah, blah. But this woman has been very manipulative in me and her daughters relationship in the past because they're abnormally close. Although she has pipped down a bit, I just don't want to create an opening for her to start that with my own daughter cos why would she insist for an all-night? what is wrong with spending time during the day time? what's so special about night time? Is it just to be able to have total control?

Anyway, I go appreciate una feedback and advice well well if anyone here have experienced such before and I don't want to come out looking like I'm overreacting

P.S. By the way, my wife na oyinbo, so I just wanna gather a proper naija perspective on the matter. Thank you in advance!

Hope this isn't coming late. You don't have to let your girl have a sleepover without a supervising parent. With all the madness, sick stories and psychos out there. She still too young and can't defend herself. You don't know the other occupants of her grandmother house and what they can do.

As for me my kids ain't sleeping over anywhere without a parent till the oldest one is 10 years old and they must not be alone.

Hello house please I really need freelance data entry or administrative jobs. Please outsource your excess projects to me. Thanks a lot.

Wow..... thank God I successfully breastfed exclusively for 5 months and 2 week's before external influences interrupted it.

I have just finished EBF my second for 6 months without water.

Sure it got super easy and I will do it over and over again.

speak2me2015:
There is this prejudice people have against nurses.
People should read the story line by line, comprehend it before commenting.
I know there are some bad eggs in every profession.
I have gone through your story and the only thing you mentioned was when the nurses asked for your child's folder. And this is for proper documentation.
I read where you said that the child had only one hour to live. How did you know the number of hours that your child had to live?
Where were you when the bleeding started? Why didn't you take the child to the hospital when the case was not serious?
Am sure you were running from taking your responsibility as a man waiting for the worst time so that you can vent your frustration on the profession.
As long as I am concern you are just saying this to get sympathy.
Wake up pls

Obviously u re not a medical personnel if u re u must be a fraud. Infant bleeding through the navel is usually as a result of faulty cord clamp. Considering there are now lots of fakes in the market.

An infant can bleed out. It's very life threatening. Didn't u read where she write that baby required transfusion later.

I don't know how she addressed the nurses but I won't blame her either. She must have been distraught.

Madam OP, I understand u have to work in another town, u can't uproot ur kids and urself cos a man can't stay without sex. YOLO. If u have to emotionally or physically detach to live thAt one life do it.

Everybody come life for himself.

For the side chic.....there is nothing u can do. She is living her life too.

nefertitiram:


Madam honestwife,

Contact afia's husband for advice. You should have taken a video of her naked and make copies. Send her a copy and threaten to expose her to her fiance and the whole world if she doesn't leave your husband alone. Well, that one done pass.

If it were me, walahi I will not think twice. Chat her up, on watsapp, confront her with your evidence, screen grab the chat and send to her fiance on watsapp and beg him to ask her to leave your husband alone.

Better still post her Instagram handle here, let us help you humiliate the life out of the she -goat.

As for your husband, na you cause am. How can you leave a man to get transferred out of state? Are you a learner?

When my husband was transferred from Lagos to Biafra, I followed him bumper to bumper to avoid stories that touch. Imagine cold night, the man will turn around and nothing to hold on to! God forbid bad tin!

Will you keep following ur husband bumper to bumper to work, to the car wash, to every occasion? If he wants to cheat he will. Live ur life

For nairalanders that lost their loved ones in that crash, accept my heartfelt condolence. I pray it's easier for you to bear. It's so sad.

No no no no
No no no no no
No no no no no no
Noooooooooo not Glenn

clans:
I don't know if I would consider this as my worst punishment but back in jss3 during those crazy Saturday morning manual labor, one female none perfect called myself and a group of junior girls to go sweep a class where they would hold their adventist fellowship, na so I jejely dey go till the headboy asked us why we weren't heading towards the assembly ground for the manual labour.
We were like senior so so so sent us. Thinking that as per they were mates and it's religious inclined he would let us be, but no he ordered us straight to the Labour ground, by myself I ran back to the hostel to tell the senior what happened and that she should accompany us, but she was like I would tell her when the headboy became her senior, I so much hated getting into this seniority stuff, but who born me not to obey the headboy, so I went for manual labor.
On getting back later in the evening, I heard jane doe move to the quadrangle. Na so this senior being insult my generation come begin flog me upon frog jumping.
I got to my boiling point, stood up (I was quite bigger than her) took the cane from get broke it in front of her and said " senior so so so, you're feeling like someone that has authority abi? Why didn't you have the liver to challenge the headboy? If you ever repeat this rubbish with me again, you won't like what would happen "
By that time senior girls done full the quad, everyone was just watching amazed, I dusted my knee, went straight to my bunk and dozed off, then the rumor went around school that I was possessed with the evil spirit and I was their queen, but who cares I got immunity till I went home for my junior waec holiday.

N.W.A.N.N E easy with the story nah.

Thanks Amis, giftygirl and DBard. I am not watching my weight and eat all day, even at midnight. My milk flows well, my baby practically lives on my bosom during the day and I wake up every 2-3 hours for night feeds.

I was getting worried cos baby seems skinny, but met with my doctor yesterday who told me that bottle fed babies get chubby earlier than breastfed babies.

@giftygirl... Congratulations on your new baby and thanks for taking the time to contribute. I don't really understand your post. When did your older kids start getting chubby? I don't give water at all. Do you? About the poop, my doctor says there is not much poop to poop that is why but I should help by stimulating the anus. I didn't have to eventually. Exercise ie bicycle movement of legs and tummy massage with warm water compress to tummy helped. The poop has always been soft. I take at least 4 liters of water per day including pap and oat meal no milk though cos it constipates me.

@dBard I will check the weight at 10 weeks immunization thanks.

dBard:
Kudos to you for your decision.
Just want to add a couple of tins:
There's a general misconception about the growth rate of exclusively breastfed babies as compared to others. It's bin my experience, contrary to views, breastfed babies do turn out bigger and definitely healthier than the others.
Development also is said to be better, though unproven, probably cos of d increased bonding between mother and child.
It may also help regularize ur feeding earlier as d child falls into your rhythm much faster.

Breast tip pain simply indicates that you're doing it wrong. Baby suckling on ur tips alone will traumatize it and cause pain.
In Suckling, the nipples AND areola should all be in d babies mouth. This way, the pressure is less, trauma is less and u feel better.

Also, exclusive doesn't necessarily mean it always has to b suckling. There's room for expressed breast milk (with cup n spoon of course).

Constipation may occasionally occur...a simple soap n water finger poke does d trick at times but preferably, see a certified medical practitioner.

Peace

Please when do breastfed babies start to add weight as in get chubby? My baby was still 4.1 at 6 weeks

Thank you amis, your advice was very helpful

Thank you Blade 21, temmy and teeboo.

Please mums that did the exclusive Breastfeeding how did you help relieve your babies discomfort especially when they were making the whole pooping effort and straining hard. I am on day 11 of another "no poop ".

@mmotimo... You are right about some mums gaining extra weight after Breastfeeding. I don't think exclusive Breastfeeding is overrated even though we are still getting more information on this. Apart from the nutritional and health benefits and weight loss, exclusive Breastfeeding helps mums internal female parts return to pre pregnancy conditions, EBF also encourages bonding and provides opportunity to spend time with child, learn baby's new facial expressions, new language etc.
About supplementing with formula, I think it does more harm than good to very young infants. Considering the production process, preservatives and our market that attracts fake goods. I was told by my doctor that there are some food additives present in formula that interfere with some important nutrients in breast milk when combined thereby reducing the efficacy of either on their own. So I think it is better to use a breast pump as advised by amis and gracious as supplement.

Personally I am gonna skip on the breast pump till it is really necessary cos I am a bit selfish and want to be the only one to feed my baby.

Thank you onegai, cococandy and trypai. I don't have a schedule for feeding baby, baby eats anytime anywhere. I don't let baby sleep over 4 hours without feeding. My consolations are the over soaked diapers and the hyperactivity.

For those that exclusively breastfed without water what was the longest time that your baby went without pooping.

I made sure I didn't buy feeding bottle set to strengthen my resolve and I am hoping that I won't need to express fortunately I am a work from home mum.

And I am female.

Another observation, in the 7 weeks thanks to God Almighty my baby has no cold, catarrh or congestion even though I had terrible cough and cold in my last two weeks before delivery and 3 weeks postpartum. And I have lost 12 kg without moving an inch.

Hello mums, new mums, experienced mums and expectant mums.

I am a first time mum of 7 weeks and I am practising Exclusive Breastfeeding (EBF). The benefits of exclusive Breastfeeding cannot be over emphasised but there isn't much discussion on the challenges not to talk of the lack of support, discouragement, criticisms, temptations mothers face.

Exclusive Breastfeeding is giving an infant breast milk alone as it's food. Simply put
Breast milk + x = food for infant
Where x = nothing, nada, nihil, rien, zilch. Though I think the occasional soap water consumed at Bath time can be overlooked.

I am trying to breastfeed exclusively for 6 months (God help me) as advised.... It hasn't been easy.
MY CHALLENGES
Breastfeeding on demand to waking up at night to feed.
Rushed personal hours (even bathroom round is rushed)
Nipples ache sometimes
The will to refrain from comparing him with other babies his age
Every day threat from my mother and mother in law about giving my baby formula or water when I am in bathroom.

CRITICISMS
Are you sure your breast milk is satisfying.
I don't think the quality is good.
Exclusive Breastfeeding is for mothers that have poor hygiene cos they can't keep bottles clean.
He looks sick
He is skinny, sister Ann's baby who is younger is very chubby.

EXPERIENCES
The longest my baby has stayed without pooping is 11 days. Now we are on the day 10, I pray he poops soon.
The clinging to his meal ticket.
I am still gathering more experience.
Massive support from hubby.


Please let's share experiences and solutions to challenges encountered. It would encourage people like myself that are almost tempted into feeding baby formula.

UPDATE

EBF 12 weeks and getting better.

PRESSURE
"Give your baby a little water"
"introduce dawa and soya bean"
"3 months is enough nah"
"are you still starving your baby?" Lol.... That was from dad.
"you don't look like someone on omugwo"

OBSERVATIONS /EXPERIENCE
It's all about baby, my bathroom rounds, food preparation, eating and sleep is per second since I am feeding on demand. Looking forward to uninterrupted 3 hours sleep.
Breastfeeding is making me loose lots of weight though I am eating more portions than ever.
Live savers: fruits, oats, pap, coconut and pregnacare Breastfeeding.
We have settled into a 2 week poo pattern
No catarrh, cough or diarrhoea.
My baby is very active, curious, growing strong.
Clingy
I spend lots of time with my baby.
Quick to notice any changes, development etc

HOPES/ PRAYERS
To continue till end of 6 months
To never get to experience colic, Diarrhoea, cough etc
That my baby remains strong and healthy.


Thumbs up to other EBF mothers.

redvektor:
the guy above me sha


see d prof head person like this go sabi give out carryover like say na money


anyway congratulations prof

Not at all. He is one of the best Lecturers. No bad belle for students and his colleagues. The picture didn't do justice he looks better and younger in person.

Still available

Had my blessing from God at 12:28. Baby boy was born in 5 push. The contractions hurt but the pushing stage didn't. Guess I was so focused on doing the right things and taking instructions. Barely felt any didn't even feel baby pushing down. Just knew that I had to push when contractions hit.

As soon as I heard baby cry, launched into praise and worship. Thanking God, Jehova, Jesus christ, virgin Mary and the nurses over and over again.

No tear but bruises. The nurses were professional and helpful.

Mum, dad, mother in law, aunties everyone travelled home to d East. Hunger wan kill me. Hubby brought only milo and milk. We are still learning how to carry baby. Still holding baby since he was placed in my arms by nurse cos we don't know how to lay him down.

Not complaining sha. Will catch some sleep when my family get here.

Thank you all for advice and support.

Hello universal101 please can you send unilag past questions to me. Thank you very much.

alexcharles007@yahoo.com.

God bless you.

Congratulations marygold and other mums. I thank God for you all. Praying for God's blessings and protection for me and my baby and everyone else on this thread.

Sold

Available

modath:
@keji3,

Congrats to our correct team mate, God bless you and the lil princess, the joy she has brought with her will be a permanent fixture in your home...

@pelupelu,

Congrats, God be with you & babies.

@Apple19,

Pele dearie, another strategy is to take the promethazine & lie down for a bit so it can digest & keep nausea at bay for some few hours...maybe you took it & were moving around This aint no walk in the park at all, .....E-Hug...

@lxvi8xii,

This your username na baba oo, & you asked too many questions at once, its overwhelming.

1.You dont need to be cool, just bring forth the baby.. your pain threshold determines your reactions.

2.Different hospitals, different methods.. mine advised infant formula given with cup&spoon so baby doesnt adapt to being bottled fed,till establishment. Moreover, that glucose thing is from the dinosaur era.

3.2 packs of each is ok, babies grow like weed in the first few months, so you graduate sizes.

4.Let that time time first, no cause for alarm.

5.Kegels..... google it..

6.Tummy fat is not the same as loose ab muscle from pregnancy, tummy fat is a result of over eating so watch your portions, loose ab muscles can be firmed up with medium intensity strength training... Jillian Michaels' DVDs (30 day shred, 6weeks,sixpacks, shred it with weight) & Billy Blanks Tae bo DVD range will have you in tip top shape in no time.

7.Any correct baby shop.

Thank you very much for your response. I appreciate.

Thank God, didn't know that this thread exists. Been reading everything. Thank you all for your contributions, advices and sharing your experiences. Very helpful indeed. I just stumbled on this thread yesterday and have been studying it from page 1. Hope I get to finish it before my due date.

So excited, scared, thrilled, impatient etc that I can't wait to ask questions. Over to senior mamas in the house.

1. How do I manage my cool in during labour. I am the type that panics easily?
I know there are no laid down rules but you guys should pray for me that I calm down enough to listen to instructions from the nurses.

2. My hospital requested only glucose for baby in case breast milk comes late. Hope that would do? I intend to do exclusive.

3. How many sleep suit and day clothes do I need at least for the first month. I have not checked baby sex so having a bit of a struggle picking out unisex clothes.


4. I am dreading the tear or cutting. God help me sha.
Please advice and experience from our senior mamas. How do I prevent, manage and take care of tears or episiotomy to prevent unnecessary pain and infection. (though I am really binding and casting against tearing).

5. How do I get to take care and firm up the koko after delivery. I have heard scary stories about things going horrible wrong down there. Abeg experience needed.

6. Tips on losing tummy fat and etc.

7. Please where can I get a bassinet here in lagos.

Thanks for anticipated response. I hardly get to sleep these days. A little frightened.

Congratulations to all mothers in the house. Can't wait to hold my bundle of joy. God help me to be a good mother.

Keji3:
My princess arrived dis afternoon......:#Godwin #teamjulydroppingitasedeyhot. Birth story loading

Congratulations. God bless you and your baby. And your hubby too.

R