Akamu! lol with plenty milk and sugar and Akara if you really want to speed it up,

Also, i heard that mixing evaporated milk with maltina and egg will fatten you up sharpish!

Then there's always the option of increasing your starch intake, bread, potatoes, yam, which are healthier than just consuming deep fried and ridiculously high in sugar and fat foods, ie going on an ice cream and cake diet isn't the best thing to do,

ahahahahahahaha *stop to take breath* ahahahahahahahahaha insecure much?

Men may have many reasons for not wanting their wives, for example, to work. More or less credible reasons such as wanting the wife to be with the children exclusively and raise them without house maids and whatnot, Not wanting your girlfriend to work because you are scared that someone will hit on her is ridiculous! serious inferiority complex, why would i want to be with a man that has those kinds of hangups, plus doesn't trust me again?

So what next? Get her a personal shopper and don't allow her go out again so that God-forbid somebody looks at her? haba!

I like Timaya but this is embarrassing!

After people will be wondering why Laws are a big joke in Nigeria, Somebody will "defile" their 16 year old neighbour (the age is for emphasis), and The Sun will carry it as front page news of horror and the man in question will be publicly humiliated (all right and proper), Then this old man will go and marry a child and it's okay abi? They will categorize one as a pedo and having relations with a minor, while Yerima is what? not to be persecuted because why?, mscheww all these double standards are what make progress static,

Who has seen the trailer for "My Fantasy" ? Tonto Dikeh is in it, lol comments?


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mRe8eYgZcHo

lol i know that, which is why i was asking for all stories nau, just not the horrible mother in laws one, aand concerning them, it's mainly hypothetical as to what you will do IF you had a terrible potential one, i never marry na, so i can worry about these things beforehand

Recently i watched two Naija movies that deal with the issue of mother-in-law's, Some are truly awful, while some get along with their child's spouse. How would you guys handle a mother-in-law that doesn't like you before, and during your marriage? Would you go ahead and marry the person despite their mother's obvious dislike, for instance? Do you ignore the woman in your matrimonial home?

Obinnaaaaa! ewww! that's just wrong!

obinna5000:

@m.i.
"Men Behind the Sun (1988)" also talks about the atrocities that Unit 731 committed during the second World War. " "Philosophy of a Knife" and "Men Behind the Sun" talk about the same thing and are both graphically violent.

True, true, haven't gotten round to Men Behind the sun though, still recovering, when i gather liver finish, i'll take it on , in the mean time, i just read about it, Things that went down in Unit 731, horrendous!

IIce, Looool @ Old Baby Benjamin, it wasn't even funny meyn, i used all my strength to look for the "beauty" and whatnot in it, lai lai, fear won!

As for Naija films that messed me up, Karashika, Blood Money and The Sign, not many movies manage to make me not want to sleep, these ones succeeded welllll!


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YoCdSd-uS4g

^^ That's a link for Philosophy of a knife, do NOT WATCH if you are a sensitive viewer, buh that is some of the most disturbing footage i have ever seen, that being said,

Hiii! could someone please help me with the recipe for egg-stew? you know, the kind they eat with boiled/fried yam/plantain? I have never gotten it right, and where i am, it's one of the few things that i can make with the ingredients available, i LOVE the stuff! and i am incredibly homesick

farochron:

I feel Jackie has bold legs and too short to beat Nadia. Could someone post the her full pix exposing her legs. She's pretty but I don't think she beats Nadia

ah ahn, Nadia's legs dey fear ko?

Gollywood ko? Kollywood ni? Somebody should really undertake a rebranding project and change this "Nollywood" concept into something more authentic and radically less copycattish, haba, let one person point to Nollywood on a map of Nigeria to me, what? can't? i thought so. Now stop the sillyness and call the film industry erm, erm, i no get name, which is why i said "somebody" should undertake a rebranding project

*intimidating sea Lion to penguins: I know where you live,

*hispanic penguins*: ye iss called laaaand!

Happy feet

Lovelace: avert your eyes, cuz i've been known to hypnotize!
Happy Feet

^_^ Happy feet rawks!

You pipo o! i dey greet! *knocks and asks loudly* "OUS?!" na who dey hia so?

Just lerrin ya'll know that i still dey this threat like dele o, jus lerrin you know in case of incasity!

Gamine? Goodass? hehe report back!

Don't ya'll just love these things that help you spot a Naija person from miles away?

Nadia is, beautiful, no doubt, but i prefer Jackie. Jackie is just, adorable! no homo, but she's like a beautiful doll ^_^ and she can actually act and talk like a human being.

My beef with Nadia starts with her diction, tha hell is worrying your tongue? and then her terrible acting. She manages to pull of one emotion barely successfully :whining and bitchin, but i gather that it's the way she is, so no need for too much acting, abi? and third, her features take style fat sha, i dunno, her face is just big anyhow, however, if she sat still at a particular angle and said nothing, i might chill small

ahahaha the man dey find second wife? make dem put me for top of list in case of incasity!

You guys should look at this thing from an objective point of view, without letting emotions get in the way nau. For me o, the whole "she didn't know who he was" argument is rather invalid. If she didn't know, the people around her did, and i hate to go there, but "family" can recognise the potential of wealth, even if we assume that she was 16 and wasn't thinking like that. Now, continuing with this whole she didn't know who he was, maybe the instant she met him, yes, but i bet that before the end of the day, she knew who he was. Also that whole argument is only logical if he saw her, proposed and she said yes, all in the span of 5 minutes. But it's on this same thread that i'm seeing that she did shakara for him for two years, uhm, isn't that enough time to think all the thoughts you want to think, taking into consideration everything about him? hmmm

That being said, on the sentimental side of things, i believe they really do care for each other, and it's not just a money thing. Just wanted to clear up this assumption that the money aspect is completely ridiculous- it is not.

I will be SO happy ehn! Not because i don't know how to cook o, but cuz i think it's really erm, sexy when a guy knows how to cook, thers something, different about a guys cooking, plus they look amazing doing it! another thing is that cooking is an art, the more talents my man has, the better! Only one thing will need to be sorted out though, we go draw timetable for kitchen use!

Meyn Iice i was a victim! i don't think i'd ever bothered with a Nic Cage movie before that, he has those basset hound eyes that are depressing, aaaaand he just fails to raise any sort of excitement, i watched that one by mistake, there was nothing else on at that time at the cinema, punishment for impatience! never again!

Aaah don't get me wrong o, I LOVE Sweeny Todd, like unhealthily, see i adore Johnny, and the chick too, she played Belatrix in the HP movies, yes? I love the lighting of the film, the characters, everything!! lol, and the disturbingness only adds to it, just like Lemony Snickett: a tale of unfortunate events, which has something creepy about it that i just can't put my finger on,

ooh and while we are on movies that shouldn't be freaky but are, The Curious Case of Benjamin button creeps me out properly! even if my friend insists it's a very charming movie, *snort!*

iice:

It's disturbing how the Art of War 2 ever saw the light of day

IICE!!! lmaoooo! mean!

the same can be said for The Knowing imho, i'm not one to make a fuss, buh i seriously considered asking for a refund after watching it. Nonsense and ingredients! *hisses with aplomb*

Here, it's a piece of chicken and green tea. An omlette occasionally, or Muesli wiv yogurt or skim milk, i'm not really hungry for breakfast, and i avoid carbohydrates which is why bread, for instance is a no no, makes me mad hungry before lunch time!

When i'm in Naija shaaa, whosai? go and tell my mother you will not eat her full egg and bread plus all the jara, not to mention that Akara is easily available, that ogbono soup you cooked yesterday nko? or popsi's banga soup? when i dey naija i no get rule o!

muauhahaha but mustard is delishhhh! Dijon for when you want a bit of tang, and straight up english when you feel like you have liver, put that ish on some chicken and get ready to cry!!!, okay, so maybe i have an unhealthy affinity for the stuff, but mix that bad boy with some chilli ketchup and angels burst into song!,

*thinks to self, abi there is chicken in the fridge sef, make i waka go, *

For me, it's not the gore that makes a film disturbing. It's the psychological aspect of it that genuinely frightens, So all those limb flying, blood spewing ones are not the criteria for a movie being disturbing for me,

Now, The Omen is hands down the most disturbing thing ever!

Silence of the Lambs

Sweeny Todd, the Demon Barber of Fleet Street, even if it's supposedly a light hearted musical, suure!

American Psycho, seriously?

As far as books go, Stephen King's Pet Sematary is also deeply disturbing,

As far as recent ones go, The Unborn and The Orphan are also unsettling, The Japanese version of Dark water is also rather eerie.

and the MEGA disturbing film of ever, The Philosophy of a knife. It's documentary-isn about Unit 731, Japanese experimentation on human beings, puts Hitlers camps to shame, now THAT was a disturbing movie, no watch am if you sensitive!

Constantine, Stigmata and the Exorsist, religious themed ones get me every time!

Have the first pair, buh with a lower platform, cannot wait for spring!

For the love of shoes!

I saw one of his interviews very very recently, so i just "discovered" this delightful individual. See, that first day, i laughed long and hard. I laughed myself to tears over his affinity for speaking in exclamations, over the theatrical nature of his speech in general.

However, i've had time to review his case objectively, and you know what? No, he is not a bumbling idiot. Yes, the man has an advanced case of an overdeveloped vocabulary and a misplaced sense of proper application, but he makes valid points. If you shave away all his big big grammer, he is not just mumbling for the sake of it, unlike many others who may communicate in severe lay man's terms, and yet make absolutely no contribution to anything. Make una pity am, it's not his fault. I think it has just become a natural way for him to express his opinions, and knowing ALL these mighty and very powerful words he knows, he finds it difficult to "un-know" them, because to him, they express his ideas just right.

That being said, the man fails to communicate. He may make points that are evident to him and fellow "gramarians" but for the most part, his audience is lost, and that equals failing epically at "communication",

Nothin' spoil sha, very entertaining character, just take it easy on him, lol

As for the people trying to terrorize Jakumo and Kosovo, take una time o! Jakumo's challenge that had me clapping my hands in glee so? My first time reading anything by him and kai e sweet to read, if you don't understand the (quite concise, btw) reply, then just jejely move on and don't be accusing him of random unconnected things, kabisa!

LWKMD!!! you guys are too funny! i love my Naija movies jor! the more of these "tabons", the better, ah, what other drama can i watch that will have me in tears from laughter?

Ini Edo managing to be spectacularly bush even if i desperately want to believe she's classier than that,

Nonso Diobi forever on the verge of tears and acting like a spoilt brat,

hearing the WIND rustling the mic,

seeing the aforementioned fluffy mic hanging over Oge Okoye's head as her words are lost in the background noise,

everybody sweating like they have been running because they are using million watt lights in the confines of a wardrobe and apparently handkerchief and powder are too complex to understand,

plot lines that make no sense whatsoever and are completely disjointed, i swear i saw someone get shot, and then she was in the next scene as if i hallucinated it,

the fact that there is no such genre as "romantic comedy". Say the truth and shame the devil, have you ever watched a love story that wasn't catastrophic? Someone is always hating someone, doing juju, dying, or struggling. There is no such concept as "uncomplicated", nothin spoil sha, cuz i wouldn't watch ^_^,

evil mother in laws,

randy lecturers/employers,

orange sellers with attitude problem,

hideous boutiques,

unnecessary long pointless scenes of somebody lamenting, of somebody driving, of people chasing each other around palm trees, i'm talking 5 minutes of this! haba!

Actresses rocking the same clothes in more than one movie, na bring cloth as you come o!

You are completely justified in your criticism of every single bit of the movie, from cast to wardrobe to plot and location, and yet you are still watching, was watching "Bandit Queen" today, kai i was annoyed throughout the thing, i wanted to slap someobody!

Unnecessary random grammar, metaphors and so forth, ref: This movie with er, Ramsey Noah, Olu Jacobs, Stephanie Okereke and Nadia Buari, where he was a prince, every line na poem!

Olu Jacobs must knack grammar

Nkiru Silvanus must be miserable

Police stations always look the same, abi dem sign contract with one?

Actors that do not even pretend to fit the role, Lord knows i've seen more than one questionable billionaire or "prof" or Doctor

Everlasting hair style and manicure, even when the chick has become destitute and everything o! she will be rockin acrylic abi gel nails,

No pregnancy goes without spiritual attack

Extended families never get along

The accident issue has been covered ^_^, *turn steering wheel wildly left and right* *open eyes very wide* *make sure the car is barely moving* *scream* *put hands on head or cover mouth* *zig-zag* *drive into bush or gutter* *run with hands on head to see profusely bleeding, often dead person in middle of road, whom you did not actually hit*


To God be the Glory, plus "the wicked shall never live" *bible verse*

WATCH OUT FOR PART TWO!

Coming soon + trailer that is essentially someones flashback of part 1, plus nothing new happens lai lai,

I Love me some Naija movies!

Looking for inspiration, so you guys should please be sweethearts and post pics and tips!!!

throttler:

dudu and funfun

white and black

come and go

carry go and bring come

here and there

***oops, i thought it was words and opposites***

LMAO!

Would you mind-Janet Jackson
Adore-Prince
Lets get it on-Marvin Gaye

, some songs were made for lovemakin' jare