Lol. Lovely advice frm u all, tnx. I guess i gats value wat i got before...nothing go happen jor. Mr Efemena, am good nw, adaptation things. But why some girls beefing me? At least am being honest. I'll improve.

Ucheosefoh:
Try to beat him in his own game whenever he is passing grab him too or anytime he wants to go out for something not serious enough stop and demand for sex or anything you can do with him infact na him go first tire

worth trying. Tnx mr.

This is serious my friends. I notice he gets sad whenever i protest or playfully push him away. I try to make it up to him sha. By pulling him back. Dt ok?

Is dis normal? I must not pass him front

baby_123: Virgin at 32. My dear you dont have cobwebs there but brick walls. With time you will relax and enjoy it. Just communicate more. Or are you concerned with him thinking you are not so pure? I feel you should be able to communicate with him and he will be able to pay attention to your body and what makes you get there. Communication is key. You also need time to know your body and tell him what you like and how you like it. Start by telling him to go easy and softly. Men tend to come on too strong sometimes and it takes all the feeling out. Women's bodies are tender, and should be touched tenderly till she asks for more.LOL

D guy break those bricks with so much zeal and determination dt wen he saw blood gushin out, he literally jumped abt d whole place while i was crying becos of pain LOL! Yes, more communication, i agree. And pls stop laughing at me o! My hubby sef too dey urge haba!, wan kill me for my mama. Anyway tnx

Toyinletstalk: Also @ poster, how often do you think about sex in a day? Think about it, day dream, imagine it, how you would want to be held and 'done', your thoughts sometimes, sets your whole body in motion. SEX is a beautiful thing and has a wonderful pleasure to go with.

hmmmmmmmm

Toyinletstalk:

All you have to do dear, is relax as much as possible. If you are too apprehensive about the sex you will pretty much not feel anything, pay attention to your body and surrender during intercourse. When you kiss focus on the kissing and relax your mind, let your husband touch all your sensitive part and let him triple the touch with all his, i don't want to sound too raw on here. Tell him to slow down, so you can pat attention to each part of your body and the sensation you will feel. Every part of the body has different sensations.

Yes mom!

nwababy: Don't worry dear with time you will start enjoying sex. Say from 3months. If you start it will take time before you start having that feeling. Just chilax

I hope so! keepin ma fingers crossed, exploring begins! tnx luv.

Efemena_xy: Na wa for nland's censor!

Who typed centre of gravity? When I meant G-sp0t?



My dear, you don't ever have to endure pain during sex - so stop all that talk about pain subsiding with time. It shouldn't happen in the first place!

I think how every woman responds to stimuli differs but there are things you can try to put you in the mood. How about making sure there are no distractions - so switch off your phones or put them on silent mode. You can also play you're favourite blues / relaxing music. Have a long soak in the bath with hubby with scented oils and candles and in the bath, let there be a lot of touching and exploring of each other's bodies. Go as far as you can dare, but no sex (it might be tough on your hubby to hold back, but encourage him to.)

When you both come out of the bath / shower, lead him to the bedroom and give him a nice, long, slow massage from top to bottom. While he lays face down on the bed, sit astride him, using your knees to grip him by the waist and then start massaging him slowly from neck to feet. (make sure you both do this without your clothes on). Then next get him to lie on his back and repeat the process. Take it in turns and let him also do the same for you. Encourage him to touch, handle and kiss your female spots while he encourages you to do the same with his body (don't want to be too graphic here).

The whole process (f0replay) could even take over an hour just to get you in the mood. When eventually you both get down to having sex, show him to go slow on you. Long, slow thrusts for as long as it takes to get you up there on cloud 9. It is a learning game and no one is born a sex pro - it just takes a lot of practice, and dedication to get better.

I hope this helps

I AM SOOOOOOOOO TRYING DIS ASAP! Ooshey!!!!

Efemena_xy: Na wa for nland's censor!

Who typed centre of gravity? When I meant G-sp0t?



My dear, you don't ever have to endure pain during sex - so stop all that talk about pain subsiding with time. It shouldn't happen in the first place!

I think how every woman responds to stimuli differs but there are things you can try to put you in the mood. How about making sure there are no distractions - so switch off your phones or put them on silent mode. You can also play you're favourite blues / relaxing music. Have a long soak in the bath with hubby with scented oils and candles and in the bath, let there be a lot of touching and exploring of each other's bodies. Go as far as you can dare, but no sex (it might be tough on your hubby to hold back, but encourage him to.)

When you both come out of the bath / shower, lead him to the bedroom and give him a nice, long, slow massage from top to bottom. While he lays face down on the bed, sit astride him, using your knees to grip him by the waist and then start massaging him slowly from neck to feet. (make sure you both do this without your clothes on). Then next get him to lie on his back and repeat the process. Take it in turns and let him also do the same for you. Encourage him to touch, handle and kiss your female spots while he encourages you to do the same with his body (don't want to be too graphic here).

The whole process (f0replay) could even take over an hour just to get you in the mood. When eventually you both get down to having sex, show him to go slow on you. Long, slow thrusts for as long as it takes to get you up there on cloud 9. It is a learning game and no one is born a sex pro - it just takes a lot of practice, and dedication to get better.

I hope this helps

I AM SOOOOOOOOO TRYING DIS ASAP! Ooshey!!!!

Woged2005:

You are right. Thanks for the correction. I was only trying to prepare @OP's mind not to bring 'SU's' mindset into the bedroom. There's time for everything. If she truly wants to enjoy s$x with her hubby, then she must be willing to be open and explore like millions of women who enjoy sex.

@OP, on the issue of size and pain, that's far from the cause. Doctors say every woman's 'body' adjust to the size of her partner's thing with time bc it's elastic and even accommodate the head of a baby. Moreover women lubricate during a good romantic 'play-play' & 'touch-touch' to prepare the 'place' for any size. However, try & use water-based lubricants sold in pharmacies in Nigeria. Also c.ondoms can cause pain during s.ex especially if they're not lubricated or dries out. One silly suggestion though is u may need to watch some s.ex movies with an open mind to learn more

sex movies, yes we watch 'lovers guide' togeda. SU tins, NEVER. i myt have married as a technical virgin, but am not a prude wrt sexual matters. av been there, done all except penetration. i even give my hubby MouthAction. dt is hw anti-SU i am. yes, we use ky jelly and no, he doesnt use condoms on me. i jst want those ooohs and aaaaahhs dt come wit love making, not faking it like av always done. am willing to explore and be open minded. for real. tnx for ur timely advice.

Efemena_xy:

Okay, good to know you aren't circumcised - was worried for you regarding that.

I think the pain you might be feeling during sex.ua.l inter-c0urse with your hubby maybe due to the fact that you've not been 'excited' enough through f0replay. When the female is sex.ually ar0used, her body tends to naturally lubricate itself, hence the 'wetness' we feel down there. This then makes penetr@tion easier.

So two things here: First of all, your hubby needs to learn the act of pleasuring you / up his game with regards to f0replay. Secondly, to prevent any tears or abrasiveness during penetration, you should use some water-based lubrication like baby oil. Rub some on his manhood and on your v@gin@ so that when he enters you, it'll be smooth and painless.

Sex, like most things in life, only gets better with practise. There are a lot of self-help books and videos you can get these days from the internet. Both of you should experiment to find out where your "center of gravity" it. Once you find it, you will reach org@sm during sex. Also try adopting different positions, but for each one, ask him to go really slowly and easy. For example, you could try asking your husband to lie back on the bed while you sit on top him. This way, you're in total control of how deep he enters you and you can go as far down on him as you feel comfortable for. For other positions, say missionary or the d0ggy style, let him know if it hurts so he can stop. Pain during sex can be uncomfortable so I totally understand where you're coming from - that is why you must communicate with him my dear, as men aren't mind readers.

It is well.

tnx so much efe, for understandin my plight. i get very very wet, dripping actually, wen touched. we use ky jelly for lubrication, to make entry smoother. am sure i feel him hitting my womb wen he thrusts deep. dt also brings pain. missionary position is best for me, but doggy is damn too deep but he understands wen i ask him to stop. DT PLEASURABLE FEELING is wat i crave nw. i believe dt wit time, d pain will subside, becos am new to dis. but d numbness is wat bothers me o. i pray it comes wit time. tnx so much for ur contribution

Efemena_xy: @OP, I'm going to ask you what no one here has dared to.

Were you circumcised as a child? Although widely discouraged, female circumcision is still practised in many tribes with the mindset that it discourages infidelity (from the woman).

Unfortunately, the emotional impact it has on women is huge. The cl.ito.ri.s is the power house for heightened sex.ual feelings and 0rg@sms and if you've had that bit of your anatomy taken off you, it explains the numbness you feel during f0replay and sex. I doubt if you'll ever be able to "peak" during sex.

no i wasnt circumcised. peakin during sex is sometin i myt never experience. dt i can manage, but this pain? cud it be becos my hubby is huge down there? btw am petite.

soul_glo: I think you should start by knowing your lady parts. Get a mirror and look down there and find all the parts. There are countless diagrams online. Find your clitoris. Try to find those sensations for yourself. I was like 7 when I found mine . I did not know what it was or really understand the feeling until I became an adult. I think after you explore your body and understand what makes you tick then you can have a better conversation with your husband about it. Good luck Sis. Don't be discouraged

i have never explored. it feels so odd. its like i dnt have a choice nw, do i? God help me o!

Woged2005: It's ur mindset or some phobia u had abt s*ex. Maybe as a teenager u're trained to believe that s*ex is too dangerous for a girl, or a good girl shouldn't be touched by a boy in order to look saintly and holy. It got hard-wired into ur brain & shut down ur response system. Now u're paying d price. U've to unwind that & become more open with ur hubby. S*ex is very canal & sometime 'dirty'. There's nothing holy abt it. It takes an open-minded woman to take the gross, silly stuff that goes on in bed btw a man & woman...u're almost like a wh*ore to ur man & yet don't feel disrespected. I'm being real.

u are very correct. i was strict abt sex, nw am paying d price. but i dnt regret keepin my virginity till marriage, i jst wanna let loose NOW

bluuu: does ur hubby touch u in d right places? or maybe u should see a counsellor/doctor.discuss with ur hubby abt it

u are right. i just fear, i want to enjoy sex wit my hubby. will dt EVER happen?

baralatie:
the lie u just told is the problem?
U av been wit numerovs men!
2nd u claim u married as a virgin for 3 years!
Clean up 1st and u'l see changes!

My being wit numerous men mean i dated without sex, kissing and every oda tin apart frm sex. i tot i wud feel sometin if i had sex first, so i waited until my weddin nite. no improvement. Also, av been married for 3 wks not 3 yrs.

no sensations pls help! why dnt i feel pleasurable sensations wen being kissed, caressed or made luv to? Wit ALL d men av been wit, same problem.Just starked numbness. Never ever felt it, even now dt am married. I was a virgin until my weddin nite, 3 wks ago. cud dt be reason? !I am 32 yrs old. I pretend to feel, so hubby wont feel like he is not doin well, but nw he suspects. WAT IS WRONG WIT ME?

Hello people. i have a problem dt has been plaguing me for yrs. i wasnt too sure until nw. whenever a woman is kissed or caressed at her intimate areas, she shud feel pleasurable sensations right? well i dnt. at all at all. just numb. dead. nothing. i have received MouthAction countless number of times frm different men, experts but NOTHING, no sensations at all. i tot it was becos i was a virgin dts y i cudnt feel so i waited and hoped dt wen i get penetrated, i wud feel. i got married 3 wks ago, been touched, kissed, caressed and made luv to, HEAVILY, but still nothin. i always pretend to oooh and aaaah so as not to disappoint hubby. nw he knws. he is askin me dt weneva we make luv, i dnt respond to his strokes and thrusts. THIS IS TRUE. Bottom line, i might be frigid. DOCTORS PLS WAT IS WRONG WIT ME? i am not normal. #sad#

l am gettin married tomorrow december 7th. i feel so nervous already, facing the crowd. GOD HELP ME!!!

Yeah he's faithful, tho he gets too much attention from other girls. We gettin married soon. Sometimes wen am angry wit him, he just needs to apologise and smile. Lookin at his face melts my heart instantly. His good looks again. I dnt know why. Is this not vanity on my part?

Is it wrong to be attracted to and want to marry a guy becos of not only the good qualities he possesses but also becos of his good looks? I really dnt know how to phrase it. Is it ok to want to be wit someone becos his good looks trips u badly?

Hello friends. PLS THIS IS URGENT. Can anyone post a link by which i can download Ebenezer Obey's song, BABY MI JOWO. Pls treat as urgent. Tnx.

This one better na. A 99yr old grandfather impregnated a 26 yr old girl in my area and the family bought a big cow for the naming ceremony this saturday 28th september. D girl is willin to marry the old man.

fyneboi79: How many of them have you gotten for a start??12? 15?25? HO good!!

Guy, ur stew-pidity knows NO BOUNDS. Dt's all i'll say to u. Ciao!

ritababe: I love her so much, she is my role modern.
Good luck gene baby

:ono be only role MODERN, role ANCIENT nko?

Thank y.all for ur replies. I'm not a feminist. I believe in submission and he knows it. I'm not saying we wont be at loggerheads sometimes, and i am ready to do all i can to give him the respect he deserves as my head. Just hope he doesn't take advantage of this by misbehaving and not expectin me to talk becos i go talk. Its all abt sacrifice sha. Dt, i'm willing to adapt to. I dated graduates, relationships dt were full of grief. So its not abt d degree but d personality of d individual. This guy is not perfect, but he treats me right. I think dt's enof foundation to start sometin meaningful on. My happiness is wat counts.

Happy sunday to you all. I have a problem. There is this young man i just met 2yrs ago. I'm yoruba, he's delta by tribe. We've been just platonic friends but now he wants my hand in marriage. I am a graduate of OAU but he only stopped sch at sec sch. He attended a technical school later, learnt a skill in electricity. Workin now wit an ok salary. I feel no qualms abt marrying this guy becos he's so humble, very hardworkin and selfless, ALWAYS ready to put people's interest ahead of his own. He has a positively dangerous sense of humor, cracks me up so badly lol. Plus, he's so so cute. Lol. We flow well. Problem is, people are talkin abt our educational differences and its gettin to me. I'm ok wit him but people, even my family feel we dont match. I luv him badly. MUST HE BE A GRADUATE TO BE MARRIAGEABLE? Please i need reasonable nature responses. Tnx.