I am not sure if I have read this one all wrong. Nigerian/Yoruba culture is so confusing. Why cant she just talk normally to me like an adult and tell the truth instead of playing stupid games.

OluwaOluwa:

I will try o

I am feeling better about it. As you have hinted, I do not need someone in my life like that anyway. I am worth more.

I have dealt with it well though. I just text her saying that she has a partner, yet she asks ME for gifts. She knows I have feelings for her...and that hurts.

I have said that I will always care about her very much, I will call her to wish her a happy birthday, but then after that...I will not be calling anymore.

If she is as I think she is...she will not care one bit.

...but I guess that says more about her than it does about me.

Onwards and upwards!

mstik: yep. Just move on

I will try o

mstik: Eyah, pele. You got tangled with the wrong lady. Not all ladies are like this

Tank you. I pray I have read her right.

If she really wanted me, she would have expressed her feelings clearly to me now? By telephone. She would have said, she would not have just hinted little things. I have made my feelings obvious many times, yet she has never opened up really.

Also she would not still have a partner?

Maybe I should not tink of her or the whole thing again.

OluwaOluwa: I met a Nigerian lady a while back in Nigeria. I was suspicious, but we got along very well. I liked her, she seemed to like me. I do not toast many women, but I tell her my feelings. She is on and off like a tap. She tell me that she wants me to return, that she loves me too. Then she says that she has a partner.

She has strung me along and strung me along and kept my hopes alive. I said that I may return, but I need time to think and plan. I needed to see if her intentions were honest and true. But she refuses to talk much on the phone. Only enough to keep my hopes alive.

Then she ask for gifts and money. All of a sudden I realise. She has been treating me like a mugu all along. She wants me sending her money while she has fun with her boyfriends.

I have kicked her from my life. But it still hurts now. She has no thoughts for me? No respect? Shah. To think I loved her an accepted her for who she is...or who I thought she was. It is a sad world when people treat each other like dis. I pity her.

Are all Nigerian women like this? Out for whatever they can get?

Please do not hammer me nairaland...I need god abi. I am feeling fragile.

I met a Nigerian lady a while back in Nigeria. I was suspicious, but we got along very well. I liked her, she seemed to like me. I do not toast many women, but I tell her my feelings. She is on and off like a tap. She tell me that she wants me to return, that she loves me too. Then she says that she has a partner that she does not want a future with me.

She has strung me along and strung me along and kept my hopes alive. I said that I may return, but I need time to think and plan. I needed to see if her intentions were honest and true. But she refuses to talk much on the phone. Only enough to keep my hopes alive.

Then she ask for gifts and money. All of a sudden I realise. She has been treating me like a mugu all along. She wants me sending her money while she has fun with her boyfriends.

I have kicked her from my life. But it still hurts now. She has no thoughts for me? No respect? Shah. To think I loved her an accepted her for who she is...or who I thought she was. It is a sad world when people treat each other like dis. I pity her.

Are all Nigerian women like this? Out for whatever they can get?

Winning is easy with enough money to burn!

anney: poor u!!!!

haha...clearly proving the opposite.

As if being money hungry and b*tchy is acceptable behaviour. And I bet you claim to be religious.

Maybe you should be saying poor me!

...it would depend if you have something to offer.

Money? Are you a renowned lover?

It would seem that most women would happily prove that they are nice and loving for the right price!!!!

...then again I am a bitter guy!

I think it is simple. Wish her a happy birthday give her all the messages and love that I can.

...if she mentions money at all...I will lay it out simple, "you can have a money gift if you want, all you have to do is ask for it".

If she says I want you to send me money, it will be clear. I will send her it and then never talk to her again.

Tings are okay.

I have another question.

About a year ago, I sent her some money. It was her birthday. I had spent my birthday with her and her family all made a big fuss celebrating it with me. I knew she and her family did not have a lot of money and I remembered her mentioning that noone had ever made that kind of fuss with her for her birthday. Aftee we relocated apart, I remembered this and transferred some cash to her on her birthday. She did not ask for it. I did it because I wanted her to feel special. I had feelings for her but this was seperate from that.

Now her birthday is coming up again and she is mentioning it. I really don't like it. To me the gift/money was kind of a one off, a thank you, based on what she had said. I am a little worried that she is expecting money again, and what would that prove...that she is stringing me along?

I think I should not send anything. Treat this like a test. Surely if she was only after the money and not me, she would push me out of her life quicker than you can say odabo. If she is serious, it would not matter.

What do people think?

What does Follybebe mean?

No we are not dating. I text her and apologised. She sounded really sad and upset when I called earlier in the week. The first thing she said was "When will you call" she sounded quite upset. Since then she has been cold and blocking my calls.

I text her and apologised for what I thought I had done and she flashed me. I talked to her and she was acting like normal, not very close or engaged with the conversation like she had been. She said "why would I be mad with you?".

Just when I thought we were getting somewhere, she starts talking to me like a pal again.

I cannot understand her. She is back and forth so quickly.

Maybe it is time to give up on it.

The whole thing was a bit of a pipe dream anyway, but I really liked her a lot.

Eya. Great! She is ignoring me now. Why are women so annoying!

I don't understand why she cant just tell me the issue so we can deal with it...instead of playing these stupid games.

Ohhh ok. I see. it is hard not living near her. I find it difficult not being able to read her daily.

I care about her very much and I like her a lot. But I do not want to bother her. I do not want to pester her daily when I know she has a busy life too.

She could have said something, if she wanted me to call her more, she could have just said 'I want you to call me everyday'. I cannot just guess how she feels.

When she says things like 'I will call you later' and then does not call, it makes me think that I am bothering her, that I am a nuisance.

I never intended to make her sad. I pray that she is not upset.

So I am good friends with a Nigerian lady...with it maybe leading to something more.

We live apart but we talk by phone. Everything was going well, I was sending her some sweet texts and it seemed like we were becoming comfortable talking and closer.

I did not call for a week or so because I was busy with work. I told her my phone was having problems. I last told her that I would call soon. When I did call she sounded down and sad. Like upset.

English is my first language, but when I asked what was up it sounded like she said 'when will you call'. I asked her to repeat and said that I did not understand, that I was confused. She seemed to make an excuse, that she was sleeping, and we ended the conversation.

Next day, I called her. She seemed very abrupt, like she didnt want to talk. I was a little disappointed and asked if she had been upset when I called the day before, she said 'I was busy' but sounded like she was making an excuse. She said 'I will call tomorrow'. She has often said this and then not returned the call. I was disappointed as I was looking forward to talking and said 'ok, odarro'. Before I could hang up she said 'your phone is working now abi'...as if to hint, I said 'yes'.



Have I upset her or something. Things were going so well, I dont get it.

Enegod: SMH

Eya

"The number you are calling is not available, please try again later"

All the time abi. I need to find another phone...I just want to see.

There was never and kind of relationship like that to be "dumped" from.

Lol...and "dumped" Seriously? We are both in our 20's. School children dump each other. Adults talk about things.

If she has just cut me off because she is too scared or cant be bothered to talk to me like an adult, then she is really not worth thinking about.

I didn't think she was that arrogant and immature.

ty-tymer:

Hmmm. Matters of the heart.... If any woman chooses to ignore you, it simply means she doesn't deserve you. Forget her.

Eyaaa. Well I thought we got on as friends if not as more.

I would like to know if she is choosing to ignore me or not. I will clearly forget her if this is the case! But it would be a shame to cut her off because I thought she is ignoring me (but it is just bad signal).

You understand?

Does anyone know what happens when you try and call a MTN number that has blocked you? Does it tell you that you have been blocked?

She only uses mobile and we live quite a distance apart.

I may try and use another mobile number to call her as a test.

I will leave her alone if she does not want to talk with me. Its just a little sad that she could not have just told me not to call her again rather than blocking my number and leaving me guessing.

A little rude and disrespectful if this is the case abi.

Had a bit of a small argument wit a lady friend.

I have been calling her two MTN numbers and 1 GLO.

The MTN numbers says "the number you are trying to call is not available, please try again later".

The GLO says "the number you are trying to call is switched off, please try again later".

This has happened before with bad signal. But it is a while since we have talked and I normally manage to get through to her eventually...now we have not spoken for weeks.

Always this message. I am wondering if she has blocked me abi. I cannot think that her phone is always busy/off!

What do people tink?

Sometimes I get "the MTN number is not available, please try again later"

Sometimes I get "the MTN number is switched off, please try again later"

I have not spoken to this person for a while...I get these messages EVERYtime.

Is it just bad service?

I am wondering if they have blocked me.

Does anyone know how you can tell if someone has blocked you using their MTN and GLO phones?

What happens if you try to call someone and they have blocked you?

Do you hear a message? What message do you hear? What does it say?

Ese o