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How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? - Family (2) - Nairaland

Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? (41940 Views)

How can I stop my wife from divorcing me? / How Can I Stop My Ex From Visiting My Matrimonial Home? / My Friend's Wife Keeps Disturbing Me For Money (2) (3) (4)

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Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by ImaIma1(f): 9:48pm On Apr 03, 2021
doggedfighter:


You go fear sharing formula grin grin grin grin grin


That one sounds like an entitled sibling. He knows how someone's money should be shared for the benefit of the whole family.

15 Likes 1 Share

Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by Tony142: 10:08pm On Apr 03, 2021
doggedfighter:


Did you even read the thread before writing this nonsense.

Is he seeking advice on how to spend his money that you are already sharing his money for him?

Where did you read that he abandoned his mother?
That you are talking about forgetting his source.
He won't regret anything if he switches off his phone but that's not the issue here.







No mind that boy, he is definitely a broke nigga in his family

5 Likes

Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by lecturer50(m): 10:12pm On Apr 03, 2021
ImaIma1:


Are you the only child?

If you resign to go and stay by her side, where will the money come from for the bills?

What have her relatives done for her except to drag you because you have a job?

Our African culture makes it frustrating for one family member to do well. He has to carry the weight of the whole family upon his shoulders and they won't appreciate it. Instead, they think it's their entitlement.

Someone is saying he should set up a provision store, another is saying he should send half of his salary. Is it that easy to set up a store like that? How will the sick mum run the store? When family members run it to the ground, they will come back and expect you to vomit out more money for another business.

Please keep helping your mum as much as you can. But quitting your job to go and take care of her is not a good move because money will be needed.

Ok
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by lecturer50(m): 10:14pm On Apr 03, 2021
Mindlog:


Based on her age and health status, I would suggest you and your siblings see to it that you get someone to stay with her to help prepare her meals, do her laundry , general cleaning and most importantly make sure she religiously adheres to her medication.

You know the financial strength of each of your siblings, do encourage them to contribute accordingly to support your mum's assisted living as it would help you all have the peace of mind knowing your mum is not alone and being cared for.

Alright
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by lecturer50(m): 10:16pm On Apr 03, 2021
NoToPile:



Your siblings are smart, some relatives are better handled with this method.


Whatever you do don't resign your job, that's their way ooo.

At worse you will move mama to live with you or your siblings.
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by lecturer50(m): 10:18pm On Apr 03, 2021
Klass99:


Your siblings are interesting and funny, I don't blame them at all.

But, what happens in an emergency where they need to be reached for a valid reason?

Can you bring your mum to your base to stay with you for some time and find good help to cook/care for her, while you are at work? That's if none of your siblings can accompany her

I am considering that.
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by lecturer50(m): 10:19pm On Apr 03, 2021
NoToPile:



Your siblings are smart, some relatives are better handled with this method.


Whatever you do don't resign your job, that's their way ooo.

At worse you will move mama to live with you or your siblings.

That is what I am looking at doing.
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by Klass99(f): 10:34pm On Apr 03, 2021
smiley

6 Likes 1 Share

Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by OmejeGuy(m): 10:38pm On Apr 03, 2021
OP don't be unfortunate please. Cut them off! Old age no get medicine ooo... When it's time, it's time.

Be clear, if it's 5k or 10k you can afford every month. Anyone that think it's not enough should add to it. Problem no dey finish and no matter what you do, she'll likely die b4 you. Death is inevitable. I wonder why they're manipulating you with it.

And if you think you can please toxic people, good luck!

2 Likes

Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by Zenithh: 10:50pm On Apr 03, 2021
Op congratulations on ur govt job. God is using u to help ur family in times of distress. Now listen and listen carefully...call ur siblings on phone and discuss on mamas health and discuss on how to bring her to d city to receive proper health care immediately at a general hospital in your city. Apart from old age related sickness..mamas health maybe dwindling because of loneliness. Bring her to ur place so that she can be seeing ur face and if possible employ someone who will be coming to keep her company when you're away at work...or if u have a serious gf,,,u can plead with her to also help mama out in cooking and taking care of her

Take ur mum away from the prying eyes of those village pple. Never u resign from that God given job. Thank God ur job is a govt job where u can squeeze out time to attend to mama unlike a private job. If possible ask for leave so that u can take care of mama in ur base...also by visiting the gen hospital with her.

I wish ur mum a quick recovery and I decree that she shall not die but live to declare the works of her maker..Amen

Pls let me know if u need further advise on this issue..God bless you

8 Likes

Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by Oizee(f): 10:55pm On Apr 03, 2021
lecturer50:


Guy stop typing what you don't know about me.

I know what I am doing for them.

I just need an advice, not a bad judgement from a person who believes he knows everything about me.

don't mind that guy, this your issue is synonymous to what's happening to me presently. I wish you well in making the right decisions.

most of the numbers on my blocked list are my family members.... I'm sick and tired of their never ending demands...
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by 1F30M4(f): 11:02pm On Apr 03, 2021
lecturer50:
Please house I need an advice.

Ever since I got a federal government job,

my relatives have been disturbing me for money.

There must always be an issue that involves money which they want me to solve.

Recently, my mom become sick.

They are threatening me that I would be held responsible if my mom dies,if I don't make sure she is cured.

But I have taken her to hospitals, and she is trying to recover.

I do this whenever I visit home since I am working in a state far from home.

Her health challenge is due to old age.

But today my uncle called me that I should resign, get back to the village and personally take care of my mom,

failure of which,if she dies, the whole family would hold me responsible for choosing job over my mom.

Can you imagine resigning your federal job to get to the village and start staying?

The calls, the demands, the attacks are getting too much for me.

Please should I just switch off my phone so that no one can contact me?

I just need advice?

Look dear, don't ever give in to the call to resign.. Even your ailing mum wouldn't urge you to do that, alwayss those onkuu agbayas ati awon ebi alainironu

You & your siblings should try and get a caregiver for mama, that way you're sure your mum is well taken care of.. Keep constant communication going.. Travel home anytime you can, same with your siblings, spend time with mama.. Orrr better still bring mama to yours, get a help that will assist mama all the time.. Mama can even be rotating from one of your siblings house to the another, whichever, y'all need to talk about it

Preferably, if mama can come stay with you or any of your siblings, you'd have taken away that power/right those relatives feel they have, they'll be sooo pissed haha I'll pay to see their reaction lol jk.. In the meantime, for you to have peace of mind, I suggest you change your line.. Only mama & her caregiver should know about it and make it clear that on no account should they give it out to anybody without your consent.
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by OmejeGuy(m): 11:06pm On Apr 03, 2021
Oizee:
don't mind that guy, this your issue is synonymous to what's happening to me presently. I wish you well in making the right decisions.

most of the numbers on my blocked list are my family members.... I'm sick and tired of their never ending demands...




My Dad and I never talk this 2021. He wants me to be financing my sister's education. Hostel rent, laptop, feeding allowance while he cruise his Sienna with his second wife.

I refused to be used this year. Cut off mode activated. "The boy is good" has sent a lot to the grave.

22 Likes

Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by lecturer50(m): 11:28pm On Apr 03, 2021
1F30M4:


Look dear, don't ever give in to the call to resign.. Even your ailing mum wouldn't urge you to do that, alwayss those onkuu agbayas ati awon ebi alainironu

You & your siblings should try and get a caregiver for mama, that way you're sure your mum is well taken care of.. Keep constant communication going.. Travel home anytime you can, same with your siblings, spend time with mama.. Orrr better still bring mama to yours, get a help that will assist mama all the time.. Mama can even be rotating from one of your siblings house to the another, whichever, y'all need to talk about it

Preferably, if mama can come stay with you or any of your siblings, you'd have taken away that power/right those relatives feel they have, they'll be sooo pissed haha I'll pay to see their reaction lol jk.. In the meantime, for you to have peace of mind, I suggest you change your line.. Only mama & her caregiver should know about it and make it clear that on no account should they give it out to anybody without your consent.

Ok.

Thank you.

1 Like

Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by lecturer50(m): 11:29pm On Apr 03, 2021
Oizee:
don't mind that guy, this your issue is synonymous to what's happening to me presently. I wish you well in making the right decisions.

most of the numbers on my blocked list are my family members.... I'm sick and tired of their never ending demands...



Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by jesmond3945: 12:21am On Apr 04, 2021
lecturer50:
Please house I need an advice.

Ever since I got a federal government job,

my relatives have been disturbing me for money.

There must always be an issue that involves money which they want me to solve.

Recently, my mom become sick.

They are threatening me that I would be held responsible if my mom dies,if I don't make sure she is cured.

But I have taken her to hospitals, and she is trying to recover.

I do this whenever I visit home since I am working in a state far from home.

Her health challenge is due to old age.

But today my uncle called me that I should resign, get back to the village and personally take care of my mom,

failure of which,if she dies, the whole family would hold me responsible for choosing job over my mom.

Can you imagine resigning your federal job to get to the village and start staying?

The calls, the demands, the attacks are getting too much for me.

Please should I just switch off my phone so that no one can contact me?

I just need advice?
That's village people for you, very manipulative and heavy dose of sense of entitlement.
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by Kettlecorn: 1:12am On Apr 04, 2021
OP, listen carefully O! This is how poverty in retirement gets perpetuated from one generation to another. This may sound harsh but it's the naked truth. Your mother did not plan for her retirement that's why she's in this situation. Many in her generation fell into that trap relying on their children for retirement becaue they did not not recognize that times were changing fast and did not realize that their children will move far away from home to wherever they can earn a better living. Our forefathers lived like that in the past because people lived all their lives in the village and farmed for a living so the entire extended family was around to take care of the elderly folks. But times have changed. Do not make the same mistake and be a burden to your own children in their retirement. You can break the cycle now.
I'm sure you're smart enough not to quit your job and go back to the village. Like many have said, bring your mum to where you are and take care of her with help from your siblings or hire a caretaker to look after her in the village. Insist on your siblings chipping in too becasue the finances you should be saving for your own retirement years is what you will be expending taking care of her. Are you married or have children? How can you move back to the village if you have children and jeopardize their future?

7 Likes

Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by TheCongo2: 1:21am On Apr 04, 2021
doggedfighter:


Very stupid post grin grin

He even drew monthly plans and percentages on someone's salary grin

If you're not wise, people will ruin you with responsibilities and before you realize it. Hmmm.

Lol.. can't stop laughing
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by jesmond3945: 7:40am On Apr 04, 2021
OmejeGuy:


My Dad and I never talk this 2021. He wants me to be financing my sister's education. Hostel rent, laptop, feeding allowance while he cruise his Sienna with his second wife.

I refused to be used this year. Cut off mode activated. "The boy is good" has sent a lot to the grave.
please do it if and only if you can. She is your blood.
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by Villagedude: 8:10am On Apr 04, 2021
If you can, take her to your location, (are you the only child?). 2 .Tell your uncle with all boldness you will not retire except he provides you a better job in d village grin grin.
Dm me if you don't know her real sickness

1 Like

Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by udemzyudex(m): 9:23am On Apr 04, 2021
funny, go ahead and resign naa.
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by Nobody: 9:24am On Apr 04, 2021
Change your sim card, or set some rules both hopefully if God bless you fully financially just dey help them

https://www.nairaland.com/6467806/live-tv-app-sale-solartv
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by Worksunlimited: 9:24am On Apr 04, 2021
lecturer50:
Please house I need an advice.

Ever since I got a federal government job,

my relatives have been disturbing me for money.

There must always be an issue that involves money which they want me to solve.

Recently, my mom become sick.

They are threatening me that I would be held responsible if my mom dies,if I don't make sure she is cured.

But I have taken her to hospitals, and she is trying to recover.

I do this whenever I visit home since I am working in a state far from home.

Her health challenge is due to old age.

But today my uncle called me that I should resign, get back to the village and personally take care of my mom,

failure of which,if she dies, the whole family would hold me responsible for choosing job over my mom.

Can you imagine resigning your federal job to get to the village and start staying?

The calls, the demands, the attacks are getting too much for me.

Please should I just switch off my phone so that no one can contact me?

I just need advice?

Better don't listen to that your uncle.. what's he doing as her brother?

Face your hustle, make sure you save money for yourself, while taking care of your mum..

If the disturbance too much block all the numbers of your relatives and contact your siblings..

Na who dem wan kill dem dey find
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by NoFucksToGive: 9:24am On Apr 04, 2021
[s]
lecturer50:
Please house I need an advice.

Ever since I got a federal government job,

my relatives have been disturbing me for money.

There must always be an issue that involves money which they want me to solve.

Recently, my mom become sick.

They are threatening me that I would be held responsible if my mom dies,if I don't make sure she is cured.

But I have taken her to hospitals, and she is trying to recover.

I do this whenever I visit home since I am working in a state far from home.

Her health challenge is due to old age.

But today my uncle called me that I should resign, get back to the village and personally take care of my mom,

failure of which,if she dies, the whole family would hold me responsible for choosing job over my mom.

Can you imagine resigning your federal job to get to the village and start staying?

The calls, the demands, the attacks are getting too much for me.

Please should I just switch off my phone so that no one can contact me?

I just need advice?
[/s]

Basically you are asking us how to be stupid ?

You are given opportunity to help instead of grasping you dey find who go follow you collect curse for head.

Kai what sort of person are you ?

Guy go to a room get your lubricant , sit down and rub one out to clear your head. you will calm down.
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by CapedBaldy: 9:25am On Apr 04, 2021
Ebuka78:


A river that forgets it source will surely runs dry. You have to help your mum, God gave you that job to support your family.


If it were your girlfriend, you would help her without thinking twice.

You can divide your salary into half, and give your sister to start a Saloon business/ become a hair stylist.

The next salary, you divide it and assist your brothers or brother to open a trade.

In 3 months time, there wouldn't be pressure on you to help the family. It is not good for one person to be rich in a family, let the rich one help others to get rich.

You should send 50% of your last month salary to sustain your mum.


You don't know what she passed through before birthing you. She would never tell you.

Switch of your cell phone and regret it for life.

Send her half of your salary for her health and remain blessed for life.
Did he tell you that he's rich cos he has a government job?

4 Likes

Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by udemzyudex(m): 9:25am On Apr 04, 2021
Ebuka78:


A river that forgets it source will surely runs dry. You have to help your mum, God gave you that job to support your family.


If it were your girlfriend, you would help her without thinking twice.

You can divide your salary into half, and give your sister to start a Saloon business/ become a hair stylist.

The next salary, you divide it and assist your brothers or brother to open a trade.

In 3 months time, there wouldn't be pressure on you to help the family. It is not good for one person to be rich in a family, let the rich one help others to get rich.

You should send 50% of your last month salary to sustain your mum.


You don't know what she passed through before birthing you. She would never tell you.

Switch of your cell phone and regret it for life.

Send her half of your salary for her health and remain blessed for life.

Did he say he is not he is not helping his mum?

I wonder how some of you read and understand things.

3 Likes

Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by Prechgold1180(m): 9:27am On Apr 04, 2021
lilvicky68:

Thumbs up.. family is everything
thumbs up keh as if problems Dey ever Dey finish
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by FatherOfJesus: 9:27am On Apr 04, 2021
Don’t allow relatives ruin you, they almost did that to me but somehow I got back to my feet.

Do the one your power can, don’t give them this impression that you are doing well. I started using this strategy and since then they usually find alternatives. I just make sure I send at least something to them every month.
You have a life to live, if you die for them, they will find a way to survive in your absence.

4 Likes

Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by MurderX: 9:28am On Apr 04, 2021
Get married, tell them you are now a family man. Everybody will leave you alone.
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by ictjobber: 9:29am On Apr 04, 2021
By saying NO

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