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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? (41144 Views)
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Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by Dharniel600(m): 9:51am On Apr 04, 2021 |
Do the one your power reach and enjoy life. Family problem no dey finish bro. |
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by KaluwisxPRO: 9:51am On Apr 04, 2021 |
If you no change am for that family member wey no wan stop to disturb your phone, you no go move forward. She’s the only way they can get to you, and they are just upset that you have become distant. They are using her sickness as a ploy to suck you dry. Tell that family member of yours to face his immediate family, and that your mother is your only responsibility in the family, and you are well in touch with her. |
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by BluDesk: 9:52am On Apr 04, 2021 |
BRATISLAVA: I agree with you completely. 1 Like |
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by Biggcake: 9:52am On Apr 04, 2021 |
Ebuka78: Crap and big pile of bullshiit.. |
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by BRATISLAVA: 9:53am On Apr 04, 2021 |
pansophist post=100472652: It sounds smart, but that's not the case. Once people get married, they belong to their spouses and children in terms of responsibility. Parents are the children's responsibility as much as children were once the parents responsibility. You can't pass it off. If the Uncle asks them for money he is a pest why can't he leave a married man alone, but if she's sick he should take care of her this is his sister? Nigerians. |
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by maximunimpact(m): 9:53am On Apr 04, 2021 |
kaboninc: OP is stingy and selfish along with anyone sympathizing with him. I will give everything for my mother and family without thinking about it |
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by writeprof(m): 9:54am On Apr 04, 2021 |
BRATISLAVA: I believe such because it exists sir! You disbelieve such if you disbelieve the existence of evil forces. |
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by ivolt: 9:55am On Apr 04, 2021 |
lecturer50: How did they know you got a Federal job? Bragging? To the question. Are you the only child? If no, why are your relatives the one looking after your mum instead of your siblings. You also didn't tell us whether your relatives were the one who raised or offer support to train you in school. The following could be risky. If your village has elders, then report your relative and their blackmail so you don't get wrongly accused in the future. Relocate your mum from the village, change your number so only a few people would know. But before you do this, make sure you have paid all your debts real or figurative and make sure you won't have serious dealings in your village again. Because they will be waiting for you. |
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by Nobody: 9:56am On Apr 04, 2021 |
Invite your mother to visit you as a ploy to get her away from those village people using her to manipulate you. Make her stay with you and get a nurse to care for her. Hope she lives long though or you will be accused of killing her. Or tell them all to fuq off and switch off your phone and live your life in peace if you can ignore your mother's wailing as she dies. Op go with this advice, take ur mom to ur house! 1 Like |
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by Nobody: 9:56am On Apr 04, 2021 |
lecturer50: It should not end there. Your mom should call ur uncle and warn him. If she dies it's not you but him for not giving her peace |
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by BRATISLAVA: 9:56am On Apr 04, 2021 |
writeprof: I believe there are probably evil forces. But I do not believe that people getting sick is to spite wealthy family members. I think they are simply selfish and don't want to help, so they claim the sickness is a thing. I've seen it play out a lot. People let their mothers die, while on trendy vacation abroad, because they just don't want to give them any money because they feel they're trying to gobble all their money. |
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by CapitalBank: 9:57am On Apr 04, 2021 |
lecturer50: You are worried because you have not grown past the stage of putting logic over emotions. Are you the only child of your mother? Cut them off and focus on only your mother. |
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by replete(m): 9:58am On Apr 04, 2021 |
Ebuka78:Well done last born. |
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by Ferdinandu(m): 9:59am On Apr 04, 2021 |
lecturer50:Do the best you can to help your ailing mother without resigning your job. Time happens to us all. Everyone is gonna die if it is your mum's turn to die she will still die no matter what you did but if it is not her time she will survive. You got your life to live before any other person. This life is a mystery because at the end of it all no matter the relative or not we are all finally standing alone |
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by ahiboilandgas: 10:01am On Apr 04, 2021 |
lecturer50:why not take ur mum to your current location and take care of her well. |
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by OkoYM(m): 10:01am On Apr 04, 2021 |
Ebuka78:He has to surport his immediate family, no doubt, but u nee le |
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by phorget(m): 10:01am On Apr 04, 2021 |
Must you resign before you can be able to take care of your mother? Must you reside in the village before you can be able to take care of your mother? So many "must yous" but I must tell you the real fact... Your people ain't happy that you are about making a headway hence they are trying so hard to tie you down using your mother as the rope. Your uncle in particular want you to come back to the village so the family suffering can continue. The solution... Please do not listen to any of them and if possible do cut ties with them all. Look for away to take care of yourself mothers health issue. The money you send to them should be able to take care of that and even if you resign your job will your presence without money bring the cure? |
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by vincentjk(m): 10:03am On Apr 04, 2021 |
Op your mother is suffering from a spiritual illness and your uncle is behind it, your mum is even suspecting him already but she's sick and don't have an option. Go get your mum, take her to a strong pastor or to a native doctor for cleansing. Be careful because that uncle of yours is jealous and just wants to waste you both. Enemy at the gates. |
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by OkoYM(m): 10:05am On Apr 04, 2021 |
Ebuka78:He has to surport his immediate family, no doubt, but u need to understand there maybe misconception about his salary, how much is the salary? Sometimes people believe FG job is a big offer and they keep coming with wrong expectations. I will advice you do your best anyway, but don't die of their expectations. |
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by Lomprico2: 10:05am On Apr 04, 2021 |
lecturer50: your relatives are the real VIP village people. if you can bring your mom to where u stay, do. if you can't keep sending what u can. but as per resigning? that your uncle is evil. they have lived their lives, they should allow u live yours. are u the only child of your mother? |
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by Laturuturu: 10:05am On Apr 04, 2021 |
I understand what you are going thru My uncle said the same thing to me He said I should close down my biz at Computer village then go back to village To take care of my mom I sent money regularly by God grace At least 25k a month My brother do send 15 as well The advise is out of hatred and jealousy Your mom understand I blv They tried to turn me and my siblings against my mom telling her we have abandoned her. She was furious at them. She personally told me that there advise is ill conceived thru hidden hatred Na so Ibo ethnic be ....most of the time Dont yeiled to them... Awon eni ibi Eniyan buruku , |
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by Nobody: 10:06am On Apr 04, 2021 |
[quote author=Klass99 post=100461588] Lol, I swear down fear catch me at the proposed sharing formula and baseless assumptions he made about OP. [s]What even annoys me the most is how they automatically expect one sibling who is "seemingly doing well" to be the saviour of the others, as if those ones are handicapped. Are the other siblings invalids incapable of making their own way in life or fighting for their own success? That OP has to open salon for one and start a trade for another. [/quote[/s]] Werey dey disguise! When u make it in life, do u all of a sudden turn a blind eye to ur family, get married to a woman from another family and take good care of her, someone that u just fell in lust with, a total stranger and u open ur properties on her name, open business for her and turn a blind eye to ur parents, siblings just cos u re told u owe ur priority to ur own family of A wife and children! Really in as much as I'm aware some family members are envious, leeches and all that, but its high time u realize if u can't help ur own family members, then u shouldn't help any other person for that matter, don't go to orphanages, don't be a philanthropist if u own family aren't well of and affluent, when the whole family is affluent a lot of problems get solved, the children's are happy and always look forward to see their cousins all the time and there's isn't talk of money since everyone is comfortable, there's nothing as sweet as when all ur siblings and parents are well of and affluent! Aswear there's nothing as sweet and fulfilling as that, and I pray for it in my own family, me and all my siblings and parents in high positions and well off, but prayer doesn't get this things so I don't believe in prayers I believe that if we work on it together by lifting each other up that we would all get there together, We rise by lifting others only applies to my family first! |
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by Slimjim6969(m): 10:06am On Apr 04, 2021 |
Oga if u know what is good for u carry ur mama from that village cos ur family want to finish u through your mama,don't say u are not warnd. lecturer50: |
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by awa(m): 10:06am On Apr 04, 2021 |
You are not showing enough maturity in handling this issue. I understand that you are overwhelmed but it could be because of them - your family that God gave you the job for. Make them understand what your salary range is like and if you are living flamboyantly, then you need to live moderately without things exposing you as having enough cash when you are just starting. Helping families will keep you going in life |
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by alizma: 10:07am On Apr 04, 2021 |
lecturer50:If not for your mum, I will say remove your known sim and throw it into any nearest river around you. Nevertheless, you can start acting like a prodigal son. If they call you don't pick, only call and discuss with them when you want and anytime you travelling home, once you are through with your objective of travelling home, don't inform anybody of your coming and don't tell anyone you are leaving. |
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by jahrule: 10:10am On Apr 04, 2021 |
Get her a good, mature house help if you can afford it. lecturer50: |
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by NuhuIbrahim(m): 10:10am On Apr 04, 2021 |
My brother be wise, don't you ever try to resign from your work but make sure you take care your Mother. Mind you your Uncle is your enemy for asking you to resign. |
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by Jackdasilver(m): 10:11am On Apr 04, 2021 |
[quote author=lecturer50 post=100459147] True. I called my mom and told her what my uncle said, she said I should not take him seriously. Thanks Are you the only child? If yes. Allow your mum to be staying with you in the city for now, until she overcomes her health issues. |
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by Fhowe: 10:13am On Apr 04, 2021 |
lecturer50:Bomb dey that your uncle head ,as if the old woman would live forever .Op just get a maid that will take care of her and send what you can afford constantly also carry your siblings along it should be a collective effort not left for one child 1 Like |
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by hedonido: 10:13am On Apr 04, 2021 |
It's never a good idea to abandon a parent (especially when the other parent is late) in the village. That always hastens their death and can only bring nothing but trouble. The proverbial village people are no good. The only solution is to bring her to the city. Let her live with you or any of your siblings, or if possible, rent a small place close by for her in the city. You can then easily get someone to cater to her health and wellbeing. |
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by joyousever(f): 10:15am On Apr 04, 2021 |
I'm suspecting that uncle of yours to be the enemy of your progress, possibly envious of your new level. My take is that, you should bring your mother over where you are, get a health official to attend to her appropriately to full recovery before taking her back to the village. Then support her with a business set up, so that she can use it to support herself and be less dependent on you. lecturer50: |
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by Originalsly: 10:17am On Apr 04, 2021 |
lecturer50: This gives us a better picture of the situation. Someone suggested you take your mother to live with you. Don't. She is used to the village ... has a routine... and familiar people to interact with. Take her out of the village and put her in a mansion with maids ... she will be lonely.... loneliness will lead to depression... depression to even poorer health and poor health is a highway to death..... the very path that leads to early death to many elderly parents uprooted and taken abroad. On above.... learn from your siblings.... have two numbers just like them... one to work in the village and the other not to accept calls from the village. Arrange with your siblings to take turns being with her as often as possible and communicating with her as often as possible. Pay someone to stay with her.... and each time you visit.... take something for her.... new shoes.... clothing... ordinary wrist watch... etc. Be courteous to your uncle and the other extortionists....take little goodies for their children or hand out small monies. Never ever give the extortionists money.... it doesn't matter how much you give... it will be below their expectation. In life... you cannot please everybody... don't even try. Your uncle is likely an envious person.... maybe his dream was to have a government job... never did... so why should he sit in pain and have you sitting in the seat of his dream? He will do whatever he can to get you out of his dream job.... he is now using your mother's health. If this fails... another issue will come up. You are in a mind game and don't even know.... learn to play like your siblings. 1 Like |
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