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How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? - Family (7) - Nairaland

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Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by Ebuka78: 10:38am On Apr 04, 2021
joyousever:
Op, never in your wildest dreams attempt to resign your federal job. I repeat, your uncle is angry and envious of your new level. Peace!!

Only in Nigeria on would hear that words of yours. The same uncle that was there when he was raised.

Stop all these your nollywood comment.

1 Like

Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by silento(m): 10:38am On Apr 04, 2021
kaboninc:


I WILL GIVE...Well let's wait until you have.

You do not know what it feels like...

people like this dont have up to 30k in there account me am like the back bone of my family omo some months i dey spend up to 200k without buying cloth for my self , still most of them dey complain say i dey stingy , na only my mum dey most time pity for me based on she know say e no easy to be caring care of others while no one is looking after you

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Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by myk1759: 10:40am On Apr 04, 2021
.
lecturer50:
Please house I need an advice.

Ever since I got a federal government job,

my relatives have been disturbing me for money.

There must always be an issue that involves money which they want me to solve.

Recently, my mom become sick.

They are threatening me that I would be held responsible if my mom dies,if I don't make sure she is cured.

But I have taken her to hospitals, and she is trying to recover.

I do this whenever I visit home since I am working in a state far from home.

Her health challenge is due to old age.

But today my uncle called me that I should resign, get back to the village and personally take care of my mom,

failure of which,if she dies, the whole family would hold me responsible for choosing job over my mom.

Can you imagine resigning your federal job to get to the village and start staying?

The calls, the demands, the attacks are getting too much for me.

Please should I just switch off my phone so that no one can contact me?

I just need advice?
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by BRATISLAVA: 10:40am On Apr 04, 2021
kaboninc:


I WILL GIVE...Well let's wait until you have.

You do not know what it feels like...

To be stingy, married, or what?
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by blaise26abj(m): 10:40am On Apr 04, 2021
lecturer50:
Please house I need an advice.

Ever since I got a federal government job,

my relatives have been disturbing me for money.

There must always be an issue that involves money which they want me to solve.

Recently, my mom become sick.

They are threatening me that I would be held responsible if my mom dies,if I don't make sure she is cured.

But I have taken her to hospitals, and she is trying to recover.

I do this whenever I visit home since I am working in a state far from home.

Her health challenge is due to old age.

But today my uncle called me that I should resign, get back to the village and personally take care of my mom,

failure of which,if she dies, the whole family would hold me responsible for choosing job over my mom.

Can you imagine resigning your federal job to get to the village and start staying?

The calls, the demands, the attacks are getting too much for me.

Please should I just switch off my phone so that no one can contact me?

I just need advice?

My 5 kobo advice is this . If you have siblings , ask one of them to bring your mom to where you stay . Try to give her the best medical help you can afford under your roof . Let her fully recover before she returns to the village . That way no one will be asking you for money when she is directly under your care .
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by kaboninc(m): 10:40am On Apr 04, 2021
silento:


people like this dont have up to 30k in there account me am like the back bone of my family omo some months i dey spend up to 200k without buying cloth for my self , still most of them dey complain say i dey stingy , na only my mum dey most time pity for me based on she know say e no easy to be caring care of others while no one is looking after you

Nor mind them.

Forgetting that you have to stay strong so you can still support.
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by samuelson06(m): 10:41am On Apr 04, 2021
Ebuka78:


A river that forgets it source will surely runs dry. You have to help your mum, God gave you that job to support your family.


If it were your girlfriend, you would help her without thinking twice.

You can divide your salary into half, and give your sister to start a Saloon business/ become a hair stylist.

The next salary, you divide it and assist your brothers or brother to open a trade.

In 3 months time, there wouldn't be pressure on you to help the family. It is not good for one person to be rich in a family, let the rich one help others to get rich.

You should send 50% of your last month salary to sustain your mum.


You don't know what she passed through before birthing you. She would never tell you.

Switch of your cell phone and regret it for life.

Send her half of your salary for her health and remain blessed for life.

Story! You know it's easy to preach. So he should become the sacrificial lamb because he got a federal job? Did you even ask him of the salary? Suddenly, his own problems are insignificant and it's going to be about his family now. You've forgotten that he's also trying to raise a family.

Isn't the mom and dad that brought him into poverty? Did they plan for anyone? They'd tell you it's God that gives children, so let God also take care of her. Allow the young man to take it easy with his life. Allow him to breath and respond to them at his own pace. When you have your own job, use it to settle everyone in the family.
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by kaboninc(m): 10:41am On Apr 04, 2021
BRATISLAVA:


To be stingy, married, or what?

Go back and read the entire conversation. So you'll make very good productive use of your brain.
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by itsmepareto: 10:42am On Apr 04, 2021
I don't know how easy it is for you, I would have advice you relocate your mum to stay with you. They are using her as an avenue of extorting you. If you don't act fast they will eventually charm you or do you evil. You need God protection. Pray always and back itt with fasting with a strong prayer point. My advice


lecturer50:
Please house I need an advice.

Ever since I got a federal government job,

my relatives have been disturbing me for money.

There must always be an issue that involves money which they want me to solve.

Recently, my mom become sick.

They are threatening me that I would be held responsible if my mom dies,if I don't make sure she is cured.

But I have taken her to hospitals, and she is trying to recover.

I do this whenever I visit home since I am working in a state far from home.

Her health challenge is due to old age.

But today my uncle called me that I should resign, get back to the village and personally take care of my mom,

failure of which,if she dies, the whole family would hold me responsible for choosing job over my mom.

Can you imagine resigning your federal job to get to the village and start staying?

The calls, the demands, the attacks are getting too much for me.

Please should I just switch off my phone so that no one can contact me?

I just need advice?
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by Reelmii: 10:42am On Apr 04, 2021
lecturer50:


She is living alone.

I am not the only child.

There are others trying to make ends meet at different places in Nigeria.

I am the only one whose phone is always on whenever they are calling me from the village.

Others have got new lines which they don't want the other relatives to know due to their disturbance.

Whenever they visit my mom, they would stay with her and then go back.

If any of my relatives ask for their numbers, they give their old lines which they only switch on when they are in the village,

claiming that where they are working, their lines do not go through, since they are in remote areas.
why not relocate her to the city where u are, rent a room for her, get her a private nurse/caregiver... that way u can monitor her and have opportunity to see her frequently,

Make her ur primary responsibility, ignore other relatives and even if u must help, not all the time

They should work for themselves, once ur mum is happy, every other thing is secondary.. her prayers and God's grace is all u need to succeed in life

And if u must give money to relatives, please do transfer, no hand to hand transaction
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by BRATISLAVA: 10:42am On Apr 04, 2021
kaboninc:


Go back and read the entire conversation. So you'll make very good productive use of your brain.

You didn't sound like you were making good use of yours.
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by Nigra(f): 10:42am On Apr 04, 2021
Sorry to say,some relatives are sent by the devil, my advice is help your mum out 1st and do what you can for your relatives,if you can't, don't do shit,cos if you become broke now,they will be the 1st to abuse you #imtalkingfromexperience#.You can't come and kee yourself oh
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by omotoyossi(m): 10:43am On Apr 04, 2021
Bro, you are only useful to them cos u have small cash. The moment you lose your job and the money stops coming, they forget u.
Do not ever quit that job. just take care of mum.
My regards to her.
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by JONSYN7154: 10:43am On Apr 04, 2021
lecturer50:
Please house I need an advice.

Ever since I got a federal government job,

my relatives have been disturbing me for money.

There must always be an issue that involves money which they want me to solve.

Recently, my mom become sick.

They are threatening me that I would be held responsible if my mom dies,if I don't make sure she is cured.

But I have taken her to hospitals, and she is trying to recover.

I do this whenever I visit home since I am working in a state far from home.

Her health challenge is due to old age.

But today my uncle called me that I should resign, get back to the village and personally take care of my mom,

failure of which,if she dies, the whole family would hold me responsible for choosing job over my mom.

Can you imagine resigning your federal job to get to the village and start staying?

The calls, the demands, the attacks are getting too much for me.

Please should I just switch off my phone so that no one can contact me?

I just need advice?
Thank God your own village people came out openly and you know them.


God will punish u if you resign.


They don't want you to succeed.


change your phone number. let you immediate family have the new current one.
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by IgboWarlord(m): 10:43am On Apr 04, 2021
BRATISLAVA:


FG staff are all thieves, so there's a lot of money to go round.

Ask anyone working if they only have their salaries from the job. Let's not pretend not to know these things


Bros,i know a lot of impoverished FG employees..It all depends on the FG department he works for and his level..

1 Like

Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by reubenobi(m): 10:44am On Apr 04, 2021
maximunimpact:


Lols... i can change your life in a heartbeat. We are all anom here doesn't mean real men don't hang around here
lol.. please, how do you define real men?
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by Quim2: 10:44am On Apr 04, 2021
lecturer50:
What surprises me is that immediately I got the job, my mom started having health challenges.

I have observed it several times in different people.

When they are able to make a breakthrough in life (like getting a good job, graduation, financial breakthroughs),

something bad (like sickness or death) would affect their relatives, either the mom,dad,son, daughter or any close relative.

Please who else has noticed this, and why must it be so?


I have severally in my life
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by kaboninc(m): 10:45am On Apr 04, 2021
BRATISLAVA:


You didn't sound like you were making good use of yours.


Alright. Thanks. So go make good use of yours
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by Kei144(m): 10:46am On Apr 04, 2021
Ebuka78:


A river that forgets it source will surely runs dry. You have to help your mum, God gave you that job to support your family.


If it were your girlfriend, you would help her without thinking twice.

You can divide your salary into half, and give your sister to start a Saloon business/ become a hair stylist.

The next salary, you divide it and assist your brothers or brother to open a trade.

In 3 months time, there wouldn't be pressure on you to help the family. It is not good for one person to be rich in a family, let the rich one help others to get rich.

You should send 50% of your last month salary to sustain your mum.


You don't know what she passed through before birthing you. She would never tell you.

Switch of your cell phone and regret it for life.

Send her half of your salary for her health and remain blessed for life.

It doesn't always work like that. When I was young, I spent a lot of my money on my siblings, to make them to stand on their feet, but none of them was able to stand on any foot. Now that I am much older, my siblings hate me to the extent that they have used every kind of witchcraft and demonic attack to try to kill me. They say that when I was younger, I helped my relatives, but now I no longer help anyone. Meanwhile, paying my children's school fees is often a big challenge.
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by elmagnifico411(m): 10:47am On Apr 04, 2021
budaatum:
Take what I have to say with salt because I'm going to be harsh.

You see those people asking you to return home to take care of your mother? Those are what is commonly refered to as village people. They heard about your progress, most likely from your mother who blabbed it around town and shouted "praise God" in church, and now they want to ruin you and her and very likely with her help though she might not be aware of it, by making you feel guilty so you do the wrong thing.

The nasty truth is, your mother will die, and you will be made to spend lots of money burying her after spending lots of money failing to keep her alive. And when you now sit down and calculate the money, and the fact that you no more have a job because you left the one you had to care for your mother, you'd likely resent your mother and the village people, and mostly yourself for allowing yourself to be manipulated so easily.

So, here are solutions. Invite your mother to visit you as a ploy to get her away from those village people using her to manipulate you. Make her stay with you and get a nurse to care for her. Hope she lives long though or you will be accused of killing her. Or tell them all to fuq off and switch off your phone and live your life in peace if you can ignore your mother's wailing as she dies.

Either ways, you will be here to live the consequences of your choices long after she dies so..... And salt.



nice one brother.. this is about the best advice I've read. God bless u.

Op, please, I want u to consider what this man has said. Oil dey him head. And I'll also love to add; please, for now, do not visit that village. All they want to do is reduce u to nothing. You being bale to make money and have a stable life gives them no joy. If possible, make use of some mad man approach.. promise Dem hell if anything goes wrong, threaten their lives too, that you'd come with weapons if they do anything to cut your mother's life short. Whether u believe me or not, those your people have a hand in your mom's I'll health. D ploy is to distabilize u, and reduce u to nothing. May God help u in this cos.

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Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by Ebuka78: 10:47am On Apr 04, 2021
myk1759:
Block their numbers. All of them. I did it and I'm at peace.


After blocking their numbers, out of lack of fund his mother dies. Who would pay for the burial?

Who would find the burial?

He would never forgive himself if he hears his mother died. He would start misbehaving, and from there other problems would emanate and from there he becomes dry.

I repeat "a river that forgets his source will surely runs dry."

My uncle made money when he was in Qatar. He never helped anyone, he hid his contact from every one. His pictures and luxurious life styles was seen on his status and Facebook post. In the next 8 months, this went hard for him and he came back to Nigeria empty handed.

He was so a shame to go back to family. Why? Because he was never here for them when he was rich.

A river that which forgets it source will surely runs dry.
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by SpeciallyUnique(m): 10:48am On Apr 04, 2021
pansophist:


Youre Ghanaian I guess? I love you already. Send me an email. It its on my profile.

Thank you
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by lapazi(m): 10:49am On Apr 04, 2021
lecturer50:
Please house I need an advice.

Ever since I got a federal government job,

my relatives have been disturbing me for money.

There must always be an issue that involves money which they want me to solve.

Recently, my mom become sick.

They are threatening me that I would be held responsible if my mom dies,if I don't make sure she is cured.

But I have taken her to hospitals, and she is trying to recover.

I do this whenever I visit home since I am working in a state far from home.

Her health challenge is due to old age.

But today my uncle called me that I should resign, get back to the village and personally take care of my mom,

failure of which,if she dies, the whole family would hold me responsible for choosing job over my mom.

Can you imagine resigning your federal job to get to the village and start staying?

The calls, the demands, the attacks are getting too much for me.

Please should I just switch off my phone so that no one can contact me?

I just need advice?

This is a simple case, move your mum to where you are, cut them off. Take care of her!

You can even get a nurse specifically to care for her.
Move her from that village asap.

Just tell them that you want her to come and spend 2weeks and keep her with you.

She will be alright
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by ogub(m): 10:50am On Apr 04, 2021
chatinent:
Bros, you are not from Bethlehem!


If I were you, I'll set up a provision store for mom to minimise the monthly expectations.

I can easily relate to what you mean.


Advise everyone of your relatives to go and WORK! Make them know you have your own life to live.


To be great, you have to be stingy.

Because if you fall now, those people will still abuse you that there's nothing you did from your Federal job for so and so years. They'll forget you helped them!
To be great, you have to be stingy.
That's not correct because a liberal soul shall be made fat, give with discretion
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by pansophist(m): 10:50am On Apr 04, 2021
Regex:


Guy suppose understand what is going on here. Them fit don try charms to bring down the young man e no work now them want make him quite en job just because mama is sick. That's strategy to bring the young man down.



@op if you quit your job, you are a sore loser! Mama is sick, she will die any time, if not now, later. And when she does and no responsibility of taking care of mama, then you will realise your job would have been there for you. If you quit job, how you go take care of mama?

Use your sense, na strategy village people use come oh... Them don try you via charm e no work now them want use omenala hold you... No gree

The Uncle it the archetypal "village people". Those ones that believe because they are older, your uncle and you respect them, they can lord authority over you no matter how ridiculous. Everyone have those people, I have them as well, but I realise that in their madness, when it comes to me, they are cautioned, because they've seen clearly that I'm not easily manipulated, and will withdraw my respect, infact block you instantly if you cross the line. Respect is not cowardice.

The Uncle could make such ridiculous demand because he knows that he is soft, and his respect for him can be overstretched to a point of tyranny. Hence, he could suggest such ridiculousness asking him to quit his job. How about asking him to bring his mum to live with him? That way, he can retain his job and care for him mum.

One of the superpower people should learn is the ability to not feel guilty because someone is trying trying make you feel it. Saying that he is responsible for his mother's death because he will not quit his job is downright wrong, and unfair to someone that is providing. Those are the kind of family members I blocked off, love unites people not blood. You can't say you love me and mounting such allegation on me, especially when I'm providing and you can't even do half the shit I do.

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Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by Mofranky(f): 10:50am On Apr 04, 2021
If there's someone who will help you look after her when you go to work, take her to your place of residence and continue treatment until she's fit to return to the village.

Family people and wahala
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by Ebuka78: 10:50am On Apr 04, 2021
Nigra:
Sorry to say,some relatives are sent by the devil, my advice is help your mum out 1st and do what you can for your relatives,if you can't, don't do shit,cos if you become broke now,they will be the 1st to abuse you #imtalkingfromexperience#.You can't come and kee yourself oh

Another comment based on Nollywood. Stop calling the devil. If it were his girlfriend, he would spend everything on her. Let us be realistic. Our rich brothers and sisters find it hard in giving or helping the family.


Remember his blood is his mum's blood.
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by Blackdisciple(m): 10:51am On Apr 04, 2021
But today my uncle called me that I should resign, get back to the village and personally take care of my mom.


You shouldn't try that oo,cos if you do na still that your uncle and the rest of them will make hell out of live for you.

I like what the first guy that commented say, you can set up a biss for your mum to take off some stress from you.

Don't mind them ooo.
A friend once said to me that if papa die no be first born kill papa oo, so the burial na everybody burial no be only first born go carry am for head ,what am trying to say here is that you mum illness is everyone illness so that one wey ur uncles and other family members are saying na Rubbish.

In life we all face such but some are more while some are mild. do your best .

NB. Never resign as asked by your uncle cos that's not a wise decision for now. If your work has HMO and provision for parents then register her too.
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by Nobody: 10:52am On Apr 04, 2021
Coronavirus84:

Please fund your mum medical bills and tell those relatives of urs to stop calling you again. Am a federal government worker and I know how the salary is for now with this newly introduced IPPIS. As for me, na only my mum and dad that is included in my funding for now, any other person should go and find work to do

Please are you married? If yes, do you give your mother in law. I just got a federal job and my wife always suggest I give her mother salary rhough when I frown at it she calls it a joke but she has suggested it severally and I'm sick about it
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by Bianda24: 10:52am On Apr 04, 2021
I quite understand what you are going through. Inside of you, you will be thinking how did I get here particularly now that I just get a job, federal job for that matter.

Then you have to use your brain, you need to take care of your mum. Don't ever think of resigning from your job cos if you did where will you get money to take care of mama.

Take a leave maybe part of your annual leave and go home to sort out things with your mum and dad and not one sort of an uncle.
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by ImaIma1(f): 10:52am On Apr 04, 2021
CapedBaldy:

all that's left is for him to create percentage for himself as payment for creating the formula.


cheesy

1 Like

Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by sirk98: 10:53am On Apr 04, 2021
My simple advice is this.Firstly,ur family members are your enemy,secondly ensure u have someone inolace that will monitor her and give u reported about her health,thirdly,don't resign from ur work.They want u to come begging oo.Federal government job is not easy to get ooo.,Thirdly,once ur mother is OK.Distance your self from ur family member,don't let them no ur worth.Thank you

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