It has been 12years now since my dad has been down with Stroke which has affected his speech,his right hand and leg and some 4years ago,he couldn't walk anymore but had to be carried to sleep,sit and all physical metabolism is done where he is,even after I and my mum have spent and still spends a lot on physiotherapy,speech therapy,brain checkups at Mecure oshodi,routine and forthnight high blood pressure checkups with expensive drugs and still no changes but it gets worse,all done going around in taxi as I have no car.....

I was 18 and in 200level in a federal uni with him and my mum my only support system when all of this started,couldn't concentrate and focus on school work anymore as I am the firstborn of a 7 boys family and my attention was always needed.....Mum told me I need to drop out that she can't afford all of this alone but I was strong hearted and determined to graduate with a B.Eng...

I had issues with my lecturers as my attendance were poor and my course adviser said it to my face that I would never graduate but I never told them about my travails or they wouldn't even believe me anyways cos they were mostly SADIST,All Engineering lecturers in Uniben especially Mechanical/PRODUCTION ENGINEERING from 08/09 upward,OGUN KILL ALL OF UNA!!! Life was tough for me and my Mum....

Now that I am a Man and supposed to be focus on my life future and raising a family but this is still taking a toll on me emotionally,financially,mentally and I will come home to my mum nagging,crying that she has tried enough over the years and i might come home one day and she has left ....THIS BREAKS ME,I AM TIRED,I DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO....I LOVE MY DAD,HE IS IN PAINS TOO!!!

IF I COULD SEE THE FUTURE BACK THEN WHEN IT STARTED,I WOULD HAVE ASKED THE DOCTORS FOR MERCY DEATH,DO NIGERIAN DOCTORS OR HOSPITALS GIVE OUT MERCY DEATH TO PATIENTS?

NAIRALANDERS,I AM DEPRESSED AND I NEED YOUR ADVICE

sorry for the long post. Mods please help this thread to front page for more advice

Elders only

Please don't try it bro, it can create a generation curse

So sorry, please don't kill him. Continue praying for him, God will help you out.

Lemme pee, I'm coming
Alright, I'm back

No matter what, he's your loving father.. his seed brought you into this world. The mercy death on this is unjustifiable.

It's true it hurts, but you have to carry the cross.. it has its own blessings.. believe me.

Try and take care of him but KNOW your limit.. don't spend much on him but take care of him.

Even if he dies on the long run, you won't feel guilty.. you will feel fulfilled that you tried your best.

Encourage your maale, nwanyi Ibem!!! She must have seen alot to the extent of giving the thought of running away.
If you can, get a nanny that can take care of your Dad.

Don't do something stupid
Read it again

Cheers
This too will pass

Meanwhile Nairalanders check out my signature for affordable Agro commodities from north

Do not try anything funny with him o. We are watching you.

maureensylvia:
Lemme pee, I'm coming
Alright, I'm back

No matter what, he's your loving father.. his seed brought you into this world. The mercy death on this is unjustifiable.

It's true it hurts, but you have to carry the cross.. it has its own blessings.. believe me.

Try and take care of him but KNOW your limit.. don't spend much on him but take care of him.

Even if he dies on the long run, you won't feel guilty.. you will feel fulfilled that you tried your best.

Encourage your maale, nwanyi Ibem!!! She must have seen alot to the extent of giving the thought of running away.
If you can, get a nanny that can take care of your Dad.

Don't do something stupid
Read it again

Cheers
This too will pass

Thank you for this,the doctors wouldn't even attend to us if a particular tests or drugs were not done or bought and they are so expensive

Omorotionmwann:
It has been 12years now since my dad has been down with Stroke which has affected his speech,his right hand and leg and some 4years ago,he couldn't walk anymore but had to be carried to sleep,sit and all physical metabolism is done where he is,even after I and my mum have spent and still spends a lot on physiotherapy,speech therapy,brain checkups at Mecure oshodi,routine and forthnight high blood checkups with expensive drugs and still no changes but it gets worse,all done going around in taxi as I have no car.....

I was 18 and in 200level in a federal uni with him and my mum my only support system when all of this started,couldn't concentrate and focus on school work anymore as I am the firstborn of a 7 boys family.....Mum told me I need to drop out that she can't afford all of this alone but I was strong hearted to graduate with a B.Eng...

I had issues with my lecturers as my attendance were poor and my course adviser said I would never graduate but I never told them about my travails or they wouldn't even believe me anyway cos they were mostly SADIST,All Engineering lecturers in Uniben especially Mechanical/PRODUCTION ENGINEERING from 08/09 upward,OGUN KILL ALL OF UNA!!! Life was tough for me and my Mum....

Now I am Man supposed to be focus on his life and future but this is still taking a toll on me emotionally,financially,mentally and I will come home to my mum nagging,crying that she has tried enough over the years and i might come home one day and she has left ....THIS BREAKS ME,I AM TIRED,I DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO....I LOVE MY DAD,HE IS IN PAINS TOO!!!

IF I COULD SEE THE FUTURE BACK THEN WHEN IT STARTED,I WOULD HAVE ASKED THE DOCTORS FOR MERCY DEATH,DO NIGERIAN DOCTORS OR HOSPITALS GIVE OUT MERCY DEATH TO PATIENTS?

NAIRALANDERS,I AM DEPRESSED AND I NEED YOUR ADVICE

sorry for the long post...Mynd44,Lalasticlala,Dominique,farano please help this thread to front page for more advice

At this stage, you have to discuss with every member of your family if mercy death will be an option

Whatever the family agrees on is what you guys will accept

It's a hard decision but, what else?

.

Euthanzing is the correct word here. I swear if he could talk to you, he would tell you to go ahead. He is in pains, seeing y'all going through all that to take care of him is making him sad also. He just can't tell y'all. Hospitals does euthanization, you just have to talk to your mom and brothers about it. It's not a decision you can take alonew, except you have a heart like mine. The hospital would make it faster and easier. I think they'll put him to sleep first, then inject something that'll stop his heart. Thereby, he wouldn't even feel anything.

For those quoting me, this is just my opinion. Like others mentioned, he should try stem cell therapy or taken to church for deliverance or sorts. I want him to be well, not suffering. And if the suffering seems like it has no end, euthanize him. I'm sure his condition has affected the education of some of your other six siblings..

SportsHD:
Euthanzing is the correct word here. I swear if he could talk to you, he would tell you to go ahead. He is in pains, seeing y'all going through all that to take care of him is making him sad also. He just can't tell y'all. Hospitals does euthanization, you just have to talk to your mom and brothers about it. It's not a decision you can take alonew, except you have a heart like mine. The hospital would make it faster and easier. I think they'll put him to sleep first, then inject something that'll stop his heart. Thereby, he wouldn't even feel anything.
Please update us on how it goes.

Euthanasia is legal in Nigeria?

As someone rightly said it will come to pass. Remember thou shalt not kill. Cheers

sirjoggy:
Please don't try it bro, it can create a generation curse

Religion is damaging your mentality. The dad has been in that state for 12 years now. I'm sure no one would want that for himself. Not being able to talk or do anything yourself.

Drop all emotional sentiments here, think logically. Imagine the peace of mind he and the mom would have, coupled with the amount they'll save not going back and forth to the hospital.

If it were my family member, lord knows he would have been in the ground by now.
It's better for him to be at peace in heaven than to be suffering here In life.

Kobojunkie:
Euthanasia is legal in Nigeria?

Yeah, look it up. Either for animals or humans. But, it has to be done by a certified medical personnel.
For y'all quoting me, even if euthanizing human is illegal, lord knows I would have arranged with my family and our doctor to end that person suffering.

OP do the best you can, it's a burden that a lot of families have to face everyday everywhere in the world. It's a pity your life has been impacted this way, but I'm glad you were able to graduate. Keep hope alive, wish you all the best

SportsHD:

Yeah, look it up. Either for animals or humans. But, it has to be done by a certified medical personnel.

Euthanasia (of humans) is illegal in Nigeria.

People are really going through hell here on earth...

Stay strong, bro

Don't kill your father. The problem here Is financial and I'm sure if you could solve that you wouldn't be this overly worried.

I'm gonna urge you to find a way to get a financial breakthrough while you guys keep making your father's health.

SportsHD:

Yeah, look it up. Either for animals or humans. But, it has to be done by a certified medical personnel.

It is illegal.

sirjoggy:
Please don't try it bro, it can create a generation curse

His suggestion is wrong but please don't bring religion to it as it doesn't have anything to do with it. Thanks.

Someone said it'd bring generational curses upon the op's family...So the pains and agony that it has been bringing upon the op and his mom has been a generational blessing abi?

If we tell una say religion and politics na the two things wey dey kill black people mentality,una no dey believe..

Sometimes make una dey use una head

OP to be honest with you....na the best solution be that.
Forget sentiments & just talk it through with your mum & siblings.
Una don try abeg

I will be back to tell u my story.

SportsHD:

Religion is damaging your mentality. The dad has been in that state for 12 years now. I'm sure no one would want that for himself. Not being to talk or do anything yourself.
Drop all emotional sentiments here, think logically. Imagine the peace of mind he and the mom would have, coupled with the amount they'll save not going back and forth to the hospital.

Most of those commenting have not spent one month in the OP's.
They think it's childs play to feed, bath, pack poo, clean ass, change diaper, or carry the dad up and down EVERY DAY!!..not to talk of 12years.
Not to mention the funds going down, the emotional, physical and mental strain
Las Las...e go still kick the bucket. ..
Op..just tell the Most High to do the needful if He knows ur dad won't recover.
This life ain't balanced at all...

MufasaLion:


His suggestion is wrong but please don't bring religion to it as it doesn't have anything to do with it. Thanks.

Pardon me...but assuming the dad was brain dead. How long do you think they can go on keeping him in life support?

halogate:
Most of those commenting have not spent one month in the OP's.
They think it's childs play to feed, bath, pack poo, clean ass, change diaper, or carry the dad up and down EVERY DAY!!..not to talk of 12years.
Not to mention the funds going down, the emotional, physical and mental strain
Las Las...e go still kick the bucket. ..
Op..just tell the Most High to do the needful if He knows ur dad won't recover.
This life ain't balanced at all...

So, it hasn't occurred to you that the reason this man still lives is because the Most High allows it?

Kobojunkie:
So, it hasn't occurred to you that the reason this man still lives is because the Most High allows it?

And how long should the suffering to both parties continue?
Till a miracle happens?..for another 12yrs?...

halogate:

And how long should the suffering to both parties continue?
Till a miracle happens?..for another 12yrs?...

I am not the Most High!

Aren't there nursing homes in Nigeria that take care of invalids like this?

Euthanasia, or assisted suicide has to be voluntary. The invalid has to give his consent, except for cases where he/she has no control of their cognitive faculties. That is not the case here.

Anything short of that is murder, plain and simple. Op may God grant you the wisdom to take the right decision.

It hurts, I feel your dilemma

Hmmm