Iyaebe:
Marriage is indeed complicated,this your story makes premarital sex looks important but however it's against God's commandments which brings the question on how do we know the sexual compatibility of a partner before marriage? I don't know what to say.

Maryliola:
yeah it is complicated.

toujurs:
Buy a vibrator, to stab that urge to death.

Maryliola:
Lately I’ve been finding myself fantasising about being touched by a man , almost every night . A man that will give me orall sexx a man that will turn me on and blow me away. I don’t want to be judged here, but this is genuinely how I’ve been feeling. I don’t want to put pressure on my husband as he has other things to worry about.
A man that will kiss me in all the right places and make me feel like a woman. Sometimes I believe I’m being delusional, or unrealistic. I’m trying to get rid of these thoughts, but I really don’t know how. I have never cheated on my husband and I don’t think I have the guts to do it. I really just want to know how married people cope when that spark is gone. When you begin to look at your spouse like a brother or sister, and romantically the vibes are not there.

Let me also say that I’ve addressed this to him many times, but he stands he’s not willing to compromise.
Help!

ezugegere:
You both need to make conscious efforts to make your marriage work. I think the major problem here is his inability to last, which can be solved.
Don't try to pressure him into MouthAction since he finds it disgusting. I too don't like it. I don't think it's healthy.

Kobojunkie:
What you would recommend is you work on ways to channel that extra energy into something else. If you no get passion or work, find yourself one. If you already have a job, find other hobbies to help reroute your mind back to that of benefit and away from that which is not of benefit to your marriage.

As for the dynamics of your relationship, if seeing a psychiatrist for professional counseling will help, please do not hesitate at all. Also, you can engage your husband in more husband and wife -ish activities, maybe with other couples, to help you begin to see him more as a partner than as a brother.

As to the love-making, maybe you can both enroll is sex therapy together as well.

Maryliola:
Hey guys

I’m making this post because I don’t want to be judged and I can’t turn my on people in my real life because they may not understand. Well I’ve been married for 2 plus years I’m 27 with a son. I’m going to get personal so embrace yourself.

Myself and my husband have a good relationship, almost too good because I literally see him like my brother. This is to the point where our romantic/lover side of our relationship is kinda dead. I see him naked, it’s like looking at my brother naked. I don’t feel turned on, or excited. We talk and gist like friends, but romantically things are flat. Our sex life is mediocre I guess. He doesn’t do oralll sexxx and he ejaculates very fast. I’m talking 10 seconds, and it’s every single time despite taking different preventative measures. I know that I’m extremely clean as I’m very observant of myself and he also tells me all the time. Yet orall sexxx is disgusting to him and “dehumanising”. There’s no passion when we kiss, its forced most times.


Lately I’ve been finding myself fantasising about being touched by a man , almost every night . A man that will give me orall sexx a man that will turn me on and blow me away. I don’t want to be judged here, but this is genuinely how I’ve been feeling. I don’t want to put pressure on my husband as he has other things to worry about.
A man that will kiss me in all the right places and make me feel like a woman. Sometimes I believe I’m being delusional, or unrealistic. I’m trying to get rid of these thoughts, but I really don’t know how. I have never cheated on my husband and I don’t think I have the guts to do it. I really just want to know how married people cope when that spark is gone. When you begin to look at your spouse like a brother or sister, and romantically the vibes are not there.

Let me also say that I’ve addressed this to him many times, but he stands he’s not willing to compromise.

Help!

Lalasticlala I need this on front page as I need help for people to see this.

Iyaebe:
Let me call Pan.sophist, buk.atyne and Mari.ahAngel to come give advise from their wealth of knowledge and wisdom. Premarital Sex how important is it?then God's factor I'm really confused.

bukatyne:

Eku invite

Iyaebe:
You'll have to like it if your wife wants it,she's clean and I read it's even cleaner than the mouth,it cleanses and purify itself except in cases of infection

ezugegere:


I don't have to like it. I don't have to do everything to please my wife, and she knows and accepts that. No matter how self-cleansing you think the vagina is, infection is still very common among ladies, not because they're promiscuous most times but because the chemistry of that region can very easily change. I don't play with what goes into my mouth.

Iyaebe:
Hope you won't demand for what you don't like?that'll amount to selfishness.

juri:
There is the other possibility that he could be a secret homosexual, hence no sexual attraction. All everybody is even saying here is based on your narrative. Nobody had the opportunity of hearing from your husband for example. So take advice here with care.

Maryliola:
yeah it is complicated.