No disrespect to my Igbo friends but this culture is shitty and should be abolished!

NoQualmz:


Dont mind the SIMPle Op. he's scared of calling the exact state and town where this rubbish is happening...maybe he's scared the girls brothers will beat him up. He just wants some ediots to drag the entire igbo race.

The fake write up got me annoyed this afternoon. How can you come online to belittle a whole Tribe... It's a huge insult.

Na only few people like you understand the useless write up.

This is how we build, encourage and entrench corruption within our societies then we turn around and start blaming whoever is currently holding the baton in Aso Rock

AutoChick4U:
I've got only two brothers and my uncles are millionaires so they don't need ur envelop. Bride price is 50naira just apply within.

Na wash
Your uncles are millionaires yet none of them could help , sort yourself in Abuja
Fake fake

Deicide:
Traditional wedding in Nigeria is just a way for people to milk you dry. Legally it stands no ground.

Traditional marriage is the real marriage.

Even if you don't want to throw a flamboyant traditional ceremony, you must meet their traditional requirements before taking your wife to the altar to say I do.

Stupid thread

You said it already that you are heavily loaded, so why the question and complain?

Go and waste your money onto the stupid vagina people wey go still dey Bleep around in marriage

Afterall, Na married people dey commit adultery pass

Blixon:
Please my Igbo brothers and sisters,

Help me answer this.

I went with my friend to collect list from my prospective in-laws last weekend..

I am fine with the list though heavily loaded already, but now the family are saying that that’s not all, that I will also bring wine and money in envelope for all her brothers, they are seven in number, same for all her paternal uncles and wrappers for her paternal aunts, they called it something in Igbo “to marry for someone”.

Please is this supposed to be so? I am not very knowledgeable about the culture, help me here pls. What custom is this? I don’t understand why I have to marry for anyone else or buy wine for every sibling, uncle and aunt.

The Diokpara’s own is already stated in the list so why asking to do another one for the same diokpara again including the siblings and uncles and aunts.

Imo or Abia state? It won’t even pass those two states
Tell us the exact place, let the people from there give you correct information
Cc:Blixon

Blixon:
Please my Igbo brothers and sisters,

Help me answer this.

I went with my friend to collect list from my prospective in-laws last weekend..

I am fine with the list though heavily loaded already, but now the family are saying that that’s not all, that I will also bring wine and money in envelope for all her brothers, they are seven in number, same for all her paternal uncles and wrappers for her paternal aunts, they called it something in Igbo “to marry for someone”.

Please is this supposed to be so? I am not very knowledgeable about the culture, help me here pls. What custom is this? I don’t understand why I have to marry for anyone else or buy wine for every sibling, uncle and aunt.

The Diokpara’s own is already stated in the list so why asking to do another one for the same diokpara again including the siblings and uncles and aunts.

If your wife agrees just pay bride price and do court wedding. All this extortion is done by greedy relatives who never even cared about her welfare.

AutoChick4U:
I've got only two brothers and my uncles are millionaires so they don't need ur envelop. Bride price is 50naira just apply within.

Nice , I think I know the place if you are from Delta.

Blixon:
Please my Igbo brothers and sisters,

Help me answer this.

I went with my friend to collect list from my prospective in-laws last weekend..

I am fine with the list though heavily loaded already, but now the family are saying that that’s not all, that I will also bring wine and money in envelope for all her brothers, they are seven in number, same for all her paternal uncles and wrappers for her paternal aunts, they called it something in Igbo “to marry for someone”.

Please is this supposed to be so? I am not very knowledgeable about the culture, help me here pls. What custom is this? I don’t understand why I have to marry for anyone else or buy wine for every sibling, uncle and aunt.

The Diokpara’s own is already stated in the list so why asking to do another one for the same diokpara again including the siblings and uncles and aunts.

Bros, everything including the content of the list is negotiable these days, unless you want to act as a ‘big boy’ to your Inlaw’s.

Na all of us dey this country dey suffer am together, they included, so they know how far….so sit them down, especially the father of the bride and talk to him man-to-man.

Every father wants their daughter to enjoy their marriage and have plenty, so they are very very soft when it come to these list of a thing, they will understand where you are coming from…it is the extended family members who have nothing to lose if the marriage go sore or if you guys are drinking garri that will carry the list mata for head like some die hard APC & PDP supporters here….but the bride father if willing can talk sense into them and also give you sound advice on how to proceed.

Some of these extended family members are like vultures who have not eaten a very good meal for many weeks and sighting the prospect of a potential meal are angling not only make up for lost meals not eaten, but eyeing the possibility of taking enough for storage against potential hungry weeks ahead.....You should also understand their weakness and play on it, they are willing to have a very very tinny bite if made to face the reality of not having anything at all.

osuofia2:

PUT 100 NAIRA IN EACH OF THE ENVELOPE

My nigga

ibechris:
If I were u,I will call my would be wife and tell her that after this marriage ceremony,that u don't want to see her family near your house let alone come closer.

Then wait and watch her talk to them to behave.

By virtue of marriage, the two family would become one as well. Have you thought of the other way round? What if you are the one that would be needing help from the woman's family members?

Blixon:
Please my Igbo brothers and sisters,

Help me answer this.

I went with my friend to collect list from my prospective in-laws last weekend..

I am fine with the list though heavily loaded already, but now the family are saying that that’s not all, that I will also bring wine and money in envelope for all her brothers, they are seven in number, same for all her paternal uncles and wrappers for her paternal aunts, they called it something in Igbo “to marry for someone”.

Please is this supposed to be so? I am not very knowledgeable about the culture, help me here pls. What custom is this? I don’t understand why I have to marry for anyone else or buy wine for every sibling, uncle and aunt.

The Diokpara’s own is already stated in the list so why asking to do another one for the same diokpara again including the siblings and uncles and aunts.

Concerning marriage and burial in Igbo land I have come to realize that all this omenala (tradition) is very personal. They will ask you for things once they perceive you can afford it. Even at that they keep asking once you are responding
Once you said you don't have any money again then they will come to there senses and reason with u.
It's pure wickedness
An Ibo friend of mine married a Yoruba lady ....the trad and everything cost 400k
The bride father called him aside and warn him seriously that he is spending too much. Ask him no to yield to anyone demand again .
After the marriage half of the Yam and all other stuff was given back to the guy even part of the money
While his sibling spent over 1.8m still he be like say he no do anything.
They keep asking asking asking even cigar they the list.
After everything one was happy the other was sad

AutoChick4U:
Congratulations oo, na Man you be.

Thanks

But

If you see the way i always feel irritated anytime i see their call's enh

Clearly a deliberate rip-off and they didn't even hide it, telling me since I want to marry a princess from Royal family, i must be equal to the task ahead.

My Wife Uncle was even telling me to go and borrow to add to the requirements,

If not for my maternal uncle's, who had to put heads together to raise over 135k that day, I for no carry my wife go house

Nothing was ommited from the list, despite how much we pleaded for considerations

Now I always view them with enormous disdain

athaboi:
Find this as lies

I was like u until I followed someone to ebonyi to collect list. The total amount on the list was 733k. This was December last year and I'm still in shock up till now

Blixon:
Please my Igbo brothers and sisters,

Help me answer this.

I went with my friend to collect list from my prospective in-laws last weekend..

I am fine with the list though heavily loaded already, but now the family are saying that that’s not all, that I will also bring wine and money in envelope for all her brothers, they are seven in number, same for all her paternal uncles and wrappers for her paternal aunts, they called it something in Igbo “to marry for someone”.

Please is this supposed to be so? I am not very knowledgeable about the culture, help me here pls. What custom is this? I don’t understand why I have to marry for anyone else or buy wine for every sibling, uncle and aunt.

The Diokpara’s own is already stated in the list so why asking to do another one for the same diokpara again including the siblings and uncles and aunts.

OP there is always a way of bargaining these things "Elders to Elders". Take an elderly along, and at worst Back out

Justice4Toto:




Concerning marriage and burial in Igbo land I have come to realize that all this omenala (tradition) is very personal. They will ask you for things once they perceive you can afford it. Even at that they keep asking once you are responding
Once you said you don't have any money again then they will come to there senses and reason with u.
It's pure wickedness
An Ibo friend of mine married a Yoruba lady ....the trad and everything cost 400k
The bride father called him aside and warn him seriously that he is spending too much. Ask him no to yield to anyone demand again .
After the marriage half of the Yam and all other stuff was given back to the guy even part of the money
While his sibling spent over 1.8m still he be like say he no do anything.
They keep asking asking asking even cigar they the list.
After everything one was happy the other was sad

Pure wickedness in daylight i tell you

LieutGen:
By virtue of marriage, the two family would become one as well. Have you thought of the other way round? What if you are the one that would be needing help from the woman's family members?

They will tell him to man up and solve his personal problem

AutoChick4U:
my uncles are millionaires so they don't need ur envelop.

I hear you. Is there any millionionare who doesn't want to be a billionaires

Blixon:
Please my Igbo brothers and sisters,

Help me answer this.

I went with my friend to collect list from my prospective in-laws last weekend..

I am fine with the list though heavily loaded already, but now the family are saying that that’s not all, that I will also bring wine and money in envelope for all her brothers, they are seven in number, same for all her paternal uncles and wrappers for her paternal aunts, they called it something in Igbo “to marry for someone”.

Please is this supposed to be so? I am not very knowledgeable about the culture, help me here pls. What custom is this? I don’t understand why I have to marry for anyone else or buy wine for every sibling, uncle and aunt.

The Diokpara’s own is already stated in the list so why asking to do another one for the same diokpara again including the siblings and uncles and aunts.

Are you From Which state?
Is your wife to be from which state?

You may be lying.....

LieutGen:


OP there is always a way of bargaining these things "Elders to Elders". Take an elderly along, and at worst Back out

The OP is lying.

donbachi:
Pay...but.wen dem ask u for financial help in future.no help dem.as dem no get conscience.
Just 500 naira inside each envelope

You are correct my brother

Justice4Toto:




Concerning marriage and burial in Igbo land I have come to realize that all this omenala (tradition) is very personal. They will ask you for things once they perceive you can afford it. Even at that they keep asking once you are responding
Once you said you don't have any money again then they will come to there senses and reason with u.
It's pure wickedness
An Ibo friend of mine married a Yoruba lady ....the trad and everything cost 400k
The bride father called him aside and warn him seriously that he is spending too much. Ask him no to yield to anyone demand again .
After the marriage half of the Yam and all other stuff was given back to the guy even part of the money
While his sibling spent over 1.8m still he be like say he no do anything.
They keep asking asking asking even cigar they the list.
After everything one was happy the other was sad

OP, you getti the pointi now??

AutoChick4U:
Yes ooooooo, need more kids and a man of my own ooo. Not too much to ask ryt

Where is ur pic? To get suitors u need ur pic to be out there.

doctor306:
The only compulsory pay is the bride price the rest depends on your level of craze “list inclusive “

Exactly. This is what most people don't know. Every item on the bride price list is negotiable with the exception of the bride price which is usually less than ₦100

AutoChick4U:
I've got only two brothers and my uncles are millionaires so they don't need ur envelop. Bride price is 50naira just apply within.

Are you serious, bride price #50, it's show me your picture, before ah apply within

PerfectlyPerfect:

Exactly. This is what most people don't know. Every item on the bride price list is negotiable with the exception of the bride price which is usually less than ₦100

did u mean one hundred naira? Or it was typing error?

NoQualmz:


honestly,very hungry family with heavy drops of poverty and illiteracy.

And Op u should have mentioned the state so tgat people who are from there and are grounded can help u out. This is 2022 u pple should stop giving half information.

If you're marrying from a family in Igbo land, every item on the marriage list is negotiable. They might say 20 tubers of yam but if you negotiate to 10, they'll still accept it after initial strong-head

my bloda lok 4 100 naira and put in each envelope make sure u use 5naira sha so that the envelop will full. what kind of nonsence is this,y be say some tribes no they understand at all ,just because a young man wants to marry ur daughter does not give u the right to cripple him financially

Just walk away

Avoid any manipulative system

Especially if it will impoverish you when done

If you allow it to continue they'll skin you during white wedding and in your marriage


Alternatively say you're not doing beyond what's on the list and ask the lady to advocate for you. If not really really walk away, even if you can afford it. It's control and manipulation and you don't want to build a foundation on that

Highman56:
did u mean one hundred naira? Or it was typing error?

₦100.
It's ₦50 in my village, and in most parts of Orlu L.G.A.
The only issue is the items on the marriage list. Some people try to form big man and they'll go and buy everything on the list. Some others don't know the list is fluid, you can negotiate everything there.
When my sister was getting married, 1 of the items on the list of 4 cartons of beer but my in-laws negotiated to 2 cartons.


That's why it's always good to get prior Intel from someone from the area you want to marry from

As for OP, his babe seems to be ignorant of the marriage rites, and I really pity him on this