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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / My Younger Sister Has This Entitlement Mentality. Help I'm Scared For Her. (30646 Views)
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My Younger Sister Has This Entitlement Mentality. Help I'm Scared For Her. by Brighton1(m): 4:47pm On Mar 02, 2022 |
My post might be lengthy, but Pls read because I need advice. I've been living in Lagos for 5yrs now, even before the death of my father (R.I.P). I lost my dad 4yrs ago. I'm the eldest and I have two younger ones. I'm a contractor. My mom and my siblings are based in ekpoma edo state. I call them regularly, I advice them, I send them money for up-keep, I visit home once in a while. I play both role of a father and elder bro to my siblings. I don't want them feel the absence of my father. My construction team got a contract at Auchi, it was an opportunity for me to visit home often. My younger sister is a 300L student in AAU. She is 22yrs old, she don't read, she's always on social media (tik tok & Co.) Nobody can touch her phone, if my lil bro wants to browse something important or play game with her phone, she will just be screaming at him as if Ogun is about to strike her... Don't touch my phone o, drop it down. Even the phone (iPhone 7) I was the one who gave it to her when I bought my current phone (Samsung). I promised my lil bro he shouldn't worry, as soon as I get paid for the job I'm currently working on, I will get him a phone before I travel back to Lagos. Okay, Yesterday I only said, now that ASUU is on strike, find something to do, get busy, learn a skill, even if it's fashion designing, make-up or catering. She was just giving me flamzy excuses, and the annoying part is she will be raising her voice while talking to me. I almost used a belt to flog her if not for my mom that held me. My father's house is a bungalow, and we have a tanent, Anytime I receive the house rent (200k yearly) I send everything to my mother. My mom would be like I should hold some for myself but I said NO, they need it more. AAU school fees is now x4 compared to what I paid back then when I was there. Yet I'm the one providing 80% of her school fees while my mom 20%. My Lil bro who's just 18 yrs old is more hardworking than her, he goes to my mom's shop to help her out, he's learning how to cut hair and he plays instruments very good (piano & bass guitar). He plays for a church that pays him 5k per week (he plays weds & sun for the church). I pray uniben grant him admission this year. My father was a nice man, he disciplined us and his death won't change that. I want him to be proud of me wherever he is now. Nairaland family, I need your advice. My sister depend so much on the money I give her. I don't want her to be a leech. 154 Likes 11 Shares |
Re: My Younger Sister Has This Entitlement Mentality. Help I'm Scared For Her. by immortalcrown(m): 4:49pm On Mar 02, 2022 |
I see a slay queen in your family. It seems she was pampered for being the only daughter. She is the type that will use her pocket money to feed her boyfriend on campus. The worst part is if you reduce the money you give her for upkeep, she will use insufficient fund as an excuse to flirt. Meanwhile, she is already flirting, probably with old men. My suspicion is based on her not being afraid of you, her refusing to acquire skills for financial independence, her social media addiction and how she guards her phone as if the phone is CBN database. Maybe her nudes and porns she exchanges with her bf are on the phone. If you keep giving her enough money, people will say you used money to spoil her. But since every option has supporters and haters, you have to try different methods. After all, each option will attract both praise and criticism. Try a different method because repetition of the same method cannot produce varied results. The new method I suggest is reducing her upkeep money. If you keep on giving her everything, she is the type that will take in for a poor boy hoping that you will feed her, the boy and the baby she will deliver. 270 Likes 11 Shares |
Re: My Younger Sister Has This Entitlement Mentality. Help I'm Scared For Her. by MadamVanessa(f): 4:49pm On Mar 02, 2022 |
Okay I hope if she starts gobbling dick you won't complain or get bitter with her. Because obviously, someone like your sister who hate working to get some income for herself, will immediately settled for dick gobbling to get money. 44 Likes 5 Shares |
Re: My Younger Sister Has This Entitlement Mentality. Help I'm Scared For Her. by Jennyclay(f): 4:49pm On Mar 02, 2022 |
Sit her down, talk to her in a polite way. Tell her, she would regret her decision in life, if she choose to have this entitlement mentality. Entitlement mentality is the downfall of a woman because it consist of slavery and poverty mindset and men are ready to take advantage thereby treating her like a piece of trash. When she graduates and she obeys the clarion call (NYSC), they would also tell her to learn a skill, Infact SAED (Skills Acquisition & Entreprenuership Department) is a major program that would take more of her time in NYSC camp. Labour market is highly competitive, most people with two jobs are still looking for a skill to acquire in order to make ends meet. I have a job and I also do business to earn a living. No man can rubbish me because of his money. I hope your sister would listen to my advice. You also need to reduce the money you give to her. I commend you for your good work... More Grace to you Sir. 81 Likes 10 Shares |
Re: My Younger Sister Has This Entitlement Mentality. Help I'm Scared For Her. by Nobody: 4:50pm On Mar 02, 2022 |
My brother, she's already a leech. When a girl starts raising her voice at you just know that she has already started collecting dicks outside, Na why she dey get morale shout for u. Seize her phone and watch her senses come back to her. 142 Likes 6 Shares |
Re: My Younger Sister Has This Entitlement Mentality. Help I'm Scared For Her. by Nobody: 4:53pm On Mar 02, 2022 |
she blong to the senseless gender, so wetin you expect.. check out she dey send nudes giv boys, Na why she dey keep phone 15 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: My Younger Sister Has This Entitlement Mentality. Help I'm Scared For Her. by MrLondonder: 4:55pm On Mar 02, 2022 |
Brighton1: wow. big tittys is noce bro....is she lightskin sir? 1 Like 1 Share |
Re: My Younger Sister Has This Entitlement Mentality. Help I'm Scared For Her. by MrBrownJay1(m): 4:56pm On Mar 02, 2022 |
a few mind resetting slaps and getting rid of her deluded phone will solve the problem ASAP! 28 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: My Younger Sister Has This Entitlement Mentality. Help I'm Scared For Her. by Nobody: 5:02pm On Mar 02, 2022 |
MadamVanessa:Just for male validation, you write the most stupid things... 28 Likes 1 Share |
Re: My Younger Sister Has This Entitlement Mentality. Help I'm Scared For Her. by Nobody: 5:05pm On Mar 02, 2022 |
Raspberries: Try get sense. That girl made lots of sense! You're always pained whenever your fellow gender doesn't support your stupid feminist thinking. 60 Likes 5 Shares |
Re: My Younger Sister Has This Entitlement Mentality. Help I'm Scared For Her. by Nobody: 5:10pm On Mar 02, 2022 |
GoodHardDick:She could have made sense without the obscene writeup... But I don't expect you to get it... 18 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: My Younger Sister Has This Entitlement Mentality. Help I'm Scared For Her. by Nobody: 5:13pm On Mar 02, 2022 |
Raspberries: Again try get sense. That girl made lots of sense beyond your comprehension. 32 Likes 3 Shares |
Re: My Younger Sister Has This Entitlement Mentality. Help I'm Scared For Her. by Nobody: 5:15pm On Mar 02, 2022 |
OP, your sister is the type that will run away from home to go and live with a guy and starts collecting dick because of money. Nigeria girls are so full of entitlement mentality.. Na why dem dey always use dem for rituals 24 Likes 3 Shares |
Re: My Younger Sister Has This Entitlement Mentality. Help I'm Scared For Her. by Nobody: 5:16pm On Mar 02, 2022 |
GoodHardDick:When you want to advise your sisters, use the phrase, "gobbling dick"... This is the Op's relative... I know being crude makes sense to you, but you can offer an advice without using obscene words... When you do that, you just sound stupid... But you lack morals... 31 Likes 3 Shares |
Re: My Younger Sister Has This Entitlement Mentality. Help I'm Scared For Her. by Nobody: 5:18pm On Mar 02, 2022 |
Johndagr8t:The refugee from Niger... 8 Likes 1 Share |
Re: My Younger Sister Has This Entitlement Mentality. Help I'm Scared For Her. by daveP(m): 5:25pm On Mar 02, 2022 |
Seize that phone and find out what she’s hiding that she’s willing to tear you apart for just touching it! In such a situo, what would your father have done? You mum is looking up to you to play the eldest role, add discipline to it and ensure that your brother and mum are on your side. Unless the longer road of talking heartfelt to her is what you prefer. If you find the contents of that phone and its not enough leverage to make her cower, then just go prayer City!! 4 Likes 1 Share |
Re: My Younger Sister Has This Entitlement Mentality. Help I'm Scared For Her. by Nobody: 5:25pm On Mar 02, 2022 |
Raspberries: someone like the OP's sister who hate working to get some income for herself, will immediately settled for dick gobbling to get money .. What's wrong with what she said? Abi the English too hard for you to understand? Try get sense nah 15 Likes 1 Share |
Re: My Younger Sister Has This Entitlement Mentality. Help I'm Scared For Her. by Jennyclay(f): 5:28pm On Mar 02, 2022 |
Raspberries:Don't mind that @GoodHardDick he lack manners in this forum. I'm also disappointed at MadamVanessa,.. I mean, What kind of advice is that?? 15 Likes 1 Share |
Re: My Younger Sister Has This Entitlement Mentality. Help I'm Scared For Her. by Nobody: 5:31pm On Mar 02, 2022 |
GoodHardDick:Are you okay? Do you have comprehension issues? She could have offered that advice without the crude words... This is the Op's sister... Must you be rude? I wonder how you reason... Offer simple advice and you're already slut-shaming the relative of the person seeking your help... You wouldn't see this bullshit on quora... Nigerians and stupidity, like 5 and 6... If your mother was advised to not gobble dicks... Fine... But don't assume everyone else is okay with the phrase... 14 Likes 3 Shares |
Re: My Younger Sister Has This Entitlement Mentality. Help I'm Scared For Her. by Nobody: 5:37pm On Mar 02, 2022 |
Jennyclay:She's been doing this for a while... I've observed her... Every thread, she tries to sound smart by dishing out opinions that do not favour women so she gets a pat on the head from Nairaland's menfolk... On the front page, there's a thread... Women in Abuja went out to protest against inequality... For example, the foreign wives of Nigerian women can become citizens of the country but the foreign husbands of Nigerian women can not... Instead of Vanessa to comment something reasonable, she accused women of wanting to reap where they did not sow... A very stupid person... What did Nigerian men do to deserve the privilege of their foreign wives being citizens? GoodHardDick is an unintelligent fellow... I don't mind him... 20 Likes 3 Shares |
Re: My Younger Sister Has This Entitlement Mentality. Help I'm Scared For Her. by NeoWanZaeed(m): 5:47pm On Mar 02, 2022 |
Brighton1: She's slay queen 2 Likes 1 Share |
Re: My Younger Sister Has This Entitlement Mentality. Help I'm Scared For Her. by NeoWanZaeed(m): 5:49pm On Mar 02, 2022 |
Boiz she dey date and have sex is bigger than you. That's why she no respect you. Na your mom fit follow her talk 17 Likes 3 Shares |
Re: My Younger Sister Has This Entitlement Mentality. Help I'm Scared For Her. by NeoWanZaeed(m): 5:50pm On Mar 02, 2022 |
Dey hammer rituals for her ear. Say those boiz ain't smiling 4 Likes 1 Share |
Re: My Younger Sister Has This Entitlement Mentality. Help I'm Scared For Her. by lyriclekidd(m): 6:08pm On Mar 02, 2022 |
The street life has called her. Just let her be. 1 Like |
Re: My Younger Sister Has This Entitlement Mentality. Help I'm Scared For Her. by Daniel7543: 6:09pm On Mar 02, 2022 |
MadamVanessa:Madam, dis one you're just mentioning "gobbling dick" up and down. Are you h.orny? Then come to my church program tonight. #THEME.. 12 Likes 3 Shares
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Re: My Younger Sister Has This Entitlement Mentality. Help I'm Scared For Her. by Prayfortheworld: 6:16pm On Mar 02, 2022 |
My sister is 24 she have thesame mentality with your sister and honestly is eating me up. My sister has never worked before in her life, she ask my mom or me for money.. she can't buy anything for herself if you didn't buy it for her, everything she's wearing are mostly clothes i bought for her and she's still using the phone my mom bought for her 2018 I've adviced her but nothing dy enter her head. She's in higher institution I go through her phone always she's a decent girl but she don't have that hustling spirit in her. I'm just scared for her because i don't want her to suffer in her marriage. though she don't ask men for Money instead she ask me or my mom I'm tired the burden is too much. Someone that should be helping the family by now. Sometimes i just wish my mom gave birth to just me and our last born 12 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: My Younger Sister Has This Entitlement Mentality. Help I'm Scared For Her. by diogo23: 6:58pm On Mar 02, 2022 |
MadamVanessa:Please what is your advice as a woman on this issue, i read your comment and understand that you are telling him to continue giving her money 3 Likes 1 Share |
Re: My Younger Sister Has This Entitlement Mentality. Help I'm Scared For Her. by Duchessree(f): 7:10pm On Mar 02, 2022 |
Op threaten her if she don't learn a skill this period , she should forget about her school . (that means you won't be paying her fees) I know girls her age who own little brands and are working their ass off to make money . And also seat her down and advice her , there are people who if they can be in your sister shoes , they'll jump on the opportunity of someone sponsoring them to learn a skill. Talk to her , like an elder brother should. . Infact if she raise her voice on you , give am slap , them no born me well to talk anyhow to my elder brother o, especially when he's giving me better advice concerning life o 17 Likes 3 Shares |
Re: My Younger Sister Has This Entitlement Mentality. Help I'm Scared For Her. by Rachel98(f): 7:43pm On Mar 02, 2022 |
GoodHardDick: GoodHardDick:Bcus of Ur stupidity, U commented twice. Can't you give op a simple advice. All you do is insult, insult and insult. Don't you ever get tired. 15 Likes 3 Shares |
Re: My Younger Sister Has This Entitlement Mentality. Help I'm Scared For Her. by Nobody: 7:46pm On Mar 02, 2022 |
Raspberries: Ohhhhhhhhhh.... So now you know that someone can make sense without an "obscene write-up", ba? .... Yet when you're commenting on stories that has a male figure who are at fault, you conviniently forget that it's possible to make sense without being offensive ... Hypocrisy much? 11 Likes 3 Shares |
Re: My Younger Sister Has This Entitlement Mentality. Help I'm Scared For Her. by Nobody: 8:05pm On Mar 02, 2022 |
Rachel98: Let today be the first and last time you'll ever quote me again on Nairaland. 2 Likes 1 Share |
Re: My Younger Sister Has This Entitlement Mentality. Help I'm Scared For Her. by AoifeNightfall: 8:07pm On Mar 02, 2022 |
I don't think your sister has goals that motivate her. She's not ambitious enough. Maybe she'll realise herself later or never. Besides you provide everything for her so she's relaxed. This may sound a bit to strict but you should cut off her allowance for like a year and see if she'll change. She may become more hardworking or she may become worse. Whichever way you choose brother. But be careful not to do anything that might make her deeply resent you and drive her to self-destruction. Make her see (through dialogue) that her ways are not up to your standards or not right if she wants to be financially successful in life. 7 Likes 2 Shares |
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