pocohantas:


78 where? They no pass 7 o. The guy is really a good guy and shouldn’t be blamed for giving his BM N5000 a month. He can’t do pass himself!

As at when she decided to have the baby, she knew his income. Even this condom question doesn’t fly. The guy is not denying the baby and if a woman doesn’t want to have a baby, we all know she wouldn’t.

I do not see the sense in a woman saying it is her body when it pleases her, but go ahead to malign the man who wasn’t ready to have a child for not meeting up with her preferred child support.

If you want to be a BM, you as a woman should also be very prepared and the man should support too. Linda Ikeji no get two head.

@bold:

But why didn't the op just find a job for the bm while she was still with him? Even if it was just a 20k teaching job. That might have eased things a bit. Giving her money to start a business when you don't know her level of business intelligence is just like wasting money. And giving a woman 5k monthly, I really don't know what she would do with that.
I know some men will say she's not his wife just a babymama yenyenyen, but if she's good enough to sleep with, then you must be ready to be responsible, and at least assist her to stand on her feet too without putting all the burden on you. This case is somehow. Op too has his blame and he can't come here to be playing the victim. If he doesn't check where he is wrong, the same thing will repeat itself with the next woman

Cutehector:
Why didnt you use condom sir?

WTF mehn!!!

tonididdy:

Obviously you have comprehensive problems.
The OP has settled with her decision to move out, he's more consigned about the role of child custody between them.
Kappish

It's you who can't express himself in simple English that doesn't have 'comprehensive problem?'. Olodo! Go school, you sey na scam, now see as you dey shoot gun on top sey you wan express yourself. Arindin!

jayjayolajide:

it's just like u have not mature enough to know exactly what it's happened....if u can't contribute positively....u beta shut up.....keep ur month short ...u hear.....na social media give u chance

Lolz. So many illiterates on the loose today! Where did you fools escape from?

Even you too that can't type an error-free sentence dey quote somebody just to spew gibberish. Orisirisi! Go and read your Brighter Grammar please.

I doubt they did proper engagement/wedding...

u can't throw out the woman u married legally like that...

ur first attempt throwing her things out was very wrong, bro...

A responsible man doesn't do that...

BTW, u guys should know how to spend money on ur wives/baby mamas...

The money u dey spend monthly is too small to make ur woman satisfied with u and dey happy...

u know why? Women like money pass anything...

It's understandable that u cut ur coat according to ur size, but real men do well to spend good money on their women... Cos I see that ur madam too have big mouth for money, na the issue she get with u be that...

Triple ur hustle and if u like, go and thief, na u sabi... Cos when u knew u never get the full capacity to handle a home, u for definitely use condoms as other monikers stated from the 1st page of this ur post...

I always tell una, no get urself in any commitment with any woman if u want peace for urself...

Go to work. Eat want u like, fvck pussy, or get FWB and bang ur life on with her. No commitment. No child. No shiit. Just dick + condoms + pussy = pleasure... U will be fine...

But na lie, una go dey bring children come suffer for this world for nothing...

Crap....

pocohantas:


That particular one is a whole lot skewed to me. I believe the man should show responsibility. It is the noble thing to do since the child has been born. It is about the child for me.

But then, if you say your body is your body, it means you should be able to take responsibility to a very good extent.

The reward of sex mustn’t be a child. It could even be HIV and we wouldn’t be having these funny conversations. Let’s all learn to take responsibility biko.

@bold:

This is how it was traditionally done aka shotgun marriages or the family accepting the child and caring for it.

This however means there is no 'my body is my body's and other strange concepts we have today.

Brother this your story no gel. Your expenditure na 61/62k. You dey live inside the company? If yes, you dey pay rent to live inside your place of work? You no dey chop for work at all? You no dey drink beer once in a while? You no dey carry olosho? Don't angry me comrade.

The only advice i have here is that u should cut the cost of ur rentage.

Though l don't support babay mama practice but some ladies are not gratefull at all,,
Some of them will never know the value of the things they have until they lose it

djkirkoo2:
I gave her 55k for business I didn't see result rather she's saying that my baby is distracting her. Even when she was doing the business before she gets home I cook and prepare dinner so that she would be stress free. I bathe the baby, wash his clothes, even washes her clothes atimes just to relieve her of stress. Recently I called her to iron things out she gave the phone to another man

imagine nonsnse
as long as u are overly desperate to see ur son and calling them, na u dey blackmail yourself. If dey wan hide child for the next 1yr, there's nothing you can do from the tone of ur writeup.
ladies have learnt this method and it's "SIMPS" like u dey use to showcase.

try 6-8weeks challenge. Dnt call or plead. Redirect ur mind an time to ease d pain

would they try all this rubbish if u were cultist, agbero or SARS and you dey beat the girl?

U no sabi DSS, EBUBEAGU, AMOTEKUN or especially NAPTIP to arrest the family of trying to secretly traffic the baby?

Ovieemmanuel:
You see ehen you are in serious wahala only men passing through same thing would understand. Just find peace sha. Cause even if you settle with her it would be a reoccurring problem.

I am telling you bro... I really feel for him o. Same thing happened to my brother, but she is back to him. Human Rights really intervened, as they talked to the girl. Though I don't know how much they fare now, as my brother is an officer staying far North East.
So I understand the intricacies of what the OP is passing through. May God be with you, OP. I pray you really find peace with yourself and with the woman.
Maybe go to Human Rights office, try to keep an open mind and most importantly, pray about it... Oh yes, pray seriously. God bless you!

KimFab:
Baby mama? 5k? For salt abi pepper? Anyway, na mumu dey do baby mama for Nigerian men.

That aside, your rent is high o, for someone who earns 63k. Almost 4 out of 12 months is spent working for your landlord.

Who wan make you babymama both home and abroad sef.. Lmfao

djkirkoo2:
maybe you should reason with your brain and not your leg. A salary of 63k should I give her all the 63k for her upkeep or you didn't see where I stated how the money is being spent monthly? All these women Sha. As if you can finish your salary at home if you are in my shoes.

Why you replying hoes? Focus on how to get your boy man. Women will always support their kind no matter what they have done

Kronikuz:
Who wan make you babymama both home and abroad sef.. Lmfao

Lmao!

djkirkoo2:
hmmmmm. Wonderful. Me I earn 63k as salary and my rent is 210k annually. Below is how I disburse it:

Kitchen stocking - 25k.

Soup for the month (we cook soup 5 times in a month) - 15k.

Baby mama - 5k.

Light bill - 2k.

Purewater - 4k.

Stew, Beans, Moi moi: 5/6k

Gas - 5k.

Fuel: As the Lord leads but I do put on Gen almost everyday as far as there's no light.
Now if you observed you will see that I don't have any money for myself nor my baby, make sure I run other deals to meet up my rent and cater for my son.

Yet my baby mama go out to tarnish my image outside saying that I am treating her as a house girl, saying that she's like a slave, that she's in an abusive relationship this and that all the young ladies around my vicinity are all keeping malice with me because of her stories, they all believed her story.

Even when I try to talk people don't believe me. I got tired of the quarrels and nagging so I had to throw her things out and asked her to leave my house. Neighbors came in and intervened then asked me to consider my son that he's still a baby. I succumbed and left for work only for me to come back home that evening the 22nd of July and found out that she have left with my son that I love so much and yet all her things are still in my house.

Bring my baby sef all to no avail, oya let me be seeing him at least still no way. I've talked to her mom and siblings and all of them are taking her side saying a man is not supposed to throw a woman's things outside (even my family blamed me for throwing her things outside) oya I don agree sef still dey are hiding my baby that will be a year old on the 29th of this August from me.

Honestly her family wants me to settle with their daughter but to me I am no longer interested before I die of BP, so now they are using my son to blackmail me emotionally to accept their daughter back because they know that I love my son. If really I am suffering her and treating her like a slave like she always claim then I wonder why her family would want her to come back to my house to suffer.

Mind you, I don't even beat o, I only have bad mouth to reply her if she pisses me off. Honestly I am confused and don't know what to do because I really miss my son.

.
Much respect bro, from your article here, I could feel your plight and I know how it is affecting your mental health, you have done what a responsible man should, fending for an infant isn't easy talk more of an ungrateful adult, even as a family man I know what the challenges are, if she continues like this, tell her you can't kill yourself or is either she appreciates the little you provide or she look for something doing even though it teaching job, or tell her you want to take the child to your Mum so she could do the needful. Abi I lie.

FantasticJ:


I hate emotional blackmail.
This is not an advise oooo. But I will be sending 20K for my child monthly upkeep.

God help you I see my boy one day, that's the last time she will see the boy.

I don't have time for any manipulation.

Bro forget her and move on with your life get a better babe and plan together the one that has hand work not liability

Landmack:
How can someone be earning 20k and be paying rent of 400k for instance. And if we check,that tenant will have all d complete electronics in his house,plus 100k sound system he will always tune to the highest volume to regularly use to disturb neighbors
Including different women taking turns for visitations.

Life is short nah

anonimi:


Can you please provide credible sources for this your ONS story? Thanks.

what about this cleaner that use depose condom to impregnate herself and win child support

https://www.vanguardngr.com/2019/11/woman-who-impregnated-self-with-stolen-semen-from-billionaire-wins-child-support-battle/

Ishilove:

.

what will you say about this hotel cleaner that use depose condom to impregnate herself and still win child support

https://www.vanguardngr.com/2019/11/woman-who-impregnated-self-with-stolen-semen-from-billionaire-wins-child-support-battle/

djkirkoo2:
hmmmmm. Wonderful. Me I earn 63k as salary and my rent is 210k annually. Below is how I disburse it:

Kitchen stocking - 25k.

Soup for the month (we cook soup 5 times in a month) - 15k.

Baby mama - 5k.

Light bill - 2k.

Purewater - 4k.

Stew, Beans, Moi moi: 5/6k

Gas - 5k.

Fuel: As the Lord leads but I do put on Gen almost everyday as far as there's no light.
Now if you observed you will see that I don't have any money for myself nor my baby, make sure I run other deals to meet up my rent and cater for my son.

Yet my baby mama go out to tarnish my image outside saying that I am treating her as a house girl, saying that she's like a slave, that she's in an abusive relationship this and that all the young ladies around my vicinity are all keeping malice with me because of her stories, they all believed her story.

Even when I try to talk people don't believe me. I got tired of the quarrels and nagging so I had to throw her things out and asked her to leave my house. Neighbors came in and intervened then asked me to consider my son that he's still a baby. I succumbed and left for work only for me to come back home that evening the 22nd of July and found out that she have left with my son that I love so much and yet all her things are still in my house.

Bring my baby sef all to no avail, oya let me be seeing him at least still no way. I've talked to her mom and siblings and all of them are taking her side saying a man is not supposed to throw a woman's things outside (even my family blamed me for throwing her things outside) oya I don agree sef still dey are hiding my baby that will be a year old on the 29th of this August from me.

Honestly her family wants me to settle with their daughter but to me I am no longer interested before I die of BP, so now they are using my son to blackmail me emotionally to accept their daughter back because they know that I love my son. If really I am suffering her and treating her like a slave like she always claim then I wonder why her family would want her to come back to my house to suffer.

Mind you, I don't even beat o, I only have bad mouth to reply her if she pisses me off. Honestly I am confused and don't know what to do because I really miss my son.

how do you know the child is yours? You do dna. In Nigeria you are not entitled to carry child support bro. Go and focus on yourself and stop simping

Josephali:
.
Much respect bro, from your article here, I could feel your plight and I know how it is affecting your mental health, you have done what a responsible man should, fending for an infant isn't easy talk more of an ungrateful adult, even as a family man I know what the challenges are, if she continues like this, tell her you can't kill yourself or is either she appreciates the little you provide or she look for something doing even though it teaching job, or tell her you want to take the child to your Mum so she could do the needful. Abi I lie.

she has ran away with my son for over a month now

zrocky:
how do you know the child is yours? You do dna. In Nigeria you are not entitled to carry child support bro. Go and focus on yourself and stop simping

it is well

Kronikuz:
Why you replying hoes? Focus on how to get your boy man. Women will always support their kind no matter what they have done

so true. It is well.

jmichael259:


imagine nonsnse
as long as u are overly desperate to see ur son and calling them, na u dey blackmail yourself. If dey wan hide child for the next 1yr, there's nothing you can do from the tone of ur writeup.
ladies have learnt this method and it's "SIMPS" like u dey use to showcase.

try 6-8weeks challenge. Dnt call or plead. Redirect ur mind an time to ease d pain

would they try all this rubbish if u were cultist, agbero or SARS and you dey beat the girl?

U no sabi DSS, EBUBEAGU, AMOTEKUN or especially NAPTIP to arrest the family of trying to secretly traffic the baby?

soon I will face them legally

tosaino95:


In Yoruba Proverbs they use to say bad wife can be manage but bad in-law can't be manage.
Your baby mama family are part of the issue you're having her because how on earth would they be using your son to blackmailing you.
That aside your family sef no try they don't know what you're passing through with her.
And they are siding her or maybe It's woman power at work.

SOLUTION:-

You can't negotiate love between you and woman
Because it comes natural and your baby mama has none for you.
Her Living with you would always be fight and unnecessary talks.

The best you can do is to leave your boy with her but have agreement with her that you would be seeing your boy anytime you want.
That is if the boy is around 3 or 4 yrs and you don't have money for nanny.

But if your boy is 5 and above and you have money for nanny.
Do everything in your power to have the your care.

I've tried everything just to allow me see him but till today noway. She and her family are hiding him and he's just 11 months old which he'll be a year old on Monday the 29th.

djkirkoo2:
maybe you should reason with your brain and not your leg. A salary of 63k should I give her all the 63k for her upkeep or you didn't see where I stated how the money is being spent monthly? All these women Sha. As if you can finish your salary at home if you are in my shoes.

I will advise you to stop giving her any money, if you die now your baby mama and child will still survive.

Plan your life, for now forget them now and focus on yourself at least for the next 5 year.

4040nysc:

A man is supposed to have no weakness, do away with the boy and move on..those who a trapped on emotions are never successful in life according to a Chinese philosophers

it is well

djkirkoo2:
he claimed to be her boyfriend o. Honestly I couldn't sleep the night I received that insult then few days later I reported the incident to her mom then the mom claimed that the boy is her cousin. I just laughed and since that insult I didn't bother to call her again till now. It's two weeks today.

Nice One.
When the child have come of age do a DNA test.

Hamachi:
Rule 1 of setting up a business
Never give money to the person to start a business, rather start the business and ensure there is record of sales, purchases and expenses.

I learnt this from my dad.

she brought up the business plan and idea so I had to adhere.

Chopcy29:


Same thing was actually happening to me last year, thank god no child was involved. Bitch is gone now

hmm. Had it been I know things would go like this I wouldn't had allowed the pregnancy to stand.