Please I need mature minds advise on this topic.
My family recently discovered that my younger brother who has been in the seminary and was supposed to be a reverend father in few years time has a very big gambling issue.

Over the years, he has accumulated a gambling debt of 2M (borrowed majorly from loan sharks). When I discovered about the incidence, I hesitated involving my retired dad and mum because of the shock they might get hearing about this but when I discovered I couldn't pay the debt alone, i had to involve them. Thank God they handled it calmly. My dad and I have offset 700k debts already but I recently discovered that he is still borrowing and betting even recently (someone that has access to his details revealed this to me today). I am totally devastated and I don't know how to relay this to my parents to avoid heart attack. The gruesome part of the whole story is that he is JOBLESS because of his seminary school journey (which he has willingly pulled out from because of this issue).

Please my fellow nairanders, how do I handle this problem? I'm fed up

Too many gambling cases arising these days..

How do ppl get themselves involved in gambling?

These guys ain't out for ur interest as many may think. They're all out to make profit too so there's no way you can be smarter than them. The sooner you stop seeing gambling as a get rich quick scheme that wouldn't have any positive impact in ur lives and desist from it, the better...

Discovering he was owing loan sharks 2m (which he used in gambling) and repaying part of the money by u and your dad gave him temerity to borrow more and gamble.

You should have allowed him to sort himself out from the loan people. He actually went to borrow more because he believe you guys would still come to his rescue again.


Addicted gamblers need to learn in hard ways.

Him borrow from loan sharks, sharp sharp una pay 700k.

The nigga no even care e still de borrow more, since una sabi clear bills as una dey pay e dey borrow.

Continue. ☹️

Pamfresh:
Please I need mature minds advise on this topic.
My family recently discovered that my younger brother who has been in the seminary and was supposed to be a reverend father in few years time has a very big gambling issue.

Over the years, he has accumulated a gambling debt of 2M (borrowed majorly from loan sharks). When I discovered about the incidence, I hesitated involving my retired dad and mum because of the shock they might get hearing about this but when I discovered I couldn't pay the debt alone, i had to involve them. Thank God they handled it calmly. My dad and I have offset 700k debts already but I recently discovered that he is still borrowing and betting even recently (someone that has access to his details revealed this to me today). I am totally devastated and I don't know how to relay this to my parents to avoid heart attack. The gruesome part of the whole story is that he is JOBLESS because of his seminary school journey (which he has willingly pulled out from because of this issue).

Please my fellow nairanders, how do I handle this problem? I'm fed up

Hmmm. Let him carry the new cross. He will be alright las las.

There are some battles you fight to overcome by yourself, gambling is one.

He needs to learn the shame and failure that
comes with short cut to success in life so that he can some day use his testimony to preach and save souls from the spirit of gambling.
That may actually be his own calling just like Apostle Paul was pushed to take his ministry of the Good News to the Greeks and others. Check my signature for free stuffs!

Why exactly did you settle 700k out of the 2 million debt?
Repaying the 2-million loan he collected to gamble should be your least problem right now. Your bros recovery should be top-most. Otherwise, anything you’re repaying right now na waste.

You should be more concerned about how much the addiction has eaten him up to take up to 2 MILLION Naira LOAN for betting. Whatever made him accumulate such a debt in betting is apparently bigger than the debt itself.

Besides, Paying his debts would only enable his addiction.

While finding an efficient therapy for his addiction, you should allow him feel the heat of his actions.

If you keep paying up his loans without an intervention/recovery therapy, his addition severity would get worse and that’s more trouble for you and your aged parents.

FreeStuffsNG:

Hmmm. Let him carry the new cross. He will be alright las las.

There are some battles you fight to overcome by yourself, gambling is one.

He needs to learn the shame and failure that
comes with short cut to success in life some day he can save souls from the spirit of gambling. That may actually be his own calling just like Apostle Paul was pushed to take his ministry of the Good News to the Greeks and others.

The only issue is that he borrows with his family members details. First was our last born, now I discovered he borrowed with my Dad's details as well. The loan shark ppl ve bn calling and harassing them to pay up. If not for the harassment, I would ve allowd him wallow in his mess

Kul3ger:
Why exactly did you settle 700k out of the 2 million debt?
Repaying the 2-million loan he collected to gamble should be your least problem right now. Your bros recovery should be. Otherwise, anything you’re repaying right now na waste.

You should be more concerned about how much the addiction has eaten him up to take up to 2 MILLION Naira LOAN for betting. Whatever made him accumulate such a debt in betting is apparently bigger than the debt itself.

Besides, Paying his debts would only enable his addiction.

While finding an efficient therapy for his addiction, you should allow him feel the heat of his actions.

If you keep paying up his loans without an intervention/recovery therapy, his addition severity would get worse and that’s more trouble for you and your aged parents.

What kind of help do u suggest please. We only paid up the much we can now because of loan interest accumulation

Person wey una supposed go arrest and send to police for even disparaging the family name,u guys went and paid part of his liabilities.

Una try.

Pamfresh:


The only issue is that he borrows with his family members details. First was our last born, now I discovered he borrowed with my Dad's details as well. The loan shark ppl ve bn calling and harassing them to pay up. If not for the harassment, I would ve allowd him wallow in his mess

That's stealing people's information and using it in a manner that will hurt them. There's a criminal element that you just admitted to and may be actively participating and enabling such crime. It is stealing and your effort should be within the frameworks of the law.

You should lodge an official complaint with the police while you still do your family meetings. In fact, they should arrest him and you guys bail him when he signs undertaking.

There's a lot you don't know about him and ignorance is not an excuse for breaking the law.

Pamfresh:


What kind of help do u suggest please. We only paid up the much we can now because of loan interest accumulation

Honestly, I'm not a professional in addiction intervention/recovery therapy, but i think several factors would determine the best intervention; including:

His age----If he's too old to be controlled, that may be a greater concern

Is he fully dependent on you/your family for accommodation and survival? --- If yes, i believe you can moderate his excesses, limiting his access to money, etc

Now he's out of seminary, is he willing to venture into something also promising that'll keep him engaged, possibly within monitored environments? I think being idle would do him great harm right now.

Is the family financially buoyant to invest in a new career path for him? That may include sending him abroad for studies. ---believing a change of environment may help.

Then, I'm not sure how that works but I guess there should be in-patient rehabs in Nigeria that admit addicts for supervised round-the-clock treatments.

Like I said, I'm no pro, I'm just concerned and trying to be logical.

Gambling, as with all forms of addiction, can ruin one's life. Hence, professionals always preach early intervention. Make una try act fast. Wishing you all the best!

From a clinical point of view, he needs to have Cognitive Behavioural Therapy sessions with a psychotherapist for talk therapy and getting his mind prepared to go see a psychiatrist.

The Psychiatrist will assess to ascertain if there are mental health issues that is triggering his compulsive gambling and I am 100% certain there is/are. XXXXXX medication would be prescribed to help moderate the compulsiveness.

Look around to see if there are recovering gamblers' groups and get him to join one.

The best is to have him buy into getting into residential treatment program and stay in the rehab for at least a month.

But all that is listed above will not be effective, if your brother do not have the will to quit gambling....it is a very difficulty journey.

Pamfresh:
■ The gruesome part of the whole story is that he is JOBLESS because of his seminary school journey (which he has willingly pulled out from because of this issue). Please my fellow nairanders, how do I handle this problem? I'm fed up

Does the seminary not offer mental health counseling services for people even with problems of addiction? Look into it and first get your brother into a treatment program as soon as possible. Then demand your brother get a job immediately since his seminary dreams have been put on hold thanks to his shenanigans. That way he can earn money which he can then use to pay for his treatment and his debt. Arrange to have his salary wired directly to pay off his debts if possible and work with him so he sticks to doing the work no matter what. If he is old enough to take out loans and gamble, he should be old enough to pay it off. But, please, and please, make sure he sticks to his treatment/counseling no matter what, or he will probably fall back in with his old demons.

Kul3ger:


Honestly, I'm not a professional in addiction intervention/recovery therapy, but i think several factors would determine the best intervention; including:

His age----If he's too old to be controlled, that may be a greater concern

Is he fully dependent on you/your family for accommodation and survival? --- If yes, i believe you can moderate his excesses, limiting his access to money, etc

Now he's out of seminary, is he willing to venture into something also promising that'll keep him engaged, possibly within monitored environments? I think being idle would do him great harm right now.

Is the family financially buoyant to invest in a new career path for him? That may include sending him abroad for studies. ---believing a change of environment may help.

Then, I'm not sure how that works but I guess there should be in-patient rehabs in Nigeria that admit addicts for supervised round-the-clock treatments.

Like I said, I'm no pro, I'm just concerned and trying to be logical.

Gambling, as with all forms of addiction, can ruin one's life. Hence, professionals always preach early intervention. Make una try act fast. Wishing you all the best!

Thank you. I picked up somethings here that would help

Kobojunkie:
Does the seminary not offer mental health counseling services for people even with problems of addiction? Look into it and first get your brother into a treatment program as soon as possible. Then demand your brother get a job immediately since his seminary dreams have been put on hold thanks to his shenanigans. That way he can earn money which he can then use to pay for his treatment and his debt. Arrange to have his salary wired directly to pay off his debts if possible and work with him so he sticks to doing the work no matter what. If he is old enough to take out loans and gamble, he should be old enough to pay it off. But, please, and please, make sure he sticks to his treatment/counseling no matter what, or he will probably fall back in with his old demons.

The seminary doesn't even know about his addiction. We hope to get him a job as soon as he's done with service next yr since he's done with philosophy. The problem is that he's still borrowing to bet and he's 28 yrs old. How do I control an adult. If not for my parents, I would ve left him to his faith

Pamfresh:
■ The seminary doesn't even know about his addiction. We hope to get him a job as soon as he's done with service next yr since he's done with philosophy. The problem is that he's still borrowing to bet and he's 28 yrs old. How do I control an adult. If not for my parents, I would ve left him to his faith

Find out if the seminary offers such mental health services first. If they do maybe they can at least help get him into a treatment program if and only if he is willing to be free of that foolishness.

If he still borrowing to bet, he is probably not done with being foolish and there isn't much you can do about it. He has to first want to change before change can happen to him.

Pamfresh:
Please I need mature minds advise on this topic.
My family recently discovered that my younger brother who has been in the seminary and was supposed to be a reverend father in few years time has a very big gambling issue.

Over the years, he has accumulated a gambling debt of 2M (borrowed majorly from loan sharks). When I discovered about the incidence, I hesitated involving my retired dad and mum because of the shock they might get hearing about this but when I discovered I couldn't pay the debt alone, i had to involve them. Thank God they handled it calmly. My dad and I have offset 700k debts already but I recently discovered that he is still borrowing and betting even recently (someone that has access to his details revealed this to me today). I am totally devastated and I don't know how to relay this to my parents to avoid heart attack. The gruesome part of the whole story is that he is JOBLESS because of his seminary school journey (which he has willingly pulled out from because of this issue).

Please my fellow nairanders, how do I handle this problem? I'm fed up

One of the ways the devil use to tarnish one's destiny is through betting. Your brother wants to be rich. The devil saw it and capitalised on that.
1. Let your brother dedicate his life to Christ Jesus.
2. Let him destroy every desire to be rich. Let his desires for God supercede every other desires.
3. Let him trust God to provide for him.

I don't see any other therapy that works better than these.
With time, you brother will recover. The debts will be paid and he will testify.
If he doesn't do these, you guys should prepare for the worst. Betting is a terrible demon that doesn't leave his victims.

terrezo2002:
■ One of the ways the devil use to tarnish one's destiny is through betting. Your brother wants to be rich. The devil saw it and capitalised on that.
1. Let your brother dedicate his life to Christ Jesus.
2. Let him destroy every desire to be rich. Let his desires for God supercede every other desires.
3. Let him trust God to provide for him.
I don't see any other therapy that works better than these.
With time, you brother will recover. The debts will be paid and he will testify.
If he doesn't do these, you guys should prepare for the worst. Betting is a terrible demon that doesn't leave his victims.

Pamfresh, please ignore all those who come at you claiming Jesus Christ and God can do this and that if you do this and that. This is akin to trading one lie for another lie. You don't get rid of delusions that way. What your brother needs is to work on his financial discipline and Jesus Christ does not do that kind of magic for any man.

Your brother was already in seminary school and that didn't stop his undisciplined life from catching up with him. So, pouring more religious bullsheets on him will only leave him locked in a cycle that may never end.

AsomArchitectNG:
Too many gambling cases arising these days..

How do ppl get themselves involved in gambling?

These guys ain't out for ur interest as many may think. They're all out to make profit too so there's no way you can be smarter than them. The sooner you stop seeing gambling as a get rich quick scheme that wouldn't have any positive impact in ur lives and desist from it, the better...

Gambling cases is circulating here every day, I am happy because people can see the true and it is high time they stop before it ruins.

I pray ur brother receive divine healing from gambling and betting evil force. May this gambling evil spirit stop being his portion......can somebody shout Amen

Rajman45:
I pray ur brother receive divine healing from gambling and betting evil force. May this gambling evil spirit stop being his portion......can somebody shout Amen

Stop that nonsense! Gambling is no spirit and Gambling in and of itself is not evil nor bad. The boy lacks financial discipline and that is how he ended up in gambling debt. If he can discipline himself enough, he can easily get a handle on the problem.

I'm addicted to sporty too but my own na 1-1k ticket

Na wa, imagine sey him later become Father.

He should work and pay up his debt

Never gamble more than you can't afford to loose...

I need a brother like you seriously.

So you mean if I go and mess up, you will clean up the mess for me? If I borrow money from the bank, you will pay.

God is your strength.

Kobojunkie:
Pamfresh, please ignore all those who come at you claiming Jesus Christ and God can do this and that if you do this and that. This is akin to trading one lie for another lie. You don't get rid of delusions that way. What your brother needs is to work on his financial discipline and Jesus Christ does not do that kind of magic for any man.

Your brother was already in seminary school and that didn't stop his undisciplined life from catching up with him. So, pouring more religious bullsheets on him will only leave him locked in a cycle that may never end.

Satanic agent

terrezo2002:
Satanic agent

Abeg get away with your many phantoms that haunt you lot.

Oyindidi:
Na wa, imagine sey himself later become Father.

He should work and pay up his debt

He knows, reason he dropped out after Philosophy. If he had made it through Theology and got ordained...he would descend so low to borrowing from Parishioners to gamble.

Seeing this post, just gave me a flashback of something I keep regretting.
It is well sha.

Kobojunkie:
Abeg get away with your many phantoms that haunt you lot.

Tell that to your master the devil

terrezo2002:
■ Tell that to your master the devil

Here's the problem. People typically hyperfocus their energies on the idea or being that is god/master over their lives. The major reason why you churchians focus your attentions and energies—hyperfocus —on devils and demons has to do with the fact that these ideas sit as masters over your persons. That you have not even realized it at this point speaks volumes of the kind of blindness required here.

How can one whom I don't even acknowledge or pay heed to be master over me?

Kobojunkie:
Here's the problem. People typically hyperfocus their energies on the idea of being that is god/master over their lives. The major reason why you churchians focus your attentions and energies—hyperfocus —on devils and demons has to do with the fact that these ideas sit as masters over your persons. That you have not even realized it at this point speaks volumes of the kind of blindness required here.

How can one whom I don't even acknowledge or pay heed to be master over me?