yewit37486:


The universe trying to protect him indeed. Why couldn't he protect himself by exercising self control and restraining himself from DV? Smh

It's also interesting that some people are making comments like "I wish he didn't admit it online" but not "I wish he had controlled himself and not beaten her". Speaks volumes. They are okay with DV but just keep it hush hush. What a shame.

yewit37486:


Interesting how you are writing epistles to defend someone who is a "strong APC supporter" simply because you like him, but same you was cussing people out and accusing them of being APC simply they had a different opinion on japa. Just like the odanz guy has proved, hypocrisy is truly a thing.

As for J, he has laid his bed and he now has to lie on it.

Tightpussy2024:
if you don't know , Lagos, is now the new USA as regards to SV and DV. A school was almost shut down when a man commented on a staff breast. Lagos is not smiling now. Even if the case is not carried out. He may be made to pay heavily to his wife

GTCO:






This life Sha. I remember when she was boasting that she paid that guy's school fees. I kept wondering if it was true or a lie.
Alas even aunty naa begger. A professional one at that. no wonder she was always against competitors in the Begging Industry

Thia nairaland na something Ajeh

Beremx:
it is well o! You can imagine? Polygamy wouldn't stop him from cheating anyway. Las las he will marry four wives. The lust he used in marrying a second wife, he'll use it to marry a third and fourth.

Nonsense

Iamblessed85:


It’s not in my place to comment because Jarus is a solid individual. However, for me, it’s not even the DV per se. We all know that was wrong and most likely a mistake. It’s her diabolic activity that is more worrisome. She most likely would have been into it for a while now. Would you live with such a person?

How come you’re condemning the DV but turning a blind eye to a potential ritualist?

Iamblessed85:


It’s not in my place to comment because Jarus is a solid individual. However, for me, it’s not even the DV per se. We all know that was wrong and most likely a mistake. It’s her diabolic activity that is more worrisome. She most likely would have been into it for a while now. Would you live with such a person?

How come you’re condemning the DV but turning a blind eye to a potential ritualist?

Gerrard59:


I am not defending him because I like him. I am defending his right to do what his religion supports. I don't have to like Islam or any Muslim, but I will support your right to do what is legally permissible by your religion.

Proserpina:
I will respond to this because I believe you are one of the few people with balanced view on this forum. Lol I don't "chook" mouth in family matter but at the same time there's a need to correct this notion.

The only dishonesty here is you neglecting the effect of taking up a second wife on a woman. And you expect a woman to be just fine with it because religion permits it. I have a question. Do you do or accept everything your religion dictates? Do you flitter out what you think is not right and acceptable while you stick with what you seem doable? Do you renounce Christianity and switch to other religion? If you don't live 100% a Christian but still maintain the religion while do you think a Muslim woman who can't live 100% a Muslim should renounce her religion? Hypocrisy much? This is me assuming you are a Christian because of your name.

Point 2. Let's say you go into partnership with a very good friend of yours to start a business on a 40-60 profit sharing percentage. After 14 years of sacrifice and labour and the business is finally paying off your friend decided bring in another partner who will invest little to nothing but share your 40% profit with you.Note your friend brings in this new partner not for financial/ business contributions but for personal reasons. How would you genuinely feel? Accept it without making any fuss? To make this more relatable, Partnership= Marriage, A good friend of yours = Jarius , Business= Home/Family , New partner= Second wife. I hope you understand why women don't easily accept second wives even if they had been told before they were born.

According to some account online, J's first wife had been there for him when he had nothing. He mentioned a case of selling her gold to celebrate a festival or something. That shows how much this woman loves and sacrifice for her husband, are you saying she shouldn't have gone that far and held some of her love, support and kindness since she's aware a new wife would join later so she won't get hurt? . Maybe y'all don't see the implications of what you type here. Here's your logic. "As a Muslim woman don't be 100% devoted to your husband because he is not for you alone"

I see both J and wife are very advanced in age. They are from the time where genuine love and companionship exist instead of them to cherish that, they want a 22 year old faargin to ruin what they have. Lol Their choice really... I don't care. My problem is , don't downplay a woman's feelings and emotions because you believe a religion gives you the permission to be selfish. She's right to object and hurt. If you want to exercise your Islamic right do it when you had nothing so you all can build together. That's my grouse.

islamics:


Women can also file for divorce in Islam
though it is disliked. But she can file for divorce if the husband is not meeting his responsibilities and fulfilling her rights and she can't bear with him.
If the husband doesn't accept, then if the wife is able to convince the judge/Imam, the marriage can be dissolved. That the women are silent doesn't mean they don't know their right. Some might be naive while some are trying to keep up with the husband.

cococandy:


Will you support slavery because the Bible allows it? Even to the point of saying the servants should submit to cruel masters because God commands it. I mean it’s clearly outlined in different versions.

Do we not practice religion anymore with a heart and conscience rather than hurting other people because a man from many centuries ago told us that’s what God told him?

Gerrard59:


Yes, she has the right to be hurt, but not use juju when he hates it.

descarado:
Nobody has come with the answer why a great Islamic nation Turkey made polygamy a crime?

You see intelligent quotient, that's what makes great men and women then a great nation. Intelligence is knowing when to let go of some old practices that were there for a reason and served its purpose which is no longer needed.


You know why I love uk despite their being our coloniser?
They keep on amending their constitutions when they know it does not serve its purpose anymore.

That is what development is all about.
An Islamic country Tajikistan recently banned jihad. That is reformation and curbing extremism.
Saudi Arabia recently did swim suit fashion show.


But my dear country with its men of extremely low intelligent quotient always think about themselves.
What benefits only them and how they are doing the world of favour to their children and women.
I have never seen men with so much little self worth. They need to validate their actions to show they are the men.
If our upbringing produced men like this day in day out, the family failed woefully.

U see all the beating,screaming and shouting by parents and who should not put mouth in children's upbringing, the effect is what we witness daily in Nigeria and why Nigeria is where it is.
Don't let me start with Christianity

Gerrard59:


Again, nothing will happen. Jarus is a rich Yoruba Muslim man. Maybe you have to read his history of supporting APC - the governing party in Lagos and Nigeria.

Nothing will happen. If Jarus was Igbo, yes, something will happen. It happened to Bebex, an illiterate but rich Igbo trader, who harassed a Yoruba woman in public. Initially, he used money to solve the matter. But Ronu advocates resurrected the matter because he is Igbo and tagged the DV division. He is free as I write. Why? Bebex is rich.

Most of you people need to understand how humans behave. This lovey-dovey approach to life is unrealistic.

absoluteSuccess:
women are about the strongest of our kind, their vulnerability is not because they are weak somehow, no. For a woman to carry a pregnancy to term, I think she is the one who does a lot of the work of procreation, and as a family, man is to fend for and defend the house.

There are crazy things we say every now and then to relegate one another, but we are equal before God originally. Yes the woman must be obedient to her husband, that is absolute. But for that to be, the husband must be a source of peace and provision for the home.

Marriage is a contract, I can't ask my neighbour's wife to be obedient to me because she is a woman.

Respect is not for a given, it is earned even in a marriage. If you have a wife that respects you in spite of your shortcomings, she is a kind person by nature. It doesn't mean that's the standard and don't use it as standard. Instead, be responsible and considerate with yours.

Sapasenator:


It's a private site and Seun is not an elected public official and does not owe you or anyone any duty of care whatsoever.

Gerrard59:


Again, Ms Coco, that is the business of Muslims. I am not a Muslim neither are you one. Muslims who wants to change/reform Islam are free to do so. Non-Muslims who want to the same should convert to Islam. Reformists within Christianity reformed Christianity. Muslim reformers should do so, not outsiders.

PrinceofAgoAre:


What .. I don't think ahnie has ever given 1000n to someone on this forum not to talk of paying anyone's school fees..


The lady is all talk and no do .. silentgroper see am finish..

jaybee3:


Just to be clear, i’m anti polygamy!!!

To answer your question, the sura was given at the time when they engaged in constant wars which obviously resulted in widowers and orphans. Considering men was also the main/only breadwinner at the time, it made sense for this widowers to be paired by responsible men would could afford and follow the just conditions

However, times are different and selfish religious people are often comfortable taking doctrines out of context or ignorantly falling to evolve their ways in line with current realities

descarado:

Tell the Nigerian police that's already neck deep in the matter that one.
He use im mouth talk say im beat his wife.
Goodluck to him
Punch newspaper don carry the matter too.

Wonder how much he has in his account that you considered him rich.
And b3cuase he is rich according to you, he can beat his wife.
What a fish brain

hyzich:
Sir Jarus ignorantly admitted to domestic violence while explaining why he’s taking second wife. Lagos DSVA has also weighed in. See pics below

https://x.com/SegunAdeni51298/status/1806690374154416323?t=xfpSoxpKRukUcTaSUg-iHQ&s=19

Mods ( royalroy ) please push to frontpage

Gerrard59:


Again, nothing will happen. Jarus is a rich Yoruba Muslim man. Maybe you have to read his history of supporting APC - the governing party in Lagos and Nigeria.

Nothing will happen. If Jarus was Igbo, yes, something will happen. It happened to Bebex, an illiterate but rich Igbo trader, who harassed a Yoruba woman in public. Initially, he used money to solve the matter. But Ronu advocates resurrected the matter because he is Igbo and tagged the DV division. He is free as I write. Why? Bebex is rich.

Most of you people need to understand how humans behave. This lovey-dovey approach to life is unrealistic.

Iamblessed85:


Another angle. What if she is FatherChristmas?

yewit37486:


A mistake is not something that happens repeatedly, even his wife months back on an online account mentioned he BEATS her, wasn't a one off occurrence, which he also confirmed by his reference to a 'couple of times'.

The moment he found out she was fetish and it was something he couldn't live with, he should have sent her packing, not pummel her to pieces.

cococandy:

Obviously it’s their business
But I’m referring to your post of supporting what people do of their religion permits it. Would you support a Christian slave owner? Clearly Christianity permits it.
Why are you cherry picking which religion you’ll support?

Gerrard59:


I do not support slavery in any form neither based on religion because in Christianity, my religion, it has been outlawed. By whom? Christians. Muslims should do whatever they want in Islam. It is their religion. I respect their right to do what they want provided it is legal in the country. In the country's constitution, it is permissible to marry more than one wife as a Muslim. In fact, in parts of Delta where Christianity is the dominant religion, three wives are permissible. Marrying another wife is not a criminal offence.

I have outlined solutions to the main issue. Korean women are doing theirs. Nigerian women or American women did not tell them what they to do. Muslim women should do what they want. They have the right to choose, just as their men. I will always support people's legal choices. I don't have to like you, but I will support your right to choose.

Omoawoke:


Women have serious problem walahi!

Women are naturally full of envy and cannot tolerate the thoughts of another woman sharing their gbola with them, and the natural order is for a male to copulate as many female as possible. That’s why one single male can fertilize an entire army of females, it’s all natural.
Women should stop unnecessary jealousy and learn to share

Iamblessed85:


DV is wrong but a victim is not an angel either. Question is, what did she do to provoke such a peace loving guy into violence? Can you imagine how it made Jarus feel to have to go to such extent? I think he is even the real victim here. ?

Lastly, if Jarus were your brother or son, wouldn’t you be happy that the evil woman has been exposed before you reprimand him for hitting her?

descarado:
Nobody has come with the answer why a great Islamic nation Turkey made polygamy a crime?

You see intelligent quotient, that's what makes great men and women then a great nation. Intelligence is knowing when to let go of some old practices that were there for a reason and served its purpose which is no longer needed.


You know why I love uk despite their being our coloniser?
They keep on amending their constitutions when they know it does not serve its purpose anymore.

That is what development is all about.
An Islamic country Tajikistan recently banned jihad. That is reformation and curbing extremism.
Saudi Arabia recently did swim suit fashion show.


But my dear country with its men of extremely low intelligent quotient always think about themselves.
What benefits only them and how they are doing the world of favour to their children and women.
I have never seen men with so much little self worth. They need to validate their actions to show they are the men.
If our upbringing produced men like this day in day out, the family failed woefully.

U see all the beating,screaming and shouting by parents and who should not put mouth in children's upbringing, the effect is what we witness daily in Nigeria and why Nigeria is where it is.
Don't let me start with Christianity

Iamblessed85:


DV is wrong but a victim is not an angel either. Question is, what did she do to provoke such a peace loving guy into violence? Can you imagine how it made Jarus feel to have to go to such extent? I think he is even the real victim here.

Do i support that he put his hands on her? NO
Do i think he was instigated into doing so? YES
Do i believe he has it in him to be a wife beater? NO
Do i think the issue of strange rituals carried out by the wife is weightier than the DV? YES
Would i ever be able to live with such a woman again? NO

Meanwhile, i hope you know this issue of visiting talismen is very common with women? The average woman or her Mum knows all the spiritualists in town. What do they gain from such wickedness?

Lastly, if Jarus were your brother or son, wouldn’t you be happy that the evil woman has been exposed before you reprimand him for hitting her?

cococandy:
You don’t have problem with domestic violence because the perpetrator is a “solid” individual ? What makes him solid?

But you have a problem with someone practicing their native religion as a recourse?

Beremx:
would you advise your dad to take another wife while your mother is still alive? You think it's only women that are jealous? Children from the first wife are also jealous. Anything you can't do, don't advise someone else to do it. I mean, why wouldn't women be jealous? Why?