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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / What It Feels Like To Come From A Broken Home. (11455 Views)
My Wife Feels Little Or No Urge For Intimacy... Please Advice / Man Feels Guilty Everytime His Wife Reigns Curses On The Men Who Raped Her. / Guys, Can You Get Married To A Lady From A Broken Home?(separated Or Divorced). (2) (3) (4)
What It Feels Like To Come From A Broken Home. by Ayoolajumoke(f): 1:14pm On Nov 04, 2014 |
It's been fifteen years ago that my dad left my mom with three kids, two boys and a girl, my younger bro was only 6months old and I was only three years old. It isn't easy living without a father, my mom did all she could to bring us to where we are now, sometimes we go on empty stomach, bought clothes for us twice in a year and so many things that didn't make a good living, she works most times as a maid just to make sure our education is secured (she never remarried ). I feel bad whenever I see my friends talk about their dads and I curse my dad each time I remember everything we've been through that even made me hate men. All hope isn't lost as I'm now in my second year in the University, wishing to make my mom proud of me. I thank God for blessing me with that kinda mom. Anybody from a broken home can as well share his/her experience. 30 Likes |
Re: What It Feels Like To Come From A Broken Home. by kilokeys(m): 1:35pm On Nov 04, 2014 |
I wouldnt say I know what it feels like.. ill be lying but i am so glad u are in the university... ull learn abt fallacies.. esp the fallacy of generalising we have good men out there. be open minded I didnt want to comment initially. but u want to be a better person, dont u? so having pple spill their sad tales wouldnt help u. believe u would have it better.. and so shall it be. cheers 24 Likes |
Re: What It Feels Like To Come From A Broken Home. by pickabeau1: 1:41pm On Nov 04, 2014 |
Your mum has done well youve done well What u need to do now - excel in your studies and graduate with good grades - Be circumspect in your marital choice so your kids dont experience the same thing - Dont neglect your mum in her old age 16 Likes 1 Share |
Re: What It Feels Like To Come From A Broken Home. by Ayoolajumoke(f): 1:55pm On Nov 04, 2014 |
pickabeau1: I dare not neglect her, thanks sir ![]() pickabeau1: I dare not neglect her, thanks sir. 6 Likes |
Re: What It Feels Like To Come From A Broken Home. by Nobody: 2:03pm On Nov 04, 2014 |
Ayoolajumoke: Am so sorry for what you went through I cant tell you how to react but i can only advice: hate is a negative emotion, curses at him wont change what happened. Not all men are bad or inconsiderate, there are great men out there. Open your mind as well as your eyes, be diligent and hardworking. Some mothers also run and leave the kids with their grandmothers and go and do what ever they want thankfully mama stayed and as hard as it was made life a lot more bearable for you and your sibblings. Please do well in school, don't just cram but read to understand also learn a skill in your spare time. In life there will always be something people have that we may not have thats life. When next people talk about their dads and you feel bad instead of cursing thank God for your health your mom and sibblings. It will end ib praise 18 Likes |
Re: What It Feels Like To Come From A Broken Home. by Kanwulia: 2:17pm On Nov 04, 2014 |
It feels great! ![]() ABEG TOK FOR YASEF O! ![]() Love is not by force! My mom built own her house DOWN THE STREET from my dad's house . . . . .she was only 24. . . . WITH 4 kids! ![]() AND COULD SHOW UP AT ANY TIME. . . . .day or night to harass any one who DARED to give us any wahala o!!!!! ![]() They both were in competition to give us THE BEST! I did not miss NATIN!!!! ![]() DIVORCE does not mean abandon your children abi? It was THE BEST DECISION MY PARENTS MADE! They were soooooooo incomPATIble!!!! ![]() That marriage only took place because of pregnancy with my older brother who never survived! Just to do the right thing! My dad loooooooooooved my mom . . . But my mom did not love my dad!(MAGA MUST PAY! ![]() I still lived the best of lives compared to many so-called "unbroken" homes! My father was the single parent!!!!! HE NEVER RE-MARRIED!!!! Unlike ALL NIGERIAN MEN PURSUING TOTO ALL OVER HELL AND HADES! Guess who built his mansion in his village? MY MOM!!!! 25 million Naira. . . Cash!!!!! This was 15 year before he died o! To thank him for raising her SUPER WELL-BEHAVED KIDS!!!! Should I tell you about the last visit my dad made to my mom's home before he died. . . . He even ate HOT EBA AND OKRO SOUP DIA KE. JUST TO THANK HER? ![]() HALLELUJAH!!!!!!! ![]() 25 Likes 1 Share |
Re: What It Feels Like To Come From A Broken Home. by thorpido(m): 2:26pm On Nov 04, 2014 |
It doesn't matter how you were born or how life was growing up.You are here now. Make the best of your present situation.Your education is going on fine and God has been helping your mum to pull through.Keep working hard to graduate with good grades. Not all men are bad,matter of fact there are many good ones.Your dad is not a standard for men.You will need to understand and imbibe this else it will affect your relationships with the opposite sex.You don't want to end up like your parents do you? 5 Likes 1 Share |
Re: What It Feels Like To Come From A Broken Home. by Ayoolajumoke(f): 2:32pm On Nov 04, 2014 |
Kanwulia: Uhmm, good for you. You didn't lose anything bcoz both of them provided for your needs, at least you see both of them often. lol, I bet you wouldn't want to experience mine. 3 Likes |
Re: What It Feels Like To Come From A Broken Home. by achinaboy(m): 2:38pm On Nov 04, 2014 |
yeah thank God that u are where u are now,thanks to ur mum too,,as others said ,anger will lead u no where,,ur dad will always be ur dad nomatter what, same to ur mum,,i know this may sound stupid,,but at ur own convinient, try to meet ur dad if u can,and ask him what really happened that made him leave,,u might be surprise on what he got to say,,but no amount of reason is enough to abandon ur kids,,but just try and meet him,,thas my advice 2 Likes |
Re: What It Feels Like To Come From A Broken Home. by Kanwulia: 2:40pm On Nov 04, 2014 |
Ayoolajumoke: That is the point! YOUR FATHER NEVER LOVED YOU! He walked out on you! HIS CHOICE! The problem is YOUR FATHER, not "a broken home"! ![]() Nothing wrong with broken homes, if the children are LOVED AND CARED FOR BY BOTH PARENTS! WE ALL LEARNED SELF-RESPECT AND HOW TO DEAL WITH REJECTION!!! LOVE IS NOT BY FORCE! ![]() There are "MANY UNBROKEN" homes were the children are ABANDONED by both parents who still CLAIMED TO BE YOLKED BY POVERTY OR POLYGAMY(PSEUDO-MARRIAGES). . . . .aka SHIARRRRRRING TOTOS AND BLOKOSES! ![]() I will still prefer my situation 100%!!!! The 4 children are THE ONLY CHILDREN FROM MY PARENTS!!!!!!! We grew up to be EMOTIONALLY-FORMIDABLE. . . . . .AND LEARNED TO LOVE ONLY THOSE WHO LOVED US!!!! ![]() We did not miss NATIN!!!! Amen!!!!! ![]() 19 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: What It Feels Like To Come From A Broken Home. by Ayoolajumoke(f): 2:48pm On Nov 04, 2014 |
achinaboy: oh oh, I won't even love to see him again let alone talk with him, my brothers even hate him more than I do. Thanks for the advice. 2 Likes |
Re: What It Feels Like To Come From A Broken Home. by achinaboy(m): 3:00pm On Nov 04, 2014 |
Ayoolajumoke:well i tried,ur brothers even hates him more than u do,,why,,let me answer the question,,because he left u all,,,why did he left? when people asks u this question in future what will be ur answer? well good luk with everthing God is on ur side 4 Likes |
Re: What It Feels Like To Come From A Broken Home. by Kanwulia: 3:07pm On Nov 04, 2014 |
Ayoolajumoke: Why are you trying to contact a SPPPPPERM-DONOR who does not care for you? ![]() You think blood is alway thicker than water? ![]() MOST AFRICAN/NIGERIAN men only have COOLAID running through their veins o! The color is red abi? Na blood you call am? Are you trying to be ungrateful to your mom? You have issues! Please, deal with them and don't go looking for A MAN that does not care about your existence! Thank you! ![]() 19 Likes 1 Share |
Re: What It Feels Like To Come From A Broken Home. by acenazt: 3:09pm On Nov 04, 2014 |
Post cleared. 7 Likes 1 Share |
Re: What It Feels Like To Come From A Broken Home. by Ayoolajumoke(f): 3:17pm On Nov 04, 2014 |
Kanwulia: Thank you bro! My thought exactly, he is just a sperm donor, and someone was telling me sometime ago that he will come back to his family when we are grown ups, I was like WTF, he dares not. 2 Likes |
Re: What It Feels Like To Come From A Broken Home. by Ayoolajumoke(f): 3:22pm On Nov 04, 2014 |
acenazt: Eeyah! 1 Like |
Re: What It Feels Like To Come From A Broken Home. by Kanwulia: 3:33pm On Nov 04, 2014 |
Ayoolajumoke: SEE? You are still suffering emotionally from his abandonment, and rightly so. Maybe if I were raised by a SINGLE MOM, I would identify with your sentiments of anger and rejection. You never REALLY knew your dad. . . . So, I cannot understand why you the SONS keep having such levels of hostility towards "A STRANGER"! If he comes back. . . .You simply say hello. . . And be polite! He is coming on his own free will. Let his conscience ride him. Simple!!! ![]() I see you guys are growing up to be angry men. If you are not careful, you WILL TRIPEAT the cycle of abandonment with your own wives! It is ok to be hurt and learn to MOVE ON! ![]() What is not ok. . . . . Is to be HURT AND HATEFUL! You guys should check yourselves and your NEGATIVE EMOTIONS before you become damaged for LIFE! Learning to deal with rejection is just as easy as learning to deal with acceptance. The only problem is YOUR CHOICE!!!! ![]() Hardship and adversity should never define your personality. . . .ESPECIALLY WHEN YOU ARE WINNING! You need to stick with making MAMA proud. . . .stop hating YOUR LIFE! ![]() 29 Likes 1 Share |
Re: What It Feels Like To Come From A Broken Home. by Nobody: 3:40pm On Nov 04, 2014 |
Kanwulia: Word! 3 Likes 1 Share |
Re: What It Feels Like To Come From A Broken Home. by haftob(m): 4:29pm On Nov 04, 2014 |
What if he shows up when u wanna wed, won't u accept him? Abi someone sha has to sit as ur father, will anoda person now sit as ur father wen ur biological father is there at the event? U just have to accept it as God's will, dat's how God has destined u ppl's path. I pray u guys will pay bak ur mum in good and may she also live long to eat the fruits of her labour. 3 Likes |
Re: What It Feels Like To Come From A Broken Home. by Ayoolajumoke(f): 5:02pm On Nov 04, 2014 |
haftob: I don't even wanna think about it. Amen to your prayer. 1 Like |
Re: What It Feels Like To Come From A Broken Home. by Temibassie(f): 6:02pm On Nov 04, 2014 |
Op,I feel your pain because I also come from a broken home,the only difference is that my dad didnt abandon us but honestly my dear mum(God bless her soul) went through hell raising the 3 of us singlehandedly, depriving herself of basic comforts of life just to make sure we turn out well. Sadly she died shortly after I graduated and till date,I ask God why He permitted her to leave when it was time for her to reap the fruit of her labour. As for my dad,I don't hate him(though it takes the grace of God not to do that) but he cannot impose His needs on me,I assist him when/if I want. My advice to you,is to face your studies,(ranti omo tio oje) and God will perfect that which concerns you and always pray for good health and long life for your mom,she deserves to live in comfort after all the stress. Peace!!! 8 Likes |
Re: What It Feels Like To Come From A Broken Home. by Rosarie(f): 9:01pm On Nov 04, 2014 |
acenazt:we gø tru some tingz so our kids dnt go tru same.ur story is vry touchng |
Re: What It Feels Like To Come From A Broken Home. by kandiikane(m): 9:10pm On Nov 04, 2014 |
I didn't come from a a broken home. Had my mum, grandma, grandad, uncles, aunties, cousins around. ![]() 2 Likes |
Re: What It Feels Like To Come From A Broken Home. by acenazt: 9:26pm On Nov 04, 2014 |
Rosarie:thanks. I hope and pray I become a better Father to my children. |
Re: What It Feels Like To Come From A Broken Home. by duperola(f): 10:01pm On Nov 04, 2014 |
i am 4rm one&it wasnt funny growing up. 1 Like |
Re: What It Feels Like To Come From A Broken Home. by onegig(m): 7:13am On Nov 05, 2014 |
Ayoolajumoke:Hate is a strong word to use and a very bad thing to harbor. It not only consumes you but has psych effects on your decisions subconsciously. You are doing yourself more harm than good. Just learn to move on and learn to live with his absence. Tough but life throws us various tribulations and this is your own cross to carry. What he did was despicable but just learn to forget it. You should thank God your mum stood by you and not throw you out like he did.Just forge on and excel in life. There is more to life than hating on someone who for all intent may be dead or even doesn't remember he has offsprings somewhere. And mind you there's nothing like a "broken home", just a family with different architecture, peculiarities and description. Stop attaching negativity to yourself. Nothing wrong being brought up by a single parent. 6 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: What It Feels Like To Come From A Broken Home. by Ayoolajumoke(f): 12:29pm On Nov 05, 2014 |
onegig: Thanks sir. |
Re: What It Feels Like To Come From A Broken Home. by Nobody: 8:51pm On Nov 22, 2014 |
It would have been better if my parent are separated than what they are now. Living together under one shed without talking to eachother for years is more better than being divorced. I wanted to tell the story behind this ,but tears is rolling than my cheeks...... Sobs! 7 Likes |
Re: What It Feels Like To Come From A Broken Home. by queensley55(f): 11:28pm On Nov 22, 2014 |
Cursing your dad will only make you a bitter person,i grew up with my grandma in a home of 5 adults and 11 kids more like an orphanage,my mom watched me from a distances thou my dad never looked back,faught my insecurities,and now i admire the person i have become,am proud that it took only me to get were i am today.. 4 Likes |
Re: What It Feels Like To Come From A Broken Home. by baby124: 12:07am On Nov 23, 2014 |
Sorry OP. That's too bad. I don't know how it feels. But don't dwell too much on it. Make sure you are wiser in your choice of husband so that it will not be a generational issue. Be very careful who you marry or open your legs for. Anyone that can turn their backs and disappear on their family or even kids is not mentally sound at all. 4 Likes |
Re: What It Feels Like To Come From A Broken Home. by Ayoolajumoke(f): 7:28am On Nov 23, 2014 |
Neyoor: Eeyah. |
Re: What It Feels Like To Come From A Broken Home. by eleko1: 9:39am On Feb 03, 2015 |
Sheathe ur sword,forgive and forget.He probably leave due to economic(Financial issue or whatever is it.We all read bout the story of 3 teens abandoned by their parent in a boarding sch few months ago)dnt mind ignorance advised that flow from kids,Ur dad isn't a sperm donor.Believe me that he's thinking bout u all,most especially Ur mum.I pray Ur mum live long to reap the fruit of her labour and may the Wisdom that established Joseph/Daniel establish U and ur brotha,U'll find favor in d sight of God and man.If Ur dad appear today,embrace him,cook for him(accept him back like a prodigal son)and shame the devil.NEVA GIVE UP Ayoolajumoke: 2 Likes |
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