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It Turns Me On Seeing My Wife Hurt, Sad Or In Pain - Family (3) - Nairaland

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Man Apologizes To His Wife After Seeing Her Like This At Home (Photo) / "I Am Tired Of Seeing My Husband's Hard Joystick Every Morning!" - Nigerian Lady / ‘love-making With My Husband No Longer Turns Me On’ (2) (3) (4)

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Re: It Turns Me On Seeing My Wife Hurt, Sad Or In Pain by menix(m): 10:16pm On Dec 09, 2015
Uwa Mmebi Husband..
Re: It Turns Me On Seeing My Wife Hurt, Sad Or In Pain by profmallory(m): 10:18pm On Dec 09, 2015
Here is my Opinion on this issue. A lot of people are turned on by pain, either pain to themselves or pain inflicted on others. In fact i know for sure that my wife gets turned on when ever I am angry, why?, i probably will never know. I still cant comprehend it till today. I would like to think its the feeling of been powerful enough to make another human weep s in your case that turns you on, and perhaps in my wife the feeling of been dominated by another human. One thing is that we are turned on sexually individually by weird things. Now in your case I think its wrong deriving any form of joy hurting someone. Your wife might like the whole play out and she might not, I suggest you ask if she hs noticed the trend and what her opinion is. If you want to change I suggest you turn to Christ, cause I believe at some point your desire to hurt your wife might turn into physical violence.

I believe when you at at peace within you will make your wife happier and inturn your marriage would be a home of laughter and not sadness and crying.
Re: It Turns Me On Seeing My Wife Hurt, Sad Or In Pain by Confessng: 10:19pm On Dec 09, 2015
Never underestimate the power of confession Tell her exactly what it is , or let her read this post, let her understand that you are tired of it and want to change , then both of u agree on a trigger word , so when u are hurting her she just says it to remind you that you are hurting her , the trigger word can be as simple as page saying PAIN or as unique as she saying baby peaches and cream , just something to help you stop that behavior at that point , she obviously loves you else she would have told her folks how badly you are treating her , it's time to man up and face the fact that real men treat women right
Am happy for you though cos the first step really is knowing there is a problem and seeking help
Kudos to you for that
Daily12:
This might sound obscene to some people, as i do not intend to hurt anyone feelings but i seriously need help. I dont know if i can continue this or not. But i would be short and straight, and i hope you guys can help me. Please

-
I married my wife 2 years ago and we were very young. Our parents kind of forced us into it. My dad said i must marry her so that he can cement his friendship and contract with her father. Her own Mum told her she must marry me so that the family business would continue and the name stands since its a joint venture. So, technically, our parents used us both for business! I was only 23 she was just 19 approaching 20. She was 20 the Sunday after our wedding. That is not really the problem here, the problem is I enjoy seeing my wife in pain! It turns me on when she cries or she is sad. It makes me feel closer to her.

And as a result of this, Sometimes i deliberately do things to hurt her feelings. I scold her at every opportunity! I pick a fault in her every action. I complain about everything. I even condemn whatever she does just so she can feel bad and possibly cry. That is my intention. It has become like a drug and i'm an addict. I cannot stay without it.

In fact, sex is not what i want even when we have sex i am aggressive and mean so she can feel excessive pain. It suppose to bother me but it doesn't, it makes me feel happy.

Long story short, I think i am not normal or maybe its a fetish i don;t know but whatever this is, my wife is at the receiving end of it and she is receiving the bad side. Please mature persons, i need your advice. Divorce is impossible, our parents would disown us. so that is why she is still around and i am not surprised she did not file for divorce or report my wicked actions. She is just "Swallowing It" because her father might just disown her or cut her off from his expenses. And same applies to me, i am starting to love her and i dont want to keep on hurting her and i was thinking of ending the marriage so she finds someone better but my mum said she must not hear it and i know my dad wont find it funny. So its impossible to separate from each other and its somehow impossible for the pain she is going through to stop because I am the pain, and i want to fix this.

Thank You all.

1 Like

Re: It Turns Me On Seeing My Wife Hurt, Sad Or In Pain by dapsonlou(m): 10:20pm On Dec 09, 2015
The Problem you are having is Maturity, you have someone who you can mistreat with no repercussions, I suspect one of your Parent treated you that way growing up. Change Now so you and you Wife can grow Old together, young love is the best. If not by the time your wife is 25 all the things she lack from you she shall surely get it from another man. No one is a fool forever, she will only take it if her family is poor and yourself is rich, either way she will find comfort in another man. Every woman wants to be loved, be the one who give it to your Wife not Bolaji from Secondary school

1 Like

Re: It Turns Me On Seeing My Wife Hurt, Sad Or In Pain by austino3050(m): 10:20pm On Dec 09, 2015
this one na zee world
Re: It Turns Me On Seeing My Wife Hurt, Sad Or In Pain by onyowo(f): 10:20pm On Dec 09, 2015
KimBerlyie:
This reminds me of fifty shades of Grey embarassed embarassed
. U r sooooo on point..u spoke my mind
Re: It Turns Me On Seeing My Wife Hurt, Sad Or In Pain by obaao(m): 10:22pm On Dec 09, 2015
Just sent a mail to you. Can we talk privately? You can inbox me on showerland@gmail.com
Re: It Turns Me On Seeing My Wife Hurt, Sad Or In Pain by sniper77(m): 10:22pm On Dec 09, 2015
I will advise you see a shrink.
Re: It Turns Me On Seeing My Wife Hurt, Sad Or In Pain by refiner(f): 10:22pm On Dec 09, 2015
StiffDick:
Refiner. Yours is different. You are more like a Sadist. Do you also like and enjoy aggressive sex with excessive pain?. x.x.x™

sadist?nt dat I Dnt lik seeing people happy oo,,,,I Lov makin people more happier nd I deriv joy in giving Buh d problm dere is dat I lov doin finx dat I knw Vewi well dat Wil annoy or hurt someone Vewi close to me like my boo.anytime I see him angry nd insulting me I Lov smilin
Re: It Turns Me On Seeing My Wife Hurt, Sad Or In Pain by Nobody: 10:23pm On Dec 09, 2015
I think I can kinda relate and I very much empathise with you, your tone is quite sincere and it'll be a shame to lose such a nice girl because you're unable to find another outlet for your aggression. First, even though this may sound counter intuitive, you need to let her know that you're not ignorant of the pain you're causing her; let her know it's because you derive some pleasure from it which you now realize is perverse in nature. Your girl loves you that's probably why she's still with you or else regardless of what her dad says she'ld have been off a long while ago, the result of your owning up to her might be that she stops validating your perversion or she actually starts buying into it, either way you come out a better person.
You should also look for an outlet for pent up aggression, I will advise you to spend less time in the house, go and do something outside, burn out most of that youthful energy before returning to the loving embrace of your wife...I know you're young and as a man myself, I can't imagine being tied down to a girl at 25, but it is what it is, you have a head start over most of us, make the best use of it.
All the best dude, don't lose that chick, you'll appreciate her even more as you grow older.

2 Likes

Re: It Turns Me On Seeing My Wife Hurt, Sad Or In Pain by Nobody: 10:23pm On Dec 09, 2015
Estharfabian:
shockedNigga, You is A beast...undecided

Aggressive sex is one thing...Some people dig it..undecided

Buh Tryna Make her hurt and miserable Is just inhumane and Insane!lipsrsealed I don't know how Ladies could withstand pain..

I'd probably kill, or poison You if I were in her shoes...undecided

Anyways...I'd suggest prophet Tb Joshua...After like 10strokes, stripping U naked, his saliva and an Olive oil...You'd be normal eventually...cheesycheesy
A cold heineken 4 yhu...
Re: It Turns Me On Seeing My Wife Hurt, Sad Or In Pain by repogirl(f): 10:26pm On Dec 09, 2015
The OP needs serious HEP angry

The first step is knowing you need help sha and a willingness to change which you already have... See a shrink, that's the best advice I can give you.

1 Like

Re: It Turns Me On Seeing My Wife Hurt, Sad Or In Pain by BetaSexLife: 10:26pm On Dec 09, 2015
Westernization has killed us!

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Re: It Turns Me On Seeing My Wife Hurt, Sad Or In Pain by Pidggin(f): 10:26pm On Dec 09, 2015
Why not seek for solution from a psychiatric doctor? You have mental health issues that can be addressed if you do the needful.

1 Like

Re: It Turns Me On Seeing My Wife Hurt, Sad Or In Pain by Nobody: 10:27pm On Dec 09, 2015
bros no vex ooo. you they crazy like seriously, my father have such opportunity and pass to me not experience this bad good country problem na woman go b problem...... no way look for school and learn how to treat a WOMAN
Re: It Turns Me On Seeing My Wife Hurt, Sad Or In Pain by Nobody: 10:27pm On Dec 09, 2015
Refiner? Do you love it and smile when he Diicks you aggressively too with much pain like the Op apart from the anger and insult? x.x.x™
Re: It Turns Me On Seeing My Wife Hurt, Sad Or In Pain by FISAYOADEX(m): 10:29pm On Dec 09, 2015
Op, the condition you are suffering from is called SADOMASOCHISM in psychiatry. It is a type of paraphilia. And like you rightly wrote, you need urgent help. Kindly find your way to a mental health clinic to consult a psychiatrist and a psychologist. In case you need more clarification, you can let me know. God bless you.
Re: It Turns Me On Seeing My Wife Hurt, Sad Or In Pain by Banter1(m): 10:29pm On Dec 09, 2015
Daily12:
This might sound obscene to some people, as i do not intend to hurt anyone feelings but i seriously need help. I dont know if i can continue this or not. But i would be short and straight, and i hope you guys can help me. Please

-
I married my wife 2 years ago and we were very young. Our parents kind of forced us into it. My dad said i must marry her so that he can cement his friendship and contract with her father. Her own Mum told her she must marry me so that the family business would continue and the name stands since its a joint venture. So, technically, our parents used us both for business! I was only 23 she was just 19 approaching 20. She was 20 the Sunday after our wedding. That is not really the problem here, the problem is I enjoy seeing my wife in pain! It turns me on when she cries or she is sad. It makes me feel closer to her.

And as a result of this, Sometimes i deliberately do things to hurt her feelings. I scold her at every opportunity! I pick a fault in her every action. I complain about everything. I even condemn whatever she does just so she can feel bad and possibly cry. That is my intention. It has become like a drug and i'm an addict. I cannot stay without it.

In fact, sex is not what i want even when we have sex i am aggressive and mean so she can feel excessive pain. It suppose to bother me but it doesn't, it makes me feel happy.

Long story short, I think i am not normal or maybe its a fetish i don;t know but whatever this is, my wife is at the receiving end of it and she is receiving the bad side. Please mature persons, i need your advice. Divorce is impossible, our parents would disown us. so that is why she is still around and i am not surprised she did not file for divorce or report my wicked actions. She is just "Swallowing It" because her father might just disown her or cut her off from his expenses. And same applies to me, i am starting to love her and i dont want to keep on hurting her and i was thinking of ending the marriage so she finds someone better but my mum said she must not hear it and i know my dad wont find it funny. So its impossible to separate from each other and its somehow impossible for the pain she is going through to stop because I am the pain, and i want to fix this.

Thank You all.
story
Re: It Turns Me On Seeing My Wife Hurt, Sad Or In Pain by INDUSTRIALFAN(m): 10:29pm On Dec 09, 2015
KashyBaby:
Ur a sadist, OP, the pain of others are ur pleasure... undecided
Isn't it Obvious he knows that already? He needs advice and not confirmation of what he just admitted....
Re: It Turns Me On Seeing My Wife Hurt, Sad Or In Pain by refiner(f): 10:31pm On Dec 09, 2015
StiffDick:
Refiner? Do you love it and smile when he Diicks you aggressively too with much pain like the Op apart from the anger and insult? x.x.x™

sorry luv,,,,never had sex before.so I wuldnt knw
Re: It Turns Me On Seeing My Wife Hurt, Sad Or In Pain by Nobody: 10:31pm On Dec 09, 2015
jhalaljnr:
A cold heineken 4 yhu...
undecidedChampagne please!wink
Re: It Turns Me On Seeing My Wife Hurt, Sad Or In Pain by cynhamscakes(f): 10:32pm On Dec 09, 2015
Wow! Wow!!

Tongue tied.



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Re: It Turns Me On Seeing My Wife Hurt, Sad Or In Pain by Eddyspicy(m): 10:32pm On Dec 09, 2015
Your actions are SADISTIC and you are a SADIST! It's hard for me to comment on issues but this your story really touches me. I can't even stand it when my g.f feels pains or cry not 2 talk of my WIFE! Try and visit ur village herbalist for celestial deliverance with correct koboko beating. Thank me next year.
Re: It Turns Me On Seeing My Wife Hurt, Sad Or In Pain by harristo(m): 10:34pm On Dec 09, 2015
Daily12:


Actually it's my wife and that is what gives me concern not other women. And I did not feel this way prior to the marriage. I have worked with women I did not feel this way.

I don't get excited seeing other women hurt but I'm happy and pleased seeing my wife hurt.

If what you said here is true, then I suspect that woman must be an ogbanje. She must be the one responsible for all this.
Re: It Turns Me On Seeing My Wife Hurt, Sad Or In Pain by AlPeter: 10:35pm On Dec 09, 2015
Strahovski:
Hmmm i have read the whole stuff and OP, i think i can reproduce what you are going through. Normally i would make a trash comment and port to the next thread but from what you wrote, i can see some sincerity and willingness to solve the issue. So i would help you smiley

First, Your wife! She is young(She is 22 now) , her emotions are heightened up and this is a big deal for her considering where she is coming from(Her Family). I presume she does everything you want, when you misbehave she would still be the one to apologize and i can also sense that she is in love with you. Trust me, she is a girl, her father is not a problem! Do you think she does not have another bank account where the boys are sending her money? (Another set of "toasters"wink, so if she wants out, she would get out! I have dealt with cases like this during my days. She loves you man, and you are taking advantage of it because it turns you on.. So follow these steps and see how it turns out:

- Communicate with her: Confess your crimes and tell her how it turns you on. Confess you do it intentionally. And observe her response(Dont be surprised she knows already) If you dont fix it, in the future, she might be using the hurt/pain to get things from you because "It brings you closer to her"
- Consult a marriage Counselor or Therapist: You need some counseling! You need to know that she is your wife and not an object of pleasure!
- Start feeling her pain: Make her pain your pain! When you start feeling her pain, you wont be the pain anymore.
- Find another way to please yourself: Yup, it can be a video game(You are a young dude), poker, or a friday night out with your wife every week.
- Make her the boss when it comes to sex: You do it her way! Not your way! At least for now *wink*
- Find out what turns her on: Its time she is the one turning on not you! You have had enough. Because all that is turning on in her is her pain.
- Be closer: Watch movies together, go on weekend time out, attend church programs together.. make her feel loved.

So Op, when you have tried it for about 3 - 6 months you would re-wire out of the idea that you should hurt her first.

Hope i helped smiley

You can update me on the situation and i would be happy to help. Send me a mail, i will give you a call!
hmmm

Daily12, dude this is the best answer you can get...... Take everything in this advise it will help. And I think you should let her really know you've fallen in love with her.....
Re: It Turns Me On Seeing My Wife Hurt, Sad Or In Pain by Nobody: 10:36pm On Dec 09, 2015
you said you know you need help, yet u come to Nairaland.

sorry there are no shrinks on here.

will be better if you check yourself into a facility and get treatment otherwise, one day you will realise that you have killed your wife.

see a psychologist or a psychiatrist and get help.
Re: It Turns Me On Seeing My Wife Hurt, Sad Or In Pain by Nobody: 10:36pm On Dec 09, 2015
Refiner. Good for you if you have never had sex. Bet you will like it aggressive with excessive pains based on your preference when you start Swindling Diicks. Good luck with your virginity. Anything else you can message me. x.x.x™
Re: It Turns Me On Seeing My Wife Hurt, Sad Or In Pain by zinachidi(m): 10:36pm On Dec 09, 2015
Estharfabian:
shockedNigga, You is A beast...undecided

Aggressive sex is one thing...Some people dig it..undecided

Buh Tryna Make her hurt and miserable Is just inhumane and Insane!lipsrsealed I don't know how Ladies could withstand pain..

I'd probably kill, or poison You if I were in her shoes...undecided

Anyways...I'd suggest prophet Tb Joshua...After like 10strokes, stripping U naked, his saliva and an Olive oil...You'd be normal eventually...cheesycheesy
smh, so is this the advice u have to offer him?
Re: It Turns Me On Seeing My Wife Hurt, Sad Or In Pain by ccollins(m): 10:37pm On Dec 09, 2015
KashyBaby:
Ur a sadist, OP, the pain of others are ur pleasure... undecided
sweetheart, no calls, no emails,, you just snub since makes me feel tired.. my phone can't use whatapp
Re: It Turns Me On Seeing My Wife Hurt, Sad Or In Pain by Nobody: 10:39pm On Dec 09, 2015
zinachidi:
smh, so is this the advice u have to offer him?
His condition has no Cure...undecided


He needs the devil himself...undecided
Re: It Turns Me On Seeing My Wife Hurt, Sad Or In Pain by Nobody: 10:41pm On Dec 09, 2015
If this were to be US or UK, I recommend u see a shrink but here in Nigeria, go visit a deliverance pastor because u are sick/ possessed.

1 Like

Re: It Turns Me On Seeing My Wife Hurt, Sad Or In Pain by zinachidi(m): 10:42pm On Dec 09, 2015
Estharfabian:
He needs to devil himself...undecided
i don't grab wah u meant by this.

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