davidsgal:
My fiance is 13yrs older dn me

ILIDEFI:


That's my worry.
I dated an older girl for 3½ years before we fell apart. She was a very great, godly, beautiful, intelligent, virtuous girl and so on. We fell apart cos I wasn't ready for marriage when we initially agreed. Beside that, I wasn't so physically attracted to her, mainly cos of her height.
I've been with numerous girls before. I have quite a lot of them at work, yet I haven't been attracted to any.
This girl charmed me the very first time I saw her, and she nice.
This is why I'm worried.

tommychow:
Guy! When you were 13 and in secondary school she was just a little baby. Think about that.

And in what world will her father listen to you about marrying his daughter? Have you seen a double barrel shotgun up close and pointed at your face? You'll know the "love" isn't real.

Suigeneris93:



Marriage is a serious matter but just know dat if u wanna go ahead with her you'll need patience and a tough skin. Gudluck!

ronald4lif:
At 17 you guys have an age variance of 13years which isn't obnoxious and unsuitable but her age which stands as a barricade.

I'm unsure what Nigeria legitimate consenting relationship age is but I'm guessing it's 18, and in a years time she would mark her 18th birthday.

I'd advice you to keep her on a friendship level and don't wholly back down then when reaches 18 you can strike up a romance with her.

In my opinion, the age gap isn't an issue to contend with as it's appropriate but her juvenescence. By age 33 she'd be 20 and perfectly okay to match you at that time for marriage. I don't see why her parents will be unwilling to give their consent and/or repudiate your marriage proposal.

The only issue here is that you might become to attach to her before she clocks 18 and might be tempted to get intimate but having affirmed to be a virgin at your age I think you might scale through the temptation. Don't bother about the myopic and pharisaical submission of previous annotators, they have no short comings and too judgmental.

Diddyydiva:
Age is nothing but numbers.

She is 17




Just make sure you are compatible in other ways.

ILIDEFI:


Thanks bro. I appreciate your comment.
I'm not really looking at her age now, but the fact that she'd be 20 by the time I'm 33. How many men will want to release their daughters at that age, especially to a man who is as old as that?

ILIDEFI:
I noticed this girl in church on Christmas day service. She happens to be an usher in the church. The girl charmed me immediately I set my eyes on her, such that I couldn't take my mind off her again.

Frankly, I haven't been anything close to a womaniser all my life, and I can't remember if I've ever met a girl for the first time and asked for her number, but for this girl, it was different. I was passionate to get close to her and be her friend. In fact, I was hoping for an opportunity to have a future with her.
I was able to get her phone number that day, and finally started communicating with her.

This girl is so lovely, attractive (not like she's d most attractive girl I've ever seen), intelligent, warm etc.
As I started interacting with her, I discovered to my utter dismay that she's just 17 years old, while I'm almost 30 years. I have a plan of getting married in 3 years time, and frankly, I was looking at a possibility of getting married to her, if all things fit in.
Also, I'm a professional while my new friend is just about to get into the university.

I am a very responsible young man. By God's grace, I've been able to keep my body, and still wish to continue so till I get married. I look quite young facially, and I'm smallish (just a meagre 5' 7" in height). She on the other hand looks a little bit mature (looks 23 or thereabout) and she's about 5' 6", so she doesn't look much younger than me.

I admire this girl a whole lot and I'm almost in love with her already, but I feel crushed when I consider her age. Even in that 3 yrs time, she'll just be 20, while I'll be approaching 33.

Please house, I need counsel.
Do I stand a chance with her in any way?
Does it even seem right for me to attempt initiating a relationship with her?
Will an average family (especially well-to-do ones) accept such for their daughter in this day and age?
How do I approach this situation, as my heart can't just let her go?

Please no insults, okay. I'm only seeking for advice.

Thanks in anticipation of your wonderful support and encouragements.

NB: Lalasticlala, I beg you, don't move this to the front page, no matter what. Thanks.

ILIDEFI:


Thanks for your understanding and encouragement. I'm quite sure my head will become clear in the next few days, and I will make the right choice.
I may likely not go ahead, though.

AhmadMind:
I will give you ROCK solid advice.

Marriage is not Dating (trying to look kool to friends etc) ...Its about the distant future.

Focus on what it will look like in 10 years = You will be 40, she will be 27. And after 3 kids, she will add 7 years Therefore she will look 34 when you are 40...Not bad eh??

Suppose you marry your age mate.... She will look 47 when you look 40.

So., bottom line is that this babe needs to reach at least 19 before marriage tins.

People will shout but in our days You enter UNI at 16 and graduate at 20. AND MOST good GIRLS WERE ENGAGED OR PREGGY AT FINAL YEAR!!

tommychow:
Guy! When you were 13 and in secondary school she was just a little baby. Think about that.

And in what world will her father listen to you about marrying his daughter? Have you seen a double barrel shotgun up close and pointed at your face? You'll know the "love" isn't real.

ILIDEFI:


It's a choice bro, and I'm proud about it. I'm doing it to the glory of God, and I'm not ashamed of myself.

ILIDEFI:


Thanks bro. I appreciate your comment.
I'm not really looking at her age now, but the fact that she'd be 20 by the time I'm 33. How many men will want to release their daughters at that age, especially to a man who is as old as that?

ILIDEFI:
I noticed this girl in church on Christmas day service. She happens to be an usher in the church. The girl charmed me immediately I set my eyes on her, such that I couldn't take my mind off her again.

Frankly, I haven't been anything close to a womaniser all my life, and I can't remember if I've ever met a girl for the first time and asked for her number, but for this girl, it was different. I was passionate to get close to her and be her friend. In fact, I was hoping for an opportunity to have a future with her.
I was able to get her phone number that day, and finally started communicating with her.

This girl is so lovely, attractive (not like she's d most attractive girl I've ever seen), intelligent, warm etc.
As I started interacting with her, I discovered to my utter dismay that she's just 17 years old, while I'm almost 30 years. I have a plan of getting married in 3 years time, and frankly, I was looking at a possibility of getting married to her, if all things fit in.
Also, I'm a professional while my new friend is just about to get into the university.

I am a very responsible young man. By God's grace, I've been able to keep my body, and still wish to continue so till I get married. I look quite young facially, and I'm smallish (just a meagre 5' 7" in height). She on the other hand looks a little bit mature (looks 23 or thereabout) and she's about 5' 6", so she doesn't look much younger than me.

I admire this girl a whole lot and I'm almost in love with her already, but I feel crushed when I consider her age. Even in that 3 yrs time, she'll just be 20, while I'll be approaching 33.

Please house, I need counsel.
Do I stand a chance with her in any way?
Does it even seem right for me to attempt initiating a relationship with her?
Will an average family (especially well-to-do ones) accept such for their daughter in this day and age?
How do I approach this situation, as my heart can't just let her go?

Please no insults, okay. I'm only seeking for advice.

Thanks in anticipation of your wonderful support and encouragements.

NB: Lalasticlala, I beg you, don't move this to the front page, no matter what. Thanks.

davidsgal:
My fiance is 13yrs older dn me

ILIDEFI:


Thanks bro. I appreciate your comment.
I'm not really looking at her age now, but the fact that she'd be 20 by the time I'm 33. How many men will want to release their daughters at that age, especially to a man who is as old as that?

simplex2:


Is it casted in stone that you MUST marry at 33? Be her friend for the mean time. Help her grow spiritually, educationally and be her support. Offer her advises and let her know you like her. In 4 yrs time, she will be about to round-up her studies, if you guys are still close and strongly in love by then, you can marry her if she agrees.

What if, just what if you pass on her right now and she even goes ahead to marry someobe else before her 20th year?