My Wife Feels Little Or No Urge For Intimacy... Please Advice - Family (7) - Nairaland
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He Did Not Enjoy Intimacy With Me, And Concluded I Am Cheating / I Can’t Bear My Husband’s Strong Sexual Urge: Wife / My Wife Has Little Or No Urge For Intimacy. Possible Causes & Solutions. (2) (3) (4)
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| Re: My Wife Feels Little Or No Urge For Intimacy... Please Advice by uvalued(m): 4:03am On Apr 01, 2016 |
deen11: |
| Re: My Wife Feels Little Or No Urge For Intimacy... Please Advice by Nobody: 4:56am On Apr 01, 2016 |
pet4ril: Everything MAN OF GOD. So u want him to go and expose his wife to a fellow mortal. This is a common sense issue dear. He has more to do. 3 Likes |
| Re: My Wife Feels Little Or No Urge For Intimacy... Please Advice by Kazrem(m): 5:13am On Apr 01, 2016 |
kola1930:Bro you cannot judge yourself by yourself as far as romance is concern. How romantic? That answer can only be answered by her. Now if the issue is that she does not "enjoy" making love, (with emphasis on the word enjoy) then you may be the problem. Yes . It may be that you don't satisfy her sexually. Maybe she doesn't reach organism most time. And you know from experience, women don't like it when they don't cum most of the times. That is why as a man you must do everything reasonably possible to satisfy your wife sexually. These are just maybes. So the solution to that is simple: ensure you satisfy her sexually. How to do that is a lecture for another day. Secondly, if she does not like the act (base on your studying her), that is natural. Some women don't too much like it, just as not all men like it that way. I have a sister who doesn't like it that way too. What can you do to this? This one is very tasking. You have to be very very very romantic. I don't want to here, I am romantic. Here you have to be extraordinarily romantic. Can I share my experience with you? No. Not here. The bottom line is this: you have to do everything sexually. Practical: kiss her from behind. Call her during the day and talk dirty. Feed her. Have bath with her. Carry to her to bed room. Help her to loose her hair. In fact help her to do some house chores. Carry the baby while she's busy. Just be romantic. Do everything romantically. Now, this is noteworthy: don't expect her to change in two days. Not even two weeks. Your consistency will determine how long or short it will take her to change. I hope this helps. God bless your marriage. Agarawu23 hope you dey learn. 3 Likes |
| Re: My Wife Feels Little Or No Urge For Intimacy... Please Advice by Pidggin(f): 5:24am On Apr 01, 2016 |
xtervaganza: |
| Re: My Wife Feels Little Or No Urge For Intimacy... Please Advice by Praktikals(m): 5:35am On Apr 01, 2016 |
[quote author=kola1930 post=44195379][/quote] Women are always like that, especially when they know you don't have side chicks. Just give her the impression that you are seeing someone else (it doesn't have to be true), and watch the table turn. One whole month without s*x? Bros you try o |
| Re: My Wife Feels Little Or No Urge For Intimacy... Please Advice by Nobody: 5:37am On Apr 01, 2016 |
She is a witch.....flog her with plantain leave, she go confess |
| Re: My Wife Feels Little Or No Urge For Intimacy... Please Advice by drnoel: 5:45am On Apr 01, 2016 |
Pidggin: Now that is not just uncalled for but unfair. The woman in question don born for am so the case of physical attraction should not come. @Op, that problem cuts across many marriages. The solution is like someone else said communications. Talk to ur partner before you do what you would regret. 1 Like |
| Re: My Wife Feels Little Or No Urge For Intimacy... Please Advice by mactoni91(m): 5:46am On Apr 01, 2016 |
same reason i dnt buy the sex after marriage idea... Many women / gurlz got dis Coitophobia and the only way they seem to hide it is by religiously saying '' sex after marriage ''. Truth be told, its better u understand ya patner's sexual orientation before u take that oath(for better for worse) because marriage aint a jump in and jump out thing neither is it game where we implore '' cheating '' as a defense mechanism. 1 Like |
| Re: My Wife Feels Little Or No Urge For Intimacy... Please Advice by femcent2: 5:49am On Apr 01, 2016 |
she might have genital mutilation, those kind of ladies have little or no urge for sex but don't be disturb just try to find out her weak point..... |
| Re: My Wife Feels Little Or No Urge For Intimacy... Please Advice by Burger01(m): 5:54am On Apr 01, 2016 |
Ahmed0336:Ntoor!  |
| Re: My Wife Feels Little Or No Urge For Intimacy... Please Advice by debola23(f): 5:56am On Apr 01, 2016 |
Something is definitely wrong somewhere, some women take a longer time to feel the need for sex/intimacy after delivering? Was it a very stressful delivery for her? Being the first baby, it usually is. Don't assume she is doing it to spite you, she may be dreading the day you will confront her. You can't keep on this way, else your thoughts to cheat maycome into fruition. Communication, you can solve almost every problem if you just talk. Don't be upset, ask her in a loving manner if she isn't still ready because you miss her gan. Ask how you can help her to be ready. And no matter how hurtful her responses come out, don't get upset, just be patient. 1 Like |
| Re: My Wife Feels Little Or No Urge For Intimacy... Please Advice by Rawblings(m): 5:57am On Apr 01, 2016 |
take a chill pill and talk to her...... if you don't communicate with her, she'll just be staring at you like bambiala  |
| Re: My Wife Feels Little Or No Urge For Intimacy... Please Advice by OgenemaroKessy(m): 5:57am On Apr 01, 2016 |
kola1930: Ops. Please try to ignore all these silly question and suggestions and base your action on reasonable ones, I will tell you that since you knew that she is not a sex freak from d days of courtship till marriage, I don't see why your being insecure now. Secondly You know better than anyone else what her likes and dislikes are, just try to establish that body language, the same way you used to do when your courting. Am 3 years in marriage with my wife and I love the fact that she is not a sex freak when we are courting till now but I know how to turn her on when I want. She is your Wife and You know the secret, no need to cheat on her, Thank God for not giving you a sex freak. Regards. 1 Like
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| Re: My Wife Feels Little Or No Urge For Intimacy... Please Advice by mandax: 5:59am On Apr 01, 2016 |
[quote author=kola1930 post=44195379][/quote] Ditch her if she doesn't change completely. I am afraid you may have to continue with the same problem in future, even if she makes some momentary change for now. Many women enter into marriage because of harsh economic situation they are in, once married, they become insensitive of their obligations to the marriage. Some even see other man or even men while married, get sexual satisfaction from outside, come home and no urge for intercourse with the husband; but remain in the marriage for financial stability. 1 Like |
| Re: My Wife Feels Little Or No Urge For Intimacy... Please Advice by Cholison(m): 6:00am On Apr 01, 2016 |
NOTED |
| Re: My Wife Feels Little Or No Urge For Intimacy... Please Advice by here: 6:01am On Apr 01, 2016 |
The challenges of present generation of new weds are unique sometimes I wonder because it has its way of boiling to the next generation. I was wondering reading the replies "why the blame game" just because you were unfortunate you believe every case is same? Why say "She is busy taking care of His Child" or even assume it has anything to do with his personal appearance. There are many possibilities and blames or negative mindset has never helped anyone.All we can do is suggest possibilities but not this because I think by these attacks on genders I see no better definition for "selfish and bitter" OP I understand there are humans who do not know how to address and issue and most times it comes out like there have been piles of offences try to avoid that and communicate with her.Get a help but where possible let her get considering ur pocket thats if you dnt have one.Like as many suggested undertake vacations or sleep outs but at safe locations once a while you can go with the baby as all you all need is change of environment.If you can consider changing appartment and let her decide what location and if you cannot afford it now atleast you have agreed and work towards it.You both need a hobby,support each to undertake something like games or group anything to help one have and independent time aside work.It might or mightnt be the fault of the other and in most cases its not just an underlying problem to a bigger problem and the real issue mightnt even be addressed in the long run bcz I know the problem is after everything you feel you have done,the only thing you feel you love to have its denied you with no explanation,I understand but hang in there.Try avoid the discussion seeming your complaining,not many women however you think are strong inside recover from Labour but I admire a colleague who once said she really feels like giving birth again,the was the bread winner then! So you see relax dnt push urself and get frustrated if efforts doesnt change anything but keep the communication open while avoiding stress after work.I have seen alot and sometimes imagine why they keep being married if each are expected to prove to be worth it.Its marriage not a contest. Sometimes you dnt assume he or she should know thats why you ask "Honey can you help me with this or can you take this route to pick this up for me but if its not ok I can manage". Wonder really. Hang in there bro,evaluate whats needed like I said to make you both comfortable and run it with here get her input and let each take responsibility. Wish you luck |
| Re: My Wife Feels Little Or No Urge For Intimacy... Please Advice by Inmylife(m): 6:09am On Apr 01, 2016 |
Its mind blowing that some people will see situations that are serious and instead of averting d danger, they wil allow it occur to d detriment of a fellow human.Bro I quite undastand u.Mine is same wt u.Same yr in marriage same 5 months old baby same attitude from my wife. Thought of cheating bt quickly dropped it cos I love her.See what I resolved to do... Some pipl commented correctly anyway.(1)NEVA think of divorce or cheating(2)For most women,d use of silence and allowing dat gap wil neva move dem one bit,same wt my wife U need anoda method like(3)get more emotional,u can jokingly declare a 3 min hug wit her jst allow her hold u in hug 4 three mins and see if she won't melt.I also wnt u to knw dt she need sex bt maybe hiding her feelings same way u r doin.She is urs whenever u need her go for her bt make her undastand. dnt apply force.(4)There is dis funny thin I always do whenever I discover her negligence in sex... I buy shaving stick nd use it to shave her armpits,nd ofcourse dat thin I want to enter.But u see,u only need patience,perfect communication bw u,nd to always devise a new soft method over her stubbornness.U need be an expert over her weakness she loves u a lot I bet u.Dnt allow ur marriage to crumble as for me I can't wait for upto a month.hope it works.But if it still persists I tell myself I shall engage d services of a relationship counsellor...Dnt give gap during d counselling lest d pastor or d counsellor takes advantage of ur plight nd snatches ur woman...bt I knw good number of dem are sincere. Tnx man. 4 Likes |
| Re: My Wife Feels Little Or No Urge For Intimacy... Please Advice by akanbiaa(m): 6:12am On Apr 01, 2016 |
Likely reasons 1. Your baby is still several months old and being nursed 2. Hormonal changes affects some ladies during nursing of child. 3. You might be unromantic, you just want sex and you release thats all, no pre-intimacy 4. You have not maintained the deep communication system that develops between husbands and wife 5. You need to talk to her and ask her what the problem is but start by saying she should forgive you for what ever you might have done wrong to her. |
| Re: My Wife Feels Little Or No Urge For Intimacy... Please Advice by clemekes(m): 6:12am On Apr 01, 2016 |
Man is just too early to be thinking of cheating on her.try to find out why she is behaving DAT way and correct it. |
| Re: My Wife Feels Little Or No Urge For Intimacy... Please Advice by unmask: 6:14am On Apr 01, 2016 |
deen11: All these for se,x he should be getting free......dont give what belongs to the side chick to the wife 1 Like |
| Re: My Wife Feels Little Or No Urge For Intimacy... Please Advice by clemekes(m): 6:15am On Apr 01, 2016 |
Man is just too early to be thinking of cheating on her.try to find out why she is behaving DAT way and correct it. 1 Like
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| Re: My Wife Feels Little Or No Urge For Intimacy... Please Advice by klimson: 6:19am On Apr 01, 2016 |
halfricanadian:Maybe na Obasanjo or Oshiomole kind of person. |
| Re: My Wife Feels Little Or No Urge For Intimacy... Please Advice by Mboeky: 6:19am On Apr 01, 2016 |
Don't pressure her. Tell her she is beautiful occasionally. Ask her if she OK! The problem might not be to do with you, sometimes as men we think that everything is our fault, that our ego is dented. If you love your wife then you should just try and understand her. You talk like it's your god given right to have sex whenever you want, just because you married her. |
| Re: My Wife Feels Little Or No Urge For Intimacy... Please Advice by IsaacBuchi(m): 6:21am On Apr 01, 2016 |
Onegai: Damn! You are romance itself.... Seriously you need to consider becoming a family romance coach... |
| Re: My Wife Feels Little Or No Urge For Intimacy... Please Advice by Ogojohn(m): 6:24am On Apr 01, 2016 |
You may not like what i will have to say. If you dated that woman before marriage. I must tell you that you were blinded to see the tale tale signs. Some women are married to the marine kingdom. So no matter what you do. Sex is not a primary importance to them as it is to a man and this can even last for her whole life time. I must tell you. You are in for a long ride and will be stuck with this if you do not unravel the cause. You just unboxed a sealed and wrapped pack and the contents are not what you bought. She may need spiritual cleansing as her problem may not be all that physical and simple. But to start with. Why not sit her down and tell her how you feel about her lack of feelings emotionally, sexually and otherwise. That will be a good start. Do this before you put yourself in a bigger mess because of this. Best of luck. |
| Re: My Wife Feels Little Or No Urge For Intimacy... Please Advice by fabre4: 6:26am On Apr 01, 2016 |
pet4ril: Look I don't like commenting on this kind of threads but yet again I couldn't resist the urge . why should she see a man of God when their are marriage counsellors later on when the man of God takes advantage of the situation to satisfy himself because it is obvious both are sex starved you guys will still be the one go complain 1 Like |
| Re: My Wife Feels Little Or No Urge For Intimacy... Please Advice by Sheggy13(m): 6:27am On Apr 01, 2016 |
assana:Even the Bible says explicitly that wives do not deny your husband intimacy except for when you're both fasting. The husband that has gone out probably since 5am in the face of heavy Lagos traffic, chasing the daily bread both of you will enjoy and comes home late isn't stressed up too abi? How can someone keep turning down the sexual advances of a man you're married to for up to a month without any cogent reason. Later they'll end up in church praying needless prayers about God helping to take control of the husband when they've succeeded in pushing him outside,for those that cannot bear it again. That's why it's important for people in relationships to discuss their sex life and how often they feel like getting it before ending up marriage. Any lady I date, it's usually one of the first things I let her realize so if she can't cope, she can find her way early enough to avoid stories like this. Don't allow the advice of stupid girls who can't keep a marriage for more than a year cos of their warped orientation deceive you into having problems with your husband. They're quite much on this thread. You know them from their comments and the cheap likes they get from their fellow senseless companions. Use your head sis and save your marriage. A word is enough. 3 Likes |
| Re: My Wife Feels Little Or No Urge For Intimacy... Please Advice by isinno: 6:29am On Apr 01, 2016 |
kola1930:We should all know how women behave, Before marriage they will give you front and back, Most of them you can raise any of there legs up and you can enter any corner, but after the first child it will be once every two weeks, after the second child it will be monthly, Then after the third child you start begging for Sex because they believe they are already in the house, That nothing dey Happen » May be I made a very big mistake of getting a 3 bedroom apartment, because she has her own room my children has one and I also have one. 2 Likes |
| Re: My Wife Feels Little Or No Urge For Intimacy... Please Advice by lakamua: 6:31am On Apr 01, 2016 |
Op. Let me guess. You are frm western nigeria. U guys dnt knw hw to discipline a woman. Dnt be surprised dat ur wife may even already be cheating on u. Mr man, u have to be strict. Dnt ever beg such a woman, just treat her d way she treats u. Please ursef and 4get abt her cause am sure she is also pleasing hersef by nt caring hw u feel 1 Like |
| Re: My Wife Feels Little Or No Urge For Intimacy... Please Advice by ashjay001(m): 6:32am On Apr 01, 2016 |
kola1930: Op, pele. That's been a constant among all my married frnds, u begin to wonder if na plan work. Pre-marriage, u get so much sex, u get scared u might not be able to keep up, then after d 1st or 2nd kid u start wondering how u missed out on those ladies u hear are always all over their hubbies! Thinking abt it now, I realise we all arrived at d same solution over d long run; sidechick, to varying degrees of success. Some are upfront, some are sneaky, yet d result always remain d same. U will get CAUGHT, and d hassles no be for here! Do anything u like and be prepared for d consequences, it is as sure as d day u were born. D funny thing is, those sidechicks can't seem to get enough of u, and madam is on sabbatical. Try all d proferred solutions 1st, so it won't be as if u didn't try. Hope one or two will make it happen for u. 3 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: My Wife Feels Little Or No Urge For Intimacy... Please Advice by TeetoEsq(m): 6:33am On Apr 01, 2016 |
deen11:...if the above doesn't yield results then she might; a. Be suffering from v'gina dryness b. Be having a spiritual problem. Possibly a spirit husband is enjoying her in some realm c. Be detesting your dirty appearance and unwholesome sexual lifestyles d. Be masturbating in your absence or keeping a young dude servicing her somewhere |
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She Is Too Shy To Initiate Lovemaking With Her Husband / Am About To End My 15yrs Marriage / Friends Defend Nigerian Lady Who ‘divorced’ Her Husband At Airport In London
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