Help! She Is Just 23years Old But Acts Like An Old Woman - Romance - Nairaland
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| Help! She Is Just 23years Old But Acts Like An Old Woman by accountbalance: 1:52pm On Aug 19, 2016 |
Please I need working and realistic advice on how to help this young lady. She happens to be a relative that confides in me for advises in her general life. She is in ND II at a federal polytechnic. A very respectful full and big hearted girl. Just yesterday night, she put a call through to me, crying that her boyfriend has not been treating her well. So I decided to talk to the guy directly (we all know the guy at home). The guy told me how much he loved my cousin but he complained that she doesn't behave like a young lady, he said she behaves like a woman, and that he has tried in so many ways to change her but he couldn't. To be honest, I couldn't argue with this guy because I know very much that he is saying the truth. My cousin does not act like all these trendy girls at all, yes she is beautiful but she dresses like an old woman, talks as if she has been born since 1960. I think because she grew up with our grandma might be the cause but it's getting very weird. She is also very religious unlike the rest of us. She would tie wrapper, even her walking position would suggest a very very old person. The poor boy mentioned many other weird intimate things that I can't mention here. I just told him not to worry, that we'll do something about it. This is a little bigger than me because it seems she doesn't see anything wrong with her, she prides in the fact that she is matured for her age but now it's ruining her love life. What can we do to help her? 18 Likes 7 Shares |
| Re: Help! She Is Just 23years Old But Acts Like An Old Woman by accountbalance: 1:59pm On Aug 19, 2016 |
Please now, Kindly read the post before commenting. Lalasticlala please we need more advice on fp o. |
| Re: Help! She Is Just 23years Old But Acts Like An Old Woman by DRISKLEF(m): 2:01pm On Aug 19, 2016 |
accountbalance:Seriously.  2 Likes 2 Shares |
| Re: Help! She Is Just 23years Old But Acts Like An Old Woman by Nobody: 2:04pm On Aug 19, 2016 |
you need to talk to her about her looks..... but thing is if you try to change a person the next thing that might happen is.... you might not be able to recognise the person... 115 Likes 12 Shares |
| Re: Help! She Is Just 23years Old But Acts Like An Old Woman by sorextee(m): 2:06pm On Aug 19, 2016 |
This Is just funny. You need to advice her dearly.. Cos it might affect her in her 30s. Cos she will no longer look attractive to her guy, that's if him never lose interest by then. 8 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: Help! She Is Just 23years Old But Acts Like An Old Woman by Nobody: 2:08pm On Aug 19, 2016 |
Bro, this is a psychological problem as it has to do with altering personality. Unless you find a way to make her see her unique difference as an abnormality or problem, there is absolutely nothing you can do. It's all up to her. 15 Likes 3 Shares |
| Re: Help! She Is Just 23years Old But Acts Like An Old Woman by accountbalance: 2:10pm On Aug 19, 2016 |
baddestchic: Thanks for your advise dear. We have spoken to her many times. She is just so comfortable in her primitive ways. Initially, it looks to me like all this mummy and daddy plays we act when we were kids. You know the way a little girl takes the role of a mother, seems she didn't get over it, it has mastered her. 6 Likes |
| Re: Help! She Is Just 23years Old But Acts Like An Old Woman by Samted69: 2:11pm On Aug 19, 2016 |
lmao. benjamin button's disease maybe?? 6 Likes |
| Re: Help! She Is Just 23years Old But Acts Like An Old Woman by Nobody: 2:12pm On Aug 19, 2016 |
Hian but when he saw her, wasn't she acting like an old woman, but he still went ahead to date her?? 76 Likes |
| Re: Help! She Is Just 23years Old But Acts Like An Old Woman by Nobody: 2:18pm On Aug 19, 2016 |
accountbalance: best advice is to leave and accept her the way she is....cause if she forces herself to change she might not continue to be that loveable girl that you have been talking about. give her time, she will eventually meet someone that she loves and when she sees other babes competing with her she would try to upgrade.... 29 Likes |
| Re: Help! She Is Just 23years Old But Acts Like An Old Woman by accountbalance: 2:18pm On Aug 19, 2016 |
Fabulocity: Dear, this is not case of somebody trying to dump another. You say it as if the guy is looking for excuses. It's not possible to know everything about a person when you meet them. Only when you get close. If you meet her, you'll know she's a lovely person. 20 Likes 2 Shares |
| Re: Help! She Is Just 23years Old But Acts Like An Old Woman by LuvU2: 2:21pm On Aug 19, 2016 |
I am sorry dis sounds funny to me  7 Likes |
| Re: Help! She Is Just 23years Old But Acts Like An Old Woman by newsphase(m): 2:21pm On Aug 19, 2016 |
Okay... if he tries to change her... She may turn into one of those prostitute looking girls around... My question is what does the guy really want... Does he want to change her to fit his preferences or does he want to change her and make her better.... Its two different things and the latter is much more easier... for the both of them 29 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: Help! She Is Just 23years Old But Acts Like An Old Woman by accountbalance: 2:21pm On Aug 19, 2016 |
sorextee: You just confirmed my fears. In fact, you seem to understand the picture am painting. Because if the guy is complaining right now, things will get worse later even if they get married. I'll still talk to her tho. 3 Likes |
| Re: Help! She Is Just 23years Old But Acts Like An Old Woman by Nobody: 2:22pm On Aug 19, 2016 |
Don't worry her ok she is very ok.by the time husband no show she go change..tell her that.. |
| Re: Help! She Is Just 23years Old But Acts Like An Old Woman by accountbalance: 2:25pm On Aug 19, 2016 |
baddestchic: I think I will harmer on that competition aspect to her. If she doesn't want to loose the guy, she better upgrade. Or do you think I can tell the guy to try and put her on her toes by getting close to other trendy babes, I think that will be dangerous. 1 Like |
| Re: Help! She Is Just 23years Old But Acts Like An Old Woman by Nobody: 2:28pm On Aug 19, 2016 |
accountbalance: some guys have a way of over doing things o, so i think it will be better for you to talk to her about it,since shes close to you half of the deal is solved 1 Like 1 Share |
| Re: Help! She Is Just 23years Old But Acts Like An Old Woman by accountbalance: 2:28pm On Aug 19, 2016 |
newsphase: I believe the guy is trying to make her better. I also suspect that he might be getting tempted by other babes, although he didn't say this exactly but I think he wants her to be up to standard. 4 Likes |
| Re: Help! She Is Just 23years Old But Acts Like An Old Woman by accountbalance: 2:33pm On Aug 19, 2016 |
baddestchic: You are right. Do you think it will make a difference if a lady talks to her? |
| Re: Help! She Is Just 23years Old But Acts Like An Old Woman by Nobody: 2:35pm On Aug 19, 2016 |
accountbalance: dont force her sha... we are about the same age. i just started working on myself recently, last month i learnt how to makeup still working on it though... but me i did my own for myself sha and my mum no try for me... we would both be outside and she would be looking finer... warisdat??.... she just needs a little bit of motivation from the right person 5 Likes |
| Re: Help! She Is Just 23years Old But Acts Like An Old Woman by Nobody: 2:39pm On Aug 19, 2016 |
accountbalance: she needs someone shes close to,to do the talking not necessarily a woman.....try talking to her first....if she thinks the way you made it appear on your post then family is important to her, take advantage of it. |
| Re: Help! She Is Just 23years Old But Acts Like An Old Woman by Nobody: 2:42pm On Aug 19, 2016 |
| Are you straight kiddin' me? You And the Boyfriend are the 1's with the problem!!!! ..... He knew how she was conservative when he was 1st dating her but he expected her to change ? My cousin does not act like all these trendy girls at all, yes she is beautiful but she dresses like an old woman, talks as if she has been born since 1960Why is it a problem she doesn't dress "trendy"? I'm gonna assume you mean in short and tight clothing ....... If she isn't comfortable/doesn't care for "trendy" dress WHO are you or the Boyfriend to diagnose it a problem? ..... And it should not be valid reason for neglect,her dress style She is also very religious UNLIKE THE REST OF USNow THIS is where the TRUE Problem lays. Because she's not the norm in your personal circle you think there is something wrong with her. You also stated above she wasn't what ya'll thought a young woman should be like. ...... You nor Boyfriend gets to decide that. THERE US NOTHING WRONG WITH YER COUSIN. The problem lays in yours and Boyfriend minds. 48 Likes 4 Shares |
| Re: Help! She Is Just 23years Old But Acts Like An Old Woman by newsphase(m): 2:47pm On Aug 19, 2016 |
accountbalance: That is what you think and not what you believe. guys are easily tempted by tight jeans and loose blouse and maybe thats just what he wants her to become... he wants her to walk sexy, to talk sexy, to shake her ass when she walks, he wants her to wear makeup, to start talking with pretty voice, to start cat walking... or am I wrong? when you say you want to make someone better, there is a different feel to it... because you wouldn't force someone to be better than they are, since they will accept when you suggest it.. 7 Likes |
| Re: Help! She Is Just 23years Old But Acts Like An Old Woman by Mustay(m): 3:04pm On Aug 19, 2016 |
How old are the subjects in question  Women tend to behave 'older' than their peers. The OP seems to have drawn a conclusion and taken sides. From "crying that her boyfriend has not been treating her well" to "behaving like a woman", is he behaving like a man himself You've called the lady primitive etc and seem not to realise that the qualities she possesses are outstanding enough to differentiate her from these "trendy girls". It appears that you think she's got a problem but the lessons she's got from her grandma is helping her in shaping the kind of woman she is today. In fact, those who grew up with the elders have definitely swallowed coconut water - I value such experience. Do not make a 'good girl gone bad' out of this lady. Na jeje the guy see her wey e go meet her, if he wants to meet more trendy girls, let him click on the trending topics. From all you wrote, it's the guy who seems not matured enough to handle her. She's not at disadvantage like you would want us to believe neither is she losing anything as you think. 30 years old is not a race. PS: The details of the "weird intimate things" can alter this analysis.  47 Likes 2 Shares |
| Re: Help! She Is Just 23years Old But Acts Like An Old Woman by accountbalance: 3:06pm On Aug 19, 2016 |
You have spoken very well but I don't agree with you totally. ButteredBiscuit: If you read the post well, you'll notice the lady in question is my blood. I am only looking out for her. If the boy mentioned something else, I would have ignored it but the point he mentioned was something we have been trying to correct for a while.
Of course the guy knew her ahead but that has gone beyond conservation. Who wouldn't want their woman to look good? Even pastor's wife look good. Why is it a problem she doesn't Dres "trendy", Being trendy does not necessarily translate to exposing your body. BTW, I would gladly want my wife to wear bumpshots for me inside the house so I don't blame the guy if he wants my cousin to wear something sexy. I wouldn't also want my wife to dress to work like an old grandma all because of conservation. 6 Likes |
| Re: Help! She Is Just 23years Old But Acts Like An Old Woman by Pouyan: 3:06pm On Aug 19, 2016 |
DRISKLEF:He mentioned she does Bleep like an oldie. However, op, you should get her to rehab or make her live amongst younger girls. I do hope she doesn't use napkins instead of sanitary pads? That'll be just nasty. |
| Re: Help! She Is Just 23years Old But Acts Like An Old Woman by sorextee(m): 3:08pm On Aug 19, 2016 |
Truth be told, my elder sister was like that too. She's the first, ND we didn't grow up with our mum. Which made her to start acting more maturely from age 13. She didn't have all those teenage nd youthful fun. She was behaving like an old woman. When her eyes would open, it was too late. So we don't want that to happen to ur cousin. accountbalance: |
| Re: Help! She Is Just 23years Old But Acts Like An Old Woman by accountbalance: 3:15pm On Aug 19, 2016 |
Pouyan: I wouldn't want to say yes but it seems you are beginning to get my point. |
| Re: Help! She Is Just 23years Old But Acts Like An Old Woman by Mustay(m): 3:16pm On Aug 19, 2016 |
accountbalance: This is not the quality of a responsible man. There are conflicting terms here - "trying to make her better" vs might be getting tempted by other babes" vs "up to standard". Do you really want the best for this relative of yours Better temptation carry an unprincipled man away than 7 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: Help! She Is Just 23years Old But Acts Like An Old Woman by Nobody: 3:19pm On Aug 19, 2016 |
Am I allowed to laugh please |
| Re: Help! She Is Just 23years Old But Acts Like An Old Woman by Pouyan: 3:20pm On Aug 19, 2016 |
accountbalance:You wouldn't want to say yes? That means she does?! Homer, please get your sister some help from younger females. Have her raped by lesbians, she should be indoctrinated into the lesbianism world, if you're so worried about her mind's overgrowth.. Pull a more powerful hex. |
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