Mophasa:
Please guys I need your advice and suggestions please.
There is this girl I have been dating for over a year now, I love her so much and intend to marry her soon. I think she loves me too.

She's currently doing her Nysc in cross river while I am in the north. We haven't seen each other since last November though we always chatting and talking on phone like everyday. We have been so cool over the past few weeks and we arranged for her to come see me this week, Thursday to be precise. I even sent her 10k for transportation.

Now after we talked last night and she agreed to come on Thursday, she called me early this morning around 6am only to tell me there was a problem, when I asked her what it was, she told me despite the fact she loves me so much and wants to be with me, she's breaking up with me because she doesn't want to be having sex anymore, that she's not okay with her spiritual life.

I was devastated and all my efforts to try talk sense into her has been in futility! Now the problem am having is that this girl happens to be the only woman in my life, for over a year we, ve been together I have not cheated on her despite the distance. I love her so much and I have always wanted to end up with her. I always did everything possible to make her happy and I, ve never hurt her before.

Please guys I don't want to lose her, what do I do.


From a heartbroken Nairalander

LordAdam16:




Funny you.

But madam reason am na.

He is in the North, they've not been together since November (3 months), they've been having good communication for several weeks now, at no point during this time did she say anything about sex and her spiritual life.

Now, yesterday, oga mi said, you know what, why not you come over. Send #10k join. She agree. No talk or thought about sex and her spiritual life.

Morning reach, oga dey whistle dey one arrange room, kon hear from madam say she no want relationship again because of sex.

Why she no jovially call tell the guy say no sex if she come? Then them go start dey reason weda d relationship fit proceed without sex. In one night, the holy spirit ministered to her to not have sex again for spiritual reasons and break up with the guy?

Please, flip the tables. If na guy do girl this thing na, wetin u go talk?

-Lord

freecocoa:
Maybe it's a phase cos I remember a time I felt same way about sex, but mine wasn't about spirituality or whatever, just had a conversation with myself and decided I wanted to try celibacy, especially since sex wasn't doing any thing for my life nor relationship then.

Who knows, your girl might just be telling the truth or she doesn't love you anymore or she's seeing someone else. It's left for you to figure out which it is.

SorftWerk:
i didn't finish ur story bro before I read her yeye mind and knew what she indirectly meant. Thing is, someone else is fucking the shit outta her pussy over there, and I think she loves the person MORE than she loves you, hence she feels sleeping with u means cheating on the other guy that currently owns her pkomo, what u should do is this, just act like you are happy with the decision she's made, act happily and tell her you are cool with it if she's leaving, wish her good luck and DONT say you love her... You will see how women act when confused


It hurts me to tell u this bro.. You are a mugu maga side Nigga now, take heart!

Sorry Mophasa.... but this guy is 100% right.

Worst thing you can do is start pleading to her / reasoning with her. It would make you look like a weakling; a beta male.

Show indifference to the breakup and try to distract yourself with lady-friends where you live.

One day, she might/ might not realize her folly. But i am almost sure she's banging another guy and she prefers him to you, SORRY.

All she's doing now is finding filmsy excuses. THE MOST EFFECTIVE WEAPON you can use now is INDIFFERENCE, mark my words.

Delete her numbers and images from around you so as not think too much about her

Anytime you remember her, listen to Shyne Barrow's " Get out".... Maybe sing it for her .

Na so one yeye gal sing Craig David's "Walking away" for me after catching me with her best friend

Mophasa:


I truly love her and wouldn't mind staying with her without sex, I even told her but she wouldn't have none of it.
Claiming there is no Way we could be together without having sex.
Am actually ready to do anything just to be with her,

pocohantas:
Look at how pained guys are that a sister doesn't want to keep on donating her toto
I said it that most Nigerian guys are just looking for babes to keep on fucking. Relationship to them is a f<cking spree...Withdraw sex and watch the animalistic traits in them come to play. This are the same people that ask what a lady brings to the table aside sex.
One even talk of losing husband. Has he married all the ones he f<cked??

Ladies should learn from threads like this.
For an average Nigerian guy, sex equals love.

SorftWerk:
and I'm sure she told the new guy she's not in a relationship... I cry for op

joey150:


Seriously?! You are asking what 10k is...??

I find that comment very disgusting.

Help somebody around you with 10k today.


Fake lives you all put up... If we check well you aint given anybody up to that amount ever.

freecocoa:
Maybe it's a phase cos I remember a time I felt same way about sex, but mine wasn't about spirituality or whatever, just had a conversation with myself and decided I wanted to try celibacy, especially since sex wasn't doing any thing for my life nor relationship then.

Who knows, your girl might just be telling the truth or she doesn't love you anymore or she's seeing someone else. It's left for you to figure out which it is.

pocohantas:
Look at how pained guys are that a sister doesn't want to keep on donating her toto
I said it that most Nigerian guys are just looking for babes to keep on fucking. Relationship to them is a f<cking spree...Withdraw sex and watch the animalistic traits in them come to play. This are the same people that ask what a lady brings to the table aside sex.
One even talk of losing husband. Has he married all the ones he f<cked??

Ladies should learn from threads like this.
For an average Nigerian guy, sex equals love.

pocohantas:

Did you see any bible quotation in that post?
That's common sense...she no wan f<ck OP again, simple!

kennygee:
She just got born again and has decided she's not about that fornicating life anymore.

She can't force you to be in the same spiritual level as she is and it won't be fair for her to remain in the relationship denying you sex if you are not ready to come on board the Christian relationship.

Move on with your life to another female who is about the fornicating life.

It sure pays to know Jesus.

kimbra:
This story doesn't add up. If at all she was worried about her spiritual life she won't have gone on to agree on meeting with you on Tuesday. She would have brought up the subject while the both of you were discussing and making arrangements.

Mophasa:


Am sure you are one of those people that don't read before commenting.
Am 30 and I didn't come here to be insulted and called names. I only needed a genuine advice and suggestions.
From the post I didn't state where she said she got born again and my concern is not because of the sex but because I intended to marry her and I have sacrificed so much for the relationship.
I know you are a kid so you won't understand.
I wonder why people like you will just come into someone's thread and instead of making meaningful contributions will start forming judges and saints.

If you quote me or try to judge or insult me again you will never find any solutions to any of your life's troubles!

greatnaija01:
If sex is what is so important to you in a relationship then YOU NEED JESUS because you are cheating on HIM.

Since when did sex become LOVE...ehn... biko tell me... who sex epp? rather it weakens you. it is good only when it is right and thats MARRIAGE...

this generation has its values warped... It seems you do not know that LIFE IS SPIRITUAL... will sex protect you from witches n wizards??

this is sad but bros you are not even thanking God that she is becoming a wife material by taking her spiritual life seriously... she will meet more responsible guys WHO CAN WAIT till marriage... then your eyes will clear!!!

bros you gatta know that LIFE IS MORE THAN SEX. if she is the only woman for you then MARRY.... else you are not responsible enough for her.

anyone who thinks dating or relationship is an excuse for sex is not ok at all. LOVE is sacrifice not feelings.... 10 year later the feelings or horniness will die... but its the sacrifices you have both been thru that will keep you.

THE ONLY WAY TO KEEP SUCH A GIRL IS TO MARRY HER.... and i advice you that if you are not ready to change your values and upgrade spiritually do not bother.

falconey:

same if men withdraw money and caring. we all must inject something to keep both parties happy don't you think?

if you can't play by that don't say yes to our proposals. objectively what do you think men need women for? I thought this is a common knowledge.

kennygee:
She just got born again and has decided she's not about that fornicating life anymore.

She can't force you to be in the same spiritual level as she is and it won't be fair for her to remain in the relationship denying you sex if you are not ready to come on board the Christian relationship.

Move on with your life to another female who is about the fornicating life.

It sure pays to know Jesus.

Mophasa:


I truly love her and wouldn't mind staying with her without sex, I even told her but she wouldn't have none of it.
Claiming there is no Way we could be together without having sex.
Am actually ready to do anything just to be with her,

pocohantas:

If a guy did this, I would be glad we have one Nigerian guy that is interested in not widening a girl's toto.
I will be glad he didn't keep on fucking the girl while dating another by the side...that's assuming there is someone else.

I would appreciate the fact that the relationship can nurture other aspects different from sex.

I will advise her to make peace with that guy, look beyond sex...that's a man with high self-control.

The problem is, where is this kind of guy in Nigeria?? ??

99foxxy:
The mere fact that she has gone to serve, answered it all. My elder brother's babe who is serving, gave him the shock of his life, so youth service is another sure way of babes, I mean the brainless ones ways of quitting their relationships. On a closer note, sex ain't love, what if she never loved you and later got some one she loves and she's playing with your brain over sex shiit stuff.

2sa2:
She has another boyfriend, this is just her way of breaking up with you. Girls never value faithful guys.

Laburos:
I sorry for una Boy friends Girl go nack every guy she dates and even the cucumber she bought then when they meet one unfortunate dude they start Celibacy or abnegation or what have they, and the expect you to stay? spreed the Legs or Walk

kennygee:
She just got born again and has decided she's not about that fornicating life anymore.

She can't force you to be in the same spiritual level as she is and it won't be fair for her to remain in the relationship denying you sex if you are not ready to come on board the Christian relationship.

Move on with your life to another female who is about the fornicating life.

It sure pays to know Jesus.

LordAdam16:


Them dey na. Them no plenty sha, but them dey.

Knew about one, not exactly like this.

Guy met this girl when she was in yr one. Stayed with her all tru till her finals (4 years). Celibate all tru.

Furnished her room to the teeth. E clear say d guy one marry d gal.

Final yr, d gal tell am say she no sure again. I mad for d gal. The guy pack all he things wen he buy tk console himself.

So, if that kyn guy kon decide to "widen girls ****", you go start dey blame am?

Moreover, d point is that she did not give the guy a chance to decide if he too will do fine in a no-sex relationship. And also the gal know say e no get magic wen she 1 do to dey collect from the guy steady if she no break up. Even runz gals no dey tidy every guy for their contact list na. D gal don tire for the guy mata. The sex na excuse.

-Lord