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17.2% Of My Monthly Salary Goes To My Wife & Yet... - Family - Nairaland

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17.2% Of My Monthly Salary Goes To My Wife & Yet... by Nobody: 7:00pm On Mar 19, 2017
Dear reasonable people on Nairaland, please I need your advise

My wife whom I love so much and also loves me too is entitled to 17.2% of my monthly income, my salary is 175kpm and she take 17.2% of this amount, yet she feels very uncomfortable with it

I pay the bills, buy food stuff every month and take care of our little baby girl

My baby girl does not take any local food, she takes only fresogold, tea and pap, the cost of fresogold is very high and she can consume 4tins in a month

My wife isn't not working yet she is still schooling and I pay all her fees,

I've never complaint of my duty as the head of the family yet she still feels unsatisfied with the 17.2% I give to her

Her primary duty in the house is to take care of our baby and prepare my dinner every week days and both break fast and dinner during the weekend

Recently I told her to take our baby to the hospital for treatment, our total bill was 11,500 naira but my wife suprisinly told me that the hospital bill is 22,700 naira which I immediately wired to her account

So I called the hospital to make inquiries about the exorbitant bill then I got to know that my wife inflated the hospital bill to 22,700 naira

I confronted her and she spoke to me very rudly I was not happy about this, I kept quite and didn't say anything about it again

I am thinking I should penalize her for her rude behaviour and the dishonesty she has melted on me

Will it be advisable not to pay her her monthly salary for two months ?

Will this correct her brain to default and what would possibly be the implication of doing this ?

She has not apologised and she has not seen anything wrong so far in what she has done

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Re: 17.2% Of My Monthly Salary Goes To My Wife & Yet... by Cutehector(m): 7:01pm On Mar 19, 2017
It will correct her senses! Pls go ahead..u have my support!

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Re: 17.2% Of My Monthly Salary Goes To My Wife & Yet... by Nobody: 7:08pm On Mar 19, 2017
This is what happens when you marry longer throat.

Someone who's never satisfied and wants to live above their means - (and in this case lack of)


that is your cross, carry it.


kikikikikikikiki grin if you stop paying her the 17.2% for two months, be prepared to starve o. cos when you drop money for food, you won't see food. the cash in your wallet will grow wings, your ATM card sef fit miss. grin

so carry your cross!

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Re: 17.2% Of My Monthly Salary Goes To My Wife & Yet... by agabaI23(m): 7:13pm On Mar 19, 2017
Sit her down and find out why she is doing that.

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Re: 17.2% Of My Monthly Salary Goes To My Wife & Yet... by HARDDON: 7:21pm On Mar 19, 2017
Ehmmmm op, how did u arrive @ that 17.2%?

Any mathematical formular applied? cheesy

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Re: 17.2% Of My Monthly Salary Goes To My Wife & Yet... by Dyt(f): 7:26pm On Mar 19, 2017
I add money too
And I think one out of 3 women do that or most have done it


The only thing I condemn is her being rude to you
But then how did you approach her

There's always a man involved when a woman goes crazy

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Re: 17.2% Of My Monthly Salary Goes To My Wife & Yet... by Vhicthorade(m): 7:28pm On Mar 19, 2017
What's kpm?







Modified

Oh! Okay.. 175K per month. Ah.

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Re: 17.2% Of My Monthly Salary Goes To My Wife & Yet... by Pieromania: 7:46pm On Mar 19, 2017
Bro sori to tel u this,bt u are on a long thing.I see that marriage breaking anytime soon......why on earth wil a man pay his wife salary,what is the rationale behind such absurdity is what i can't fathom out?A STUDENT for that matter,u pay all bills,pay her fees and yet pay her salary.Very soon she wil start cheating on u,if not already started it.
Sori bro,ur case is different

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Re: 17.2% Of My Monthly Salary Goes To My Wife & Yet... by Nobody: 7:57pm On Mar 19, 2017
Pieromania:
Bro sori to tel u this,bt u are on a long thing.I see that marriage breaking anytime soon......why on earth wil a man pay his wife salary,what is the rationale behind such absurdity is what i can't fathom out?A STUDENT for that matter,u pay all bills,pay her fees and yet pay her salary.Very soon she wil start cheating on u,if not already started it.
Sori bro,ur case is different

She isn't cheating on me and my marriage will not break IJN

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Re: 17.2% Of My Monthly Salary Goes To My Wife & Yet... by Nobody: 7:59pm On Mar 19, 2017
Dyt:
I add money too
And I think one out of 3 women do that or most have done it


The only thing I condemn is her being rude to you
But then how did you approach her

There's always a man involved when a woman goes crazy

But the money she added is just too much 22,700 - 11,500 = 11,200 naira

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Re: 17.2% Of My Monthly Salary Goes To My Wife & Yet... by Pieromania: 8:02pm On Mar 19, 2017
skypeme:


She isn't cheating on me and my marriage would break IJN
I am nt wishing u breakup bro,just telling u that failure to resolve this her insatiable thirst wil definitely lead to the marriage crashing,i knw what i am saying.U aren't earning that much and yet ur wife cannot be satisfied with the little u have,mehn,u need serious prayerv and counselling.u may think am spewing threats or trash,bt i am a man speaking with experience.

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Re: 17.2% Of My Monthly Salary Goes To My Wife & Yet... by Nobody: 8:04pm On Mar 19, 2017
HARDDON:
Ehmmmm op, how did u arrive @ that 17.2%?

Any mathematical formular applied? cheesy

30,100 / 175,000 x 100% = 17.2%
I add 2.5% increment to my wifes salary every Dec

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Re: 17.2% Of My Monthly Salary Goes To My Wife & Yet... by Nobody: 8:05pm On Mar 19, 2017
Pieromania:
I am nt wishing u breakup bro,just telling u that failure to resolve this her insatiable thirst wil definitely lead to the marriage crashing,i knw what i am saying.U aren't earning that much and yet ur wife cannot be satisfied with the little u have,mehn,u need serious prayerv and counselling.u may think am spewing threats or trash,bt i am a man speaking with experience.

My marriage will not crash IJN, I repeat that you bro

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Re: 17.2% Of My Monthly Salary Goes To My Wife & Yet... by mexxmoney: 8:07pm On Mar 19, 2017
Mr man carry your cross and follow Christ. Everyone has got their own cross too you know

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Re: 17.2% Of My Monthly Salary Goes To My Wife & Yet... by NoToPile: 8:16pm On Mar 19, 2017
So sorry OP

So she gets around 30k as pocket money every month, and you pay all the bills buy everything needed and pay fees and school stuffs.That should be okay for her manage for personal effects I think, people earn 30k as salary nau.

That aside I see a lot of"I" "I" "I" in your statements its not all about you bro, You also mentioned the primary duties which you say is baby sitting, cooking your dinner during the week and both dinner and lunch during weekends, its quite a lot of work not as easy as it looks.

Not giving her her pocket money as a form of punishment translates to you not taking up your responsibility as a husband , you are meant to provide for her and take care of her and that should not change because of a misunderstanding especially since she has no source of income yet, where do u expect her to get money from if you seize her allawee.

Its better you communicate (not confront) to her let her know you were not happy with the extra she added on it, ask if she needed some extra stuffs at that time, ask why she did it was the 30k not enough for her that month?
Its not easy being in a position of being totally drpendednt and not having any money of your own, you need to see from her own view point too. She may have had extra need (you didn't mention she has inflated stuffs for you before ) and didn't want ti tell you about it since you already think she's not satisfied with the 17.2%





I don't know if its just me but I found the repetition of 17.2% in your narration quite amusing. OP no vex oo lool. How did you come to the conclusion that its 17.2% she's entitled too loool.

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Re: 17.2% Of My Monthly Salary Goes To My Wife & Yet... by NoToPile: 8:19pm On Mar 19, 2017
skypeme:


30,100 / 175,000 x 100% = 17.2%
I add 2.5% increment to my wifes salary every Dec


You are making it sound like its an employee employer stuff, December bonus abi issorait cheesy

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Re: 17.2% Of My Monthly Salary Goes To My Wife & Yet... by Nobody: 9:04pm On Mar 19, 2017
skypeme:


My marriage will not crash IJN, I repeat that you bro

In a nutshell. ...

From dating till marriage


Your union was founded on materialism and deception which must be sustained

.
the moment you renege from your initial agreement which is the basics and foundation of your marriage...hehehehe


as a student she has got flexible times to spend with highest bidders
.

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Re: 17.2% Of My Monthly Salary Goes To My Wife & Yet... by Atk1nson(m): 9:09pm On Mar 19, 2017
skypeme:


30,100 / 175,000 x 100% = 17.2%
I add 2.5% increment to my wifes salary every Dec

bro, seems more like employer-employee relationship. I'll rather have a situation where my wife and I jointly make plans, spend, render account and take responsibility. I don't support this stipend arrangement, she probably resents it.

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Re: 17.2% Of My Monthly Salary Goes To My Wife & Yet... by Nobody: 9:21pm On Mar 19, 2017
Why are some of the guys on this thread making a mountain out of a molehill?.

Most men whose wives are stay at home mothers get monthly stipends which is for their upkeep. Some women inflate prices of things to their husbands as a means to add more money to their wallets, for some men they find out and don't care cos they understand the rationale behind it. As for her rude attitude it's bad and is what should bother you most. Not her inflation of hospital bills. Would you let N11,200 cost you your marriage?.

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Re: 17.2% Of My Monthly Salary Goes To My Wife & Yet... by lilmax(m): 9:34pm On Mar 19, 2017
divorce is the only way right now, trust me

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Re: 17.2% Of My Monthly Salary Goes To My Wife & Yet... by emilyone(f): 9:43pm On Mar 19, 2017
lilmax:
divorce is the only way right now, trust me
Divorce kwa? On top wetin naa shocked

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Re: 17.2% Of My Monthly Salary Goes To My Wife & Yet... by lilmax(m): 9:47pm On Mar 19, 2017
emilyone:

Divorce kwa? On top wetin naa shocked
a liar and being disrespectful

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Re: 17.2% Of My Monthly Salary Goes To My Wife & Yet... by Nobody: 9:48pm On Mar 19, 2017
kimbra:
Why are some of the guys on this thread making a mountain out of a molehill?.

Most men whose wives are stay at home mothers get monthly stipends which is for their upkeep. Some women inflate prices of things to their husbands as a means to add more money to their wallets, for some men they find out and don't care cos they understand the rationale behind it. As for her rude attitude it's bad and is what should bother you most. Not her inflation of hospital bills. Would you let N11,200 cost you your marriage?.

Is it possible to love someone you don't trust


it's dishonest to forge or inflate prices in order to drain your hubby

If your husband can't trust you who would then trust you
.

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Re: 17.2% Of My Monthly Salary Goes To My Wife & Yet... by Nobody: 10:01pm On Mar 19, 2017
Cut her monthly salary from 17.2% to 5% for the rest of the year. And that is because of your baby, otherwise I would have suggested you cut it to 0% and chase her out with a broomstick around 2AM in the middle of the night.

Women of nowadays are brain-dead ingrates.

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Re: 17.2% Of My Monthly Salary Goes To My Wife & Yet... by Lush100(m): 10:36pm On Mar 19, 2017
Zoharariel:
Cut her monthly salary from 17.2% to 5% for the rest of the year. And that is because of your baby, otherwise I would have suggested you cut it to 0% and chase her out with a broomstick around 2AM in the middle of the night.

Women of nowadays are brain-dead ingrates.
.

it might work and might not.

but it might work though(OK I was joking all the while).

dear op cutting her "salary" from the way u constructed the woman at home will not yield ur desired result. u will just make her look at her option when she get pressed.
the fact she has s baby already swing things to her favour.

I must need to know the level of communication between the 2 of u.
what's the age difference and how old is she.
to be honest, from your description ur wife seem "not yet matured" or lacks maturity to put in another way.
she is young married has a baby and still in school., likely to be very beautiful too
could be pride? may be.
because u doing all this for a matured woman will earn her respect.

I just advice church counseling. (I recommend Baptist church.). very thorough counseling needed for her so that her understanding can change and that u have a good foundation.

best of luck Sir

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Re: 17.2% Of My Monthly Salary Goes To My Wife & Yet... by nnamdibig(m): 10:48pm On Mar 19, 2017
The first step in solving this problem is to know what she is doing with the money you are giving her(since you buy foods, pay every other bill).
Any wife that wants to help her hubby(who earns 175kpm) should know that you guys should save at least 100k from that money but the way she is going, she is not even interested in that.
And for person say every woman adds money, there are extent you can do such not double of the amount. It's very wrong just deduction from her next allowance simple. Things are expensive now.

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Re: 17.2% Of My Monthly Salary Goes To My Wife & Yet... by Ayinke93(f): 10:49pm On Mar 19, 2017
skypeme:


30,100 / 175,000 x 100% = 17.2%
I add 2.5% increment to my wifes salary every Dec
are you an accountant ni, with all this calculations... Na wa o

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Re: 17.2% Of My Monthly Salary Goes To My Wife & Yet... by Nobody: 11:20pm On Mar 19, 2017
Lots of women inflate home expenses, it's their way of raising cash which comes in handy at a later date (doesn't make it right). You really tried to give her 17.2%, that's even more than the allocation for God (10%) cheesy. Don't relent bro_ it's part of your duty as the head of the house(it's not a favour, same way she has her duties too).
I must say, almost 100% increase reeks of pure greed. Your wife is greedy and inconsiderate. It's worse that she sees nothing wrong in it, you reserve the right to be angry and I apologise on her behalf.

A woman would give such astronomical false increment;
1)If she thinks you earn more than you actually earn, so she deserves more than 17.2%.
2)She is greedy (i.e) lives above her means.
3)She has expenses she doesn't want you to know of (e.g, sending to her family).
4)The husband is stingy (you're not stingy @ 17.2%, considering that you handle every other expense).

Does she know what you earn? You guys probably didn't talk about the financial aspect of marriage during courtship. It's ideal your partner knows your financial ability...projections etc. That way you both work as a team. Finance/Financial compatibility is a very important aspect of marriage...

She is still in school. Probably young and yet to learn how to be frugal. She is a married student, people expect her level to change. How would she do that with 17.2%, when she hasn't learnt that life is beyond material things? It's also possible, her people have needs and she wants to help out, without begging you directly.

Your choice of words dey somehow @ "penalise and reset her brain to default" She is your wife bro_ not student. Don't penalise her, I believe there are ways to settle issues without penalising ones spouse with something that's your conjugal duty... but that's me. Call her and talk to her calmly/firmly, enquire what she uses/used the money for. Make her realise the importance of honesty and trust in marriage. Bless heavens you both love each other _makes change easier.

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Re: 17.2% Of My Monthly Salary Goes To My Wife & Yet... by Nobody: 11:48pm On Mar 19, 2017
sasko:


Is it possible to love someone you don't trust


it's dishonest to forge or inflate prices in order to drain your hubby

If your husband can't trust you who would then trust you
.

Don't bother women always play victimhood now it's the guys fault for getting angry let a guy inflate price for his wife and the women here would come for his head. Women play the victimhood card like hell. Nothing new

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Re: 17.2% Of My Monthly Salary Goes To My Wife & Yet... by MummyIMadeIt: 11:59pm On Mar 19, 2017
Am not married yet, but from all i have learnt from being from a good home is that communication is always the key to solving most situations in a marriage..

i hope your wife is the geniune type, though she may have her own reasons of inflating the amount by almost x2 the normal, which is inappropraite; what you need do is win her trust that she can rely on you without going the extra mile.

just saw this part where u said this:

I confronted her and she spoke to me very rudly I was not happy about this, I kept quite and didn't say anything about it again

Hmmn, she sounded so rudely that can mean two things i suppose either she feels she is entitled to more than the monthly alowee you give her or she has started keeping bad gangs as freinds, if paradventure it happens to be the former you realli need to sit her down and explain things to her, if possible you could establish her while going to skul, but if the latter my bro this one is strong oo, you need more to be investigative, calm and collective in your next line of action.

Sucess bro in ur marriage, but meanwhile you can help connecticut a broda oo to such oppurtunity. tha winknks

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Re: 17.2% Of My Monthly Salary Goes To My Wife & Yet... by Nobody: 12:01am On Mar 20, 2017
MummyIMadeIt:
Am not married yet, but from all i have learnt from being from a good home is that communication is always the key to solving most situations in a marriage..

i hope your wife is the geniune type, though she may have her own reasons of inflating the amount by almost x2 the normal, which is inappropraite; what you need do is win her trust that she can rely on you without going the extra mile.

Sucess bro in ur marriage, but meanwhile you can help connecticut a broda oo to such oppurtunity. tha winknks

Wife inflates price, and yet husband must win her trust, am confused do some women ever take responsibility for anything ?

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Re: 17.2% Of My Monthly Salary Goes To My Wife & Yet... by MummyIMadeIt: 12:12am On Mar 20, 2017
pcguru1:


Wife inflates price, and yet husband must win her trust, am confused do some women ever take responsibility for anything ?

Plz broda read out my post carefully and you should be able to deduce my point of corelation.. i said she myt have done dat out of her oda neccesities as a young mother still in skul or sumtin though am not justifying gher actions, all i said is that the MAN in question should talk his wife in trusting him more as to open up to him her needs instead of her doing things the wrong way........

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