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Are My Brothers Conspiring Together To Harass & Intimidate Me - Family - Nairaland

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Are My Brothers Conspiring Together To Harass & Intimidate Me by Nobody: 12:13pm On Mar 31, 2017
I come from a family of 7, 4 girls 3 boys of which am the last boy. My immediate brother is an alcoholic: always comes home from work drunk, always gets into unnecessary quarells with me and my dad whenever he is in a drunken state (he still stays with us), fiancee left him cos she noticed he was always drunk. He gets angry when my elder ones (all of whom are married and stay on their own) tries to reprimand him over the issue.

One morning my brother, the eldest son who works with an old generation bank, asked me to forward my international passport (form of identification) to him through my immediate brother that he wants to do a “transaction” with it (I have an account with his bank, which Nysc opened for me 4years ago during my service) and that I should ensure I don't bring personally. I refused. I refused because 5months earlier I accidentally eavesdropped on a conversion he had with his wife that he reversed the "transaction" he did with her account because the customer filed complaints to their bank, and that it will suspend for now till the matter calms down. I asked him to give me the money to do it personally instead of hacking into my account. He got irritated and ordered my immediate brother to ransack my things and forcefully bring my passport to him which he did.

Before the close of the day, I got an e-mail alert that N650,000 has credited to my account and another e-mail that I debited the N650,000 to one MR Bleep? Whom I don't even know, via online transfer, western union. Fearing that I may be the scapegoat of a fraudulent transaction, I sent a mail to the bank dissocaiting myself from that transaction and demanding my account to be blocked and my text message settings re-enabled.

He got to know few months later, he was furious, used his wife, other siblings to pressure me to open the account, though he claimed he he's not doing anything fraudulent, he just said he's doing it to "survive" because of the recession. (He's well to do by the way). I refused.

November 2016, my 39yr old immediate brother got into a quarell with me and my Dad one morning while preparing for work, he was intoxicated as usual, I left for the gym, my dad went to the hospital. He traced me to the gym with two policemen, to arrest me on account that I didn't sweep the home, cook before I left home that morning. The guys at the gym where furious, because the accusations were not enough/meaningless to get one arrested. They refused to let me follow them.
He has almost got me arrested in the past out of his drunken state my first brother was the one who saved me.

My issue now is this;

1. Was this incidence a conspiracy to pressure me to open the account? He called my 1st brother before going to the police, though I couldn't correctly make sense out of their phone conversation (the same set of men who tried to get me arrested in the 1st incidence)

2. Why is he insisting on using only my account? Why not use his wife's?

On the other hand, he was one of the main contributors to my education, a part of me wants to believe that my thoughts are wrong. But I don't know what to make of this.

#presently am thinking of running away from home to start a new life, even if I have to survive by doing odd jobs! Since I haven't been able to secure a job.
Re: Are My Brothers Conspiring Together To Harass & Intimidate Me by NCANChairman(m): 12:18pm On Mar 31, 2017
What kind of story is this?

What's your tribe?

NCANChairman
Re: Are My Brothers Conspiring Together To Harass & Intimidate Me by buoye1(m): 12:31pm On Mar 31, 2017
This is really complicated... There's more to what you've narrated here i guess..... A lot of things we can't even understand but I'll advice you run away from home... Just hide for your life

2 Likes

Re: Are My Brothers Conspiring Together To Harass & Intimidate Me by tukdi: 12:34pm On Mar 31, 2017
Don't run away! Stay at home and address the issue at once! undecided
Re: Are My Brothers Conspiring Together To Harass & Intimidate Me by Nobody: 1:14pm On Mar 31, 2017
buoye1:
This is really complicated... There's more to what you've narrated here i guess..... A lot of things we can't even understand but I'll advice you run away from home... Just hide for your life

Its also complicated to even me myself.
Re: Are My Brothers Conspiring Together To Harass & Intimidate Me by yomi007k(m): 1:16pm On Mar 31, 2017
undecided

U sure ds is not a family curse?
Re: Are My Brothers Conspiring Together To Harass & Intimidate Me by Nobody: 1:19pm On Mar 31, 2017
yomi007k:
undecided

U sure ds is not a family curse?

How do you mean?
Re: Are My Brothers Conspiring Together To Harass & Intimidate Me by yomi007k(m): 1:21pm On Mar 31, 2017
biigdeek:


How do you mean?

Why shud ur own brothers want to implicate u n get u arrested for worthless excuses?

I think u need to stay far from them because dos guys can kill u if dey hv a clean opportunity.

2 Likes

Re: Are My Brothers Conspiring Together To Harass & Intimidate Me by yomi007k(m): 1:22pm On Mar 31, 2017
tukdi:
Don't run away! Stay at home and address the issue at once! undecided

This is a bad idea.
Re: Are My Brothers Conspiring Together To Harass & Intimidate Me by Nobody: 1:23pm On Mar 31, 2017
yomi007k:


Why shud ur own brothers want to implicate u n get u arrested for worthless excuses?

I think u need to stay far from them because dos guys can kill u if dey hv a clean opportunity.

My problem now is am not sure if they acted together, or if my immediate brother did it out of drunkeness.
Re: Are My Brothers Conspiring Together To Harass & Intimidate Me by yomi007k(m): 1:26pm On Mar 31, 2017
biigdeek:


My problem now is am not sure if they acted together, or if my immediate brother did it out of drunkeness.

Drunkenness or not, so long as dey can lose control of dem selves den no one is safe.
Imagine he gets drunk n remember u did smtin against him, he gets a knife wen ur asleep. .....you need to be logical n not emotional.


Those guys aint ur brothers, ur jus related by blood.

9 Likes

Re: Are My Brothers Conspiring Together To Harass & Intimidate Me by Pureheart91(m): 2:07pm On Mar 31, 2017
biigdeek:


Its also complicated to even me myself.

Bro this ur story, i think dere's more dan what meets d eyes...Meanwhile from ur writeup it seems u are close to dad, if so talk to DAD and let him see reasons with you why you need to standout for yourslf dis wud help facilitate his blessings and also help in securin you a temporary plc outside ur home where you can startup your own life.

Meanwhile it's said Wisdom is profitable to the wise, ACT WISELY.

1 Like

Re: Are My Brothers Conspiring Together To Harass & Intimidate Me by tukdi: 2:50pm On Mar 31, 2017
yomi007k:


This is a bad idea.

In my own opinion, it's better to address the issue once and for all!

When you run away, the problem doesn't also run away, it lingers till you are back!

N/B: Don't forget that your family is not your workplace or school that you can easily run away and return when you feel like! undecided

Above all, pray to God for wisdom before you take any decision and also surrender everything to God! cool

Cheers!!! cool

1 Like

Re: Are My Brothers Conspiring Together To Harass & Intimidate Me by yomi007k(m): 2:54pm On Mar 31, 2017
tukdi:


In my own opinion, it's better to address the issue once and for all!

When you run away, the problem doesn't also run away, it lingers till you are back!

N/B: Don't forget that your family is not your workplace or school that you can easily run away and return when you feel like! undecided

Above all, pray to God for wisdom before you take any decision and also surrender everything to God! cool


Cheers!!! cool

I understand ur point but dos elder brothers dnt seem like reasonable ppl one csn speak wt, dy seem like ppl u hire soldiers to deal with.

1 Like

Re: Are My Brothers Conspiring Together To Harass & Intimidate Me by Acidosis(m): 3:01pm On Mar 31, 2017
Sorry, your brothers have hijacked the home from your dad.


There is nothing you can do since your dad has lost control of his household.


Continue to survive, whenever you're grown enough to survive alone, take the lessons and move out of the house.

What are the lessons?

1. Always take charge of your house. Rebuke your kids right from when they are small.

2. Only give birth to the number of kids you can effectively manage. If you can't manage 7, try 2, 1 or 3.

3. Above all, allow God's principles reign in your home.

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Re: Are My Brothers Conspiring Together To Harass & Intimidate Me by Nobody: 3:12pm On Mar 31, 2017
They will only treat you this way if you have not been cooperative and helpful to the family
Re: Are My Brothers Conspiring Together To Harass & Intimidate Me by tukdi: 3:16pm On Mar 31, 2017
yomi007k:


I understand ur point but dos elder brothers dnt seem like reasonable ppl one csn speak wt, dy seem like ppl u hire soldiers to deal with.

Engage them in an argument and also charge them to disclose the offence you've committed against them! cool


If you don't know what you've done knowingly or unknowingly that has angered them, how are you going to settle the problem?

I still say it categorically and unequivocally that you must confront them and if they don't disclose to you what your offence is, then they should forever hold their breath!

cool
Re: Are My Brothers Conspiring Together To Harass & Intimidate Me by Nobody: 3:26pm On Mar 31, 2017
Pidgin2:
They will only treat you this way if you have not been cooperative and helpful to the family

If you telling me to open the account, then I can't, I can't allow myself to be used as a scapegoat for ones wrong behaviour, what if he is under the radar of the bank officials? What if something goes wrong? And am held up for something I didn't do. I politely expressed my concerns to him, but he saw it as an insult. I appreciate the assistance he gave to me, and hope to reciprocate it someday when I start working, but I can't do what he asked me to do.

4 Likes

Re: Are My Brothers Conspiring Together To Harass & Intimidate Me by Nobody: 3:38pm On Mar 31, 2017
tukdi:


Engage them in an argument and also charge them to disclose the offence you've committed against them! cool


If you don't know what you've done knowingly or unknowingly that has angered them, how are you going to settle the problem?

I still say it categorically and unequivocally that you must confront them and if they don't disclose to you what your offence is, then they should forever hold their breath!

cool

Actually my Uncle held a meeting on the issue, was asking him questions, he didn't say anything gave him the silent treatment. He was furious and warned him never to try it again. My other Siblings said they are after family Unity, that whatever he does I should ignore and accept that he's family.
Re: Are My Brothers Conspiring Together To Harass & Intimidate Me by tukdi: 3:55pm On Mar 31, 2017
biigdeek:


Actually my Uncle held a meeting on the issue, was asking him questions, he didn't say anything gave him the silent treatment. He was furious and warned him never to try it again. My other Siblings said they are after family Unity, that whatever he does I should ignore and accept that he's family.

Now you're talking! Stay in that house with your dad but start hustling!

Please don't ask them for any favour again, just maintain your lane!

Don't be soft with them again so that they don't trample on your rights again!

Very soon, they will regret their actions!
Re: Are My Brothers Conspiring Together To Harass & Intimidate Me by Alphaoscar: 4:00pm On Mar 31, 2017
biigdeek:


Actually my Uncle held a meeting on the issue, was asking him questions, he didn't say anything gave him the silent treatment. He was furious and warned him never to try it again. My other Siblings said they are after family Unity, that whatever he does I should ignore and accept that he's family.





I think I know what your brother is using your account for.



There are some customers that will bring excess money above the deposit limit to the bank, what most tellers do is to temporarily lodge the money in another account ( with the knowledge of the customer most of the times ) and the money will be moved from your account once it's OK to do that . This money happen within 24hours and everything is done and settled.
Re: Are My Brothers Conspiring Together To Harass & Intimidate Me by Nobody: 4:26pm On Mar 31, 2017
Alphaoscar:






I think I know what your brother is using your account for.



There are some customers that will bring excess money above the deposit limit to the bank, what most tellers do is to temporarily lodge the money in another account ( with the knowledge of the customer most of the times ) and the money will be moved from your account once it's OK to do that . This money happen within 24hours and everything is done and settled.

Is it ethical?
Why did he use force to get my international passport?
Why did he disable my text message settings?
Why did he insist on mine alone, why not use others?
Somehow I know he makes money from the arrangement, cos he told me that he was doing it to "survive", surprisely you didn't mention anything about how the banker makes profit from such arrangement.

2 Likes

Re: Are My Brothers Conspiring Together To Harass & Intimidate Me by Alphaoscar: 4:32pm On Mar 31, 2017
biigdeek:


Is it ethical?
Why did he use force to get my international passport?
Why did he disable my text message settings?
Why did he insist on mine alone, why not use others?
Somehow I know he makes money from the arrangement, cos he told me that he was doing it to "survive", surprisely you didn't mention anything about how the banker makes profit from such arrangement.


I am not a banker nor your brother so I am not in a position to tell you how he's using your account to make money.
Re: Are My Brothers Conspiring Together To Harass & Intimidate Me by Nobody: 4:36pm On Mar 31, 2017
Alphaoscar:



I am not a banker nor your brother so I am not in a position to tell you how he's using your account to make money.

Just wanted to be sure if we are talking about the same thing, and if its not a shady stuff.
Re: Are My Brothers Conspiring Together To Harass & Intimidate Me by Nobody: 5:08pm On Mar 31, 2017
As for your alcoholic brother, being drunk makes a person more expressive. They would say everything they bottled up inside while sober.
What he says is exactly how he feels about your dad.

and for your Banker brother who wants to use your account for monkey business, with no respect towards you or your feelings, I say it's sad. which leads me to the question - How were you guys brought up?

Was your upbringing based on love or fear?

Why is your dad powerless?

There is more to this issue than this.

1 Like

Re: Are My Brothers Conspiring Together To Harass & Intimidate Me by Nobody: 5:44pm On Mar 31, 2017
Joavid:
As for your alcoholic brother, being drunk makes a person more expressive. They would say everything they bottled up inside while sober.
What he says is exactly how he feels about your dad.

and for your Banker brother who wants to use your account for monkey business, with no respect towards you or your feelings, I say it's sad. which leads me to the question - How were you guys brought up?

Was your upbringing based on love or fear?

Why is your dad powerless?

There is more to this issue than this.


My dad suffered a stroke 3 years ago, he is strong though but not fully balanced while walking. I think it may have impacted his self esteem. My mom is late.
Re: Are My Brothers Conspiring Together To Harass & Intimidate Me by sisisioge: 6:30pm On Mar 31, 2017
Since your 39yrs old immediate elder brother has failed to launch, biko you do. Leave the house and move to a far away place. As per your account, kuku go and close it at the bank and open another in a different bank.As per your dad, na him born bad pikin, na him wahala e be. That's all.

1 Like

Re: Are My Brothers Conspiring Together To Harass & Intimidate Me by Sijo01(f): 6:43pm On Mar 31, 2017
Whatever you choose to do start by closing that account of yours.
Re: Are My Brothers Conspiring Together To Harass & Intimidate Me by greatgod2012(f): 6:51pm On Mar 31, 2017
RIP to your mum! I believe if your mum is still alive, she would have gotten to the root of this matter, with woman wisdom!

Speedy recovery to your dad, the stroke incapacitated your dad, so, there's little he can do!

To you, move out from that house, start a new life devoid of depending on your brothers!

As for your account, close that very account and open another one in another bank without their knowledge, and with that, your account will be free from shady transactions!

More wisdom to you in handling your brothers and life generally!

3 Likes

Re: Are My Brothers Conspiring Together To Harass & Intimidate Me by MummyIMadeIt: 11:00pm On Apr 01, 2017
Acidosis:
Sorry, your brothers have hijacked the home from your dad.


There is nothing you can do since your dad has lost control of his household.


Continue to survive, whenever you're grown enough to survive alone, take the lessons and move out of the house.

What are the lessons?

1. Always take charge of your house. Rebuke your kids right from when they are small.

2. Only give birth to the number of kids you can effectively manage. If you can't manage 7, try 2, 1 or 3.

3. Above all, allow God's principles reign in your home.


So you sabee God cool
Re: Are My Brothers Conspiring Together To Harass & Intimidate Me by Acidosis(m): 11:08pm On Apr 01, 2017
MummyIMadeIt:
[/b]
So you sabee God cool
Yes na
Re: Are My Brothers Conspiring Together To Harass & Intimidate Me by MummyIMadeIt: 11:38pm On Apr 01, 2017
Acidosis:


Yes na
shocked shocked shocked wink

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