Recently I got into a fight with my elder brother..nd I broke his nose..it was a very bad thing for me ..but its jst d end product of wat my dad has been planting inside of me

It all started THUS

My dad is a master comparer ..wen we wer younger ...
he wuld compare us (me nd my brothers) to anyone he deems fit even if dat someone is worst Dan us..

.comparisons like

*--.why are we not leading d youth choir in our church like d pastor's son
*--why can't i take d first position in my class like Camoru Omo Iya alata
*-- why cant I win d scholarship like lagbaja even if my school is not offering any

I could remember last two years..a relative came visiting..dis guy recently came back from Obodo oyibo..nd he was forming all single nd holy..

here comes my dad again..comparing us to him..saying d guy has gone to a foreign land nd he was successful all because he was holy nd he abstained from women..

nd all we do here is think and gist about women(we are 6 boys)..we didn't take it lightly wit him..but we let it slide.

.only to get invited to a party by dis holy obodo oyibo guy..nd we met him rocking d biggest ukwu we've ever seen..Chai!!..God punish devil

Back to my main reason for writing dis..
My dad ridiculed me so much with my brothers success.. he wuld use every opportunity to compare me nd him

my brother is a graduate nd works for a big tech company.. while i'm still a 300level student

The comparison got so bad I started hating my brother..not because he's already successful Dan me...but my dad rubs it on my face always..like I should jst graduate sharp sharp nd start working

long story short.... we fought nd I broke his nose
NOW MY QUESTION IS
I know my dad wants to motivate us with d comparisons
But is it ideal to motivate someone( brother.. friend..anyone) by comparing him to another person..

nd if ur a victim like me..talk ur story

We love our siblings doesn't mean we don't have blood running through our veins .my elder sister had always been my standard ,someone i 'must' be like .she's the quiet,intelligent ,Godly and decent kind of girl while i got my first tattoo immediately i got admission . I was reminded everyday how my sister graduated with a 2.1 and i needed to be better than her ,finish school,serve,get a job,get a 2nd degree and get married .The HARDEST THING IS HAVING TO WALK IN SOMEONE ELSE'S SHOES .At the end of the day ,everybody with their fate abeg .I 'envied' my sister a lil but not to the point of fighting,hating or not wishing her well . Creating an atmosphere for healthy competitions among siblings is fine but unnecessary comparison is a NO NO!

i will apportion the blame on nobody but nonetheless I'll ask you to look inwardly and try to make peace with your brother, father and yourself. no outsider (nairalanders) can understand your family especially your father more than you do. Father's have their respective ways of getting at their boy's, I'm talking from experience, even at that blood they say is thicker than water. try not to look for who to blame, rather, swallow your ego, apologize and make peace with your brother. brothers always gat your back even when your father can't...
you never knows what the future holds.
make peace.

There must be someone to blame but achievers take responsibility of their actions but that does not mean i support the action of your dad,just that their could have been a more gentleman way to handle the issue other than fighting your elder bros who is not even the cause of your annoyance.#learntomanageyouranger

I'm weak

Just a few questions....

Have you helped fix your brother's nose?

If yes, how does he feel now?

If no, what are you waiting for?

Did your brother break your nose too?

If yes, have you fixed yours?

If no, why didn't he break yours?

...........................the father is wrong........the yoruba say "ta ba fi omo wey omo aa kan lukan pa ni " meaning, if you compare A to B you'll just beat B to death cos he is not like A

Acode:
Recently I got into a fight with my elder brother..nd I broke his nose..it was a very bad thing for me ..but its jst d end product of wat my dad has been planting inside of me

It all started THUS

My dad is a master comparer ..wen we wer younger ...
he wuld compare us (me nd my brothers) to anyone he deems fit even if dat someone is worst Dan us..

.comparisons like

*--.why are we not leading d youth choir in our church like d pastor's son
*--why can't i take d first position in my class like Camoru Omo Iya alata
*-- why cant I win d scholarship like lagbaja even if my school is not offering any

I could remember last two years..a relative came visiting..dis guy recently came back from Obodo oyibo..nd he was forming all single nd holy..

here comes my dad again..comparing us to him..saying d guy has gone to a foreign land nd he was successful all because he was holy nd he abstained from women..

nd all we do here is think and gist about women(we are 6 boys)..we didn't take it lightly wit him..but we let it slide.

.only to get invited to a party by dis holy obodo oyibo guy..nd we met him rocking d biggest ukwu we've ever seen..Chai!!..God punish devil

Back to my main reason for writing dis..
My dad ridiculed me so much with my brothers success.. he wuld use every opportunity to compare me nd him

my brother is a graduate nd works for a big tech company.. while i'm still a 300level student

The comparison got so bad I started hating my brother..not because he's already successful Dan me...but my dad rubs it on my face always..like I should jst graduate sharp sharp nd start working

long story short.... we fought nd I broke his nose
NOW MY QUESTION IS
I know my dad wants to motivate us with d comparisons
But is it ideal to motivate someone( brother.. friend..anyone) by comparing him to another person..

nd if ur a victim like me..talk ur story

Your dad might have issues but the real issue I can deduce here is that you are a fooolish young man. Why? see the the parts I emboldened, do you expect you and your ELDER brother to be at the same level? Instead of breaking his nose if you hit his neck and he dies will you tell the judge your father caused it? Why cant you focus this energy you have into your studies so you can achieve something for yourself? The fact that you even had the audacity to raise a hand against your elder brother shows the type of person you are and maybe you really deserve how your father treats you.

Hmm

Sounds like a nollywood script. But issokay.


If its real, pele.

Crap

e le gi di ga..

U broke ur elder brother's nose and had the guts to post it here? Ur matter weak me bros

It is not advisable to compare two pple because no one knows wat happens behind the scene.. Everyone should live his life the right way.. I hate when I am being compared to anybody.. It really pisses me off.. I pray I don't kill because of that oo

Most African parents do this shii a lot and it's really crazy. Even a set of identical twin who spent 9 months in the same womb got different destiny

I hate comparison ....not fair at all

Ur broke ur ELDER brother nose n u still boldly came here to tell us... u must be very proud of ur achievement... JOHN CENA oya come n shake us..
MUMU u better go n appologise to him.
Becox u hav hurt his ego

Its meant to motivate but its hardly the case

You are already cursed for raising your hand to beat your brother.
Comparison motivates me,i have a terrible brother as well but i don't really care about what he does

Comparison is not fair.

The situation is about your dad comparing you with outsiders and your siblings! How did it result to you fighting and 'busting' your elder bro's noise?

Why would you fight with your elder brother in the first place

As an informed person, you should know your left from your right. Your father meant well though his approach might be somehow harsh

Hmm