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Marry and Grow In Love Or Marry The Person You Love, Which One Is Better? - Family (2) - Nairaland

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What Keeps A Marriage Together - Love Or Respect? / I Told My Female Friend That I Found Who To Marry And She's Now Angry With Me. / I'm About Losing The Man I Love And Being Pressured To Marry The One I Never Did (2) (3) (4)

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Re: Marry and Grow In Love Or Marry The Person You Love, Which One Is Better? by Nobody: 2:45pm On Jul 23, 2017
elantraceey:
Marry someone you know possesses qualities you admire and you're attracted to, love will blossom anytime.
you can't love someone that does not have the qualities you want. Love is a verb. Qualities are adjectives... it names an attribute of a person. So you got to love the attributes thus loving the person. All points to the the doing word Love

1 Like

Re: Marry and Grow In Love Or Marry The Person You Love, Which One Is Better? by jaygem(m): 2:45pm On Jul 23, 2017
blackbeau1:
Marry the one you love but make sure he/she is your friend too
You said it all! Case closed

1 Like

Re: Marry and Grow In Love Or Marry The Person You Love, Which One Is Better? by Heromaniaa: 2:46pm On Jul 23, 2017
Re: Marry and Grow In Love Or Marry The Person You Love, Which One Is Better? by seunny4lif(m): 2:46pm On Jul 23, 2017
remi1444:
marry the one you love, I wish this my Edo state crush can push me from friendzone.
Worse position

Re: Marry and Grow In Love Or Marry The Person You Love, Which One Is Better? by kaypound(m): 2:47pm On Jul 23, 2017
Love is never enough...
Marry your friend that understands you.

1 Like

Re: Marry and Grow In Love Or Marry The Person You Love, Which One Is Better? by Sexyolori(f): 2:47pm On Jul 23, 2017
BleSSedMee:
Marrying for love is great! But love is not always enough for a long lasting marriage.

I'd say marry someone you would have unwavering respect for no matter what.

Thus respect is the main ingredient of a good marriage. Then comes love, commitment. And the rest.


Not forgetting the overall, putting God in the center of your relationship/marriage is the sure route to its success.
Love is never enough to sustain a marriage,there are other things involved but to have a successful married life love must be involved. Love will birth respect, care, tolerance etc.

1 Like

Re: Marry and Grow In Love Or Marry The Person You Love, Which One Is Better? by banmee(m): 2:47pm On Jul 23, 2017
Where do all this rubbish threads come from? I hope seun is not paying them for this poor quality.
Re: Marry and Grow In Love Or Marry The Person You Love, Which One Is Better? by Humility017(m): 2:47pm On Jul 23, 2017
BleSSedMee:
Marrying for love is great! But love is not always enough for a long lasting marriage.

I'd say marry someone you would have unwavering respect for no matter what.

Thus respect is the main ingredient of a good marriage. Then comes love, commitment. And the rest.


Not forgetting the overall, putting God in the center of your relationship/marriage is the sure route to its success.
well said....also marry someone that whose personality is compatible wit you....
feelings sometimes goes down....but it is the understanding and compactibility that keeps both together. ..

1 Like

Re: Marry and Grow In Love Or Marry The Person You Love, Which One Is Better? by iRepNaija1: 2:48pm On Jul 23, 2017
Marry the person you love. If you do, you'll want to put your best foot forward and make the relationship fulfilling and long-lasting. Besides, who's to say that those people who marry first without the love find love later on in the marriage? Despite what people claim, you might not have a very open mind when marrying someone you don't love.

Edit: I forgot to add something. No one can determine the future. But wouldn't it be nice to look forward to it with the person you love? That way, no matter what the future holds, it won't matter because you'll be together.

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Re: Marry and Grow In Love Or Marry The Person You Love, Which One Is Better? by fatymore(f): 2:49pm On Jul 23, 2017
Marry the one you feel comfortable with... What am I saying marry your friend....
Re: Marry and Grow In Love Or Marry The Person You Love, Which One Is Better? by Humility017(m): 2:49pm On Jul 23, 2017
alexialin:
Marry someone that share the same values with you, both of u should be attracted to each other (very important) . Then Be mentally alike and with time, love will grow in marriage.


And there is everything possibility u marry the one u love? U may end up hating the person before the end of one year of marriage.
Falling in love doesn't guarantee success in marriage. It's simply a recipe to the ingredients needed in marriage.
you're so intelligent.....
bless you for this
Re: Marry and Grow In Love Or Marry The Person You Love, Which One Is Better? by claremont(m): 2:49pm On Jul 23, 2017
The concept of love is overrated, and with time, it will die a natural death. The reason why our forbears had long-lasting marriages wasn't because of love, it was because they got married to someone they were compatible with. Compatibility means a lot of things, I don't have time to write about it here.

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Re: Marry and Grow In Love Or Marry The Person You Love, Which One Is Better? by free2ryhme: 2:55pm On Jul 23, 2017
Trueigbo:
I was discussing with a friend yesterday. Our fore fathers marry their wives without knowing them and they grew in love building wonderful families.

Today the reverse is the case, as people marry the one they love but the rate of marriage failure is on the increase.


My question is should we marry the person we love or should we marry and grow in love with the person.



Do wetin come your mind as the world will not be living with you in your house
Re: Marry and Grow In Love Or Marry The Person You Love, Which One Is Better? by plaetton: 2:55pm On Jul 23, 2017
Benita27:
Nothing will make me marry someone I don't love with the hopes of growing in love in the future.

Marry whom you love.
My dear, do you know what love really is?
Love has different Facets.
Sexual love, which most people know as love, is simply a chemical reaction, an illusion that inevitably wears off sooner or later.
The deeper you think you are in love with someone, the deeper the illusion.
Such love has grand expectations, desires and demands.
Heartbreak and unhappiness comes from the agony of unfulfilled expectations and desires.
This love always tend to fail the test of time.

Now, on the other hand , the love that grows and evolves over time is sturdier and more resilient, having been built stage by stage on foundations of trust, respect, friendship and family cohesion.

So, here , we see here that one type of love grows with time, while the other tend to wither with time.

9 Likes

Re: Marry and Grow In Love Or Marry The Person You Love, Which One Is Better? by perdollar(m): 2:55pm On Jul 23, 2017
buhari stole my TSA of 6yrs but thank God I found my GOC.
Re: Marry and Grow In Love Or Marry The Person You Love, Which One Is Better? by Nobody: 2:55pm On Jul 23, 2017
alexialin:
Marry someone that share the same values with you, both of u should be attracted to each other (very important) . Then Be mentally alike and with time, love will grow in marriage.


And there is everything possibility u marry the one u love? U may end up hating the person before the end of one year of marriage.
Falling in love doesn't guarantee success in marriage. It's simply a recipe to the ingredients needed in marriage.
are you saying when you "grow in love, you can't fall out of love"... compare the 2 bolded. Or do you grow forever in love. It's easy, just as when one starts courting, one may not really be ready to fall in love but at sometime, you realise the person is so awesome and then you fall in love. If someone does not share same values with you, you can't love in the first instance. What many call love is lust an infatuation. Will you remain by your partner in hard times? Will you go hungry because he cannot provide at sometime? Will you sacrifice your last for your partner? When you can answer that question genuinely, you will know if you love your partner. Yes, marriage is sweet but truth is its no joke. It's best life teaches one lessons when still courting, it will help in making some decisions. As a guy, have you had friends you didn't have a fight with, if yes... then you don't have any true friends. There are people who have been friends since childhood but stop being friends after one disagreement. These ar people that grew in love. Now imagine, living with a friend all the remaining days of your life.
Re: Marry and Grow In Love Or Marry The Person You Love, Which One Is Better? by merryossai(m): 2:56pm On Jul 23, 2017
not minding d fact that pre marriage relationship can b deceptive at times, that doesn't mean we marry the person we don't love, but remember that love is continuous process, so therefore its important we love and respect d person we marry. #after marriage love is more essential.

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Re: Marry and Grow In Love Or Marry The Person You Love, Which One Is Better? by Nobody: 2:57pm On Jul 23, 2017
MediumStout:
Most people abuse the word love out of context. Many equate sexual attractions and infatuation/obsession for love. 80% of people using the word love don't even love one another. Love is never a prerequisite for a long lasting marriage. Tolerance, communication and understanding is the key to marital success. The reason why marriages don't last these days is because the foundation is built on physical/material attractions of both partners and wrongly termed love. Love is not enough
I agree with your post on lust... Thats what we have in this present age. But saying love is not enough is a mis point. Everything needed to sustain a marriage comes with love.
Re: Marry and Grow In Love Or Marry The Person You Love, Which One Is Better? by Evidenx(m): 3:01pm On Jul 23, 2017
MARRY THE PERSON YOU LOVE AND TOGETHER BOTH OF YOU GROW THE EXISTING LOVE TO BE MORE AND MORE.... WISDOM RIGHT? � �
Re: Marry and Grow In Love Or Marry The Person You Love, Which One Is Better? by MediumStout(m): 3:03pm On Jul 23, 2017
majekdom2:
I agree with your post on lust... Thats what we have in this present age. But saying love is not enough is a mis point. Everything needed to sustain a marriage comes with love.


My guy whatever your definition of love means is known to you. That thing most people call love quickly fade of between partners within few years of marriage. Love may be active at the starting point but you need tolerance, understanding of your partner and ability to forgive easily to prevent untimely divorce. Since we are not perfect i wont agree with the word love. If you love someone for real you won't hide your finances from your partner. You won't cheat on someone you love and so on which is prevalent among young couples chewing the word love in their mouth like gums but act contrary to their thoughts

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Re: Marry and Grow In Love Or Marry The Person You Love, Which One Is Better? by Nobody: 3:04pm On Jul 23, 2017
plaetton:

My dear, do you know what love really is?
Love has different Facets.
Sexual love, which most people know as love, is simply a chemical reaction, an illusion that inevitably wears off sooner or later.
The deeper you think you are in love with someone, the deeper the illusion.
Such is has grand expectations, desires and demands. Heartbreak and unhappiness comes from the agony of unfulfilled expectations and desires.
This love always tend to fail the test of time.

Now, on the other hand , the love that grows and evolves over time is sturdier and more resilient, having been built stage by stage on foundations of trust, respect, friendship and family cohesion.

So, here , we see here that one type of love grows with time, while the other tend to wither with time.
that is lust... Love is love, same way truth is truth! A man that does not love his fellow man cannot love a woman. A man that steals and can kill a fellow man cannot love a woman. He is either in lust o obsessed with that being. Thats how it works. I don't mean to come religious. The bible says, Love your neighbour as yourself even if you can't love completely, love. The same bible says, husband's, love your wife. I grow to love someone when the person pleases you in all. God loves us regardless of our sins. But he shows more love to those that please him. Thats how it work. And who are those that please God, the ones that share his values... so you can't love someone who does not share your value. You can't be friends in the first instance.

1 Like

Re: Marry and Grow In Love Or Marry The Person You Love, Which One Is Better? by Nobody: 3:05pm On Jul 23, 2017
claremont:
The concept of love is overrated, and with time, it will die a natural death. The reason why our forbears had long-lasting marriages wasn't because of love, it was because they got married to someone they were compatible with. Compatibility means a lot of things, I don't have time to write about it here.
can you love someone you are not compatible with.. He'll No. The movies have made us to have a different understanding of love. All these telemundo, romeo and juliet kind of love. Love is broad itself!
Re: Marry and Grow In Love Or Marry The Person You Love, Which One Is Better? by bobnatlo(m): 3:08pm On Jul 23, 2017
Abeg marry the one u luv then u can graduate/master in lov
Re: Marry and Grow In Love Or Marry The Person You Love, Which One Is Better? by plus7(m): 3:09pm On Jul 23, 2017
Trueigbo:
I was discussing with a friend yesterday. Our fore fathers marry their wives without knowing them and they grew in love building wonderful families.

Today the reverse is the case, as people marry the one they love but the rate of marriage failure is on the increase.


My question is should we marry the person we love or should we marry and grow in love with the person.



The question that needs answer is what has changed between the time of our fore fathers and now?

Lots have changed, our parents have this enduring spirit and patience.....

On the other hand, now we leave in the NOW, we want everything now, we can't wait for anything.

That being said the situation is very dicey.

My one cent is marry who you love(but not those you see in movies and read about in novels, they don't happen most of the time).
It is better and could save a lots......
Re: Marry and Grow In Love Or Marry The Person You Love, Which One Is Better? by Juliearth(f): 3:10pm On Jul 23, 2017
Love is overrated...it takes morethan love to make a relationship/marriage work.

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Re: Marry and Grow In Love Or Marry The Person You Love, Which One Is Better? by Nobody: 3:10pm On Jul 23, 2017
MediumStout:



My guy whatever your definition of love means is known to you. That thing most people call love quickly fade of between partners within few years of marriage. Love may be active at the starting point but you need tolerance, understanding of your partner and ability to forgive easily to prevent untimely divorce. Since we are not perfect i wont agree with the word love. If you love someone for real you won't hide your finances from your partner. You won't cheat on someone you love and so on which is prevalent among young couples chewing the word love in their mouth like gums but act contrary to their thoughts
Good you said, my understanding of love. I use my biblical knowledge of love. 1st cor 13:4-end. If you are a christain you can read that. You will see all of those attributes you mention comes with true love.
Re: Marry and Grow In Love Or Marry The Person You Love, Which One Is Better? by Nobody: 3:12pm On Jul 23, 2017
Juliearth:
Love is overrated...it takes morethan love to make a relationship/marriage work.
true love never fails.
Re: Marry and Grow In Love Or Marry The Person You Love, Which One Is Better? by mrdna(m): 3:14pm On Jul 23, 2017
Does love exist?
Re: Marry and Grow In Love Or Marry The Person You Love, Which One Is Better? by TheMainMan: 3:14pm On Jul 23, 2017
Humility017:

you're so intelligent.....
bless you for this
... wish i could like dt comment a million times

1 Like

Re: Marry and Grow In Love Or Marry The Person You Love, Which One Is Better? by Humility017(m): 3:17pm On Jul 23, 2017
TheMainMan:
... wish i could like dt comment a million times
seriously. ...I have always love her comments.
she is very knowledgeable

2 Likes

Re: Marry and Grow In Love Or Marry The Person You Love, Which One Is Better? by ehioziosa: 3:19pm On Jul 23, 2017
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Re: Marry and Grow In Love Or Marry The Person You Love, Which One Is Better? by MrIcredible: 3:19pm On Jul 23, 2017
Benita27:
Nothing will make me marry someone I don't love with the hopes of growing in love in the future.

Marry whom you love.
Marry the one that loves you and (you) think you grow in love with...

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