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Re: My New Wife Hates My Family Without Provocation by Ashley86400: 1:11am On Sep 14, 2017 |
Dude, getting your wife to like your family, especially your mother is like getting a shark and a lion to cohabit. It's just not possible. All women hate their (mother) in laws. Look on the bright side, at least your wife is not a pretender. 1 Like |
Re: My New Wife Hates My Family Without Provocation by silverspringle(f): 1:11am On Sep 14, 2017 |
amliftedhigher:Lemme tell you @op, you see that girl, she will so deal with u. Your family made mistake by showing her so much love. Now, she doesn't even fear them when she was supposed to be proving herself so she could be accepted, now she's feeling like a queen. She should just thank God she's not marrying into my family, I would have taught her a lesson. 2 Likes |
Re: My New Wife Hates My Family Without Provocation by Taryur3(m): 1:30am On Sep 14, 2017 |
This is similar to one of my ex behavior.She is a medical doctor and she always feel big to respect my own sisters.Her annual income is what I make in 2months, I don't see any reason she should hate my own sisters that supported me tru out my days of struggle. The day things fell apart between us was the day my immediate elder sis and her kids visited me. My girlfriend cooked a delicious soup and some meats in the house. I was surprised how she served my visitors Chinchin and a cup of water. I returned home from a journey and I was baffled to see my sister and her kids eating fries when a soup is st home. As a man, I called my girlfriend to the bedroom, and asked, darling why chinchin, when you cooked a good soup in the house. Her response shocked me. Did I cook the soup because of them? Chai, my head boiled in a seconds but I controlled every situation with a little smile. I walked out of the bedroom to meet my sister and I laugh and make some jokes just too cool myself as if nothing is bordering me.I took them to Chiken republic where we had a good dinner together . My fiancée stayed back home cos she knew she won't be comfortable following us. That same night I let her know how my siblings are so important to me. Since she can't serve my visitors from the soup she cooked, I made up my mind not to eat from her food too. The battle began and I started acting strange before any wedding plan. To cut my epistle short, I broke up with her on valentine day after series of correction which she failed to take heed to. Marrying her will be a disaster within me and my siblings. Even her immediate elder brother confirmed how wicked she was while growing up....Op, that lady is not your wife. A broken relationship is better than a shattered marriage. run for your dear life. 12 Likes 1 Share |
Re: My New Wife Hates My Family Without Provocation by phoebe69: 1:40am On Sep 14, 2017 |
Have you clearly let this lady know that your siblings trained you in school? If not, please do. Then tell her that you can't go through with the wedding with a woman who hates your family. Act nonchalant towards the wedding for three days and also don't call or answer her calls for these three days and let's see what she does. Also tell her parents about her behavior and plead with them to help you ask her what is wrong. If there isn't no remorse and you still marry her, the marriage won't last or you might be forced to take solace in a woman who is more accommodating(girlfriend) outside your home after your wedding. Believe me when I say that it'll only get worse after the wedding. 2 Likes |
Re: My New Wife Hates My Family Without Provocation by urchmoni44: 1:48am On Sep 14, 2017 |
This hatred without reason shouldn't be taken lightly, just call off the wedding 4 Likes |
Re: My New Wife Hates My Family Without Provocation by laudate: 2:00am On Sep 14, 2017 |
obayaya: She is not in awe of them, she hates/despises them! She is the possessive type, who wants everything to go her own way. Did you read the OP's subsequent post about how she flared up, and said that his sister was "controlling him" simply because his sister got him the services of a different vendor who charged him 280k as against the 400k his wife wanted to spend? amliftedhigher: A woman who truly loves a man, would at least make some effort to show some affection to his family by getting closer to them. A woman who loves a man, would be concerned about the things that matter to such a man! My cousin's wife used to sit down with his mum, because she wanted to hear about all the pranks my cousin got up to, when he was younger! They would both laugh as my aunt recounted the stories, and today both women have formed a strong bond! The OP's wife has not made any attempt to build any kind of relationship with her in-laws, instead she even expresses anger, whenever the guy gets close to his family. And from his report, his family has not done anything to the wife, to justify her ill will towards them. This woman will alienate him from his family - just watch. And she would end up putting him under her thumb in order to have him at her beck & call. He should just have a showdown/confrontation with her about the issue, and clear the air once and for all. A broken engagement is far better and easier to manage, than a broken marriage. cc: amliftedhigher 3 Likes |
Re: My New Wife Hates My Family Without Provocation by alhajiwada(m): 2:04am On Sep 14, 2017 |
amliftedhigher: For you to even be confused on what to do in this situation speaks volumes about the kind of man you are. So now that you are 'comfortable' you want to abandon those who toiled for your success,abi? Issoryt! 2 Likes |
Re: My New Wife Hates My Family Without Provocation by MNDY(m): 2:07am On Sep 14, 2017 |
castrol180: As in ehn, the op vexed me so much that I transferred some portion of the aggression to the people here advising him. Such a spineless man I swear down. I will never allow anybody (man & woman) to use my head in this life. It is very annoying that some people actually allow it. The reason why the matter he has raised confuses him actually confuses me. Even if he has invested too much into his union with the lady, it's not a valid excuse to be confused about this matter. To even think that he belongs to a good family...and he is here asking for opinions on whether or not to marry the lady in question. To the op, your major mistake was that you did not familiarize her with the family very well before the trad. Now, she is exhibiting what she concealed before with the hope that she has tied you to herself with the trad. (stupid mentality of some ladies). She is being defensive against any subsequent manipulations/control that she thinks your family will have over you (and herself especially) after you both settle down. 1 Like |
Re: My New Wife Hates My Family Without Provocation by laudate: 2:08am On Sep 14, 2017 |
gentleiphy: Wow!! What a great post! May God Almighty continue to increase the wisdom He has deposited in your life! 2 Likes |
Re: My New Wife Hates My Family Without Provocation by NaijaElba(m): 2:19am On Sep 14, 2017 |
It will be silly of you to discard your family because of one silly oloso that many guys have slept with before u engaged her...yet she is hating your family for no reason..young man its never too late to tame the idiot now..If she doesn't change use her as sex tool and get another girl. Stupid ladies everywhere. Some.will even pray for there mother in law to die before getting married. Please guys you need wake up and stop giving all these idiots chance to turn you against your family. |
Re: My New Wife Hates My Family Without Provocation by lovingyouhun: 2:20am On Sep 14, 2017 |
op I feel like chewing you! Some good comments have rolled in already, I've given likes to several so be ware. If you go ahead and wed this girl YOU HAVE DUG YOUR OWN GRAVE. Marriage is very delicate, look she will only pretend to love your family just to get into your home, trust me you will never have peace after that, she will make your life a living hell, please don't pretend like you can't see the future all because of love. Put a hold on the wedding so she knows you don't give a fück! And then if her reason for hating them is senseless please put an end to the relationship. You will find a well deserving girl cause you sound like a nice guy. Your family is precious, I know you love her senseless, please don't trade your family for love, you will hate yourself later 1 Like |
Re: My New Wife Hates My Family Without Provocation by laudate: 2:20am On Sep 14, 2017 |
nautybride: What do you mean??! Didn't you read his subsequent post about how she gets angry anytime he is on the phone with his family, and how she threw tantrums, because his sister got him a vendor that was charging 280k as against the 400k she wanted to spend? She ended up bad mouthing the sisters directly to him, and calling them "controlling!" Any woman who is in love with a man, would care about the same things he cares for! If she feels he is spineless, then why did she agree to marry him? Why not wait for a macho man with a backbone of steel? And you are here telling him to 'adjust.' Adjust to what? Her rude & disrespectful behaviour?? Or her irrational tantrums that will eventually succeed in driving a wedge between him and his family? cc: amliftedhigher 1 Like |
Re: My New Wife Hates My Family Without Provocation by Mrnairalandd: 2:28am On Sep 14, 2017 |
amliftedhigher: I don't know if anybody has said this to you cos i couldn't read all the comments. I want you to write this down today that you ll regret with tears if you marry that lady. I am talking from personal experience Marriage is a lifetime journey The biggest red flag for any man is what God has shown you. God loves you so much that this girl is showing all this madness now before you signed your miserable future with her. Let me tell you what is going on, she loves her family to death and ll do everything to get rid of your family so as to pave way for her family to take over your life completely. I was in the same shit but guess what, it was painful and difficult for me to let go cos i love her so much but i thought about my future and used that as my internal fighting force against the overwhelming feelings i have for her. Today, i am thanking God. Let me tell you a secret, the first thing to watch out for if you want to if a lady genuinely and truly love you is to watch her behaviour towards your family. Trust me, the first thing you ll notice in a woman that loves a man genuinely is how they ll be striving to be liked by your family. A woman ll go to any length to get close to your family so as to win you over completely. And finally, she has seen your weakness, the love you have for her. Don't do this cos you ll regret it sooner or later. Even if you talk to her now, she ll pretend to have accepted them so as to avoid the cancellation of your wedding but as soon as she moves in and give birth, you are finished with your family. 3 Likes |
Re: My New Wife Hates My Family Without Provocation by Chykes403: 2:28am On Sep 14, 2017 |
fk001: You and some oda people are talking because you havent fallen in love before. You shuldnt blame the man. You dont know how much he loves the lady. I only pray that he applies wisdom. God will show him a way 1 Like |
Re: My New Wife Hates My Family Without Provocation by laudate: 2:29am On Sep 14, 2017 |
Ashley86400:That is not true. Not all wives hate their mother-in-laws. I have seen many relationships, where both parties get along real well.... |
Re: My New Wife Hates My Family Without Provocation by Nackzy: 2:31am On Sep 14, 2017 |
Is that One wife?...bros Pls remember ur family All stood by you and supported u untill u became relevant and a successful man today... So whatever will make u turn against ur family Pls cut it off... Family is all... Blood is thicker than water |
Re: My New Wife Hates My Family Without Provocation by laudate: 2:36am On Sep 14, 2017 |
Mrnairalandd: Gbam!! You talk am well! 1 Like |
Re: My New Wife Hates My Family Without Provocation by Nobody: 2:52am On Sep 14, 2017 |
Marriage is a contract which can be dissolved, spouse can be replaced but your family ( parents, children and siblings) 're blood and can't be replaced. Let me tell you some truth: she doesn't love you AT ALL. She is just pretending cos someone who loves you genuinely will have that love transfer to all that concerns you effortlessly. Life is too short to settle down with someone with issues and she never show you anything oo.. you go see weeeeeeeeeen once you two start living together. This one na untimely death you wan buy for yourself. Abandon "ship" ASAP and don't look back. Don't even be friends with her afterwards. D's one fit plan bad for you No bi you go be the 1st to break marriage plans at the 11th hour and neither will you be the last. She caused it; she should live with the consequences. My 2cents. 1 Like |
Re: My New Wife Hates My Family Without Provocation by fk001(m): 3:16am On Sep 14, 2017 |
Chykes403: I have fallen in love before, but i will never embark on such silly act 1 Like |
Re: My New Wife Hates My Family Without Provocation by fk001(m): 3:17am On Sep 14, 2017 |
GoldHorse: Lol |
Re: My New Wife Hates My Family Without Provocation by Nobody: 3:20am On Sep 14, 2017 |
fk001: Very succinct, it's a shame that most men do not realise this. We're ready to sideline blood relatives for an ordinary stranger that was just met. |
Re: My New Wife Hates My Family Without Provocation by fk001(m): 3:26am On Sep 14, 2017 |
That's very silly of him, a woman can leave you whenever she feels like or at the slightest opportunity they get. The two are not even comparable. 1 Like |
Re: My New Wife Hates My Family Without Provocation by hakimi1974(m): 3:31am On Sep 14, 2017 |
Oyindidi:God bless you my sister. the question is not somehow offensive, it is highly offensive. my God which kind woman wrapper man be dis. o.p, call of the darn wedding, the biatch will never change. i am just so sick in my gut right now. 1 Like |
Re: My New Wife Hates My Family Without Provocation by segneyukk(m): 3:32am On Sep 14, 2017 |
Mr. be a man and stop acting weak... if you end up marrying her with that attitude you will have serious war to fight...because am seing you about to marry devil itself....my advice call off the so called wedding.... if you dont want a broken home 2 Likes |
Re: My New Wife Hates My Family Without Provocation by gentlechyke(m): 3:49am On Sep 14, 2017 |
Opakan2: Tribal Idiat. Ifay spank your brain now |
Re: My New Wife Hates My Family Without Provocation by Sanuzi100: 3:52am On Sep 14, 2017 |
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Re: My New Wife Hates My Family Without Provocation by Ndipe(m): 3:52am On Sep 14, 2017 |
Didnt you notice this during your courtship? You guys are now married, I wont recommend a divorce, Never! You have to arrive at a compromise to solve this problem. I wish you well. |
Re: My New Wife Hates My Family Without Provocation by hakimi1974(m): 3:55am On Sep 14, 2017 |
amliftedhigher:she never showed any of this attitude before the trad marriage. my guy congrats in advance, on your forthcoming union to a chameleonic biatch. nah the type of una dey fall mugu to simple scam. 3 Likes |
Re: My New Wife Hates My Family Without Provocation by DeRay98(m): 3:59am On Sep 14, 2017 |
amliftedhigher: Bro, this woman is a colonizer and she's going to keep your family away by constantly showing them nasty, unwelcome attitude. Once she succeeds in pushing them away from you, she takes control of you by whatever means she knows. Mysery is steering you in the eye, I just pity you. This is close to what my ex-wife did. She hide her thoughs and plan till about a year after marriage and started picking issues with my immediate elder sister who has been the pillar of our family and closest to me. But my Sister was not aware of it, I only got to know of her scheme and that she started accumulating fabricated " evidence" against my sister right from her first meeting with my Sister. The summary is that I refused to allow her manipulate me into a fight with my sister and she hated me hence. Things got of her hands and she moved out of our matrimonial home while I was away working abroad without a prio notice and my consent. My friend it's not too late to pull out. Get some male members of your family, call her parents and tell them that all ceremonies are suspended till further notice (if not outright cancellation of the and refund of dowry). If you accept entreaties and go on with it, once she's in your house she's going to make you pay for daring to "embarrass her and her family" with your threats. If you're weak enough to accept that "she 'll change after marriage" as lots of naive people would advise, they won't be there when she starts poking her hands into your eyes. I wish i can talk to you by phone... 4 Likes |
Re: My New Wife Hates My Family Without Provocation by farydah: 4:09am On Sep 14, 2017 |
amliftedhigher:this is a matter of communication and territory. inform and involve her in your plans especially when it comes to your sisters so she won't feel left out. then understand that you guys are about to start a new home and she will be the matriarch and if she doesn't 'secure' her place now...... finally, sit her down, tell her how u feel, be open to her about how ur family feels about her and ask her about her expectations ,feelings and fears. good luck |
Re: My New Wife Hates My Family Without Provocation by josessybj: 4:10am On Sep 14, 2017 |
Please run for ur life now? 1 Like |
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