Is good now at least someone need to be there for her

If your sister was a subject of a violent marriage u won’t be asking this, does it mean a divorcee isn’t capable of loving or being loved? She may be better than the single girls who think life is abt Fun..... I see nothing wrong

cococandy:
That’s a lot of responsibility for him to assume. Let him not get carried away by new love and get committed into responsibilities that will weigh heavily on him later.

That’s being said , if he has thoroughly searched his heart and he believes he’s doing this for the right reason (not infatuation) and that he can actually do it when it starts getting tough, then I can point out a few positives that I already see in the woman.

1)She’s brave to walk away from an abusive marriage with three kids. If she lives in Nigeria, she’s a really strong mama. That’s the kind of strong woman you want as an ally. On your side not against you.

2) she’s not desperate to hook up. some women because of societal pressures and mockery often latch onto the next guy that proposes marriage even if it means giving up their kids maybe to grand parents or relatives. This woman wants her kids with her or no marriage. Give her one bottle jimmy choo .

Nice write up bu t i disagree

The man should not try it
It will back fire
Is he blind?
After 3?
The gasket of d woman has burnt due to hot lashing
It will cause issues for him soon

onyekabe:
There is this my brother, he has never been married. But now he said he has seen a woman he wants to marry.

But the problem is that his family members are not in support of the marriage because the woman is a divorcee with 3 kids under the age of 10. The kids live with the woman.

The question is, is it wise for this man to marry this woman and take responsibility of the kids because the woman says her kids must be with her.

Be careful, evil women everywhere..for her to leave the husband because he womanizes tells she is not tolorant because it in the gene of every man to cheat and it takes a good woman to forgive if not even for anything it should be for the sake of those kids..Am not saying what the husband did was right, your brother will not make a difference..your brother will only find out after some years that he has supported her in training her children and the same way she left the husband that how she will leave your brother

The spell is strong

Why not hear from the father of those kids to know the reason why he fled? Women na baba for playing the victim card oh. Na them go offend you come still dey expect you to apologise

onyekabe:
she claims that her ex is violent and a womanizer

Story for the gods

onyekabe:
There is this my brother, he has never been married. But now he said he has seen a woman he wants to marry.

But the problem is that his family members are not in support of the marriage because the woman is a divorcee with 3 kids under the age of 10. The kids live with the woman.

The question is, is it wise for this man to marry this woman and take responsibility of the kids because the woman says her kids must be with her.

In my opinion, He should not...

onyekabe:
she claims that her ex is [bviolent/b] and a womanizer

Then your brother is not safe.

Whosoever marries a woman that is divorced commits adultery so says the Bible. Matt. 19.9

SirLakes:
Haha Your brother will go bald before age 45 with wahala
Egbon yen MA palori

my guy..make God bless you for this advice

cococandy:
That’s a lot of responsibility for him to assume. Let him not get carried away by new love and get committed into responsibilities that will weigh heavily on him later.

That’s being said , if he has thoroughly searched his heart and he believes he’s doing this for the right reason (not infatuation) and that he can actually do it when it starts getting tough, then I can point out a few positives that I already see in the woman.

1)She’s brave to walk away from an abusive marriage with three kids. If she lives in Nigeria, she’s a really strong mama. That’s the kind of strong woman you want as an ally. On your side not against you.

2) she’s not desperate to hook up. some women because of societal pressures and mockery often latch onto the next guy that proposes marriage even if it means giving up their kids maybe to grand parents or relatives. This woman wants her kids with her or no marriage. Give her one bottle jimmy choo .

Obviously coming from a feminist, can you advise your brother to marry her?

Is unwise and unrealistic

divorcee or a widow? pls come again.

In this life where there are 1,001 single women over the age of 26 [the age girls get desperate to settle] is the place one will leave all the fertile single women available and attach himself to a three child-divorcee? Some people don't want the best for themselves.

Your brother should put the woman on pause first, have one to three children of his own with another woman and only then can the two of them come together to form a mega family. Anything else means he's ready to cheat himself. I don't see the marriage lasting up to five years if he goes ahead.

onyekabe:
There is this my brother, he has never been married. But now he said he has seen a woman he wants to marry.

But the problem is that his family members are not in support of the marriage because the woman is a divorcee with 3 kids under the age of 10. The kids live with the woman.

The question is, is it wise for this man to marry this woman and take responsibility of the kids because the woman says her kids must be with her.

Has he lost his freaking mind?

How old is he? Tell him contact me...i got girls just turning 19 and 20 all over the place, never married, no kids and looking for man. He can have two or three if he wants. Tell him STOP l any further contact with that divorcee. In fact grab his phone and delete all number and reference to her right now. Divorced with three kids, no father....Wtf!

THAT IS HOW THEY LIE,DON'T BELIEVE HER LIES AT YOUR OWN PERIL

onyekabe:
she claims that her ex is violent and a womanizer

@OP let him make his decision!

onyekabe:
There is this my brother, he has never been married. But now he said he has seen a woman he wants to marry.

But the problem is that his family members are not in support of the marriage because the woman is a divorcee with 3 kids under the age of 10. The kids live with the woman.

The question is, is it wise for this man to marry this woman and take responsibility of the kids because the woman says her kids must be with her.

Try to know the real reason why she was divorce...


Before involving her please

nanauju:
Abeg oh, 3 kids that's not his is plenty responsibility. He should look well and ask questions before venturing into such

You are on point, sister.

DoTheNeedful:
African Americans don't really care about this as we do. It is not uncommon to see a man marrying a divorcee who has gotten 5 children from 4 different men. Yet you will see the man kneeling down with a ring and proposing to her. It happens the other way round too.

But here in Nigeria, it's quite different. Even a lady with a child won't find it too easy to get a man.

@op, try and analyze your emotion. I hope you have not tasted the puna because that can make an objective self-assessment difficult for you. Know why she is divorced. Are you willing to accept her children? Won't her children see you as rival? Ask many other questions.

If in the end you feel cool with the above, then go for her.

U can't compare this place to America.
First there is more unconditional love there. Secondly, a man who wants to marry a divorcee with 5 kids knows the kids are already being taken care of by the govt there since they are citizens, so no liability to incur.

will d children ever appreciate n like him? that's how my dad trained n took care of my step sister but she still feels bad our mom left her dad even after decades and doesn't really like or have much feelings for her step dad, our mom and us

milemimi93:


women always playin the victim card since 15BC.

And for the ex to leave the kids with her shows those kids do not belong to her ex.

so cos she has three kids you automatically see her as not good enough for marriage. The ex is obviously irresponsible for leaving the kids and she’s a very strong lady especially for having the mind to insist her kids must stay with her women with lesser strength will dump the kids and follow the man. Everyone deserves a second chance at happiness

What is the shock absorber level of your brother. That will determine how far he can go in this marriage, talking g ability to endure and shoulder responsibilities ahead of him. Marriage is not one year or twenty years but till death do you part.
Marriage is beyond I love you, you love me.

The guy is simply mad.

The worst thing that can happen to any man is engaging his resources,energy and time raising another man's kid irrespective of where or who they come from.The main essence of any man alive is to send his genetic sample into the future via having his own children,training them etc.

Any man who fails to do this has ultimately failed in life.Take it or leave it that's the harsh truth.

chemberlin:
Be careful, evil women everywhere..for her to leave the husband because he womanizes tells she is not tolorant because it in the gene of every man to cheat and it takes a good woman to forgive if not even for anything it should be for the sake of those kids..Am not saying what the husband did was right, your brother will not make a difference..your brother will only find out after some years that he has supported her in training her children and the same way she left the husband that how she will leave your brother

What kind of talk is this? Nobody was created to tolerate a cheating partner, I don't know what makes you men think women were created overlook infidelity. Besides, you conveniently left the part that said the divorced man was violent as well. Should she continue to endure that till she's beaten to death?

If they can work it out and make it out considering all considerables, then why not.

SIRKAY98:

Nice write up bu t i disagree

The man should not try it
It will back fire
Is he blind?
After 3?
The gasket of d woman has burnt due to hot lashing
It will cause issues for him soon

What’s a gasket? I don’t want to make assumptions about what you mean.

Get yourself a fresh girl son..

milemimi93:


women always playin the victim card since 15BC.

And for the ex to leave the kids with her shows those kids do not belong to her ex.

Dear u don't have to think like that...

You have met wrong bad women, likewise some of us have met the wrong bad guys.. The ex might not even be paying for children support, all I could say is, the said woman is a strong lady, I admire her strength for taking up those kids alone. Whatever the reason for there divorce.