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What Is The Weirdest Testimony You Heard This Year? - Religion (4) - Nairaland

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What Is The Funniest And Most Unnecessary Testimony You Have Heard In Church. / What Is The Weirdest Testimony You Have Ever Listened To In Church? / Share Your Any Funny Testimony You Have Heard (2) (3) (4)

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Re: What Is The Weirdest Testimony You Heard This Year? by Revolva(m): 1:21pm On Dec 08, 2019
This

Re: What Is The Weirdest Testimony You Heard This Year? by lokito: 1:26pm On Dec 08, 2019
WriterX:
this happened to a Friend , he is agnostic when it comes to religion and God .


He is visual artist and does painting and all that for a living so I go to see one evening and he shows me a clean new razor on his room table and ask me to guess what happened to it.

I try to guess but I know I am bad at it and then he tells this story I still find hard to believe till date.



he said three days ago he was working on an art work for a client and he had used that razor but two days later hr couldn't find it when he needed to use it .
Since he had a pack he figured he would search for it some other day and did not bother to find it again till to day.
he said after he arrived from school that day he was really tired and decided to sleep , taking off his clothes he laid till that evening due to how tired he was .

he had gotten up and just walked a few steps and stretched himself when he had the sound of something falling from his back, thinking it was an insect or so he turned to look at it .

lol and behold he finds that razor on the floor in other words that razor fell from his back in shock he said he ran to the mirror to check his back hoping to see razor cuts and all that but nothing was there not even a scratch .

"are you serious?" I asked the fella

"Richy I go lie give you for that kind thing , I slept on this razor the whole noon and it didn't injure me , I don't know how possible that is because the slightest turn I could make would warrant the sharp blade to cut through my skin ,why it didn't injure me I really don't know"


we sat there looking like idiots , my friend slept on a new blade for hours and he wasn't cut .

it's funny I know but that's weird , my guy had no shirt on talk about miracle that's a big one for the guy.

And you made us read this long, empty shii

2 Likes

Re: What Is The Weirdest Testimony You Heard This Year? by TeeFriz: 1:35pm On Dec 08, 2019
Kenneygirl:
None. I'm still hoping to share my own good testimony before the year runs out

Amen me too

1 Like

Re: What Is The Weirdest Testimony You Heard This Year? by lomprico(m): 1:44pm On Dec 08, 2019
cRobo:
That's why they are called miracle/testimony

They aren't ordinary if they were,they won't be a testimony

I just wish and pray you don't find yourself in a difficult position that you find it difficult to do basic stuff like walking or picking objects up

Then you will understand the privilege of life you enjoy

that means people getting jobs, married should not testify. abi?
Re: What Is The Weirdest Testimony You Heard This Year? by sheDD(m): 1:50pm On Dec 08, 2019
I came bbk from church now to see this

****Weirdest testimony*****
The woman that gave this testimony was deferred by the moderator although she was the first in roll. Moderator said her testimony is highll luminating
Woman; praise the Lord( in concise note)
My sin in-law received 35 bullets but none killed. The 35bullet is totalled in exclusion to the 2bullet that was removed from his body b4 taking him to the letter hospital where the 35 bullets was exhumed.
According to her, this deliverance came after her son in-law reported a dream to her in which he was shot by Fulani pple.
And they prayed over it

Guys I was jst freeze in my marrow
Re: What Is The Weirdest Testimony You Heard This Year? by cRobo: 1:51pm On Dec 08, 2019
lomprico:


that means people getting jobs, married should not testify. abi?

How do you explain getting a without applying for it

Explain how. Jobless man with no hopes of what to it suddend find a job and a dream wife in a month and get married the next months
Re: What Is The Weirdest Testimony You Heard This Year? by tmcleo2k2(m): 2:46pm On Dec 08, 2019
Please educate me sir: having access to questions before the exams (via whatever medium; dream inclusive) effectively makes one a *CHEAT*!
Are you implying that God supported your Bible study coordinator to cheat?
As a good man that he is supposed to be, I would have thought he would have refused to write that exam immediately he saw that the questions was the same.
To me, his *tale* does not qualify as a miracle.


anochuko01:

Fortunately, I don't need to prove Jack to You. That's why it's called a miracle. Man was the Bible study coordinator at Anglican students fellowship in my school. He had this dream few hours to the first of the three exams....

1 Like

Re: What Is The Weirdest Testimony You Heard This Year? by UniportAgbero: 2:56pm On Dec 08, 2019
anochuko01:

The man that gave him 68 did it intentionally. Saying no one can ever have a full score in his exam. BTW, our exam was over 70, CA was 30


So God assisted him to cheat others?
Re: What Is The Weirdest Testimony You Heard This Year? by TVSA: 3:01pm On Dec 08, 2019
grandstar:
A lawyer told me that when he was in the university, he sat for a course he knew nothing about and he was quite certain he would fail.

He said he was overjoyed when he scored 77% in it. That it was actually 2 exclamations ?? that was registered in as 77.

I did not know whether to laugh or cry
I've heard this many times, all these people steal others fake testimony to tell somewhere else.

1 Like

Re: What Is The Weirdest Testimony You Heard This Year? by anochuko01(m): 3:03pm On Dec 08, 2019
tmcleo2k2:
Please educate me sir: having access to questions before the exams (via whatever medium; dream inclusive) effectively makes one a *CHEAT*!
Are you implying that God supported your Bible study coordinator to cheat?
As a good man that he is supposed to be, I would have thought he would have refused to write that exam immediately he saw that the questions was the same.
To me, his *tale* does not qualify as a miracle.

oga, if you have a problem with it, face God and leave me alone. na today people dey get revelation?

this is somebody that would go into the villages for outreaches and evangelism when his mates were receiving lectures in class. so who are you to question the experience or what God does for him?
sam adeyemi and pastor adeboye had the same experience as students.

like i said in my original post, i am a church person and i even have more people with such stories. but what i have also discovered over time is that people who experience such end up becoming pastors. my room mate in school was also like that, he's now a pastor.

would you also call prophets cheats?

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Re: What Is The Weirdest Testimony You Heard This Year? by anochuko01(m): 3:04pm On Dec 08, 2019
anochuko01:


oga, if you have a problem with it, face God and leave me alone. na today people dey get revelation?

this is somebody that would go into the villages for outreaches and evangelism when his mates were receiving lectures in class. so who are you to question the experience or what God does for him?
sam adeyemi and pastor adeboye had the same experience as students.

like i said in my original post, i am a church person and i even have more people with such stories. but what i have also discovered over time is that people who experience such end up becoming pastors. my room mate in school was also like that, he's now a pastor.

would you also call prophets cheats?
UniportAgbero:



So God assisted him to cheat others?

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: What Is The Weirdest Testimony You Heard This Year? by 1Sharon(f): 3:05pm On Dec 08, 2019
Plead:
Lmao. Religion is a scam

Dey there may pant dey wear you.

Do you know adeboye drove a car for many miles without petrol?

1 Like 1 Share

Re: What Is The Weirdest Testimony You Heard This Year? by lomprico(m): 3:08pm On Dec 08, 2019
cRobo:


How do you explain getting a without applying for it

Explain how. Jobless man with no hopes of what to it suddend find a job and a dream wife in a month and get married the next months

did I say they did not apply for it?
Re: What Is The Weirdest Testimony You Heard This Year? by Blackpearlous(f): 3:39pm On Dec 08, 2019
Truefaith:
Sadly testimonies have replaced the study of the Bible in many places

People have forgotten that Satan does miracles, too

To this deceived people, every miraculous thing is from God!




Check this issue up with your Bible open at








www.thetruechristianfaith.com
Yes but we also acknowledge that the miraculous happen among believers
Re: What Is The Weirdest Testimony You Heard This Year? by Funkybabee(f): 3:43pm On Dec 08, 2019
Go and read Joseph Ayobabalola biography.. u go tired
Re: What Is The Weirdest Testimony You Heard This Year? by OgaBuhari: 3:47pm On Dec 08, 2019
Kenneygirl:
You're totally wrong
that is every ladies wish na since marriage is the sole priority of every women.

happy birthday btw
Re: What Is The Weirdest Testimony You Heard This Year? by WriterX(m): 3:54pm On Dec 08, 2019
lokito:


And you made us read this long, empty shii

grin
lokito:


And you made us read this long, empty shii



you had every right,chance and opportunity not to read it so if you want to be a typical Nigeria who would rather blame others for his or her mistake or misdeed then feel free alright, I owe you nothing.

1 Like

Re: What Is The Weirdest Testimony You Heard This Year? by figure007(m): 4:30pm On Dec 08, 2019
Brandstudio01:
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Anyway, I will Build a Professional Logo for your Product or Company For 2k Only. Offer valid while promo Lasts. See my info below to Chat me up.
Pay on Delivery
no place like this on lagos ibadan express way sir
Re: What Is The Weirdest Testimony You Heard This Year? by Nobody: 4:55pm On Dec 08, 2019
it happened to me this morning on the way to the church as I was pinging and driving, I left the road and crashed into the gutter!
broke my legs, broke my arms , car damaged beyond repair but nothing happened to my IPHONE , praise the Lord!!!
Re: What Is The Weirdest Testimony You Heard This Year? by Vivianagoja(m): 5:09pm On Dec 08, 2019
A brother testifying how he dreamt of another brother kissing his girlfriend on the church alter
Re: What Is The Weirdest Testimony You Heard This Year? by kingxsamz(m): 5:37pm On Dec 08, 2019
Brandstudio01:
A Man survived an Accident that Took more than 13 Lives along Lagos - Ibadan Express way


More than 13 people died and you call this a testimony? You must be sick. undecided

1 Like

Re: What Is The Weirdest Testimony You Heard This Year? by kingxsamz(m): 5:39pm On Dec 08, 2019
ijewejones:
The year isn't over yet..

But I know the weirdest testimony is on its way

While I wait to hear from other people...

Let me think of the second to the weirdest that i've heard(which is real)
https://www.nairaland.com/5566240/two-die-lagos-pipeline-explosion

The guy that got burnt BUT didn't die embarassed embarassed

How is that a testimony?
That guy's life will never remain the same till he dies, that's if he survives those burns.
Re: What Is The Weirdest Testimony You Heard This Year? by kingxsamz(m): 5:41pm On Dec 08, 2019
post=84728168:
We believe no testimony is weird, some could be kinda funny to you tho.

But you won't understand what these people making the testimony were all so happy to survive until it happen to you.

We heard the testimony of a woman that left home and forgot the food she was warming on her gas and left for work from 8am to 5pm, and got back home to still meet her house the same way she left it, apart from the smell of gas everywhere!

And we also heard about the guy that did the same thing, but was only out of the house for 45 mins but got home to meet all his properties GONE IN 45 minutes.

It can only be GOD!




Useless analogy.
The guy who lost his property, did he tell you he doesn't serve God?
Re: What Is The Weirdest Testimony You Heard This Year? by kingxsamz(m): 5:44pm On Dec 08, 2019
sammychimex:


Religion is scam but when you see babalawo you go fear am, who are you fooling

Did he tell you that he's scared of native doctors? undecided
Use your head before posting please.
Re: What Is The Weirdest Testimony You Heard This Year? by ijewejones: 5:59pm On Dec 08, 2019
kingxsamz:


How is that a testimony?
That guy's life will never remain the same till he dies, that's if he survives those burns.

You can't pronounce him dead when he's alive & breathing.

I believe his life won't be same but thanks to God that he can testify to how he survived..

You see (how) it is a testimony
Re: What Is The Weirdest Testimony You Heard This Year? by arodavoo(m): 7:13pm On Dec 08, 2019
My own testimony... I borrowed 200usd to trade indices only for me to loose the whole money, but God being faithful I went back to practice on demo until I was able to trade confidently. To the glory of God in few month have withdrawn close to 1000usd.

December is here, check my profile to learn importation from china, turkey, Malaysia USA and UK
And also importation of Hair from India, Cambodia and china
Re: What Is The Weirdest Testimony You Heard This Year? by lokito: 7:38pm On Dec 08, 2019
WriterX:


grin



you had every right,chance and opportunity not to read it so if you want to be a typical Nigeria who would rather blame others for his or her mistake or misdeed then feel free alright, I owe you nothing.

You're talking nonsense. The writeup was like Nigerian movies with a bad, awkward ending, you're speaking English there.
Re: What Is The Weirdest Testimony You Heard This Year? by kingxsamz(m): 7:52pm On Dec 08, 2019
ijewejones:


You can't pronounce him dead when he's alive & breathing.

I believe his life won't be same but thanks to God that he can testify to how he survived..

You see (how) it is a testimony

You're high.
Shouldn't God have prevented that from happening to him?
How is someone living in serious pains a testimony? undecided ...
Better off dead than to suffer in such gruesome manner.
Smfu.
Re: What Is The Weirdest Testimony You Heard This Year? by ijewejones: 8:27pm On Dec 08, 2019
kingxsamz:


You're high.
Shouldn't God have prevented that from happening to him?
How is someone living in serious pains a testimony? undecided ...
Better off dead than to suffer in such gruesome manner.
Smfu.

I'm really high bro..i don't really want to engage you on ur silly word usage towards me.

But if you have issues with what God does/doesn't,channel your anger towards HIM. I only brought out evidence to back the question asked(tackle the evidence not me)

You see you're looking for e-rant,which I'm not gonna honor.

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