Stmiceel:
As for me you overreacted. Just ask her to send the house girl back to where she collected her. You need not to use abusive words for your wife. Her mistake doesn't change her from being your wife.
Try to make her forgive you for those words you use for her.
But don't forget to do the above.

Mr holier than thou .... Rubbish takk

TonyeBarcanista:

How did you conclude that the wife ks wicked? Let us watch what we say towards people's spouses.

I am very sure that the wife acted the way did because of the discomfort she feels with a second "woman" enjoying the attention and niceties of her husband.

Honestly, I can NEVER fault her! I have seen first hand where lovely and nice househelp got pregnant for oga and he was asked to marry her as second wife - which he did!

The way you people reason would want you to smash your computer.

So because there are cases in which housemaids got pregnant for the Oga, therefore, all house helps ought to be treated with suspicion? How about individual differences? You guys would pick a one-in-a-million occurrence and use it as a yardstick for measuring future cases.

This woman in question has bad attitude and until her husband stood his grounds to correct her, she would still exhibit such bad attitude even after the housemaid had left the house.

TonyeBarcanista:

Why put the girl at risk? Buying Christmas clothes for the girl will make wify hate her and it will mark beginning of trouble in the house and for the girl.

how dd u reach this conclusion....there 're sane women o,they push for such privileges 4 there domestic staff...meanwhile what ppl sent understand is that,you May treat your company staff anyhow and get away with it,But your house help,Bateman and driver hold your life and that of your family.

FloraEC:
The heading tho
Your handle is new too, hope you're not trolling.


What she did was wrong, training a child doesn't end in feeding and education.
Was she in support of the help coming? Does she have any problem with the girl's family since they're related?
Try and buy the clothes for the girl yourself, hope she won't burn them.

Fortunately, she's already a mother to your children. For peace sake, try and take the girl back to her parents. If possible train her, buy her everything but let her be in her parents house to prevent woman beats up her help and accuses her of sleeping with her hubby

But what do I know self

You're very correct sir, let him take the girl back to her parents if they are still alive cuz the girl cannot be loved by the wife no matter how he treats this issue


The the wife is just a wicked person....
Poverty is majorly the cause of this kind of behaviour

Graxie:
Why are you engaging a minor as househelp? Why. Both you and your wife, you are horrible.

#HateSpeech

if the house kumit 2cide, you will go to jail

Once a mind has been made corrupt, it's hard to fix. If the wife is suspicious of the Help, then she should return her to her parents and not maltreat her for whatever reason.

See simple matter that want to bring crack into a fine marriage.

SEGLIZ:

see bird of same feather claiming saint.
with that your yeye advice up there, the same way you were in support of in-laws frustrating women in there matrimonial home in another thread. watching you in HD var.

This your TV can it show HD so?

TonyeBarcanista:

Bros, honestly, you are crying over nothing.

Your wife is a woman and you should understand her own position. She doesn't want her relative help to enjoy same privilege as her and her children before things get out of hand. Also, she isn't comfortable with the affection you are showing the girl. You were even wrong to quarrel her and say nasty things to her. Your good intention was spoilt by your action.

Guy, na you find trouble! Even me sef de suspect say your eye de chook for the babe as you don de reason her as second mother.

BTW we have seen relative househelp "chanced" madam in their homes or get pregnant for the oga for house.

Guy, apologise to your wife, and ask her to send the girl to her people.

Apologize kill you there!

A wife accusing her husband of sleeping with the house help is the highest level of disrespect.

cooooooks:
How many househelps in Nigeria are over 18??

Also, such an adult househelp is a fully grown woman and most wives will suspect them.

Cos men don't sleep with the underage ones abi??

They are even easier to sleep with

Walahi , una get patience with woman o. Op if na me, I don go open my car boot comot Machete, two seconds everything don burst. Na either my wife live like human being or she commot for my house go live as she like.

Wow

pocohantas:
Pay attention to how your partner treats people below them. People they feel they owe nothing. Someday it might be you in that position...

Your wife is wicked. EOD

-You didn't overreact.
-Allow her cry very well.
-Please, a child shouldn't be a maid. Get an adult than can match you both in strength and wickedness

Spot on! Especially your first paragraph.

over-reacted ? no man truth is bitter ,yes but must be said
why some women can be wicked to another woman's child still shocks

unique357

What your wife did was wrong by you handled the situation badly.

When dealing with issues like this, you should be calm and composed. You also need to be gentle.You need to reach her heart by asking questions.

Look at how Jesus handled the question "who is my neighbour?". Many Jews looked down on non Jews especially Samaritans. They felt they were higher than them because of rhe Abrahamic blessing and because they had been warned not to be unevenly yoked with non Jews or gentiles.

If Jesus had answered that even gentiles could be his neighbor, even a Samaritan, they would have held it against him. Jesus rather than answer him directly, tactfully handled it by telling him a parable, the parable of the good Samaritan. (Luke 10:29-37)

At the end of the parable, Jesus asked him who of these 3 proved to be his neighbor. The man rather than say the Samaritan, said "The who acted mercifully towards him".

Use such a system to reach her heart. Your harsh words and insults will only harden her heart and not send any message.

For instance, if you've ever suffered such discrimination when you were young, tell her about it. Ask her how you feel about people who treated you like that? Were you ever in uncles house and his wife served you eba while others ate pounded yam? I know of an adult who suffered such indignities as a child and he and the family held a bitter silent grudge against the mans wife. Their dad abandoned them mother and 5 kids. I think the last was even unborn. They at now all adults and luv in England. The mans wife tries to be nice to them now by its too late. She knew what she did was wrong. Would your wife like to be treated like that?

First apologize to her. Tell her you shouldn't have been harsh and requests her forgiveness.(Colossians 4:6).

Let her realise that no one knows tomorrow (Read Eccl 9:11-12). That is the painful truth. I lost my classmate last year. He suffered an asthma attack which killed him. As he was dying, he was wailing "My children my children!". He left 4 kids behind. He owned a house in Amuwo Odofin.

Yourwife whether she likes it is already in the black book of that teenager.Her family too will be displeased but keep a matured silence.

1Sharon:


Cos men don't sleep with the underage ones abi??
They are even easier to sleep with

wth you talking about

your wife needs koboko. I mean the other type of koboko

apologize for the hurtful words you said, man up and return the girl to her parent but continue to support on a low low. Hiring of maids should not be considered for any reason anytime soon cus it seems your wife already sees the girl as a rival and would do the same to the next girl

To me i will give u kudos for being a benevolent,what i will advice u to do is to send the girl back to her family ket ur wife be doin all the domestic work, that's number one, number two that ur wife is a lunatic, that type of person will leave were their is peace mark my word.

eflintsone:

wth you talking about

Read again

TonyeBarcanista:

How did you conclude that the wife ks wicked? Let us watch what we say towards people's spouses.

I am very sure that the wife acted the way did because of the discomfort she feels with a second "woman" enjoying the attention and niceties of her husband.

Honestly, I can NEVER fault her! I have seen first hand where lovely and nice househelp got pregnant for oga and he was asked to marry her as second wife - which he did!

You can sugar coat it all you want but if all the OP said there is true..

THE WIFE IS WICKED..

You don't get to define your character by how you relate with your equal and loved ones,but how you relate with the less privileged under your care..

The Wife is Wicked..

The next thing you hear,she will be using a hot pressing iron to design the young girl's back..

How is buying clothes for the girl, going to make the girl start sleeping with the husband?

Some women and the way they treat their house help,evil..

Unique357:
In brief, I am a male married with 2 children, my daughter is 8 and son is 5. I also have my niece 11 and a house help 15 staying with us.

On Monday I gave my wife Christmas shopping money to get foodstuffs, hers and children clothing including our house help.

Yesterday my wife went shopping, she bought clothes for herself, our children and nothing for the house help. She claimed that the girl doesn’t need any clothes for Christmas as long we feed and send her to school, the rest is her parents' duties. The girl in question is my wife's relative from the same village. This girl is so nice to our children, she is like a second mother to them despite her being just 15, I have never had any problem with her.

I was mad at her that I told her, if she cannot treat another woman's child well then she doesn’t deserve to be a mother, yes I did said some harsh words to her because of anger. She accused me of sleeping with the little girl which I told her she is mad and she couldn’t stop crying the whole night. This morning she didn’t make my breakfast and refused greeting me back.

Please house let me know if I overreacted

Most women are as wicked as your wife

Unique357:
In brief, I am a male married with 2 children, my daughter is 8 and son is 5. I also have my niece 11 and a house help 15 staying with us.

On Monday I gave my wife Christmas shopping money to get foodstuffs, hers and children clothing including our house help.

Yesterday my wife went shopping, she bought clothes for herself, our children and nothing for the house help. She claimed that the girl doesn’t need any clothes for Christmas as long we feed and send her to school, the rest is her parents' duties. The girl in question is my wife's relative from the same village. This girl is so nice to our children, she is like a second mother to them despite her being just 15, I have never had any problem with her.

I was mad at her that I told her, if she cannot treat another woman's child well then she doesn’t deserve to be a mother, yes I did said some harsh words to her because of anger. She accused me of sleeping with the little girl which I told her she is mad and she couldn’t stop crying the whole night. This morning she didn’t make my breakfast and refused greeting me back.

Please house let me know if I overreacted

send that girl away from that toxic fellow

TonyeBarcanista:

Bros, honestly, you are crying over nothing.

Your wife is a woman and you should understand her own position. She doesn't want her relative help to enjoy same privilege as her and her children before things get out of hand. Also, she isn't comfortable with the affection you are showing the girl. You were even wrong to quarrel her and say nasty things to her. Your good intention was spoilt by your action.

Guy, na you find trouble! Even me sef de suspect say your eye de chook for the babe as you don de reason her as second mother.

BTW we have seen relative househelp "chanced" madam in their homes or get pregnant for the oga for house.

Guy, apologise to your wife, and ask her to send the girl to her people.

Smh

happney65:
I cannot respect you if you dont respect the waiter"..Mohammed Ali..

Your wife is not a good woman and you should consider divorcing her sef..For looking down on a housemaid she isnt worth it..I dislike people who behave like that to people on the lower ladder

unique357 I hope you see this..

Haba..divorce her over what?

Bros, all these pieces of advice encouraging you to use your hand and buy the clothes for the house help will put fuel in the crisis oooo.
Better leave the matter and give to your Sister to buy for the little girl oooo

Sometimes I cant help but ponder why most good men end up with evil wives..this life self

Young man u have not done anything wrong, u tried to make everyone happy but unknown to u that ur wife has different intention, d best u do now is that ur wife doesn't need help anymore from d little girl, u can still assist her to enrol her to any of d sch in village and put to stop by having house help even though ur wife asked for it. cos the only judgement that comes out of women this days is Either u rape her, or u slept with their house help.

TonyeBarcanista:

Bros, honestly, you are crying over nothing.

Your wife is a woman and you should understand her own position. She doesn't want her relative help to enjoy same privilege as her and her children before things get out of hand. Also, she isn't comfortable with the affection you are showing the girl. You were even wrong to quarrel her and say nasty things to her. Your good intention was spoilt by your action.

Guy, na you find trouble! Even me sef de suspect say your eye de chook for the babe as you don de reason her as second mother.

BTW we have seen relative househelp "chanced" madam in their homes or get pregnant for the oga for house.

Guy, apologise to your wife, and ask her to send the girl to her people.

You are strangely stupid

TonyeBarcanista:

How did you conclude that the wife ks wicked? Let us watch what we say towards people's spouses.

I am very sure that the wife acted the way did because of the discomfort she feels with a second "woman" enjoying the attention and niceties of her husband.

Honestly, I can NEVER fault her! I have seen first hand where lovely and nice househelp got pregnant for oga and he was asked to marry her as second wife - which he did!

Tonye I respect you more than your views here. It shows the black man as wicked, trifle and still suffer from slave mentality.
The girl in question is not even a house girl, she is simply a distant relative of the woman, whose parent are not well to do. The girl is baby sitting for the family while in return the family is taking care of the education and upkeep of the girl. I am certain the girl is schooling is not in the same standard as the woman's children.
Because the little girl is termed "house girl" does not render her any less human. Because the girls parents are poor does not mean the little girl is forbidden from feeling the spirit of Christmas. I am sure that the woman in question is a professed holy spirt filled, tongue speaking Christian. Christmas does not forbid showing love to "house girls"

Anyone who thinks a man has ulterior motives because he shows a little love to a less fortunate girl at Christmas, by asking his wife to buying Christmas dress along with his children's, needs to have his/her morals and psychology examined.

Graxie:
Why are you engaging a minor as househelp? Why. Both you and your wife, you are horrible.

grow up child. if her parents that gave birth to her can't train her while another man can in exchange of household chores,pay her fees, feed her etc. there is nothing wrong here. the government policies you that stops minors from working, how many have they sent to school.

FloraEC:
The heading tho
Your handle is new too, hope you're not trolling.


What she did was wrong, training a child doesn't end in feeding and education.
Was she in support of the help coming? Does she have any problem with the girl's family since they're related?
Try and buy the clothes for the girl yourself, hope she won't burn them.



Fortunately, she's already a mother to your children. For peace sake, try and take the girl back to her parents. If possible train her, buy her everything but let her be in her parents house to prevent woman beats up her help and accuses her of sleeping with her hubby

But what do I know self

you can do worst than op's wife ! when a man is in control of his house everything must be in order if not the man will end up like Adam.

sit ur wife down n let her knw that if the house=help cnt be treated the same ur children r treated the she shud send the girl back to he parent

TonyeBarcanista:

Bros, honestly, you are crying over nothing.

Your wife is a woman and you should understand her own position. She doesn't want her relative help to enjoy same privilege as her and her children before things get out of hand. Also, she isn't comfortable with the affection you are showing the girl. You were even wrong to quarrel her and say nasty things to her. Your good intention was spoilt by your action.

Guy, na you find trouble! Even me sef de suspect say your eye de chook for the babe as you don de reason her as second mother.

BTW we have seen relative househelp "chanced" madam in their homes or get pregnant for the oga for house.

Guy, apologise to your wife, and ask her to send the girl to her people.

My friend you are those type that can lick ladies ass just for her not to suspect that you're not sleeping with a maid, the guy's act is what I'll always do since am pure and have absolutely nothing to do with the girl.

Let my wife try such nonsense I'll treat her Bleep up not minding what she thinks about me and the maid.

Don't condole evil acts just because of what wife, sister brother friends e.t.c may think or say.