BigJoe19:
But you know everything was caused by Eve. Adam could not reject what his wife gave him because she was made from him.
Maybe if there was no Eve the world would have been better.

What has rejecting the apple got to do with "she was made from him? " can't he open his mouth and say "no eve I don't want the apple" he collected it, ate it and loved it, did she force his hand ni? If we say na we dey control una, you'd be shouting no, never bla bla bla,

If there was no Eve Adam will be the only man on earth dude, you and I would never have been born.

This woman should not bother with asking for anything. Her respite is finding comfort in her 6 children.

pressplay411:
The invader and daddy's new flame is more or less that, a temporary flame.
If mom can endure, let her endure and take solace in taking care of her kids and maybe some charitable service too.

Exactly, the man may even realise his mistake later and apologise. The kids should rally round and encourage their mum

It sounds like she is emotionally distressed above any other thing.

I dont think letting their mum go off into total penury just for the sake of it is too good, unless they know they can give her the best without their dads help or the mother is a business-minded person who can bounce back

It would have been easy if they were both co- owners of their property/ investments.

Our women are very emotional and u don't win in the wars of life through emotional tantrums.
When he bought that land, was your name included?
Those cars, houses etc
For heaven's sake what are u doing in a union where u don't have your name alongside your husband's in all the assets that matters.

Enter marriage and use sense to survive in case of eventualities like this. No one knows tomorrow.
It's even ver paramount if u are a stay at home mother otherwise, Go out there and hustle.
As for the kids, both of u should sit down and iron how to go about it or the man should make some adjustments if he want u to stay at home.
That he takes care of u and the kids is never enough.
The odds are always against the women in a highly patriarchal society like Nigeria.

Fountainofyouth:



What has rejecting the apple got to do with "she was made from him? " can't he open his mouth and say "no eve I don't want the apple" he collected it, ate it and loved it, did she force his hand ni? If we say na we dey control una, you'd be shouting no, never bla bla bla,

If there was no Eve Adam will be the only man on earth dude, you and I would never have been born.

Though I don't believe in the tale, I am only looking at it from the Bible perspective.

manontree:


Easy dear. There are little information herein. Also a woman that allows another woman steal her man after 27yrs isnt blameless. If there are no cracks in d wall the lizard woudlnt have entered the house

Nigeria isnt ripe for the kind of divorce she is seeking

Don't you know some men are very inconsiderate and inhumane, when they get little money they feel they have arrived so the next thing is to have another wife, theyby having no regard for the one that stayed all through the hard times, no matter what she did, she did not deserve whatever he is doing to her.

Sterope:
This woman should not bother with asking for anything. Her respite is finding comfort in her 6 children.

Old tale

Logobenz:
How does a person that help build the empire not have money of her own so much so that she has to depend on marriage severance to be able to cope on her own?
You think it's by staying at home and catering for children that translatea to "help build" right?
What kind of woman will want to divorce and risk it after enduring for 27years?
Will a capitalist do that?of course not!So how come a non capitalist is claiming she HELP BUILD?
No make me vex ooo!if I talk wetin dey my mind you no go happy.
Better tell her to calm down and allow you guys enjoy your possessions,else she'll have herself to blame.

Reading your comment made me laugh so hard. So the only way a woman can help a man built his wealth is by joining him in his enterprise abi? Please don't talk what you don't know. Also, you said how can she help him build and not have her own? Is because she trusted the husband and never saw this coming. If she had saw this coming,she would have planned for it.

Do you know how many times she had to give her husband useful advice on his business?

Do you know if what the man is doing today is the idea of the woman?

If she did not give that man peace of mind, he won't be successful.

So long as she met him with nothing and he is somebody today and has something, she helped him build it.


Please tell your mother to get herself busy and occupied. Let her look for business to do and stop worrying over him.

In Nigeria it is very hard for a woman to win such case. She can also seek the advice of a good lawyer.

ZIMDRILL:


its not complicated at all if we take out corruption, she get half of what they aquired during the marriage

The problem is that most people are not educated to know their basic rights in marriage

And cultural route is biased towards women

Maybe that's why the man went for another woman. Some women are only there for what they Stand to gain. They don't care about the man, and maybe just maybe the man found out hence his decision. Wch is now threatening the woman. As you can see,, she's all about the property. May God help we men.

back2sender:


She is simply very greedy and a disgrace to womanhood with her wapt thinking.

Can you imagine thinking of what to gain from the divorce?

Is she not the one pushing for divorce, so why wanting to gain from the Man from the divorce process? Is the children not enough for her as a reward?

First off, how old are you

What do you mean by she is greedy and a disgrace? Explain yourself.

So because she is the one pushing for divorce means she should leave with nothing after 27years of marriage? Why shouldn't she gain, didn't they have it all together all these years?

And what the hell do you mean by the children been the reward? How is the children her reward? Are both of them not owner of the children? With the father having the higher percentage?

With this your shocking, irritating utterance, I have to ask again, how old are you

daprofo:


Call Barr. Maxwell
08104194694

Egregious violation of the rules of professional conduct by the NBA. Barr. Maxwell will be severely penalized for this rubbish.

Charlatan lawyer. It’s your kind that are bemirsching our noble profession.

BigJoe19:
But you know everything was caused by Eve. Adam could not reject what his wife gave him because she was made from him.
Maybe if there was no Eve the world would have been better.

It has nothing to do with the woman or the man, tbh. The thing is, humans change. With money your taste begins to change and your choices becomes bigger.

That is why an uneducated guy will train a girl in sch and she'll dump him after NYSC. A poor man will make money and start following other women. Only a select few will have the sense to place loyalty above this change in taste.

Like we saw how GEJ stood by MamaP

Fountainofyouth:



First off, how old are you

What do you mean by she is greedy and a disgrace? Explain yourself.

So because she is the one pushing for divorce means she should leave with nothing after 27years of marriage? Why shouldn't she gain, didn't they have it all together all these years?

And what the hell do you mean by the children been the reward? How is the children her reward? Are both of them not owner of the children? With the father having the higher percentage?

With this your shocking, irritating utterance, I have to ask again, how old are you

Calm down sis it's a new year

You don't wanna crease that beautiful face over others people's opinions do you?

Calm down

doggedfighter:

Very neuseating mentality.

I find it very baffling, really baffling how a woman who stayed at home taking care of children while i was building my business would after the business succeeds have the temerity to tell me she owns half
If i had hired a maid all those time, maybe she would say she is entitled to half of my business too. Its jst very funny
In any case Nigeria doesnt recognise that western mentality
Because for instance, the man could have 3 wives
So all the wives would claim half.
There is nothing like 3 wives in America.
U better advice your mum, you guys could actually lose everything.
If i have an actual employee that works with me for those years to build the business for say say 30 years, its only my responsibility to compensate him accordingly or promote him so that his position and salary will be very high.
do you know i could sack anytime jst like an ployee that started work last year
And he cant dare approach any court to say he is entiltled to half of my property.
The idea jst sounds very stupid to me.
Anyway
Your mum is jst pained cos she has a rival, ur dad should have gotten a second wife earlier not now
And you, okay you are a girl, no wonder, if it was a guy that really had a lot of influence of his father, you would jst advice your dad to be fair to his 2 wives.
And still make your mum feel like the senior wife with special privileges.
And appealing to your mum to calm down and not take things up to level of divorce.
Cos the court will see she is jst jealous and there is no real cause
You even said they did traditional marriage
I am sorry for you.
You should be playing peacemaker
Again, you may lose out on everything in the end

i normally dont give advice to people but i think you need help. everything in life is spiritual. seek for spiritual solution but never go to
a native doctor or juju. even some many churches belong to satan. any pastor that talks of money in any form is out.

doggedfighter:

Maybe women you know and come across. Don't use them as a yardstick to measure every woman. Generalization makes no sense

Same old argument while the reality is starkly different. You can keep lying to yourself if it will make you feel better.

LordKO:
The kind of mentality most people have and the absurd things one reads on a forum like this most of the time are so repulsive.

I wonder how any sane person would say that a wife who conscientiously and loyally stayed at home and caters for the family (with or without offspring) doesn't have right to claim that she "helped build wealth in particular and the family in general" with her husband, just because he majorly contributed his own quota of the family success monetarily/materially.

It's an abomination to approach marriage, a sacred union, as commercial business.

OP

Your mother is entitled to at least half part of the family assets, especially if has been a submissive wife all this while. I don't want to hastily conclude that you've a small-minded/insane man as a father.

God bless you.

cococandy:
Yes she helped him build it. If he had to stay home to raise their kids, he wouldn’t be able to achieve what he did. That’s a fact.

Her contributions are valid and equal to his. Unless he considers the money to be worth more than his children and family. She birthed and raised them for the family. That’s a significant contribution to the family.

We look down on that because it’s women who do it.
because we are raised to not respect women and their efforts.

Reason why I can never encourage a woman to listen to her husband and stay at home in the name of being submissive. Unless that’s her choice made out of her free will.

After you spend your youth working to raise and keep the home, it’s discarded as nothing and you have to be dependent and subservient. begging for what’s rightfully yours. Even enduring disrespect so that you won’t lose out.

This is most sensible post I've ever come across on Nairaland. She was fully employed as an homemaker. Nigerians do not know that there are stay at home dads in other countries and that raising kids is a job. Smh......

cococandy:


The man is the demon here. Not the “strange woman”.

He went after her and married her ignoring, humiliating and disrespecting his family. Put the blame where it belongs.

the first wife may be reason why he went for the second woman... When she decide to misbehave and push the man far from home... Put the blame where it belong

CorperKola:

I find it very baffling, really baffling how a woman who stayed at home taking care of children while i was building my business would after the business succeeds have the temerity to tell me she owns half
If i had hired a maid all those time, maybe she would say she is entitled to half of my business too. Its jst very funny

She may not own "half" outright, but she still contributed to your success, right?

The reason they say "half" is to codify her overall contribution to your development and not to suggest that she directly impacted your daily business decisions.

So comparing her to an employee in your shop is illogical since they were operating in totally different modes.

If your mother says "I am partially responsible for your success", will you disagree with her JUST because she did not physically come to your secondary school and teach you Mathematics ?

Why do people argue with backward logic on this platform

Reffone:
Please this no be joke. My parents have had a rough path for 17 years now and a marriage of 27 years.

Things seem not to work out no more and she is fed up and wants to leave cause my father is married to another woman who seems to manipulate him and has no single child. My father is well to do so she wants to know her choices, what she stands to gain or lose along the process.

Please my lawyers in the house help out.

Have you asked you mum why she isn't fixing her marriage?... ..Men dont just change,it's women that make me. change.

The moment your mother is out of his life, the new woman will shift her attention to prey on you and siblings.
Remember she has none yet. Elimination by proxy to meet your creator will set in.
Every woman who cares about her children should do everything possible to stay and protect them from Jezebel's second wife venomous destructive tendency.
Small daddy, mama Nafowa , may your souls rest with the Lord as another woman is about to quit the same way your mother left you to the avarice of a second wife.

manontree:


This marriage was contracted under the customs and from the narrative it appears there was no court wedding or marriage license

Therefore customary law applies and in most native laws of Nigeria this heavily favours the man

Assuming even they married in court, Nigeria is still skewed towards the man. He may easily throw her out and nothing happens. No court would divide a property or properties between a man and his wife unless such properties Re jointly owned in which case a court isnt even needed to determine title

If she wants a divorce by all account fine. For her peace of mind and general wellbeing. But if she is looking at the economic benefit I am sorry, she is in for a really rough ride

As simple as abc.

That was what I was trying to say.
It never favours women.
U start early to tilt things towards your angle in case of eventualities.
But we never learn.
He bought me cars, holiday trips etc. Even the children will bears his name and go back to him as soon as they become adults.
It never favours women

CorperKola:

I find it very baffling, really baffling how a woman who stayed at home taking care of children while i was building my business would after the business succeeds have the temerity to tell me she owns half
If i had hired a maid all those time, maybe she would say she is entitled to half of my business too. Its jst very funny
In any case Nigeria doesnt recognise that western mentality
Because for instance, the man could have 3 wives
So all the wives would claim half.
There is nothing like 3 wives in America.
U better advice your mum, you guys could actually lose everything.
If i have an actual employee that works with me for those years to build the business for say say 30 years, its only my responsibility to compensate him accordingly or promote him so that his position and salary will be very high.
do you know i could sack anytime jst like an ployee that started work last year
And he cant dare approach any court to say he is entiltled to half of my property.
The idea jst sounds very stupid to me.
Anyway
Your mum is jst pained cos she has a rival, ur dad should have gotten a second wife earlier not now
And you, okay you are a girl, no wonder, if it was a guy that really had a lot of influence of his father, you would jst advice your dad to be fair to his 2 wives.
And still make your mum feel like the senior wife with special privileges.
And appealing to your mum to calm down and not take things up to level of divorce.
Cos the court will see she is jst jealous and there is no real cause
You even said they did traditional marriage
I am sorry for you.
You should be playing peacemaker
Again, you may lose out on everything in the end

You find it baffling that your wife who stayed at home to take care of the kids, cook for you and made the home front livable, has the temerity to ask for half? You are a disgrace to manhood, do not ever get married and if you are, sorry for your wife, she obviously isn't worth nothing to you.

So you are comparing your wife to an employee? Her sacrifice of being a housewife is not work right? God forbid bad thing for some men these days.

Ladies, shine your eyes when you want to get married so that you won't settle for men like this one, make sure you are working before you get married, and after getting married, do not quit your job to satisfy any useless man, they will burn you when they feel like and see you as nothing, enough said.

iInjureHerYansh:
Only 2 questions...

1. Are you mommy's special adviser

2. Does mommy know you just poured out all your family trashes here on nairaland trashland to be looked at by dead men who are also striving and praying on a daily for devine restoration as well






Pukes*

Dead men! Haba, why are some of you guys behaving like this?

dawnomike:
Since you her children are grown up, she may have nothing to gain monetarily or property wise. This is Nigeria!
And why is she thinking of what what she stands to gain if she divorces ?

That's wrong. If you are not a lawyer why give legal advice??

livebyday:


Calm down sis it's a new year

You don't wanna crease that beautiful face over others people's opinions do you?

Calm down

Fountainofyouth:

Read it again

Calm down

Reffone:
Please this no be joke. My parents have had a rough path for 17 years now and a marriage of 27 years.

Things seem not to work out no more and she is fed up and wants to leave cause my father is married to another woman who seems to manipulate him and has no single child. My father is well to do so she wants to know her choices, what she stands to gain or lose along the process.

Please my lawyers in the house help out.

I don't really have much time to advice you .
Listen carefully divorce is not an option for your mum here. Let her endure play along for the sake of your two younger ones . if she leaves , sorry to use this word ( your dad might die earlier than you all thought ) the woman in question have nothing to loose except your mum and you the children. How I wish I had more time to analyse things for you .
Please I beg of you . your mum should reconsider .

midnighter:


She may not own "half" outright, but she still contributed to your success, right?

The reason they say "half" is to codify her overall contribution to your development and not to suggest that she directly impacted your daily business decisions.

Yeah
Maybe we disagree on the degree of contribution
If the time spent in the marriage is long
And she is entirely helpless finacially
Then shes entitled to some income from me or assets
To say half is jst insulting and unfair to millions of actual workers all over the world

Reffone:
Please this no be joke. My parents have had a rough path for 17 years now and a marriage of 27 years.

Things seem not to work out no more and she is fed up and wants to leave cause my father is married to another woman who seems to manipulate him and has no single child. My father is well to do so she wants to know her choices, what she stands to gain or lose along the process.

Please my lawyers in the house help out.

If she is legally married, your father might want to avoid long drawn financial battle, and just do a bezos........

dawnomike:
Since you her children are grown up, she may have nothing to gain monetarily or property wise. This is Nigeria!
And why is she thinking of what what she stands to gain if she divorces ?

Why shouldn't she think of what she stands to gain?