Most women change attitude and what I hate most in women is attitude

Before everything was scam, marriage reveals the real identity.

Braindealer:
The only and main reason why marriages dont last is notin but childishness; lack of self decipline and ignorance.

Marriage is a union of two MATTURED adults. Every other little reason you think causes faild marriages; like cheating, money, sex all fall under not being matured enough.

ONLY MATURED MINDS REMAIN IN MARRIAGE!

exactly... I agree � .. there is more to marriage than sex, money, kids etc..
Marriage requires a great commitment..and it is this commitment some ppl are runny from..
Marriage is for matured minds hoo.. Financial maturity, physical, emotional etc.. and above all the partners must be compartible..
They must have if not all, many things in common.. to keep them attracted to one another always

sighs! this meme should do

Natural441:
My fellow nairalander let us discuss the reason men lose interest in there women after few years in marriage.

2buffagain:
- They were lovers, but never friends
- had no shared interests
- No shared long term vision besides sex, swag and/or "I want to have children".
- Ignored the red flags.
- More focus on the wedding than on the life that follows (This one is huge for girls)

Very correct but there are still alot;
The wife stops Glowing, refuses to use fragrance thus smell bad, makes home to look tattered , series of corrections that are not adhered to, stop dressing well, always on stupid dresses at home rather than the bum shorts, adding Weight while losing shape because of excess eating, looking unkept in the names of motherhood.

Lack of vacations, lack of romance over time, body odours and mouth odours.
Constant unnecessary quarrels. Making the home to look tattered.

Note* this goes both ways!

Lack of respect from the woman(women who enjoy marriage see their husbands as role models and that husband will turn around to worship her) men are the most stupid sex if properly pampered.

Above all, no man that has gone out since morning and came back home with nothing would be loving, romantic or still have interest in himself let alone his wife.

Being 'broke' for long can cause it.

Disclaimer: Money isnt the main thing that keeps interest in marriage intact but true love. Where there's true love, money will find that place one way or the other.

who are we kidding?!
- if a woman looked like Tiwa before marriage and now she is a baby hippo, NO WONDER MEN GET TURNED OFF
- if a woman was all nice/loving/caring before marriage but now she is a bitter/abusive/disrespectful woman, NO WONDER MEN GET TURNED OFF
- if a woman was fun to be with before marriage, and after marriage she now thinks she doesnt have to woo her man any longer, NO WONDER MEN GET TURNED OFF
- if you guys use to go on dates/outings, have fun together, but now this woman is a 24hs/365 days a year telemundo expert, NO WONDER MEN GET TURNED OFF

He who is inside the river shouldn't complain of being cold. Before you marry look out for who you chose. May God save us!!!

Sont

The marriage starts becoming an adversarial one rather than a complementary one between the couple.

One or both parties, especially the wife, wants to always have their pound of flesh.

If there are children, no agreed understanding as to how to bring them up which causes conflict and resentment.

Before you know it, both are living separate lives under one roof and unable to share each other's secrets.

In most cases, it is little to do with how anyone's body has aged.

because real love is a scam!!!... the only real love one gets is from his MOM and God, the rest are conditional and big time scam!!!

The urge to taste something new and fresh.

Natural441:
My fellow nairalander let us discuss the reason men lose interest in there women after few years in marriage.

If you married someone who got pregnant for you without really being ready, you will get tired.

2. If you got married because of sex

3. You never really love her , you just married her out of pity or gratitude.

4. You got married because of family, societal and religious pressure.

Lastly Op please edit your post to SOME MEN not MEN. .

hmmmmm. God will see us thru

Nagging,disrespect,no peace of mind,are some of the reasons



Beautify your homes with our quality and durable furniture collections today

A couple of weeks ago, the youths in my church asked me to discuss on a topic very similar to the above: "WHY DO PEOPLE CHANGE AFTER WEDDING."

Loosing interest is not peculiar to men, women do too. You can go through what I shared with the youths. You might learn a thing or two as I have learnt from the posts above.


First, everyone of us must keep this truth in our hearts: wedding is not marriage neither is courtship marriage. Marriage is more demanding and requires more commitments and sacrifices. Our focus and prayers during courtship and while preparing for marriage should go beyond wedding.
Also, irrespective of the discouraging stories you hear about married couples as a single youth; regardless of what you are going through in your marriage presently, marriage is a beautiful institution if you surrender the control of your marriage to the Originator of the institution.
there is a gamut of reasons why love in marriage goes south. We cannot treat all but the Holy Spirit will guide us into some of the salient ones:

1. Wrong Foundation: The truth is, upbringing affects almost every aspect of our life and marriage is not an exception. Two people coming together as husband and wife will most likely have different upbringing and foundation. Many of us come from broken homes. Some witness severally how our parents turn each other to punching bags. I have heard of fathers that will tell their son to watch as he beats his mum telling the son that’s how to bring a woman into submission. Some of our mothers were very aggressive to our fathers and treated them as trash. Some people were abused by relatives, neighbours, trusted people while growing up. The list goes on and on.
Some people unfortunately bring this wrong psyche/notion/upbringing to the marriage thereby turning love to hate.

Furthermore, some foundational evil forces/covenants follow quite a lot of us to the marriage (whether you believe it or not). These forces manipulate either or both parties to do things that will affect the marriage negatively. Only Jesus can destroy such evil foundation. Ask the woman at the well in John 4:17-18. I was operating under a very terrible foundational covenant until Jesus stepped into my marriage.

2. Unfulfilled Expectation: During courtship, some people knowingly or unknowingly pretend to be who they are not. Some post unrealistic picture of who they are to their spouse. Such spouse on getting into the marriage may be disappointed and feel cheated. This can become a little fox that will destroy the vine – marriage. Hence, our youths should ensure truth and transparency while in courtship. Due diligence should also be taken in knowing who you want to spend the rest of your life with. It’s not lack of faith; after all, Jesus said we should be wise as serpent and harmless as a dove – Matthew 10:16

3. Desire To Look Into And Correct Every Wrongdoing: This is very important and can cause a lot of friction in the marriage. Some people are found of finding fault. They are like the Scribes and Pharisees of Jesus’s time who came all the way from Jerusalem not to hear the Word and be healed but to find fault – Mark 7:1-2.

Look brethren, in marriage, you must decide to be blind and deaf to some mundane things rather than making mountain out of a mole hill. The person you married has been like that for well over 20 years before you married him/her. You don’t expect such to change overnight by nagging, shouting or barking orders. Learn to overlook little mistakes for the sake of your peace of mind.

I remember a story I heard about a couple. They had a very elaborate wedding and spent millions of naira on it. After the wedding, the couple went for honeymoon in a 5-star hotel. The next day, they woke up to clean up. The wife took the toothpaste, press it from the middle and when the husband saw it, he was irritated. He told the wife that she should have pressed it from the bottom up. An argument ensured and the new wife gave the husband a dirty slap. Needless to say, that was how the marriage packed up, within 24 hours!

Learn to let go and if there is a need to correct, do it in love.

4. Failure To Run: The scripture teaches us to flee from fornication – 1 Cor 6:18. It teaches us to also flee youthful lusts 2 Timothy 2:22.
When God says: “run”, it simply means you should run. One thing that can subtly creep into marriage and destroy it is sexual immorality. It can sneak its way into your home if you have not learnt how to run. It doesn’t matter your anointing, you must watch and run at the sight of any danger signs. Many people have found themselves helplessly in infidelity not because they wanted to but because of carelessness and failure to run. Be careful of that brother/sister in the church that’s drawing unnecessarily close, that colleagues that compliments and smile at you at any given opportunity, that neighbor that is (innocently) always buying gifts for you even when it’s not your birthday.
Moreover, satan is destroying homes through social media and internet. Run from pornographic pictures and movies, they corrupt minds and give you evil suggestions that can ruin your home.

Learn to run!!!

5. Pride: [/b]Pride is one of the greatest sin. Lucifer was reduced to the devil because of pride, Adam and Eve wanted to be like God and bought sin for mankind. Pride can give birth to a lot of other evils. Pride has destroyed a lot of homes.
Pride is seeing yourself more important than anyone else. What we call egoism is actually pride. Pride makes it difficult for couples to resolve their differences. It makes you feel the other party should be the first to apologize thereby leading to malice. In my first year of marriage, my wife and I could stay for two (2) weeks or more without talking to each other. Why? I wouldn’t want to be the first to apologize even if I was wrong; after all, “I am the man”. On the other hand, my wife will not want to feel defeated, she also will not say sorry and our love was suffering.

6. [b]Taking Over The God-given Responsibility of The Other: This is one of the offshoot of pride. God has designed it that the husband should be the head/leader of the home. Many women don’t want this. They want to assume equality with man. It doesn’t matter what the so-called civilization is saying (look at the divorce rate in the civilized world), it doesn’t matter the agenda of the feminists, it CAN NEVER BE.
Any woman who want to fight for the headship of the family will never be able to enjoy her marriage. God designed it that way and nothing can change it. You might be richer, more powerful, more educated, more anointed as a woman, you must encourage/allow your husband be the head and you must submit to his leadership.
When we got married, my wife was a graduate and earning 3 times my salary. I was an ND holder. But you wouldn’t know. She wouldn’t spend money without my knowledge. I wasn’t a very good husband, yet she continued to submit. Now I am more educated, I can conveniently pay her salary with my staff’s. There is nothing I cannot do for my wife either she asked for it or not. Why? She did not challenge my authority when she had the power to.

7. Laziness: Love in many marriages have been frustrated as a result of laziness. Some men will watch while the wife run around looking for how to keep body and soul together. They will not lift a finger. Such women can become frustrated and aggressive, vice versa.
God Himself hates lazy people. He is not a lazy God and if you are His child, you cannot afford to be lazy. Quit complaining or waiting for that big break while sleeping morning till night. Get something doing to support your family.

CHEATING AND LIES ARE NOT THE REASON WHY MARRIAGES AND RELATIONSHIPS END BUT LACK OF LOVE, SEX AND MONEY

Marriage is supposed to be a union that should last until death do the both partners apart. And relationship should reach its set goals which often time happens to be marriage. But why do these unions break? There are three main reasons why these agreement within two adults doesn't reach its desired goal.

*Lack of love: This most times is the reason why marriages and relationships end.

*Lack of good sex: When this is jettison in marriage, it tends to promote infidelity and can cause a misunderstanding. Sex is very important in marriage. Constant ignoring of sexual activities in marriage has led so many marriages to break up. Sex helps to relieve stress, it creates bond, it procreates and it is the zenith of fun among married couples. So many couples has suffered as a result of poor sexual activities. So many women has failed to apply some techniques to get orgasm because they have seen sex therapy as secondary in marriage building. So many can hardly explore their wives sexually. When sexual climax is not being achieved in marriage, a sex therapist should be involved immediately. Over looking it is synonymous to over looking your union.

*Lack of money: They say "money can't buy love" yes that is true but money can keep love. Have you heard that poor people are vulnerable? Husbands have been taken away from their wives and wives have been taken away from their husbands mainly because of lack of love, sex and money.


You nailed it

Continues...

8. Failure To Let Go of Our Parents, Family and Friends: God, the One who created marriage specifically told us from the beginning: “therefore shall a man leave his father and mother and shall cleave to his wife and they shall be one flesh” – Gen 2:24.
Many people after wedding are not willing to let go of their parents, family and friends. Until you are able to “leave” them and “cleave” to your spouse, you will have problems in the marriage.
Please don’t get me wrong. I am not saying you should forget about your parents, family and friends but they must not be a competition to your spouse. You must not satisfy them at the expense of your spouse. Your spouse must be number one in your life before even your parents. That is the standard of God and that’s the way you can enjoy your marriage.

9. Friendship With Opposite Sex: After wedding, friendship with any opposite sex should be cut off. Your spouse should and must be your best friend. In fact, you should be best of friends before the wedding.

10. Keeping Secrets: The bible says in Gen 2:25 “and they were both naked, the man and his wife and were not ashamed”. God intention for marriage is that there won’t be any secrets between husband and wife. Such must be the standard for every Christian home. You should be an open book to your spouse, totally naked before him/her without being ashamed. If you have any past buried in secrecy, let your spouse be in the know. There should be nothing hidden: your phones password, atm pins, properties etc. Remember, there is nothing covered that will not come into the open.
Many homes have been eternally destroyed because of secrets later discovered.

Be an open book!

11. Lack of Communication, Compliments and Forgiveness: The absence of any of these 3 will hurt love in marriage. Let your spouse be your gist partner (men need to take note particularly). Compliment each other’s look, achievement, progress etc. Say good things about your spouse and it will boost his/her self-confidence and love for you. Learn to forgive even when the person does not deserve it. It heals you quickly and silence the devil in your home. Your willingness to let go is a stimulus for God to step in.

12. [b]Failure To Manage Additions to the Family. [/b]Everybody prays for expansion, increase and fruitfulness in the family but not everyone can manage these additions. Introduction of children if not properly managed can strain love in the family. Most women shift their attention to the children and leave their husbands frustrated. Most men leave their wives alone with the care of the children, kitchen and home and expect such wives to function 100% emotionally. It’s not going to happen!
Promotion in career, expansion in business, and increase in financial capabilities if not properly managed can also strain marital love. Couples must learn to sit down, selflessly discuss solutions to any given challenge and agree on the way forward.

13. Declining Romance: [/b]Many couples before wedding and few months after would show how romantic they are. As times goes one, either because of activities as stated above or because they have become too used to each other, romance begin to ebb till it’s completely out of the marriage. The devil can use this opportunity to introduce a third party who might seem more romantic and before you know it, such spouse may begin to gravitate toward the seemingly romantic fellow. Couples must find way to spice up their romance at all times. Take your spouse out once in a while, without the children. Buy things that will make him/her smile. Always look for opportunity to tell spouse how much you love him/her. Play with each other, become teenagers once in a while and play away. Throw pillows at each other, tickle each other etc.

Keep the fire burning!

14. [b]Love For Personal Space: There are some couples who sleep in different rooms; those who want time alone with friends, some who want time alone with their games. Ask them why, they will tell you they need their personal space. My friend, hear me and hear me well, if you need your personal space, PLEASE DON’T MARRY!
Once you marry, you loose your freedom to be alone. The reason God created Eve was because He saw that it is not good for man to be alone. You have been joined together with another person and both of you are now one. You must “cleave” to the fellow everywhere you go. Your space is her space, your money is her money, your house is her house, your car is her car, your room is her room, your phone is her phone and vice versa.

Love for personal space breed mistrust, malice and gives satan opportunity to tempt, run from it!

15. Above All, When Jesus Is Not In Your Boat: When I was young, there is a song we normally sing: when Jesus is in the family, happy happy home but when satan is in the family, troubled troubled home.
Many people ask me, why are you so happy in your marriage? My answer is: Jesus rules and reign in my home. I am faithful to my wife not because I have the ability to (I sure don’t. In my family, it is considered abnormal to be faithful to your wife) but because Jesus has given my victory of family curses, sin and self.
When I got married, I thought I loved my wife and would never hurt her but events that happened few months after the wedding showed I didn’t even know how to love my wife. It was not until I tasted the love of Christ and surrendered my life to Him that I began to know the true meaning of love. Thank God He saved my wife through my changed life. Both of us ever since leave our life to please God. Our obedience to Him has brought about joy, peace and progress to our home.
God created the institution called marriage, until you submit your life and marriage to Him, you will continue to struggle with it. Why? If Jesus is not in your home, then satan (author of pains and confusion) will reign there. There can never be a vacuum.

Which will you prefer?

Most of the wives after few years redirect their love to the children and less concern about the husbands unknowingly.

Men being always active , will seek attention somewhere and thus engaging in extra marital affairs. Instead lovers living together many marriages are just there for social purposes minus marital obligations.

But despite all these odds some people are still enjoying the marriage because they knew early that what grow marriages are trust, respect and understanding and by reading handbokks or " my pastor said"

kiddkash:
you can't possibly eat carbohydrate for the rest of your life

Dont understand

U see 3 n 4 ehnn God help us ooo

MelaninSkinGirl:
1. Lust/Infatuation disguised as Love.
2. Planning for the magnificent wedding but after the wedding they realise they have nothing in common and are not compatible.
3. Kids changes things and many parents cannot adapt to this change.
4. Both wife and husband lose their looks, the wife is able to adapt but the man is not.
5. Other factors like finances can affect the marriage.

hehe!!! who tell you that one!!

do you know how dependent couples become after years of marriage ..... forget their fight and gragra the man do oooo!

some men can't eat food prepared by another woman and gain weight, some even loose confidence once they fight their wives at home.

living with someone for years and sharing everything no be moimoi

men don't loose interest they only take their wives for granted, knowing fully well, she no dey go anywhere, na their property for life.

maybe you av been exposed to the new kangaroo marriage by naija celebs and wannabe celebs and their followers.

you can't loose interest in your spouse I can tell you that confidently ... you can only take them for granted

N. B. Exceptions to kangaroo marriage pls

Because they have made marriage that is suppose to be fun and happy,serious and competitive.
marriage is now entitlement and the very essence of love lost.
Marriage proves love and now love is entitlement in this reality.
This things are supposed to be for your happiness fundamentally, other things that comes afterward are incentives.

2buffagain:
- They were lovers, but never friends
- had no shared interests
- No shared long term vision besides sex, swag and/or "I want to have children".
- Ignored the red flags.
- More focus on the wedding than on the life that follows (This one is huge for girls)

Wow I'm learning a lot already.

It differs..... Sometimes immaturity could lead to it.
Lack of total submission from the woman.
Infidelity from the man side....
Mosty, misinterpretation and misconduct .
To say the least,if their foundation is faulty,and they were unable to manage the marital issues, surely there will be a conflict that will lead to a fight.
Marital career is not an easy career...

Greed to want to have multiple women
Lust for a strange woman
Lack of love (agape)
Lack of fear of God.

2buffagain:
- They were lovers, but never friends
- had no shared interests
- No shared long term vision besides sex, swag and/or "I want to have children".
- Ignored the red flags.
- More focus on the wedding than on the life that follows (This one is huge for girls)

More huge for men dear, cause the men code is ,men marry down .so I wonder how one can marry down and forget the long run.e.g a working class guy dating a year one student.even mett a polish banker dateing an ssce holder selling at main market.even my neighbour a well groom lawyer almost married a garri seller all in the name of I can control and mould her to what I want,so dear which is more huge hmmm

Some people are saying "fallen breast" didn't u knw dat making babies wuld eventually mak d breast to fall, even d bitch u go out to meet one day her breast will fall if its not already fallen... cut d crab joorh.

[quote author=divineuk post=89786929]Physical futures(going out of shape)
Change in character and so on...mind you no man would marry a woman with the intent of loosing interest in the future, something must have changed [/quote


And the men don't go out of shape? Spare me that balderdash. Please.

The reason is simple.

1.Money
2.more money
3.plenty plenty Money
4.enough Money.

When you have enough money and spend it on her, she will always look hot.

Men easily get bored and want new challenges.
But a discipline man will take pleasure in his wife forever more and rekindle their fire of love so he won't tire.
I'm surrounded by people who are marking years in marriage so no le le for this side

A man that likes a shapy slim lady with nice boobs.
Then after 4 years, she grows fat and shapeless.
Let's be fair, it is not going to he easy for the poor man....it will even be more torture wen the wife becomes arrogant then he begin to see fresh girls outside again...all these are enough reason for a man to lose interest in his wife after marriage.

bengasyl:

Dont understand

you have to try different foods

[quote author=Eulalia post=89885021][/quote]

How many men have u seen going out of shape

And in intimacy, a sexually attractive woman plays a bigger role than the physical attraction of a man