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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / Marriage: Before And After (61055 Views)
Do We Still Have Guys Who Can Wait Till Marriage Before Sex / 7 Most Important Secret You Need To Know About Marriage Before Saying Yes! (2) (3) (4)
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Re: Marriage: Before And After by Takotsubo: 11:48pm On May 28, 2020 |
@dyt Married 10+ It is crucial before tying the knot to sit down and actually think of what you want and be very very clinical about it. List the ones that are deal breakers for you and DO NOT compromise on them. Talk about money,is it 50/50 or is it joint account? How about chores? What does he or she think about raising children? Dirty or clean? Church or no church? Flexible or rigid roles at home? Sex everyday or once in 2 weeks? Marrying the wrong person can ruin and derail a person forever and it's important to remember that the definition of a good marriage differs from person to person depending on their needs. I strongly believe that once you miss laying the kind of foundation & communication style that suits you in the first 3 years,it will be very difficult to redress them later on I am in what people/outsiders would term an easy marriage, My family think my husband is a saint and it makes me smh BUT I will say what makes it "easy" is that we are mostly cohesive personality wise and because we ironed out our main differences between year 1&2. We were also fortunate to be free from family intrusion so we chose our own pattern free from mama and papa method . Even at that,life has still found ways to throw curve balls. Easy does not mean that you won't misbehave and or inflict pain on each other. It does not mean you won't struggle with faithfulness , bad thoughts including I hate you ones ,thunder fire you ones etc but the difference is that you have a lot in the emotional tank that acts as a buffer so when you have the devilish thoughts or when that ass is shaking in your face, or some hot dude is hitting on you, you draw from that bank and remind yourself that someone actually loves you and you don't want to destroy what you have. When this tank is full, apologies flow easily, you agree to disagree. No money? You chill and plan together. Every challenge will just feel surmountable because you know you will face it TOGETHER. No human being is perfect,no human being can fulfill your every desire. You will make so many sacrifices and accept your spouse and their inadequacies because when you balance their goodness against it,you'll still feel like you hit a jackpot. I cannot describe how incredibly satisfying it is to have a spouse that always wants to be home with you ,to have a home that exudes warmth & children that are happy. Despite my personal struggles ,once I open the door and see their faces,every sacrifice is worth it. That said,if anything happens to my marriage, I will NEVER remarry. Got kids,nice career,small cash,the rest can be on a hello & bye basis. 16 Likes 6 Shares |
Re: Marriage: Before And After by wizzprince(m): 11:51pm On May 28, 2020 |
Righteousness89:Are you married sir? |
Re: Marriage: Before And After by Angelfrost(m): 12:01am On May 29, 2020 |
liberalchick: No they don't!!!... They merely project ease to outsiders!!! Some couples are better versed at keeping their marital storms contained than others. 3 Likes |
Re: Marriage: Before And After by UjuJoan2: 6:02am On May 29, 2020 |
Gaggi: My idea of freedom is not living a life of immorality. Even though I crave being my own person, I still manage to avoid 'exploring' and defile my marriage. You on the other hand are just decieving yourself. Who knows, maybe your wife haa done some exploring of her own! ![]() 7 Likes |
Re: Marriage: Before And After by Dyt(f): 6:24am On May 29, 2020 |
Takotsubo: I laughed at thunder fire you ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Very useful piece in gold ![]() ![]() 1 Like |
Re: Marriage: Before And After by Nobody: 7:04am On May 29, 2020 |
UjuJoan2:You are so concerned about my wife. One would assume you were secretly wishing you were a wife to a real man. I can understand why you feel unfulfilled in marriage, you should have married a man like me who can bring fun into a marriage. ![]() 1 Like |
Re: Marriage: Before And After by UjuJoan2: 7:21am On May 29, 2020 |
Gaggi: Diseases you mean? I think I will pass! 2 Likes |
Re: Marriage: Before And After by Dyt(f): 7:25am On May 29, 2020 |
Gaggi: UjuJoan2: Isn't it too early/late for these? It's been going on for hours Ain't you both tired? Your spouse's ain't home or what? Pls you both should get laid ![]() ![]() ![]() |
Re: Marriage: Before And After by crackkhaus: 7:26am On May 29, 2020 |
UjuJoan2:Nothing terrible about it, just surprised. Also realized I must have missed an opportunity by not letting you know how much I was into you. Next time you feel trapped, caged, and want to act single and free...let me know so I can bring some sauce. ![]() ![]() |
Re: Marriage: Before And After by BEANSndPLANTAIN(m): 7:27am On May 29, 2020 |
Takotsubo:don't worry nothing will happen to your marriage just be honest with yourself. The thing the person that opened this thread is actually a single mother, so you all should know the angle she is coming from |
Re: Marriage: Before And After by crackkhaus: 7:29am On May 29, 2020 |
UjuJoan2:Good for you ![]() PS: The sentence was humour, you and the OP are just too sensitive and missed it. |
Re: Marriage: Before And After by UjuJoan2: 7:33am On May 29, 2020 |
Dyt: ![]() ![]() |
Re: Marriage: Before And After by UjuJoan2: 7:43am On May 29, 2020 |
crackkhaus: Why do people assume that being free means being immoral? I don't regard sexual indiscretion as freedom. If I wanted to be 'free' in that sense, marriage will not stop me. I will like to be my own person, and getting entangled with someone else kind of defeats the purpose, don't you think? Rolls eyes @ you being into me . . . Please don't let all those your female fans here lynch me. 2 Likes |
Re: Marriage: Before And After by crackkhaus: 7:45am On May 29, 2020 |
UjuJoan2: ![]() ![]() The sauce I intend to bring is not completely immoral, but okay... ![]() |
Re: Marriage: Before And After by Dyt(f): 7:45am On May 29, 2020 |
BEANSndPLANTAIN: Oh yeah You know her so well? ![]() ![]() ![]() |
Re: Marriage: Before And After by Nobody: 7:46am On May 29, 2020 |
Dyt:Silly girl jumped on my post, I couldn't let it pass being the belligerent person that I am. Like you rightly suggested,I think I'll chill out now. Time to get busy. |
Re: Marriage: Before And After by Dyt(f): 7:46am On May 29, 2020 |
crackkhaus: Hunku Se kosi larokutukutu ![]() ![]() ![]() |
Re: Marriage: Before And After by UjuJoan2: 8:00am On May 29, 2020 |
Gaggi: At least I'm retired. You are still 'working' full-time in your matrimonial home. Shame! 5 Likes |
Re: Marriage: Before And After by UjuJoan2: 8:02am On May 29, 2020 |
Gaggi: Or maybe you just don't like being called the cheat you are. 3 Likes |
Re: Marriage: Before And After by UjuJoan2: 8:19am On May 29, 2020 |
crackkhaus: Oh really? Sounds fun . . . I'll keep that in mind. ![]() |
Re: Marriage: Before And After by Nobody: 8:27am On May 29, 2020 |
UjuJoan2:Lol cheat? I was a rolling stone, the ladies couldn't keep their hands off me even when they saw the ring. Common sense and age has taught me that women are a liability so I I chilled and I'm proud of my decision. You say cheating like it's supposed to make me cry. Your likes were the ones who couldn't leave me alone even though they knew I had no love to give. I dey my own and you started quoting me, see temptation again o. |
Re: Marriage: Before And After by crackkhaus: 8:37am On May 29, 2020 |
UjuJoan2: ![]() |
Re: Marriage: Before And After by crackkhaus: 8:38am On May 29, 2020 |
Gaggi:This man... ![]() ![]() |
Re: Marriage: Before And After by BEANSndPLANTAIN(m): 8:53am On May 29, 2020 |
Dyt:You won't be the first woman to be a single mum and you won't be the last. My point is tone down the hate. There is nothing bad being a lady, picking a poor man and helping to to become better person. |
Re: Marriage: Before And After by Dyt(f): 8:58am On May 29, 2020 |
BEANSndPLANTAIN: na, i wasnt condemning you BEANSndPLANTAIN: another topic for another day as the matter no go end ooo ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() 1 Like |
Re: Marriage: Before And After by UjuJoan2: 9:16am On May 29, 2020 |
Gaggi: Bla bla blah . . . 1 Like |
Re: Marriage: Before And After by UjuJoan2: 9:17am On May 29, 2020 |
crackkhaus: Some people just like living in dream land. |
Re: Marriage: Before And After by Righteousness89(m): 9:55am On May 29, 2020 |
wizzprince: YES I am |
Re: Marriage: Before And After by Saintmary(f): 8:48pm On May 30, 2020 |
UjuJoan2:Toor |
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