Let me first tell you my kind of character. For you to make me angry, you have to repeat an offense more than 30 to 40 times. After each offence, I would only give you facial expression that will let you know that you offended me. And I would ensure you get the message.

So wife kept repeating same offence. I told her I don't like what she was doing. She said she would adjust, but kept repeating the same thing. When I got fed up, I tried to retaliate. My only retaliation is that I stopped being around in the house. I would leave the house very early in the morning and return late at night. I would go for business in another town and return 4 days later. She knows nothing stops me from coming home everyday from the other town because I have means of transportation. She flared up. Started calling relatives that I'm maltreating her. They asked her to say which ways I have been maltreating her...she said I'm avoiding our home. Relatives asked if I'm beating or starving her. She said no.

I know why it pained her very well. If she wants to go and urinate outside, I would go and drop her there. When she is through, she would call me and I would go and pick her up again.

She's a woman that's always settling fights for couples in the street. So, she never wanted it to be heard anywhere that we are quarelling in our home. She won't want anybody to come to our house to settle disputes. So this prolongs our fights always.

When she couldn't bear it again, she sent a message to me that goes like this: I INITIALLY DIDN'T WANT TO DIVORCE YOU BECAUSE OF YOUR DISABILITY AS I PITY YOU. BUT NOW, IT'S OVER. YOU HAVE TO BEAR THE CONSEQUENCES OF YOUR ACTIONS TOWARDS ME ALL THESE YEARS. WHAT DID I HAVE TO DO WITH A JUJU DIABOLIC MAN IN THE FIRST INSTANCE.

Let me disect those words in capital letters for you. I have a disability, but you can't notice it easily until you start talking to me. She said I have to bear the consequences of my actions towards her... looking back, I have done unimaginable things to make her happy. I even saved her life when she didn't want blood transfusion from unknown persons as a result of her Christian belief not to contract demons from the blood of unknown person. Fortunately, my blood group is that of a universal donor. That means I can donate blood for anybody. Note that she had never done any noteworthy thing for me apart from giving birth to our babies. About being a juju man, I will tell you how she arrived at this: somebody was about to give birth from her family side and the baby was in breech position. She asked for advice and I told her that if I take the woman to the village my uncle will give the woman a concoction to reverse it. Her faith is against it, but because someone from her side just gave birth through CS, which almost led to the death of mother and baby, she asked me to take the woman to the village. The breech position was reversed. I'm surprised she now labelled me a juju man.

Instead of me to take her message personal, I urged her to please herself. This infuriated her the more. Instead of leaving me, she invited someone to intervene, tracked me to the second town, and it was settled there.

My problem now is that those words are still ringing in my head... someone I thought was a lover said she married me out of piety.

Don't die of depression, you deserve to be happy no matter the disability, you know what is best for you. I don't like divorce. Let her parents know what is going on.

Not nice, those were some strong words she used and a said word can't be unsaid. However, been that you said you both already made peace try and forget what she said. I pray she doesn't repeat what she said but should she do such you can then take a firm decision.

Aswear she didn’t mean those words . Women and their mouth like tap water. She just want to hurt you with words and let you feel miserable. Show her this text and tell her you won’t delete that message that it reminds you who she really is and watch how she will cry uncontrollably. Bruh abeg no vex

I think you allowed your wife to see you finish

How can you be escorting her to go and pee and also escort her back when she's done peeing
Which kind love be that one

As regards the things she said to you via SMS and verbal exchange. All I can say is that you have a snake over your roof.

Juju man...calm down.

Women mouth sharp pass razor.

Let it go ok

abimbola74:

Aswear she didn’t mean those words . Women and their mouth like tap water. She just want to hurt you with words and let you feel miserable. [s]Show her this text and tell her you won’t delete that message that it reminds you who she really is and watch how she will cry uncontrollably.[/s] Bruh abeg no vex

Don't do such, Op even if you want to get back at her but not this way. It seem your wife have seen you alot don't add this to it. In between Op seem your wife is JW

candyguyofficia:


Don't do such, Op even if you want to get back at her but not this way. It seem your wife have seen you alot don't add this to it. In between Op seem your wife is JW

Not JW. CAC of a thing.

Stop holding on to those words. She said them out of anger and didn't really mean them otherwise she would have made good her threat and not bothered settling with you. Holding on to those words will only keep putting a strain on your marriage and reduce your love for her.

She still loves you. Just forgive and forget.

Oblongata:
Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned!

Your wife loves you, it is natural for a woman to react that way if you torture her. ( by not staying at home is a huge torture to most women). Be rest assured that she does not mean it!

My brother you took it too far!

That aside...

Work on your self esteem first, build your confidence.

It is not what your wife said to you that is really painful to you but it is how you have perceived yourself and allowed words to pierce through you... Believe me you can be stronger than that.

Lastly please forgive your wife! The tongue and the teeth are so close, even so the teeth still bites the tongue once in a while, what can the tongue do? Runaway?

Grab your wife and make sweet love to her in forgiveness, these things happen.

There is a general cliche we need to revise, " forgive and forget", people can forgive ( not going for retaliation) but people hardly forget, no matter how we want to twist it, those words by his wife are strong and can break a man's spirit,

let me tell you, her outburst was not instinctively done rather it was cumulative, you cant call your lover handicapped and tell me it was just because you were lost in the heat of the moment, the mere fact she still see her husband as an handicap means the thought has registered on her sub conscious mind for long.

I am not an advocate of broken home but from now on, Op should have a firm grip on his house, being romantic is cool but "see finish " is bad, do not do something you can't replicate everyday for a woman because women do not remember what you have done the previous day,
for you to be warning her severally over a particular thing shows your grip on her is non existent, get a good grip on her!!!

About the text I know it hurts, it is a big betrayal on her part but just see her as another mortal that is fallible, just be careful with some things with her especially extremely sensitive stuffs.

Omihanifa:
I think you allowed your wife to see you finish

How can you be escorting her to go and pee and also escort her back when she's done peeing
Which kind love be that one

As regards the things she said to you via SMS and verbal exchange. All I can say is that you have a snake over your roof.

OP

Many have given great suggestions here, I wish you were like me as regards words, but variety brings beauty.

So what I have is to fault you in absconding, when a woman repeats an offense, there is the likelihood that she is feeling she is not really loved by you. When was the last time you did something that she considers an affection of love from you?

You see relationship is about the other person not you, equally you watch what you get in return.

I fault you bkos, you should spare head the direction the house takes and not abscond, equally learn to speak up quickly, showing facial expression is never enough, kill the issue there and then let her know that that should not be repeated.

Go home with a gift, talk to your wife, iron things out, let her know what you want and how like it done and hear her own side to and both of you should commit to doing it for the other, then make sweet love. My brother nothing is as bad as it seems, every marriage problem get solution. Cheers

You just got disrespected. It will happen again unless you man up and state your new terms. GRAB THEM BY THE PUSSY

Olunmercy56:
Don't die of depression, you deserve to be happy no matter the disability, you know what is best for you. I don't like divorce. Let her parents know what is going on.

You're a honorable woman! Keep it up

If u really want a happy home nd u love ur sanity...biko u need to forgive ur wife and let go of those words from ur head.


U do pass urself too....u wan punish woman, u no eat her food or sleep for house omo na bicycle wahala u dey find be dat, e no hard to start

1. She sent you a really disrespectful text.
2. In her text she says "Its over". When someone is done they will not bother to announce it. Apparently she isnt done.
3. She was upset when she did not get a reaction from you. I think she still likes you.
4. I am very concerned if the only thing your spouse has done in all the years of marriage is pumping out kids. She doesn't even keep the family well fed and the home clean? She leaves the kids to go their own way once she delivers them? You have to breastfeed your kids yourself?! Strange
5. Does she continuously refer to your disability? If yes, she pities you: no love. If no, it was a one time act of foolishness.
6. Please place your boundaries. She should leave if this is about pity and if it is not she should never refer to your disability again.
7. There are 5 love languages. If you do 150% of four and it is not your spouse's love language it means nothing...so check if the unimaginable things you did for her happiness actually resonate with her.
8. Do not abscond from your own home anymore.
9. Saving your spouse's life is not spectacular - it is expected. Five pints of my blood is in my spouse's body right now. Its not a big deal

Those are strong words and she meant every bit of it bro.

One can only find out a bit of woman's inner mind when she is badly provoked.

You guys have resolved your issues so I advise you keep it that way at least for the sake of peace in your home.

Forgive her but don't forget those words, they are really strong. Do I insinuate that you to act on them, no I don't but be on your guard incase of any eventuality.

She just dey run her mouth

Prov25:24

Better to live in the corner of a rooftop than share a house with a quarrelsome wife.

Strong words i must confess,i might forgive but i won't forget.Since you both have settled it,no wahala.To the ladies saying she didn't mean it,i hope you would do same when the table gets turned.

CrescentMoon:


When she couldn't bear it again, she sent a message to me that goes like this: I INITIALLY DIDN'T WANT TO DIVORCE YOU BECAUSE OF YOUR DISABILITY AS I PITY YOU. BUT NOW, IT'S OVER. YOU HAVE TO BEAR THE CONSEQUENCES OF YOUR ACTIONS TOWARDS ME ALL THESE YEARS. WHAT DID I HAVE TO DO WITH A JUJU DIABOLIC MAN IN THE FIRST INSTANCE.

You know why she is angry with you?
It is because her manipulative tendencies towards you are falling since you know how to handle the situations.

What to do:
Forgive her concerning those words but keep making sure she can't emotionally manipulate you.

candyguyofficia:


Don't do such, Op even if you want to get back at her but not this way. It seem your wife have seen you alot don't add this to it. In between Op seem your wife is JW

I was just saying . Sorry I didn’t put “IF he show her “

Guess she married u out of pity or she didn't see her spec. Talk to her about it and how you feel

abimbola74:

Aswear she didn’t mean those words . Women and their mouth like tap water. She just want to hurt you with words and let you feel miserable. Show her this text and tell her you won’t delete that message that it reminds you who she really is and watch how she will cry uncontrollably. Bruh abeg no vex

confirm.women and their mouth sha.my woman is like that but after talking trash,she wil stil come and beg that I should forgive her.for real some of them dont mean it.only cho cho cho cho

Omihanifa:
I think you allowed your wife to see you finish

How can you be escorting her to go and pee and also escort her back when she's done peeing
Which kind love be that one

As regards the things she said to you via SMS and verbal exchange. All I can say is that you have a snake over your roof.

wil u keep quite?

GayPontiff:
Juju man...calm down.

Women mouth sharp pass razor.

Let it go ok

lolz
respect urself

CalliDora1:
Stop holding on to those words. She said them out of anger and didn't really mean them otherwise she would have made good her threat and not bothered settling with you. Holding on to those words will only keep putting a strain on your marriage and reduce your love for her.

She still loves you. Just forgive and forget.

sense no go kill u abeg

Just divorce her. She is not worth it.

Eeyah, e Dey hurt ooo. No way you go dey reason wetin she said to you anytime any day but please just forgive her.

Oblongata:
Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned!

Your wife loves you, it is natural for a woman to react that way if you torture her. ( by not staying at home is a huge torture to most women). Be rest assured that she does not mean it!

My brother you took it too far!

That aside...

Work on your self esteem first, build your confidence.

It is not what your wife said to you that is really painful to you but it is how you have perceived yourself and allowed words to pierce through you... Believe me you can be stronger than that.

Lastly please forgive your wife! The tongue and the teeth are so close, even so the teeth still bites the tongue once in a while, what can the tongue do? Runaway?

Grab your wife and make sweet love to her in forgiveness, these things happen.

Please let's stop confusing hateful toxic nonsense with love in this country! Wtf! Just imagine the hateful message and you talking BS about love. Mtcheeeew.

Abeg me don't want this kinda stupid love abeg.

oshonwambada:
confirm.women and their mouth sha.my woman is like that but after talking trash,she wil stil come and beg that I should forgive her.for real some of them dont mean it.only cho cho cho cho

If she truly loves you, she'll treat u like egg.