I am angry right now,
My brother’s wife is so full of pain, whenever she sight me.
I don’t know where this hatred is coming from, today she did worst than before.
a male friend visited, and I went to the kitchen to cook and serve him.

After my friend left she started ranting, and I shouted back at her.

She packed out my belongings , and she started throwing my bags and other stuffs outside.
She locked the house entrance and left with the keys

I decided to stay calm and wait for my brother to come back.

Because everything my brother own, we both struggled for it.

Everything is your brother's own and both you of worked for it? How?
My friend allow your brother's wife to enjoy her marriage, which right do you have to go and open a married woman's pot to serve not even yourself but a friend? You owe her an apology.

All these home breakers quoting me, that he cooked the food by himself. In whose kitchen and with whose authority? Most problems in marriage is from husband's parents and relations mostly if the man is the family ATM. Marrying a family breadwinner makes one an automatic Bad Wife in the hearts of the husband's family.

Unfortunately she does and can equally shoot you for trespassing

cricifixo:
Unfortunately she does and can equally shoot you for trespassing

You are very funny

Where are you from?

If your brothers wife could shoot you, I’m sorry to say this ....

Your brother is an A$$

There should be boundaries every where, I feel it’s wrong to go into her kitchen

But she doesn’t have any right to throw his things outside... that decision is for the brother



I HOPE I MADE SENSE

cricifixo:
Unfortunately she does and can equally shoot you for trespassing

Alright

cricifixo:
Unfortunately she does and can equally shoot you for trespassing

Stop being nice! Unfortunately she has already.

Op, don't forget to come tell us what your brother says when he gets back.

In this Buhari regime, nobody gets right again. Even your brother's wife have no right to send you out.



Buhari, a good man with evil intentions

If that is what you did, i don't see anything you did nothing wrong unless they are still struggling. You can't force her out of your brother's house, he knew her wella before they got married. I'll just advise you to just keep calm, it's a matter of time. Karma is a bastard, if she behaves bad knowingly to his husband's family, she will surely reap it, it's not a curse. Just ignore her.

Are you make or female ?

If you are female, it is so wrong of you to serve a make friend without permission and if you are a male, it is still wrong but not as wrong as the previous.

A cultured woman who respects her husband would not react the way she did packing your belongings and locking the door. She has no regard for her husband even if she is paying the rent, she does not need to act that way.

For you as a person, learn to respect boundaries. Even if your brother owes all his wealth to you, you must not be flaunting that to third parties.

Let's hear how your brother reacted when he found out about this.

Well....

Why can't u stay in your own house

Bros its her house as long as she is legally married.
As for me o, i respect myself & also respect people's space. I strongly advice d op to do the same

Mokason288:

You are very funny

Where are you from?

If your brothers wife could shoot you, I’m sorry to say this ....

Your brother is an A$$

There should be boundaries every where, I feel it’s wrong to go into her kitchen

But she doesn’t have any right to throw his things outside... that decision is for the brother

cricifixo:
Bros its her house as long as she is legally married.
As for me o, i respect myself & also respect people's space. I strongly advice d op to do the same

Where are you from?

I will understand your point better

Once I know you’re Yoruba

iamGholdaniel:
I am angry right now,
My brother’s wife is so full of pain, whenever she sight me.
I don’t know where this hatred is coming from, today she did worst than before.
a male friend visited, and I went to the kitchen to serve him.
After my friend left she started ranting, and I shouted back at her.

She packed out my belongings , and she started throwing my bags and other stuffs outside.
She locked the house entrance and left with the keys

I decided to stay calm and wait for my brother to come back.

Because everything my brother own, we both struggled for it.

Don't ruin your brother's marriage! Period!

you can't fight your brothers wife, it's just like fighting the government. Even though you're correct, you might not/never win.

when your brother comes back, what do you expect him to do. . tell his wife to apologise??

iamGholdaniel:

Because everything my brother own, we both struggled for it.

Then try and get your own place.
This life no hard bros. Avoid what can be avoided.

Must everything end in a fight? Ask your brother to settle you so you can start your life if truly you both worked to achieve his presumed success. Before he got married he was your brother only but now he's her husband first then your mothers son next before being your brother. Life is not so difficult to understand my dear, besides if not for how bad our economy is are two adults supposed to fight because one person cooked for his/her guest? That's if what you said is truly the real bone of contention o.

I'm so sorry that she throw your belongings out of the house of which I know it's not good. Secondly,you did not behave well by going to her pot without her concent. Let me tell you this and every other person reading thread, there are two things that women don't tolerate.

(1) Going to her pot without her concent.

(2) Interfering in the matter that concerns her and her husband.
You will be a good brother in-law or sister in-law.

The answer can be yes or no, subject to the circumstances surrounding your relationship with her from the inception:

- Yes, if you'd been a thorn in her flesh.

- No, if you've always been fair to her.

The both of you know the truth and who's at fault.

Regardless of who's at fault, always be polite to her, at least until she proved that she doesn't deserve to be treated like a sane person because, if not for anything else, she's your brother's wife.

Of course, she does.

This country is really getting harder by the day,alot of people are angry and frustrated.

When people fight because of food it breaks my heart because it just shows the level of poverty and poverty mentality that abounds in this country.

@OP no vex,if it is possible try and resolve issues with her even before your brother comes back. Women can sometimes be intoxicated with power. Be a man and resolve the issues at hand then work hard to have your own space.

The kind of things that trip some women sef
Kitchen food ? When okonjo iweala just broke new record.

Sighs.....Since you said you were involved in the acquisition of everything your brother owns as you both struggled for it, then it is an indication you can earn.......go rent your own space though still wondering how one who is still an undergraduate of Ebonyi State University was involved in acquiring all that is older married brother owns.

A married brother's house is NOT a family house where siblings and cousins can cruise in and out. It is the home of his wife and their children, so any other person staying there is a guest and must respect boundaries.

We see many justifying that they "suffered" with their brother while growing up. The question would be, was the woman not also growing up with her own siblings? Since a man cannot marry his sister because she was in the picture when he had "nothing", so nah calming down things.

Op it is very wrong of you to go into the kitchen of your brother's wife. Don't put your brother in the middle because he will definitely choose his wife over you. Respect yourself and tolerate more

iamGholdaniel:
I am angry right now,
My brother’s wife is so full of pain, whenever she sight me.
I don’t know where this hatred is coming from, today she did worst than before.
a male friend visited, and I went to the kitchen to cook and serve him.

After my friend left she started ranting, and I shouted back at her.

She packed out my belongings , and she started throwing my bags and other stuffs outside.
She locked the house entrance and left with the keys

I decided to stay calm and wait for my brother to come back.

Because everything my brother own, we both struggled for it.

two of una just get hot temper.

you d vex, she d vex. you no suppose touch that pot without her permission if you feel she don't like it. on the other hand, she no suppose throw you out. who raised her as such? not cool!

Mindlog:
Sighs.....Since you said you were involved in the acquisition of everything your brother owns as you both struggled for it, then it is an indication you can earn.......go rent your own space.

As simple as ABC

By the way OP they need privacy, I hope you know?

Just give her smackdown and take ur bags inside b4 rain beat them. Men should learn 2 marry character not fig8

Yusufisraelj:


As simple as ABC

By the way OP they need privacy, I hope you know?

The wife did wrong throwing his things out, should have waited for the husband to come home.

Sadly, a good number of Nigerians were socialized into seeing nothing wrong in breaching the privacy a married couple should enjoy. There is nothing wrong in hosting a third party but with an adult going on to live for months on end with the couple tend to generate conflicts.

Your brother's wife is wrong in throwing you out. Even tho you trespassed, it still doesn't warrant such treatment. Her hatred for you is on another level.

Allow them to enjoy their marriage.

Many people don't know what marriage means.

You are currently an extended relative to your brother.

Your brother's immediate family is his WIFE and CHILDREN. It's called NUCLEAR family

Only people who are possessed with the spirit of witchcraft and afflicted with poverty mentality, will see anything wrong when a woman's BIL goes into the kitchen to cook something for his guest/friend. I said what I said...


In this decade when women are taking charge of industries and big businesses, some are still forming alpha & omega of kitchen matters.

Mindlog:


The wife did wrong throwing his things out, should have waited for the husband to come home.

Sadly, a good number of Nigerians were socialized into seeing nothing wrong in breaching the privacy a couple should enjoy. There is nothing wrong in hosting a third party but with an adult going on to live for months on end with the couple tend to generate conflicts.

For her to throw his things out, OP must have been causing wahala for the woman in the house. It's easy for him to paint her bad but no one knows what she has been enduring. It's obvious from his words "because everything my brother own, we both struggled for it" he has entitlement mentality in the house, isn't allowing her to enjoy her home or marriage in peace because he thinks he should be living there, and who knows what he has been saying to her. In this part of the word, if the law gets involved in such situation OP would be in the wrong.

So much missing from your story but even with the small details you’ve provided I’m seeing problems lol why are you in their matrimonial home abeg

Nwodosis:
Everything is your brother's own and both you worked for it? How?
My friend allow your brother's wife to enjoy her marriage, which right do you have to go and open a married woman's pot to serve not even yourself but a friend? You owe her an apology.

You obviously didn't read the part where she cooked and served. Note that she didn't just dish food cooked by the sister in law.
Most girls can't seem to tolerate having their husbands sibling around. Meanwhile, it's this same people that probably built him up to be the man he has become.

I have come to understand that the type of women who don't want their inlaws around are usually the leeching types. They are the ones who have turned their marriages into a full time poverty alleviation program, and anything or anyone that looks like a threat to their steady cash out is an enemy, or a home breaker as they prefer to call it. You don't need to do them any special wrongs to earn their wrath.

And let's be clear, it has nothing to do with privacy, otherwise these same people won't bring their own siblings and moms to live in their husbands house...so much for privacy. It's not privacy they're after, it's a complete takeover.

Calling your inlaws home breakers just because you can't bear to:
- See them around or in your home
- See them happy or laughing with your husband without your heart going to pieces because you think they're stealing his affections from you
- See your husband supporting them
- Think that he has an obligation and duty to certain people in his life

All the above are obvious signs that you're a selfish and evil-minded person.

Op. Just find a way to leave that house okay. Don't waste your time trying to fight or anything. Just move on and hopefully lines will fall in pleasant places for you soon.

Mindlog:


The wife did wrong throwing his things out, should have waited for the husband to come home.

Sadly, a good number of Nigerians were socialized into seeing nothing wrong in breaching the privacy a couple should enjoy. There is nothing wrong in hosting a third party but with an adult going on to live for months on end with the couple tend to generate conflicts.

Couldn't agree less.