Union, OPU, has called on President Muhammadu Buhari to bal­ance political appointments in the interest of peace and unity of Nigeria, just as it also pleaded with him to en­sure the implementation of the report of the National Conference.

Rising from its Europe summit, held in Amster­dam, Holland, OPU said the only way to move Nigeria as a country forward, based on the structural imbalances that affect progress and which bring suspicion and lack of trust among various ethnic groups, is the full implementation of the na­tional conference report.

In a statement made available to National Mir­ror and signed by its Europe coordinator, General Secre­tary and deputy coordina­tor, Akogun Banji Ojo, Mr. Sanni Olajide and Chief Victor Adewale respective­ly, OPU said for Nigeria to move forward, there must be true federalism.

It also called on the Fed­eral Government to expedite actions and facilitate the res­cue of more than 200 girls that were kidnapped by the dreaded Boko Haram sect and who have spent more than 500 days in their custody.

It also advised the Feder­al Government to lay more emphasis on security of lives and properties of the citizens and foreign nation­als living in Nigeria, saying the recent report that over 20 states are not safe to travel to by the United States, Britain and some European Union countries is not good for the image of the tourism sector of the country, especially when many countries are looking beyond mineral re­sources to tourism as source of income.

really.

The wise couple will understand that there are common stages in a marriage. Many marriages fail because of ignorance. People enter marriage but do not know how to succeed in it for life. Many believe that the emotion of romantic love will carry them through life. They do not realize that difficult times come to any marriage. After only a few weeks of marriage, some people say, "He (or she) has changed; this is not the person I married. I have no idea what went wrong!" Most of the time this occurs because people who were marrying did not really know each other. They did not want to see faults in each other, or they did not count the cost. Before marriage, people learn to please themselves or their families. But when two people marry, they must learn to please each other. The Bible tells us to "Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ" (Eph. 5:21). Many times, married people refuse to learn to submit to each other. But a husband and wife should become closer through the three stages of growth in marriage.
Stage One: Get to know your spouse.

Often a new marriage is full of energy, innocence, and surprises. The early months of marriage are a time to learn about each other. Five sentences describe a couple during this first stage of marriage:

They are attracted to each other. Their attention is focused on each other. The couple spends much time thinking about each other. They forget other things and walk around smiling about the one they have married.
They see only the best in each other. In the first stage of marriage, people tend to think of their partner on a high level. Solomon wrote: "How beautiful you are, my darling! Oh, how beautiful! Your eyes behind your veil are doves" (Song of Songs 4:1). During these early days, married partners praise and admire each other. Each is perfect in the other's eyes.
They submit to each other. At first, new couples give in to each other and give up their rights. They submit to each other to have harmony. They are tender with each other and like to be together. They care about each other's needs.
They enjoy each other. Early in marriage the partners are very happy. They have a feeling of well-being. Everything seems great and they are encouraged. Solomon writes from this point of view throughout the Song of Songs. He feels all the emotion of Stage One: joy, happiness, and excitement. But there is one more sentence that describes this stage.
They ignore the faults of each other. The fact is, at the beginning of a marriage, you really do not know the other person. You are in love with an ideal of him or her. You do not know what your spouse is really like, and you do not know your future. In those early months, couples tend to ignore differences and overlook faults. They put odd things aside. Often, zthey ignore major problems.

This first stage of marriage does not last, because it cannot last. Sooner or later, couples become aware of differences and faults. They have different personalities, different *temperaments, and different responsibilities. The *honeymoon (first period of enthusiasm) will end, and they must go back to work. When this stage passes, we come to Stage Two.
Stage Two: Understanding and growing through differences.

The man who wrote Song of Songs also wrote Proverbs 27. In Song of Songs, Solomon was saying, "You are perfect! You are flawless. There is nothing wrong with you. Marriage is great! I am in love!" After a time, Solomon says this about his wife: "A quarrelsome wife is like a constant dripping on a rainy day; restraining her is like restraining the wind or grasping oil with the hand" (Prov. 27:15-16).

What happened? It sounds like his joy in marriage and his joy about his wife disappeared. During this stage, delight can turn to confusion, bitterness, and tension. Here are five descriptions about what can happen to the husband and wife in Stage Two.

They become dull. Routine and boredom become part of the couple's life. Most excitement is gone. There is some loss of interest and some change in feelings. People do not care much about the way they look, because they cannot look perfect all the time. The honeymoon (first stage) is over, and now the partners begin to realize that marriage is like life; some days are wonderful, but many are slow, dull, routine, or even boring.
They argue. The couple begins to quarrel over their differences. They no longer give up and give in. Strife enters the marriage.
They defend themselves. The partners start protecting themselves. They are not as open and trusting as they were. They do not want the other to accuse them of their faults. They start protecting themselves. They excuse themselves and accuse their mate. Resentment and bitterness can build up. They can become defensive and unwilling to admit faults or to mature.
They criticize each other. In the first stage, husbands, like Solomon, say, "Everything she does is right!" And "She is perfect!" Now, very little seems right. What a change in attitude. The wife says, "I do not respect him anymore." Respect moves out and criticism moves in.
They become disappointed. The couple's dreams are not coming true. Sometimes people have said, "I feel trapped, like Others have said, "I am not happy, and I know God wants me happy, so I should not get a divorce. Some make the mistake of trying to find feelings of love with another person. This unfaithfulness often destroys their marriage. Others become stuck in this stage of discouragement. They do not make the effort to work through this stage and understand their spouse. Because of these five reactions, many never know how wonderful marriage can be. They do not cross over the valley of disappointment to the mountain of mature love.

Stage Three: Mature love.

Stage Three is described in 1 Corinthians 13, the "Love Chapter." "Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails (1 Cor. 13:4-.

In Stage Three, we see mature love. This is not just romantic feelings. Mature love is a decision to do the right thing, say the right thing, and be the right person. Let us look at seven characteristics of mature love.

1. Mature love is tender. Every marriage needs tenderness. We must be gentle and not judge each other. We must be careful with each other's feelings. We must be tender and avoid embarrassing our spouse. We realize that we are on the same team and we refuse to criticize or destroy each other.

2. Mature love is responsible. We each fulfill our duty to build a good marriage. We are responsible to love, provide, protect, and nurture our spouse and our children. We must love and act responsibly to God first, then our spouse, and our children. We meet the needs of our loved ones even when it means personal sacrifice.

3. Mature love is accepting. We will never be alike and that is good. God created every husband and wife unique. We know we have different personalities and temperaments, different faults, and we still find a way to accept the one we married.

As a wise man said, "Before marriage, keep both eyes open, but after marriage, close one." This means that we learn to see our spouse as he or she truly is but, we choose then to overlook certain faults. Not every fault is worth a fight! Instead, we must "Accept one another,then, just as Christ accepted you, in order to bring praise to God" (Rom. 15:7).

4. Mature love is secure. Mature love offers security that says, "No matter what happens, we will make it together." Both spouses must feel that they will remain faithful if they lose a job, lose health, or fail to reach their goals. This commitment brings security to both husband and wife. It also brings a deep sense of security to the children. The children need to know that during difficult times their parents will do whatever it takes to make the marriage succeed.

5. Mature love is truthful. Mature love is truthful. "Love … rejoices with the truth" (1 Cor. 13:6). As couples, we must be honest with each other and able to say what we feel. We must be truthful and tender to one another. The Bible calls this "speaking the truth in love" (Eph. 4:15).

The Bible instructs believers to "confess your sins to each other and pray for eachother so that you may be healed" (James 5:16). There are many couples that need their relationship to be healed because their relationship is weak. Many husbands and wives need to confess their sins (faults) to each other and pray for each other. Their relationship be healed through confession and prayer.

Married couples must be willing to reveal their thoughts by honest communication. Mature love says, "This is where I am hurting." Or, "This is what I do not like." "This is what I need. What do you need?" "What is hurting you?" We need to stop hiding our feelings and opinions and be honest with each other.

6. Mature love is humble. Some people want the marriage relationship to focus only on their needs and feelings. Some people sulk, pout, and brood. If a husband or wife refuses to talk, then their relationship will be weak. Some people threaten to walk out. Others use sarcasm and ridicule to attack loved ones. Some people like to blame their spouse. If we waste time and energy trying to find out who is at fault, we cannot fix the problem. Some people are always trying to change their partner. These actions are a form of pride and judgment and they will hurt a marriage.

In contrast, mature love is humble. Mature love puts the needs and feelings of others about everything else. Mature love learns to walk away from actions that reveal the pride of the flesh. It refuses to return negative thoughts and actions but instead chooses to act in a manner that honors Jesus Christ.

7. Mature love is willing to grow. If our marriage is mature, we have made the decision to act like adults instead of children. Mature love does not act selfishly or childish but instead chooses to act like Jesus Christ at all times. Mature love will seek to grow the marriage relationship as each spouse seeks to become a better follow of Christ, a better spouse, and a better parent.read more,>>>[url]konga/globallandmark[/url]

yes and i believe this .

There is no way to avoid conflict in your marriage. The question is: How will you deal with it?


Few couples like to admit it, but conflict is common to all marriages. We have had our share of conflict and some of our disagreements have not been pretty. We could probably write a book on what not to do!

Start with two selfish people with different backgrounds and personalities. Now add some bad habits and interesting idiosyncrasies, throw in a bunch of expectations, and then turn up the heat a little with the daily trials of life. Guess what? You are bound to have conflict. It’s unavoidable.

Since every marriage has its tensions, it isn’t a question of avoiding them but of how you deal with them. Conflict can lead to a process that develops oneness or isolation. You and your spouse must choose how you will act when conflict occurs.

Step One: Resolving conflict requires knowing, accepting, and adjusting to your differences.

One reason we have conflict in marriage is that opposites attract. Usually a task-oriented individual marries someone who is more people-oriented. People who move through life at breakneck speed seem to end up with spouses who are slower-paced. It’s strange, but that’s part of the reason why you married who you did. Your spouse added a variety, spice, and difference to your life that it didn’t have before.

But after being married for a while (sometimes a short while), the attractions become repellents. You may argue over small irritations—such as how to properly squeeze a tube of toothpaste—or over major philosophical differences in handling finances or raising children. You may find that your backgrounds and your personalities are so different that you wonder how and why God placed you together in the first place.

It’s important to understand these differences, and then to accept and adjust to them. Just as Adam accepted God’s gift of Eve, you are called to accept His gift to you. God gave you a spouse who completes you in ways you haven’t even learned yet.

We were no exception. Perhaps the biggest adjustment we faced early in our marriage grew out of our differing backgrounds. I grew up in Ozark, Missouri, a tiny town in the southwestern corner of the “Show-Me” state. Barbara grew up in a country club setting near Chicago and later in Baytown, Texas. Barbara came into our marriage a refined young lady. I was a genuine hillbilly.

It was as though we came from two different countries with totally different traditions, heritages, habits, and values. The differences became apparent early in our marriage. Take furniture, for example. Barbara had an Ethan Allen dream book and she was always looking at it. It was full of things made of solid cherry, solid walnut, solid mahogany. It was nothing for chairs to cost $189.95—per leg.

I didn’t understand why she wanted to go buy this kind of stuff when, in southwest Missouri, you could go to K-Mart and get a formica table with chrome legs and six chairs! And for a lot less than $189.95. You can eat off that kind of table for years and it will never show any wear.

So, how did we compromise? We bought an antique and I was expected to refinish it—which created an opportunity for another major difference in our backgrounds to surface. Barbara’s father was an engineer. He is mechanically gifted, can fix anything, and actually enjoys it. I’m convinced he could fix a nuclear reactor.

My dad had a background in sales. Fixing things was not his idea of fun. If bailing wire or a little duct tape wouldn’t work, he usually called the plumber or whatever repairman was necessary.

And so there we were, just married, with an antique table that needed refinishing. I went at it reluctantly, but I got it done. In some ways it saved our marriage in the early going.

Step Two: Resolving conflict requires defeating selfishness.

All of our differences are magnified in marriage because they feed what is undoubtedly the biggest source of our conflict—our selfish, sinful nature.

Maintaining harmony in marriage has been difficult since Adam and Eve. Two people beginning their marriage together and trying to go their own selfish, separate ways can never hope to experience the oneness of marriage as God intended. The prophet Isaiah portrayed the problem accurately more than 2,500 years ago when he described basic human selfishness like this: “All of us like sheep have gone astray, each of us has turned to his own way” (Isaiah 53:6). We are all self-centered; we all instinctively look out for number one, and this leads directly to conflict.

Marriage offers a tremendous opportunity to do something about selfishness. We have seen the Bible’s plan work in our lives, and we’re still seeing it work daily. We have not changed each other; God has changed both of us. The answer for ending selfishness is found in Jesus and His teachings. He showed us that instead of wanting to be first, we must be willing to be last. Instead of wanting to be served, we must serve. Instead of trying to save our lives, we must lose them. We must love our neighbors (our spouses) as much as we love ourselves. In short, if we want to defeat selfishness, we must give up, give in, and give all. As Philippians 2:1-8 tells us:

Therefore if there is any encouragement in Christ, if there is any consolation of love, if there is any fellowship of the Spirit, if any affection and compassion, make my joy complete by being of the same mind, maintaining the same love, united in spirit, intent on one purpose. Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind regard one another as more important than yourselves; do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also for the interests of others. Have this attitude in yourselves which was also in Christ Jesus, who, although He existed in the form of God, did not regard equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied Himself, taking the form of a bond-servant, and being made in the likeness of men. Being found in appearance as a man, He humbled Himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross.

To experience oneness, you must give up your will for the will of another. But to do this, you must first give up your will to Christ, and then you will find it possible to give up your will for that of your spouse.

Step Three: Resolving conflict requires pursuing the other person.

Romans 12:18 says, “If it is possible, as much as it depends on you, live peaceably with all men.” The longer I live the more I realize how difficult those words are for many couples. Living peaceably means pursuing peace. It means taking the initiative to resolve a difficult conflict rather than waiting for the other person to take the first step.

To pursue the resolution of a conflict means setting aside your own hurt, anger, and bitterness. It means not losing heart. My challenge to you is to “keep your relationships current.” In other words, resolve that you will remain in solid fellowship daily with your spouse—as well as with your children, parents, coworkers, and friends. Don’t allow Satan to gain a victory by isolating you from someone you care about.

Step Four: Resolving conflict requires loving confrontation.

Wordsworth said, “He who has a good friend needs no mirror.” Blessed is the marriage where both spouses feel the other is a good friend who will listen, understand, and work through any problem or conflict. To do this well takes loving confrontation.

Confronting your spouse with grace and tactfulness requires wisdom, patience, and humility. Here are a few other tips we’ve found useful:

Check your motivation. Will your words help or hurt? Will bringing this up cause healing, wholeness, and oneness, or further isolation?
Check your attitude. Loving confrontation says, “I care about you. I respect you and I want you to respect me. I want to know how you feel.” Don’t hop on your bulldozer and run your spouse down. Approach your spouse lovingly.
Check the circumstances. This includes timing, location, and setting. Don’t confront your spouse, for example, when he is tired from a hard day’s work, or in the middle of settling a squabble between the children. Also, never criticize, make fun of, or argue with your spouse in public.
Check to see what other pressures may be present. Be sensitive to where your spouse is coming from. What’s the context of your spouse’s life right now?
Listen to your spouse. Seek to understand his or her view, and ask questions to clarify viewpoints.
Be sure you are ready to take it as well as dish it out. You may start to give your spouse some “friendly advice” and soon learn that what you are saying is not really his problem, but yours!
During the discussion, stick to one issue at a time. Don’t bring up several. Don’t save up a series of complaints and let your spouse have them all at once.
Focus on the problem, rather than the person. For example, you need a budget and your spouse is something of a spendthrift. Work through the plans for finances and make the lack of budget the enemy, not your spouse.
Focus on behavior rather than character. This is the “you” message versus the “I” message again. You can assassinate your spouse’s character and stab him right to the heart with “you” messages like, “You’re always late—you don’t care about me at all; you don’t care about anyone but yourself.” The “I” message would say, “I feel frustrated when you don’t let me know you’ll be late. I would appreciate if you would call so we can make other plans.”
Focus on the facts rather than judging motives. If your spouse forgets to make an important call, deal with the consequences of what you both have to do next rather than say, “You’re so careless; you just do things to irritate me.”
Above all, focus on understanding your spouse rather than on who is winning or losing. When your spouse confronts you, listen carefully to what is said and what isn’t said. For example, it may be that he is upset about something that happened at work and you’re getting nothing more than the brunt of that pressure.


Step Five: Resolving conflict requires forgiveness.

No matter how hard two people try to love and please each other, they will fail. With failure comes hurt. And the only ultimate relief for hurt is the soothing salve of forgiveness.

The key to maintaining an open, intimate, and happy marriage is to ask for and grant forgiveness quickly. And the ability to do that is tied to each individual’s relationship with God.

About the process of forgiveness, Jesus said, “For if you forgive men for their transgressions, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men, then your Father will not forgive your transgressions” (Matthew 6:14–15). The instruction is clear: God insists that we are to be forgivers, and marriage—probably more than any other relationship—presents frequent opportunities to practice.

Forgiving means giving up resentment and the desire to punish. By an act of your will, you let the other person off the hook. And as a Christian you do not do this under duress, scratching and screaming in protest. Rather, you do it with a gentle spirit and love, as Paul urged: “Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you” (Ephesians 4:32).

Step Six: Resolving conflict requires returning a blessing for an insult.

First Peter 3:8-9 says, “To sum up, all of you be harmonious, sympathetic, brotherly, kindhearted, and humble in spirit; not returning evil for evil or insult for insult, but giving a blessing instead; for you were called for the very purpose that you might inherit a blessing.”

Every marriage operates on either the “Insult for Insult” or the “Blessing for Insult” relationship. Husbands and wives can become extremely proficient at trading insults—about the way he looks, the way she cooks, or the way he drives and the way she cleans house. Many couples don’t seem to know any other way to relate to each other.

What does it mean to return a blessing for an insult? Chapter three of 1 Peter goes on to say “For, ‘the one who desires life, to love and see good days, must keep his tongue from evil and his lips from speaking deceit. He must turn away from evil and do good; he must seek peace and pursue it’” (verses 10-11).

To give a blessing first means stepping aside or simply refusing to retaliate if your spouse gets angry. Changing your natural tendency to lash out, fight back, or tell your spouse off is just about as easy as changing the course of the Mississippi River. You can’t do it without God’s help, without yielding to the power of the Holy Spirit.

It also means doing good. Sometimes doing good simply takes a few words spoken gently and kindly, or perhaps a touch, a hug, or a pat on the shoulder. It might mean making a special effort to please your spouse by performing a special act of kindness.

Finally, being a blessing means seeking peace, actually pursuing it. When you eagerly seek to forgive, you are pursuing oneness, not isolation.

same too.

Name: Nelson Maluleka
Age: 16
Hometown: Mbalenhle – Mpumalanga
Nickname: Xavi – because I play like him
Position: Attacking midfield
Club: SuperSport United

How did you get into football - before choosing football as a career, did you have other choices?

I’ve loved football from school days, from very young. I used to play in tournaments and got motivated to play for big teams. I then started to go to trials and in 2011 I went to trial for SuperSport at TUT–and got selected.

Which other career path will you consider should you not become a professional footballer?

I’m currently in school in grade 11. I’d like to study law and become a judge. I’ll register for a law degree after matric.

Where do you see yourself in five years’ time?

I wish to play overseas. I feel that I’ve already achieved a lot this year. I made the Under 17 team and also become captain of the Under 17 team – which qualified for CAF next year.

How do you see the MultiChoice Diski Challenge helping you get there?

It’s beautiful what the Diski Challenge is doing for us, giving us the opportunity to show off our skills on TV. Makes people love soccer even more.

I’m gaining a lot of experience, it’s been very helpful playing with big players and an opportunity to go to Holland. Everyone is motivated to go overseas so this is the biggest opportunity.

Tell us about yourself outside football:

I love reading, I read the Bible in my spare time. I go to church regularly.

Family– Very supportive. Even though I lives far from them, we always find time to communicate.

The English Premier League produced some 23 goals in a weekend that saw three matches end in 1-1 draws while Man United’s 100 percent record came to an end. Man City had no such problems as they racked up their ninth victory in a row in top flight football, a feat they last achieved in 1912. Defending champions Chelsea battled to a 3-2 win over West Brom.
source:
Aleksandar Kolarov and Samir Nasri were on target as Manchester City beat Everton 2-0 at Goodison Park to equal their club record of nine consecutive top-flight wins. Not since 1912 had City reeled off nine victories in a row in the top tier, but Kolarov's second-half strike and substitute Nasri's fine late finish ensured they achieved that feat on Sunday to make it three wins out of three at the start of the new Barclays Premier League season.

Abe oooo.

Lionel Messi was on Thursday voted Uefa's best player in Europe for 2014-2015 with Germany's Celia Sasic winning the women's award.

The Argentina star, who won the Champions League, Spain's La Liga and Spanish Cup with Barcelona, claimed the award for the second time ahead of Cristiano Ronaldo and Luis Suarez.

"I am happy to win the award. I thank all my teammates because they deserve part of it. I depend a lot on the team like everyone else," the 28-year-old said.

Messi also won in 2010-2011 and succeeds Real Madrid rival Ronaldo who won last year.

FFC Frankfurt's Sasic, 27, was voted the best women's player ahead of France's Amandine Henry and fellow German Dzsenifer Marozsan.

Sasic, who retired last month, was the top scorer in the Champions League which Frankfurt won, the Bundesliga and at the Women's World Cup in Canada where she won the Golden Boot award.

Chelsea's new signing Papy Djilobodji has been left out of the club's Champions League squad.

Djilobodji was signed from French side Nantes on Tuesday after the Premier League champions were repeatedly turned down by Everton in their pursuit of John Stones.

The Senegal defender will wear Chelsea's number 15 shirt, but he has been omitted from the squad submitted to Uefa for Europe's elite club competition.

Eight locally-trained players must be submitted in the 25-man A List squad, or the squad size be reduced.

Chelsea have a Champions League A List squad of 22 players, which includes summer signings Asmir Begovic, Radamel Falcao, Pedro, Baba Rahman and Kenedy.

Burkina Faso international Bertrand Traore has also been included.

Jose Mourinho's side play Maccabi Tel-Aviv in their opening Group G game on September 16.

Chelsea then play on September 29 at Mourinho's former club Porto and their third game is at Dynamo Kiev on October 20.


source:News of Ibra's return crashes website


The website of Malmo FF crashed following the news that Zlatan Ibrahimovic, who started his career with the Swedish champions, will return to the city with Paris St Germain for the group stage of the Champions League.

After beating Scottish champions Celtic to make the group stage, Malmo were drawn in Group A with Real Madrid, Shaktar Donetsk and PSG.

"There was a lot of pressure on it (the website) just after the draw was made," Malmo's head of communications Peter Ahlander told Reuters by telephone, adding that the club were delighted with the draw.

Ibrahimovic left Malmo in 2001 to join Ajax, but despite a slew of league titles with the likes of Juventus, Inter Milan, AC Milan and Barcelona, the 33-year-old has never won the Champions League.

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what too we call this for God sake,why doing this can insult in lord worship.
i wish she d think of GOD before doing this ,she was only after her market she carry on her body not the fellowship this drive me crazy .

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I will also like to make some money and get married legitimately.
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