jennykadry:

I just asked cos You said your babes pet name is Jenny and we all know Jenny is a feminine name

yea, she's a babe like me, very fyn n sweet. I love her lots.

@Efe, am nt toasting jennykadry. Jux telln her she's my babes name sake.

jennykadry:

Hang on, are you a man or a woman? Cos going by your thread you claimed woman? Don't tell me that thread of yours was a joke.

Am a woman like u, why do u ask




collect from saga

am a woman like u, why do u ask?

hmmm jenny is my babes pet name n dat got me attracted to jennykadry buh i love dem babes wit their constructive advise. But the cabal i dnt like cos it makes me sign out.
My babe jenny is so fyn n hot, hope u r @ jennykadry?? Cos mi love fyn babes.

tnx guys, am greatful. Atleast i feel good n energised. I was loosing my self esteem but i tnk God for u guys who gave me hope n believed in me. Tnk u all

swtdarling: @troubled soul,u cud sell ankara or any other type of cloth.or u cud be supplyin eggs to retailers with ur car or sell frozen foods or learn tailoring,cathering bead making,event planning etc.jst beware of credit,as it ruins business.all the best

tnx alot

caropy: madam poster, no matter the what you do to make you earn millions in an hour without humility its nothing to a man. remain at home and eat all the food and be humble to your man makes a whole lot of sense to him. so i really dont go well with those who ask you to go for business or whatever. i am sorry if i sound hash, if you go into business with the aim of showing off to your hubby that hey common, to hell with your money, i be you your marriage will soon end.

for me:
1 sit down and think of your actions that promt that statement from your hubby and amend pls
2 try not to argue with him to the point you raise your voice at him, yes you can argue and let him know ho much you are unhappy but take it slow, he is your man.
3 pls face your studies for now, two kids and study is a whole lot of work for you now. finish your studies and then get yourself a job (God will give you the best)
4 say sorry when you are wrong, demand with love he say sorry when he is wrong (you know how to do it)
5 please sieve all the advise you get here i beg you.
6 dont spoon feed your hubby with insultive words.

above all be loving, kind to him and pray for him, another thing i notice men like is praying for them, lay your hands on him and pray for him. watch it, he loves you but you need to change your ways.

thank yu sir.

nobniger: Madam jennykadry, Did you say you're confused? Nawaoo! I think so too. You would have made it into one of those Niger comedy clubs but, your incompetence has deprive you of the ability to recognize your own incompetence, a typical know-it-all Niger woman, how sad. May be this is not the 1st time you're hearing it but, you do not have a good enough sense of humor to be funny. Your brain has been deceiving you into overestimating your own intelligence. Only dumb people criticize something they do not understand. All these may be an exercise in futility because you've shown you're too naive or stu pid to understand.

oga pls is ok eeeeh.

pweetymama: where are you based?

owerri

Abbott: Just like a baby with teething problems, troubledsoul, your marriage is @ a point where such issues occur and what I will only say is that it will PASS. Be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to anger. Make your life interesting.

About what you can do:
stock gift items(You wont get to worry about expiry dates)
Sell diary products if you have light regularly(Juice, Chivita milk, La casera n bottle water)
Sell baked goods: sliced bread: UTC, Butterfield, SoftCrust, etc and maybe with poultry eggs, good for quick breakfast for large families during week days.
Otherwise, if there is none, just open like a neighbourhood mini mart.

Overall, trust in God and lean not on ur understanding. All the best.

thank u so much.

Vikin:

You can supply hair extension in retail prices, Brazilian, Peruvian, Nigerian, Ghanaian, Gambian etc...just get a good supplier to buy from, since you have your car...load them inside the trunk and go from salon to salon and introduce ya market.

Try and survey the price it goes for in a particular area before putting your price tag!

It doesn't take much, but fuel money...when you have enough to sustain a shop then you go for that.

This will also give you time for studies.

tnx alot. i do need more ideas so i can settle for d lucrative one

baby_123: Don't bother yourself, just face your studies. Won't you still have to ask your husband for the money to start the business? Nothing wrong with your husband paying your fees. He is not complaining. Just stop threatening to walk out of the marriage and leave in every argument. With your statement that "he said he won't come looking for me either" after saying "he says marriage is not a do or die affair" its obvious. If you can comfortably run your own business, run your home and go to school as well without it affecting your studies. And you really think you not having a job is the problem, then goodluck. Try catering on weekends or sewing. Money is needed sha for business venture. Assess your family purse. Some people stoop to conquer in certain situations.like Facing your books with seriousness and doing well. Then getting a nice job after graduation. Not everyone can work while in school not to talk of running a business and a home at the same time.

ok tnx but my hubby suggested it so dats y am asking.
i run a part time programme, so i hv some few hrs to learn or do sumfin.

please folks i need home services idea dat i can start n earn money frm it while completing my studies.
thanks all for ur love, care.

damiso: There really is nothing i can say that has not been already said but all i can say is that 4 yrs is still quite a young marriage.The first couple of years in marriage sometimes lays the tone for the rest of the marriage.

I think communication is key here.Thats why its often said to marry your friend that you are in love with.When all those lovey dovey phase end its mainly friendship you have left.Do you guys just talk about serious stuff i.e the kids,bills,marriage bla bla all the time?Sometimes alot of people just feel disillusioned with the whole responsibility thing and just need their spouse to be their padi once in a while.

I remember the first year i got married,hubby is the type that when he has a bad day at work he would just want to eat and sleep.I would notice he was low and would insist on him telling me what was wrong by force by fire.He would be like can we talk tomorrow and straight am on the defensive you dont talk to me and start arguing with an already stressed man.With time i learnt if he says dont wanr to talk about it right now would just say ok.In the course of the night say we are watching arsenal play(gunners family unfortunately )after we have heaped curses on then Eboue and how adebayor was just a fluke player,then watched CSI and argued on whodonit i would not need to nag for him to open up on the issue.


My own take is look for what makes the home light hearted and sometimes just be his friend.

P.S not saying its all down to you alone o,it has to be a joint thing but as it seems you are the one who is troubled maybe you can intiate it.

aite tnx

Vikin:

You should know the church song that ask God, why must I go empty handed!

OP, this case, you try and resolve it with hubby but always remember, you must not go empty handed o.,

Wish you the best!

tnx so much

[quote author=pweetymama]i love this.Op,discuss with him again.tell him u want to start something no matter how little.men like their ladies looking sexy.come on dear,r u sure u r not losing ΰя looks?though it can be threatening to them but sincerely they love it.[/quote
yea i do dress n look sexy

victorian: At Op, try to remove your mind from the fact that your hubby bought a car for u , in his name.. The bottom line is , he bought a car for u to conveniently move around, take the kids to crèche or school without hassles. It's natural for one to buy his or her spouse such gifts, and not placing the receiver's name on the receipt..it's his money..that shouldn't bring up doubts abt his trust or love for you. Haven't u seen some homes, the husband will have fleet of cars but the dares not drive any, and they still live peacefully . Secondly, stop exchanging hot words or replying with snide remarks, when talking or laying yur ideas across. For your husband to say , all these... He is getting tired but that does not mean he wants to quit or that u shud quit.. He simply wants u to realize that he gradually turning his back and that u shud change some certain attitudes u cud av displayed at home.. All he wants, is for u to change your attitude at home and stop doing irritable things.
Think back, how u were behaving, while courting..and the things he use to mention that he admires abt you... Think back and retrace your steps..
Then about getting a job? Leave job out of it, due to sexual harrassments.,I will say buisness is better, like learning a skill alongside , the degree u av . A skill that will be compatible with your home, like dressmaking, interior decor, making of hairstyles etc. I know lots of housewives that are into these skills, packaged it in such a way that will make your hubby, friends and society at large proud of u .. Sell the idea of any of these skill to your husband and let him how serious u r and how u can be able to manage your home , kids with him.. Without anyone suffering.. Then with prayers , his heart will soften...
Best of luck, I hope it works.

tnx a bunch

greatgod2012:




awwww, sorry about that, but you know men, most of them are egostic, let him realise that he is using those words to intimidate you because of his financial status and how he stopped you from working, which is why it seems you are not contributing financially to d family. Now, that things seems to be like this, insist on getting a job, use your money to take care of yourself, always look sexy, attractive and appealing, then, we shall see if he will say that "marriage no be do or die" statement again.
Sorry, it is well with you, may God guide you and give you d neccesary wisdom required in your marriage.
Shalom!

amen, tnx

dayokanu:

Is this man not caring enough, He saw his wife was sick and stressed from working a low paying job and he offered to pick bills till she finished her education and possibly get a better and less stressful job

What else should he have done to qualify as a REAL MAN?

oh mine

dayokanu:

The collateral is the husbands name on the job.

The wife most likely might not even know the details of the car purchase, She has a car to drive fine. Would she know the little details that went behind the scene, WHo the guy borrow from and who he didnt?

i know everything about the purchase of the car, infact am the one dat made the choice tru internet. he didnt borrow money to buy the car..

jennykadry:

Story. Their are other things he could use as collateral. If. You want to buy me a gift do so with my name.

@Op
Dd he buy the car with a loan?

No he paid cash shipping inclusive.

greatgod2012: @op,Sincerely, you got it all wrong from d beginning, i dont encourage women who are jobless to get married b4 getting married. 90% of d men we have nowadays prefer working class ladies, so that they wouldnot be shouldered with all d financial responsibilities of d family. Your hubby is worked up because he sees himself as too burdened with almost all d financial responsibilities in d family and you are d closest person he can transfer that aggression to. Find a way of being financially independent, and you will be surprised how things will fall back in their rightful places.
May God help us all.


Sorry for sounding too harsh on you, i told you what i could have told my sister if hes d one in your situation.
Goodluck.

i was working b4 we got married then i took in n was seriously sick n my company been a private once dropped me n after giving birth my hubby has refused me looking for job. saying he doesnt want me to work.

Vikin: You just need your financial independence and everything will change.

He is getting pissed off since he does almost everything at home, I mean financially! While you sit and demand, demand ....

Keep ur head high and make reasons for him to see your worth.

I believe you are special in some ways, let him know that!

Wish u well

i once tld him i need a job wit my ond or i do biz but he said i shud focus on my studiies dat he is nt complaining. that he can take care of me n my needs.

thanks@jenny, jidegirl, slimchi, ile......

greatgod2012: First of all, have you sincerely examined yourself?
Are you sure you are not d one pushing him into extreme?
What exactly do you contribute to d marriage?
Do you have kids for him?
Do you constantly nag or engage in hot argument with him?
Do you always have cause to constantly complain about something you have or do not have in your marriage?
Do you always compare your marriage with that of his friends or your own friends?
Do you love his family and does he love your family?


Sorry for all these questions, your answers to these questions may be why he talks to you d way he does.
May God help us all.

yea i have kids, 4 n 2 yrs
i do compare him, i love his family n some how love mine
we do have hot quarel but once in a while.
we both tell eachother wat we want to see in the marriage n wat we dont want aswell.

jennykadry:

How much longer have you got to go with studies? You need your independence first off and secondly, who buys his wife a car in his name? I don't get it.

No spouse is supposed to say that to the other half. That is just bringing down your self esteem. See yourself as a princess and carry yourself as one, its either he catches up with you or learn to work with you. I want to be appreciated and loved by my spouse and not the other way round.

i have 2 more years to go.

ileobatojo:

It's not really that confusing. The fact that he is being responsible in terms of financial support towards you does not translate to fire burning in his loins heart for you. You just need to find a way to rekindle the fire.

rekindle d fire u say?? ok i wil try n hope it works, though i made up my mind this year to be a listenning wife while he do all the talking cos dat wat he really wants.

jidegirl12: Answer this sincerely please.

Do you nag or pick up fights with him every-time?

not everytym. actually he nags (alot) more than me.

jennykadry:

Do you live in Nigeria? Can you afford to pay your fees yourself? Because he thinks you cannot survive without him seeing that he takes care of your every financial need

yea i live in nigeria, i dont hav a job nor biz. so NO cant afford to pay my fees.