These days, it’s almost a common incidence to hear that someone got married and after sometime she wants out.
” I married the wrong person..”, “I wish I never married him…” are the most common phrases they use.

Quick question: Why are people always fast to conclude they married the wrong person once marital issues surface? Will two different people from two different backgrounds not have clash of opinions sometimes? Just wondering.
So let me quickly add before I continue that because you are having problems in your marriage doesn’t always mean you married wrong. It means you need to w....continue reading>>> http://virtueandintimacy.com/2016/04/18/how-not-to-marry-the-wrong-person/

These days, it’s almost a common incidence to hear that someone got married and after sometime she wants out.
” I married the wrong person..”, “I wish I never married him…” are the most common phrases they use.

Quick question: Why are people always fast to conclude they married the wrong person once marital issues surface? Will two different people from two different backgrounds not have clash of opinions sometimes? Just wondering.
So let me quickly add before I continue that because you are having problems in your marriage doesn’t always mean you married wrong. It means you need to w....continue reading>>> http://virtueandintimacy.com/2016/04/18/how-not-to-marry-the-wrong-person/

Can someone pls answer this question: why has virginity gone obsolete these days?

Why do people think something is wrong with u or u are being hypocritical once u say u are a virgin?

It's like u don't belong until u have tasted d 'forbidden fruit' (sex). Why must it be?


Let me explain d virgin word better: Regardless of your past, whether you have been sexually active or not, as long you have chosen to keep your body (out of your love and fear for God) and save sex for marriage, u are d virgin I mean here.

So here's the letter.

Dear Virgin,

I know the world thinks you are obsolete right now because you chose to hold on to one of the most precious things God has given you, your innocence. I know sometime friends and peers make you feel you don’t belong. They call you naive, outdated and queer. As a matter of fact, they think something is wrong with you...read more===>http://virtueandintimacy.com/2016/03/21/a-letter-to-a-virgin/

marshalcarter:

Tnx man....me sef don taya for the tin

Uwc

marshalcarter:
Buh yhu knw it isn't easy to desist from all these

I agree with u. It is not easy to desist from these but that doesn't mean it's impossible. Human strength is feeble and self discipline will fail u but God cannot.

It takes God to help us desist. When u come to d point where u decide enough is enough and then turn to God to help u in ur weakness, that's d beginning of victory. The secret is learning to depend on God's strength and not urs cos human strength is limited.

This is one reason why most christians struggle. They rely on their physical strength to overcome a bad habit instead of relying on God.

Her husband of 13 years bought a new phone and it was exciting for him. But then he picked up the habit of downloading porn daily in his phone. That was when she became miserable.



Her name is Salima (name changed). With time, her husband started forcing her to imitate the porn stars.

She was reluctant yet she complied with her husband’s new found amusement with great difficulty. But as time went by, Salima put her foot down and began to refuse her husband’s demands. And it turned for worse.

Her incensed husband beat her up, so much so that she was admitted in a hospital following severe injuries.

This is a true story of a woman’s plight in the hands of a ‘used to be’ wonderful husband whose attitude changed when porn came into his life and into his marriage.

Bringing porn into your marriage is a dangerous thing to do. Please mark the word ‘dangerous’. Porn in itself is destructive and I won’t go on to mention how many homes and relationships it has destroyed.

But why would someone in his right senses even pay any attention to porn when 90-something percent of what they do is an ‘act’? That means it isn’t real. Think it’s a lie? Ask those who work behind the scenes on porn set.

If you want to spice up your sex life, porn is the wrongest place to go if you truly love your marriage. Soon, in another article, I will show you how to spice up your sex life, you know, make sex taste like new wine every time you have it with your spouse. Is that possible? Of course it is.

Get rid of porn and here’s why.

Porn is destructive

Homes, like in the story above, have been broken because of this abomination. I know even some Christians use porn to spice up their marriage. They feel it’s okay because they are married. But what is okay about watching two unmarried people engaging in a sexual act publicly and without shame?

Sex in itself ought to be a private occurrence between a man and his wife…a man and his wife (for emphasis). It’s for their eyes only. The making of porn completely violates this rule.



Porn affects intimacy between married couples

One clear quality of porn is that it objectifies the woman. She is only a intimacy gadget, a tissue wipe subjected to doing even the basest of the man’s imaginations. Why did you think Salim pulled out of her husband’s insane demands? She couldn’t keep up with it plus the emotional torture.

The man stops seeing the wife as a wife but as a tool for sexual satisfaction and God help you when you don’t comply, he will  either beat you or go and find another woman who will give it to him or both.

Even when having sex with his spouse, he isn’t seeing his wife in his head, he is imagining he is making love to a porn star. Will affection and attraction for his wife not wear thin over time?

In some cases also, the man or woman turns to masturbation (without the spouse knowing). All he needs do is visualize it in his head and bam, the picture appears. At a time, he may start preferring to masturbate than to have sex with his wife.

This a big problem folks. Porn is like a sweet poison that kills intimacy softly and slowly. It poisons the mind, flooding one’s brain every second with lusty images.

A woman woke up in the middle of the night to hear her husband jerking it off under the sheets all by himself. He was clearly masturbating. Does it not baffle you that a man should be helping himself when his wife is lying right by his side?

Sex is one thing that makes couples bond better in marriage. When sex goes, the couple will grow apart emotionally and physically. It’s only a matter of time when the marriage packs up. Is this what you want?

Porn is addictive

Porn is appealing to the flesh. It satisfies man’s most innate fantasies. People are drawn to porn because it gives them the capability of living in a totally different sexual planet where even their most animalistic desires are fed.

There is no taking a sneak peak in porn. For instance, you’ve heard of porn but you’ve never watched one. Out of curiosity and somehow a sexual yearning between your legs, you decide to take a ‘brief’ look, say for a few seconds.

Don’t worry. With time, the seconds will turn to minutes, then to hours, to days, months , years and pro’ly for the rest of your life. It has such magnetic power to capture your attention.

It is only an act

Most of it isn’t real. All those huge ‘mandingos’, the sex positions, the desire, the length of time they spend in the hardcore sex, they are all fake by 95%. This is according to porn director,  Seymour Butts (his aka), who had been in the porn business for 20 yrs.

If it’s all fake, why look at them talk more of imitating them? Why allow something that isn’t even real destroy your marriage? Porn has been edited, photoshopped and packaged. Porn is a lie. Why buy it at the cost of your home?

God hates porn

The first thing I ask myself before I even venture into doing something is, ‘Does this please God?’ That is the attitude of every heart that truly loves God. They don’t want to take part in anything outside God.

Yes, God hates porn and has asked us to flee from every appearance of evil. Obey.

Watching porn has spiritual consequences

This is the part that physical eyes don’t see but it is there. Exposing yourself and your marriage to porn only serves as an invitation to demonic entities that oversee the porn industry.

It makes you to keep going back until you are totally enslaved by it and controls your life. How can you live day by day with those repulsive images playing back and forth in your head?

This is the sickening truth. The truth, they say, is bitter but it must be told and thank God, I have spilled it. If you feel your sex life is boring and you want to heat things up again with your spouse, there are creative ways of doing it.

Full access here===> http://virtueandintimacy.com/2016/03/24/porn-and-intimacy-does-porn-improve-sexual-intimacy-in-marriage/

It burdens my heart how many people out there that are going through relationship crisis in their marriage. Statistics have it that about 50 percent of marriages end in divorce. It's baffling but why is it so?

Why are people not enjoying their marriage like God intended it to be? Is it not possible for marriage to be a lifetime any more?

Make no mistake, every marriage has it's own problems..every single marriage but still some couples, despite their challenges and differences still live together in love whereas others have caved in under the pressure called irreconcilable differences.

People are looking for answers, for the marriage antidote. Many are heart broken, jilted or  abused. They want to comforted.

So I really wish we could share our marriage experiences, our challenges and our victories right here. Share your stories and your pain. Please rant if you want to rant or you have a question, please feel free and ask. Am sure there are people here who would have godly, seasoned answers to give you.

This forum is just to encourage and support someone who is depressed and going through a relationship crisis so they'd know they are not alone.

So many have committed suicide just because of a relationship gone bad. Let's make this the place people can come to and find an answer, a solution, an encouragement. Let's be family.

I have had my fair share of marital storms. It isn't easy but for God's grace. But I noticed that each time hubby and I overcome, our love grows.

NB: Show love here and don't judge please. That's what God wants - teaching the truth in love.

Let's find godly solutions to our marriage/relationship problems here. If you have a prayer request, forward it. It's welcome cos there's nothing impossible with God.

Love you all and God bless you.