Evolution baby ,  The herbivore-carnivore "upgrade" begins with a dislike for greens and a craving for meat.     

mutters to himself: wonder what we'll see next ,

Another glaring example of the ineffectiveness of advocacy against such harmful practices in Nigeria; Legislation banning FGM and proposing approprate punishment for offenders is yet to be passed into law in Nigeria. Sad thing is if you had been in nearby Ghana, Central African Republic, Cote d'Ivoire, Burkina Faso or Djibouti (to name a few), you would have had the full weight of the law behind you in your quest for ensuring your daughter's rights are not violated. Guess you'll just have to e bold enough to stand up to them and say a firm no. Believe you me, when your daughter's a woman, she'll love you for it. All the best.

FGM: Female Genital Mutilation/ Cutting.

@Mustay
More like better than Martin Luther King.

Make una no worry , come may y'all will remember webbo told y'all

A nationwide urban legend has long suggested that extortion is the main business the Nigerian Police are into; They merely use the guise of protecting lives and property as a smokescreen to cover the real reason for the existence of the force in the country today. It is said that this is accepted in the highest corridors of police power and daily returns are expected from junior officers sent on checkpoint duty or patrol. Much like boarding house fagging where u get sent by a senior to buy grub without a startup capital and are expected to produce change kwa!

Back to the game:

People get robbed on Third Mainland if they stop for more than 15 mins between 1 am and 4 am ,

OK, So I'm not nostradamus or prescient in anyway but 2 nights ago I had this dream in which Chelsea won all 4(1 down- Carling cup, 3 to go).
I know Red devils out there are unwilling to relent; some even believe in an 8 year cycle maturation for a treble.
But what if ,  Just what if ,  Chelsea come through as league, FA and European winners?
Wouldn't that b awesome?

Wouldn't that b footballing history?

What side r u on predictable outcomes or Shocking in-your-face history? 

Bets r open.

@Seun
Very funny!!!

@Debostar
It is generally advisable to work with at least one of the 2 people u've mentioned above if u think u can't afford both. Why? Even if you have the time to acquire knowledge of the idiosyncracies of putting up a building in Lagos, U would do yourself the most service by being the honourable proprietor who crosschecks what's going on on his plot with the background information he has to ensure coherence.
Secondly, i doubt very much that u're a building/civil engineer. I could b wrong though. If you're not one, then u definitely should have one pop in to your site while construction's going on. Let him/her add his/her input to the building plans - if u intend to put up a lasting edifice. Experience (and not theory only) would be the desirable trait in your engineer by the way.
At the end of the day, you can save from building with an effective, malleable yet focused small time contractor who's willing to take instructions from your engineer. Whatever u do don't leave out an engineer in your plans - or ,like Seun rightly alluded, u might b arrested one day for being the landlord of  a collapsed building.

So as far as cost implication's concerned, building without an engineer might be cheaper in terms of building cost , but costly in other depts. As per a contractor - c'mon u need one , u'll probably give up on the building if you decide to build without one.

I get bored sitting at home on the weekends (who doesn't?). Yesterday, I decided to pay yet anoda visit to a pool parlor in my area of town (Lagos). I had barely spent about 2 hours when plainclothes policemen came in and arrested everyone within the bar.(Their excuse? They got an anonymous tip that "Cult boys" were fighting within the bar and disturbing the peace.) Ok. So I get bundled into a danfo along with 15 other boys to the nearest station amidst threats of lifethreatening injury if i don't comply and we get thrown behind the counter. A couple of the boys i'm with know the 411 and start making calls " Lasisi, E ma bo wa Sabo ,E mowo dani o"(Lasisi, Come to Sabo Station with some money) but idealistic me's still wondering when i'm goingto be offered an explanation on why i was picked up.
After a quasi-interrogation: Who r u? Where d'u work? Show some ID, What happened at the bar tonite? Ok sit on the floor and take off your shoes!!!!! What??: We were left on the floor for about 90 minutes. Then the namecalling began: An officer would come around, call 2 or 3 boys and that would b the last we'll see of them. Eventually I summoned up enuf courage and talk to one of the lowlives; He asks me for 5k before i can b "released". I eventually part with about 2k cos it's like midnite and i had people to do and things to see today, One of them being to have a word with the proprietor of the parlor(a fellow pool enthusiast), demanding an explanation on why a honest respectable citizen like yours truly who's only "sin" that nite was the love of a board game would be subjected to such utter humiliation within his premises. Providence saved me the trip however as just as i was stepping out, along came the proprietor himself. Now i'm thinking, ok this guys's even civil enuf to come stand up for his patrons; so i ease up on the accusations and innocently ask what his take on the whole issue was.
Dude begins to talk and I realize I just made a very serious error of character. He's like the standing agreement between him and the cops in the area is that once they catch a scent (real or imagined) of anything noisy around his parlor, a round up, arrest (and extortion) should follow. IMAGINE!!!!! IMAGINE DE LA PRENIYON!!!!!! I just walk away disappointed in the whole concept of a country we call Nigeria, too tired to begin to explain to him how tonite's event, if frequent enuf could turn his place into a ghost parlor. If Dude don't get it. It's not my business. I can live without pool!!!

Hilarious thread!
Casper , the one about the microwave , outta this world!!  

Just had to post this.

America's Blonde Female Alliance (ABFA) decided it was time to put an end to the dumb blond cliche. It was to b a decisive end and required nationwide attention so they organised a one day convention in Madison Square Garden. The turnout was impressive. All across the arena was a sea of blondes.It was the largest gathering of same hair coloured individuals in the history of the world and it was beautiful. Reverend James Tucker, a strong equal opportunity advocate mounted the podium and began to speak:

Rev: Tonite, I lend my voice to the blond nation to say this dumb blond myth must be done away with ,

Crowd: YES!!!

Rev: For we are all God's children and He made all things beautiful in His time ,

Crowd: YES SIR!!!

Rev: And so, in the presence of over 400 million viewers worldwide, we'll put to rest this myth once and for all by conducting a simple test ,

Crowd: Go Ahead!!!

Rev: (Randomly selects blond lady from audience) , Would you be kind enuf to tell the world what 5 added to 5 is?

Blond: 55?

Crowd: GIVE HER ONE MORE CHANCE ,

Blond: 25?

Crowd: ONE MORE CHANCE ,

Blond: 10?

Crowd: ONE FINAL CHANCE ,

@ maneater
word!!!

tips off hat

c'mon zulu be a good boy and holla!!!

2 standard plots in kuje area @ a reasonable price. Interested? Call 08037103659, 08069075078

Hi Segoye,
Could u send a mail to lusegzy@yahoo.com?
We'll talk.
Cheers.

ok let's see what we can do to help here
@ Daviso
How long have you been Insomnic?
Which is more of a problem for you , falling asleep initially or getting back to sleep after you've been woken up?
Do you have these episodes of fast heartbeats during the day also? Do you also break out in sweat when they occur?
When you say your job is well paid are you saying you r exempt from financial pressure?

@iamworried
If your child is nine months old and your husband still complains or you still think you r slack down there, you will need to see a gynecologist. There are remedies for that.

Cheers.

h

funtopia ,


ou , yes together!!

@ PTB , Good gal , knows a gud laff catalyst when she sees one

@ the boys , SMH (shaking my head)

, and i'll trim ur toenails with my singer sewing machine ,

Thank you o Seun , I had a theory that we had male-bashers on nairaland after going through several threads. Turns out i was right . .
So people, there was no survey , and i am in no way threatened by strength from the opposite gender. Just wanted to brand my dear muki, lady T and J girl - male bashers. Gotcha! Thread closed.

@ the cameroonian weebo
You are lost and dejected. think you should kind of seek some help or else you'd turn into JERRY

, no abuses bro , ?

@fellow ,
Sad for you bro ,
Sad for you ,
Don't worry you'll get bitten real soon. That'll open your eyes.Unless you belong to those pitiable ones that'll do anything to keep a woman in their lives. Let's see how much respect she has for you when she discovers she can wind u like ,

Jakarta


q

@j-girl
to borrow Lady T's phrase , SMH (shaking my head)

Demise my dear, means death! Kpafuka! Quench! Capische?

@ Lady T:
Same question.


@ Muki :
I wonder if you'll make the 75% cut ,

Alright Prof J-girl , Question:
How come 75% of women(above 50 years) who outlive their husbands follow him home within 5 years of his demise while only 20% of the flipside occurs?

that's right muki , tell 'em who's boss
tell 'em who their daddy's are!!! , oops sorry guess u didn't mean it dat way ,

but why , ?

@ Mukina
Hope u've read my reply to ur last post in my PC or my girlfriend? If u don't have anything constructive to add . .the least u can do is keep ur opinion 2 u.


@Lady T

Come and get me , mummy ,

@ Lady T
I notice u're not disputing anything , so the one night stand thing's true? And yes , women do look up to men to set the pace , then y'all work out anoda way of doing the same thing , and pat urselves on the back saying "what a man can do , "