maclatunji: Eyah. If you were a Muslim, I would have said consider marrying her. She wants a man and has set her eyes on you. No woman would like a co-wife so I understand your wife's position too.

To be honest marrying her sorts out many problems. If we say she should go and look for her own man, what will happen to your neices and nephews?

Talk to your wife about it, who knows she may have the heart of a saint. However, is your ex-brother's wife a decent woman? Can she relate with your wife with respect?

Your story is one of the reasons I can't claim 100% that polygamy is out of the question for me even if I prefer monogamy.

It is a tough call.

Yield: You've a good heart, Sir. Keep it up. I don't really know what to advice right now ...whether you should marry her or not. Only you can really decide what's best anyway. But definately, don't stop helping and caring for her and don't avoid her like the poster above me said. You're both adults and shouldn't resort to avoiding her. Communicate.

huni_naija: First of all your "engrish" is atrocious by the time i got to the last line my eyes where watering. Personally, i don't think its a good idea to marry your senior brother's wife, what would your family even think of this union? I am aware that certain cultures allow the brother of the deceased to marry his wife. However, do you fall into this category?

it seems you have a generous heart and its best you talk things through than to entangle yourself in a situation that will only complicate matters...

RedBenson: u mean ur brother married a wife he was older than by 20yrs? Na wa o.

wazobia_for_u: My humble advice is, try as much as possible to not allow her to show her full interest in you by wanting to hugg or kiss you or even by saying it straight, avoid her as much as possible and let her know she is free to remarry any other person if she likes.

Dont toy with fire .... The case is just like cultism case, is better not to ear it or feel it, if not your life is on high tension

olawole oladipo: Dear Colleagues,

Unfortunately, I lost my senior brother (the same mother the same father) three years ago at age of 50, my brother left one wife with five children. My brother's wife still young (thirty years) plus. She so interest on me after the burial/outing service or some months later, she always calling me on the phone that I abandoned her. In fact, I try my best for her by sending money to her through bank account to take herself because I'm leaving at Ajah, My brother did not complete his house project before his untimely death, myself with support of family member complete the building and she is living there at Ogijo Ikorodu. Also her first son (19 years old)stay with me and caring for him. There was a day she told me on the phone that "Did i think she will marry another person after 5 children to my brother" and everything is not money, she want to see me, Infact I feel somehow that day.

In conclusion, as a christian I don't want to cheat my own "housewife" or look like I'm commiting adultery or fornication. What Can I do? to marry her, OR to tell her to leave my brother's house to go and marry another person with five children.

Please I need your Help.

From Safejourney, Ajah, Lagos

seeking@truth:
If you love your late brother's wife please marry her.

maclatunji: Eyah. If you were a Muslim, I would have said consider marrying her. She wants a man and has set her eyes on you. No woman would like a co-wife so I understand your wife's position too.

To be honest marrying her sorts out many problems. If we say she should go and look for her own man, what will happen to your neices and nephews?

Talk to your wife about it, who knows she may have the heart of a saint. However, is your ex-brother's wife a decent woman? Can she relate with your wife with respect?

Your story is one of the reasons I can't claim 100% that polygamy is out of the question for me even if I prefer monogamy.

It is a tough call.

greggng: Bros if i were in your shoes i will table this matter with my wife. discuss it objectively and if you have what it takes financially to cater for her needs why not marry her.After all God has a reason for bringing that lovely woman into your family....please let no one attack me for saying she is lovely cos from what you narrated , she must have had a good relationship with your brother. Death can come anytime.

Eze Promoe:
@ bolded
She gave birth to him at the age of 11+?
And her husband married her at the age of 31+?

*puts on 3D glass*

come again please.

seeking@truth:
If you love your late brother's wife please marry her.

greggng: Bros if i were in your shoes i will table this matter with my wife. discuss it objectively and if you have what it takes financially to cater for her needs why not marry her.After all God has a reason for bringing that lovely woman into your family....please let no one attack me for saying she is lovely cos from what you narrated , she must have had a good relationship with your brother. Death can come anytime.

olawole oladipo: Dear Colleagues,

Unfortunately, I lost my senior brother (the same mother the same father) three years ago at age of 50, my brother left one wife with five children. My brother's wife still young (thirty years) plus. She so interest on me after the burial/outing service or some months later, she always calling me on the phone that I abandoned her. In fact, I try my best for her by sending money to her through bank account to take herself because I'm leaving at Ajah, My brother did not complete his house project before his untimely death, myself with support of family member complete the building and she is living there at Ogijo Ikorodu. Also her first son (19 years old)stay with me and caring for him. There was a day she told me on the phone that "Did i think she will marry another person after 5 children to my brother" and everything is not money, she want to see me, Infact I feel somehow that day.

In conclusion, as a christian I don't want to cheat my own "housewife" or look like I'm commiting adultery or fornication. What Can I do? to marry her, OR to tell her to leave my brother's house to go and marry another person with five children.

Please I need your Help.

From Safejourney, Ajah, Lagos