If the parrot is in a mansion in Potomac or Bethesda Maryland,you never know what a translocated parrot might do.
Don't underestimate parrots O

I'm sure you understand I was just kidding.
Cheating is inexcusable but it's not unforgivable,neither should the perpetrator be stoned to death.
That's just my point.

faketan, it's one thing if the cheating happened while they were still apart. actually it wouldnt even be called "cheating". Im just confused as in why did this happen when they were finally fixing their relationship. Now if the bf was acting like this cos it happened when they were apart, I'd be the first to say he's an obnoxious immature jerk like aisha's slowpoke but they were trying to start anew, so i dont blame him for reacting in such a way.

nwando:

I'm sure you understand I was just kidding.
Cheating is inexcusable but it's not unforgivable,neither should the perpetrator be stoned to death.
That's just my point.

Good point.
I remember a bible story about a woman that was caught in adultery. (meanwhile the man that shagged her was not caught)
She was to be stoned to death, but Jesus asked for the person without sin to cast the first stone (some people are casting their stone on this thread).
They all dropped their stones and disappeared starting from the oldest guy.

No matter how dark the sin is, THANK GOD THERE IS FORGIVENESS.

@ poster, if your ex would not forgive and forget. GOD HAS FORGIVEN YOU.

Go and sin no more.

Baby

If i understood your story well
You were having a slight break up with your guy when you met this other guy in school and started 9 months after right?
now assuming that is right, i'd say

Your guy is being a little selfish and childish
However you did right by telling him
he will scorn you now but when he is more mature he will appreciate your honesty
Just wait until he gets some of these unfaithful dogs we have around he will understand your value

Anyway, delete his number and try not to remember it so that even if you feel tempted to call him, you will not be able to
Then pray hard and turn towards your books ,
Your success is the only thing that matters for now
CHEER UP and work hard baby

I’m a Christian, devoted one but I still find myself doing things I don’t want to do. I’ve battled with this for along time but thank God I’ve been delivered.

God is faithful. I met my fiancé when I was neither hot nor cold as a Christian. He was not born again then, our relationship has lasted for about 6years but sometime around 2003 we parted ways then meet again in 2004 to start all over again. He became born again during the period of our separation.

In 2003 I gained admission to a school where I met a guy (a yr ahead of me in school), we started as friends, he usually help me with my assignments and we also read together. We discussed issues, our relationships, family and ambition. I told him about my ex-boyfriend and he did same but along the line one thing led to another after 9months of our friendship, even though the guy wanted something serious but I was not ready for any commitment but unexpectedly my ex-boyfriend came back. The fact is that I love my ex-boyfriend so much just that we needed a break to define what we want from each other. So, when he came back I accepted him and we started a new relationship, told him about my relationship with the guy in my school, he did same too and we promised to keep to each other.
Little did I know that I was in for trouble because the other guy won’t let me be then the unfortunate happened (***) again. My conscience won’t let me rest after what happened between me and my school guy , so I determined not to let such happen again, I told him I’m back with my boyfriend and want us to go our separate ways which he agreed after he realized that I was really determined to do away with him, then I blocked all means of reaching me, thank God he doesn’t know my house, decided to do something that makes me post this msg.

I rededicated my life to God this year and had a covenant with him to tell my fiancé the secret between me and my school guy because I don’t want to keep secret that will destroy my marriage. I have seen marriages that were broken because of past secrets. I told my fiancé everything that happened between me and the guy in my school, how I cheated on him. Even though I know the unexpected could happen but I still want to clear my conscience and fulfill that covenant, my fiancé call-off the relationship and vow never to have anything to do with me again ‘because I betrayed our love, he can’t trust me anymore, he has forgiven me but can’t forget it, so it’s better we part ways.

Well, I still call him everyday, we just talk but he has told me times without number that I should forget about him and move on. I really want to move on but I just can’t, I feel empty, can’t stop crying everyday. I can’t even tell my friends. I feel like I’ve lost everything. I have an exam to write in 3wks but can’t concentrate. I’ve developed migraine. I admitted my wrongdoing but please I need your advice on how to get over this.

Please I need your advice

Above are the facts.
Seen people posting comments based on sentiments and emotions, or not even reading the story to the end
I have read some people say that the guy was childish, and it got me thinking She confessed so she gets thumbs up for cheating
Somebody said that the guy actually needs time, I absolutely agree. Infidelity is a bitter pill to swallow. If you injure yourself, the wound heals but the scar remains, thats the situation here


@Poster

What is most important is to put this behind you and pass your exams so that this mistake will not be worse than the latter. I also agree that if he is yours, he will find his way back (earning back the trust will be an uphill task even if he does come back).

You did a honourable thing by telling him, some will say. But others might look at it that you were more or less trying to protect your future, marriage wise should you guys get married. Ther are no free lunches even in freetown.

I hope you guys work things out, all the best

hey beegood
dont know y im so attracted to ur story, i guess u sound slightly like sm1 i once dated. the truth is most people cheat but of course they wont admit it, but thts still no xcuse!

i ll find it very hard to forgive my gfriend if she cheats so u cant blame ur guy.but if he loves u he l come back. however, u should have been thinking abt him when u where slepping with this other guy. u also shld have let him realise u had a problem with sex, most guys can relate with tht, he even might have had very practical tips to help u, thts what a relationship is about.
the only thing any1 can tellu now is go and sin no more. but dont feel too bad most of us cheat. i can assure u 90% of the people on this post have cheated at least 1ce, i take tht back 99%, most guys who dont cheat either cant get their d.ck up or have no p.ssy to f.ck. i dated my last gfriend 4 abt a year and it took all my self control not to cheat on her. i can say shes the only girl ive ever dated tht i didnt cheat on, i attribute it to maturity, if u dont take urself too seriously u ll outgrow ur sexual urges

i can imagine exactly i u feel, but next time u shd be more tactful with restitution.

i can imagine exactly how u feel, but next time u shd be more tactful with restitution.

@nwado
good analysis.

@poster
go on with your life and stop calling him. He needs time for the wound to be healed.

@ almondjoy, i've gone thru ur replies to this particular posts and i think u r taking things a lil overboard. whatever your challenge is, i'll advise you chose more appropriate words to express your opinions and pls don't make it look like there is something wrong with people confessing their sins. Ever heard of the word "nemesis"?

@poster, if your story is real, i don't think that ur ex is the guy u've been waiting to spend the rest of ur life with. Just take a walk, and let him remain in ur past. que sara sara.

cherrypie:

@ almondjoy, i've gone through your replies to this particular posts and i think you're taking things a little overboard. whatever your challenge is, i'll advise you chose more appropriate words to express your opinions and please don't make it look like there is something wrong with people confessing their sins. Ever heard of the word "nemesis"?

@poster, if your story is real, i don't think that your ex is the guy u've been waiting to spend the rest of your life with. Just take a walk, and let him remain in your past. que sara sara.

I have left this thread please.  Don't bother calling me back to it.  I have written ma piece. . . concentrate on another poster please.  Thank you for your observation!  This thread is 4 pages long, nothing more to be noted here.  Please have the least motivation to visit other new ones coming up.  I really get bored with threads after the first 2 pages, especially if they really have nothing important to "keep me thinking".  The poster has moved on.  I have too!  No apologies.


_{Slamming the door as hard as I can with both hands and feet!}

GOODBYE THREAD!

The Bible says he that  covers his sin shall not PROSPER ,but he that confesses his sin and forsake them, him he  will have mercy on.

My dear sister,the Bible talks so much about restitution and the its impact on the children of God.


You have done exactly what you are suppossed to do and please leave the rest to the Almighty God to decide because the Bible says that what looks pleasing to man might not please God

Please stop crying and thinking,it is not the end of the world.  PRAY THAT THE WILL OF GOD WILL BE DONE IN YOUR LIFE.

Since you have done that which pleases GOD,he will clothe you with favour and do that which will glorify him in your life.


I am very sure that if that man is meant for you, he will come back,but if the other way round,God will surprise you with the man that will cherish you and care for you all the days of your life.


Stop calling him and TRUST IN GOD,NOT IN MAN .

Poster
I feel u. . . .sorry huh. . .
Its not over until it is over. . .err disappointment is always a blessing. . .

Learn to love yourself again, it is his lost.
You are a responsible person for taking that step and i am very sure that. . . .
Time will heal your heart and you will find out in a while that he didn't even worth it.

Don't beat yourself up over what has happened. . .what u did was absolutely right. . . . .
Always remember that the past is not coming back, take courage and move forward to a positive future.

The most important thing is that you had "made" peace with your conscience.With time i believe your man will appreciate you more.I will advice you put all your effort on your study,if you guys are meant for each other i am sure Cupid will bring you together if not,Go make the best out of life,alot of guys are out there who will feel honoured to have you.

Ecomog:

The most important thing is that you had "made" peace with your conscience.With time i believe your man will appreciate you more.I will advice you put all your effort on your study,if you guys are meant for each other i am sure Cupid will bring you together if not,Go make the best out of life,alot of guys are out there who will feel honoured to have you.

i second that

@Sam Milla
a clown "You admitted what other agero girls will not""

@Outsrip
His heart is obviously broken, i hope without amendement

@topic
How best on earth can women handle men??

@poster
At d end of every dark tunnel, comes a shinning light
if ur involvement with the school guy is after u made up with your boyfriend then i can put myself in his shoes,but then he shouldnt let his anger go on for too long.
But if all these happened just before your re-conciliation, i can say u are just too nice to admitt,and deserve a second chance, i mean if God can forgive all sins, what more a mortal being like us
U have a life ahead of u girl, the best is yet to come, it might not be so easy letting go, but what do u do? kill yourself?? for a guy who probably dont worth it.
Get focus, thats the much u need now,your exam should matter and just believe things will eventually turn around for good, where not THE FUTURE IS GREATER. Take care o

don't worry. the right man will come ur way in JESUS name. pple like u are not common. u told him ur past without him asking u and he is jurdging u with that.

FACE UR STUDING, AM SURE HE WILL COME BACK BEGGING

IT IS WELL WITH U, MOVE ON

you should have allow ur boyfriend confess his own mistake, or do u want to tell me that ur boyfriend did not cheat on you. well take heart and read ur books for the exams coming up good luck.

What a Daft confession!

As much as i love to tell the truth and hear the truth even if it hurts i realise that ^{people loathe truth} So stop calling him, keep ur head straight, concentrate on your studies and move on with your life at least u've satisfied ur conscience and i tell you that the right man will come your way soon.Goodluck

@ poster,

I sense some naivety on your pat in thinking that all you need to do is confess to cheating on your fiance and all will be well.

Men find it hard to swallow such.

Forget all the allusions to the maturity or otherwise of the person involved.

I assure you that you will not find any man that will just part you on the back and tell you its ok after you cheated on him.

The fact remains that he would be thinking that you cannot be trusted in marriage if you can sleep with someone else, even while you were engaged to him ,and probably sleeping with him too.

Whats up with that?

It would be understandable if he was still out of the picture.

So is your relationships about sex?

You mentioned he became born-again too. Could it be that he decided not to sleep with you till marriage, and you on the other hand , couldnt bare to stay without?

I am curious cause you could have been more disciplined and avoided this.

I would think very seriously about having anything more to do with you if I was in his shoes(and so would most of the men sounding "correct" here).

Men are wired differently from women and things like this are hardly forgotten.

If he remains with you, he would always answer his own questions of :

1) Was I not man enough that she had to go sleep with someone else?

2)What was the attraction for the other guy?

3)Why would another man drink from my own cistern and fountain and the bearer gave it willingly?

Its all about the male Ego and it wont change. Especially if the guy in question was faithful to you at that time.

So move on and stop pestering him with your calls.

Let him have the time to clear his head and make his decisions.

If you make him come back half-heartedly, he will punish you in many different ways cause he would still be nursing the pains.

Face your sturdies and finish your schooling .

Hopefully , you will become better informed with this lesson.

Well, most peeps have spoen well already.
Let me add my 2cents.
I do not blame your boyfriend for his reaction neither do I blame you for either your confession or your sins.
Human beings are irrational and are bound to follow their minds.
I bet that most ladies would have behaved like your boyfriend did. I think it is an initial reaction (repulsion ) but if he persists, go your way.
Living with a guiltless and/or clear conscience is better than keeping the status quo and living a lie!
Your 'boyfriend' is no saint but is however, under no compulsion to take you back.
Cheer up and look at life ahead of you! There are so many 'good' guys out there .  .  .

hi,
Y is it dt women are alwz @ d receiving end.D guy shld have given her another chance 4 crying out loud!
d baby opened up  n he walks.What if it was d girl who walked after his confession.I prefer those who damn consequences n open up.

Babe, better write urexams n stop worrying over irrelevant issues. d right guy will come.

On the face of this post I would say agree that he was rather harsh on walking out after ur confession but something tells me there's a missing fact: Are you sure you and this guy were not together during those time you were sleeping with the school boy? - that will be the only reason he;s so hurt

If your answer is sincerly 'NO" then i suggest u move on- You 2 are never meant to be

pls go ahead and cry, its part of the healing process AND then MOVE ON.someone else will come along.

It is awful that he had to leave you after you told him the deal with the guy at school,but trust me girlfriend I feel ur pain and hope that the good lord strengthens you I also hope you feel better enough to concentrate on reading for your exams.Do take it easy he might just come back.

Let me add this, if it'll be any help

My girlfriend told me about her past- which isnt pleasant and I get really sad anytime I think about it but just when I want to tell her I cant cope something tells me how much I'd miss her if I do. So i believe your man will come back to you, just give him a lil space to think straight

A confession too bitter to swallow. I would react same way, if i were your boyfriend. Learn to keep mum. Dont answer any question you are not asked. Just move on, life has a way of paying back, life could still compensate yopu for saying the truth and opening up. All the best!

swoosh:

On the face of this post I would say agree that he was rather harsh on walking out after your confession but something tells me there's a missing fact: Are you sure you and this guy were not together during those time you were sleeping with the school boy? - that will be the only reason he;s so hurt

If your answer is sincerly 'NO" then i suggest u move on- You 2 are never meant to be

A lot of the people here don't understand the issue here.

The guy didnt just walk away because of her past. Everyone has a past and anyone who doesnt have a past is probably some kind of phantom.

The real issue why the guy walked ,according to the poster's story, is that she slept with the 'school boy' after they(she and the main guy) made a decision to date/court.

Thats the issue and not her past.

Y'all should stop behaving like the guy is some kind of undeserving monster cause he is actually the one at the wrong end of the stick

.

well, i won't presume to lay blame on who's done right or wrong, we all have our points of view that vary greatly but for the future's sake, i would advice that unless you are sure that the person in question can handle it, never ever give such info to your guy. Are you crazy? no man wants to have it at the back of his head that his wife is capable of cheating on him ( which you are, i am sorry to say, cos you did sleep with your ex while having a fiance). I don't blame the guy, he will never ever forget, it's his ego and pride in question at the end of the day, you know. The minute you did it with your ex, you disrespected your fiance, big time. Though, I hope for your sake that he does reconsider, but in my opinion, don't keep your hopes up.