@poster

u are a fool . . .who told u that the Nigerian girl wouldnt have cut some shows along the line ? AND YET You PROLLY MIGHT TELL US SHE IS A VIRGIN !!! 

u didnt bother to tell us how she has been coping for 5 years, and all of sudden u came here brandishing new found wealth that yorubas would phrase isale oro l'egbin     and u feel ALL WOULD BE WELL !  

well . . .I don't think u really need our advice because u claim to love the Canadian more . . . .Marry her, then stylishly hook your girl here with some yankee returnee that will promise her heaven and earth, make promises of bringing New York to her parents' abode  - - - -REMEMBER, ITS SUPPOSED TO BE A SET-UP O . . .THEN CAPITALISE ON THAT TO PUT ASSUNDER TO UR RELATIONSHIP !!!!

God forgive me   

Marry the White woman. cuz u guys have been together more and you can be your self

its going to be hard but dump the naija girl, she will get over it, we all have had our share of disappointments in the past and at a point in our lives we jst accept things as they are.

yes, what u did wasnt exactly nice cuz u wld have easily dumped the naija one by phone cuz i had the same experience with my ex and i dont blame him , maybe i feel he wasted my time a little but i felt i had to respect the fact that he had the nerve to tell me, in this case i was the one abroad.

so hey, simple, whats the worse that can happen? the naija gils swears for you? Big deal, accept ur wrongs and move on

the oyibo one would be hurt if u leave her and its obvious u are crazy about her so why not just stick to her?

Finally, Guy, We all make decisions that can either make or break us, next time think deeply before u act.

Some guys just dump their girls anyway or some girls even find out their men are married, truth is this women move on. Love hurts but we just Love love love

A lot of guys that travel overseas marry white women because they were "there for them when they were down and out". That's what white girls do. They pick up strays and feed them against better judgement a lot of the time ! . Its their makeup. (no pun is intended here ejo.)
There's something about 'loving' someone because of what they can provide. men are usually humble when they have nothing. You are their everything then. When he starts making money will his white girl still have his allegiance? she will be startled to discover not. Dont want another thread by another dissapointed white girl.

Search your heart n marry whom u feel you love n will be able to love forever,, since u r planning a life with the white girl then go for it, but remember a lot of white women cheat, as for the naija girl, how sure r u that she was faithful after all you weren't, but if she was then you are in big trouble,
ultimately you are doomed both ways.

I’m sure you had every intention of marrying the Nigeria girl. . .but things change, people change and  often times because of the situation they find themselves.  No one can fault you for being human.

I’m sure you thought by not telling the Nigerian girl anything, you were protecting her, maybe you even convinced yourself that one day, you will go back for her. . .that’s also human and I guess no one fault you for that either.

Now that you know what you want and please don’t say you don’t, it’s time to man up and do what has to be done. Call the Nigeria girl, be upfront with her and please for the love of all that is holy, prepare yourself for and if possible apologise after ^{(I highly recommend this)} any and every insult she throws at you. It’s only human that she curses you from here till kingdom come. . .you can’t fault her for that.

Best of luck

spoilt:

A lot of guys that travel overseas marry white women because they were "there for them when they were down and out". That's what white girls do. They pick up strays and feed them against better judgement a lot of the time ! . Its their makeup. (no pun is intended here ejo.)
There's something about 'loving' someone because of what they can provide. men are usually humble when they have nothing. You are their everything then. When he starts making money will his white girl still have his allegiance? she will be startled to discover not. Dont want another thread by another dissapointed white girl.

sorry but thats false.

Oh one more thing. . .please, please, please, don't even think of marrying her out of pity. That's worse than being dumped. . .I'm sure she'd rather be single than be married because you feel sorry for her.

Just marry the white girl.

You have totally wasted the life of the Nigerian one but save her any more time wasting and dump her.
You love the white lady more so wheres the confusion?

@ poster it's obvious you don't love the Naija girl anymore what you have for her is called pity.
That is not a requirement for a marriage foundation.
I advise you call her over the phone and let her know so she can move on as quickly as possible because you've wasted her time enough.
The girl obviously has character,I don't think I would have been patiently waiting on any fiance that long when there are many fishes in the ocean
Love does fade sometimes,yours obviously has and thank God you're not married yet.

As long as one has not said "I do" you can pull out whenever you're not feeling it anymore.

Marry your oyibo woman if you love her.
you deserve to marry someone you love

Love is all that matters

4 Him:

sorry but thats false.

ok oh!
no need to apologize. I just seem to be lending my narrow shoulders to too many chicks to cry on these days. I don tire. For the last time fending for a man will not guarantee you his love.period. [s]maybe for a while till he gets on his feet. Then you'll know what's up.[/s]

same ol same ol story.

he'll marry the white girl like so many others have done before him.

They'll have maybe one kid and then after he's firmly on his feet with either papers or employment, he'll start picking quarrels with her and vice versa.

They separate, but even before then he'll travel to Nigeria and ask his relatives to find him a young wife.

Both the Naija girl and the white lady are going to get screwed by this guy. The question is which one gets dumped first. But he'll at least have one or two kids with the white girlfriend before the leopard's spots start showing. 

I don't mean to sound cynical but I've heard this story so many times. In fact, I heard a new spin on the same situation barely three weeks ago. Involving a non-Nigerian guy though.

My friend back in Nigeria: her married relative came home from Canada displaying his biracial kid's picture. At the same time he asked my friend to help him find a Nigerian wife from home/their area. Preferably one of her own friends who she could vouch for.

Its the economy that makes people like this, I guess.

[s]he didnt say anything about the lady's physical features.[/s] I know some guys here will have started salivating, thinking the dude don land beauty queen with sexy coca cola bottle shape. Supportive, seductive, and fulfilling all fantasies. Like all these fancy pictures of porn stars some people like posting on Nairaland. Dream on, folks.

there is nothing 2 be confused about. pick a girl and marry. think about what marriage is a bout its for better for worst. when u were worst the 9ja chick took u d way u were oooo. but the white chick couldnt datz y she pimped u up. so if u take her 2 d village tomorrow. she will rather wanna pimped the whole village up, jst because she has the money, n u call it help. infact i can take this to another level oooo



she is not accepting u d way u are. datz y some of our traditions are lost. the white came, and used their money and all to change everything, and most of us call it help.

Go with the white lady. You will have less problems. Long distance marriage doesn't work. Love is color-blind.

@Naja Haje
wetin?
i just dey give advice for the guy.FYI, i cant be in that situation. too smart for all these jagba jantis

@MC
lmao! dont mind the guy. im sure he wants us to believe the 9ja gurl did not shag anybody while he was away.
the boi na odesco!

@Nana
where u dey since? acada no let you remember ur pally again
hope ure gud? whts gud wiv lamidebaby?
u aint doing ur job at all. imme sign up wiv someone else if u dont fix this schitzo quickly
enjoy

You make Naija men coming abroad look bad. You are a true disappointment, shey you know. I was long distance with my fiancee for 2 years before we married and we made it work,  you should pray that you don't fall too hard if this all backfires on you.you need to BE A MAN and tell her since you know you love white woman, be fair to Naija woman so she can move on. She is getting old waiting for your no good self!!! 

Sad

marry for love not pity,else your life will be a piece of s, t ,to all,out of sight could very much well mean out of mind let's get practical,environment and the very circumstance at the very time has a lot to do with the whole thing.hence don't ever promise anything you know you can not guarantee.my personal experience

.

There is one man I know who is a doctor and he is engaged for quite sometime to this Nigerian lady back home. Meanwhile he is three years with a white lady here why is this? becuase she helps him of course. How do you know that the white lady will even marry you? if you have plans of using her for papers (like most) just use her then, and keep your nigerian lady there also and when you sort yourself out you can sort her out alongside.

Thats what may happen to me because Im not Nigerian and let me tell you at least I can say Im prepared for it. What about ladies that are not prepared for this? getting kicked to the curb all of a sudden. Suit yourself like most would do. Marry the oyibo and have virgin Ngozie waiting patiently.

On a serious note, i really dont know, you know what you have in your mind.

But what I can say also is you might think that white ladies are easy going etc etc ie let their husband out to nightclubs and bars and go out by themselves. Not all are like this. When it comes to cooking and cleaning etc you know you will most likely have to share all that. White women will not let themselves be treated like a doormat thats how these mixed marriages dont work in the end.

well guy to be candid i tink its only wise that u marry the white lady,
ur naija babe if she is treu to her self would have realised that there has been someone there all this while,
no make mistake marry them two, cos it wont help your case.
the naija girl may pretend to understand about the white girl for a while, but eventualy she will deff ask for more.
the white girl sounds nice to me, and tink about all the help u have recieved from both her and her family, more so i u dump her then u are also one of them nigerians tarnishing our image out there.

just call this naija girl and tell her the situation of things, no amount of monetary compesation can hlp so just be sincere to her.

for me sha i don marry the white finish. ur parents no go leave with any of ur choice so no let thier decision influence u.

Obviously 80% of pple are saying marry the white lady.

so hey, simple, whats the worse that can happen? the naija gils swears for you? Big deal, accept your wrongs and move on
the oyibo one would be hurt if u leave her and its obvious u are crazy about her so why not just stick to her?

Finally, Guy, We all make decisions that can either make or break us, next time think deeply before u act.

Swearing on someone no be small thing o

I really, really feel sorry for the naija. Wasn't her fault that she was not able to be there for u when u needed help, afterall u know from the start that its neva so easy when u go abroad . . besides am not sure u were kicked from nigeria into canada . . it was all ur choice.

Either way, one of this women is gonna get cut deeply.

Remember . . "KARMA"S A B*T*H!!

well in my own thinking, i think u shd go 4 d one u really LOVE, coz wen we're talking of LOVE it's nt an easy thing and wen u're talking about marriage this is evalasting issue, so think well anyway

Guy,

Chop for here, chop for there, food don finisss

Your mind is made up on this already. ~Apz the naija angel wld be the one to pay aftall she's not of too much benefit to u atm is she?

U had to do wht u had to do to survive and out of fear u hid ur secret and honestly cant blame u to savin ur back but then it wasnt the best fin to do.

do wht u hv to do but remember wht goes round comes around and hop tht you get away wv it. But guy, you try O, shd hv seen al of these comin and mayb tel the naija girl to find her level since u love the oyibo more.

None of them obviously deserves to be hurt, they'v both been gud but I'm not to say if u dzv them or not, life is such tht we can only love our neighbours as we love ourself not more than we love ourself

To those who fink the dude shd be crucified, you'd hop neva to be in his position cz u probably do the same.

Pity all I see here's stuff about the naija girl having been gettin her groove on while the the poster's been away. something none of us can substantiate not even the poster himself. Is there even a remote possibility dt she's been faithful to him? I guess faithfulness' suddenly become either a crime or pretty much old fashioned.
. . . and for those sayin the white girl picked him from the gutters, i don't exactly believe he was all that when his behind was right here in naija so what's the fuss all about? both met him as a nobody.
I'm not against his goin with the white girl if she's the one he truly loves now or at least envisages a secure future with (whatever rocks his world) but he'd betta be careful how he handles the folks at home cs there's a way they can call him back o! . . . by remote control unless we're not dealing with yoruba folks here.

tkb417:

@Nana
where u dey since? acada no let you remember your pally again
hope ure good? whts good with lamidebaby?
u aint doing your job at all. imme sign up with someone else if u don't fix this schitzo quickly
enjoy

conspiracy!

@ 4him

pls how dyu figure the white gurl is better? because of wat she sacrificed? afterall she gave everything with her own free will!!
just because she did that it means her love is purer? becuse she threw money into the equation?

the person in question diddnt state but did he ever mention the nigerian girl was only interested in money for herself and her family? did he ever mention the white gurl loved him more than the naiga girl? of course the white girl did a lot but how do u know if it wasnt the other way round the naija girl wouldnt have done the same? he never condemned her so u cant either.


money comes money goes but time can never go back! of course not findin another person is not an ideal reason for marriage YES. but dont u think she herself has sacrificed as well? time?? waiting for one person trying to be hopefull everday even though you dont know what the person is doing at the time? do you know how much courage and patience that takes?

If he came back the way he left she would have still embraced him with open arms as she loved him even before he had anything!
after patiently waiting her 'FIANCE' has returned with a little somthing cant she as well REAP were she has sown?

this is a difficult decison obviously and i gave my suggestion on who he should pick but none of the ladies are at fault. how can u be so quick to condemn the naija gilr and brand her a gold digger??

@Nana
see what u have caused. Chei!!!

@lamide
**ahem**
i can explain. . .or better still, Nana will explain berra

What this guy need is an advice and not all this blame !blame !!blame !!!blame, Well my man u need God intervention the mistake u made is that u suppose 2 have tel the white girl the whole truth, i mean concerning ur relationship's with the nigger girl, and if truly is God sent lady she we help u and even she may not require any friendship. Plz cal ur parents and tel them the truth

God We see u true

@ Poster,

U are really not a serious person. Why did u not just break up with the Naija chic shortly after u met the canadian? well, e don happen. But i honestly cant imagine why u would want to consider marrying our sister after you have been away for so long. do u still know her? marriage is not supposed to have expiry date so choose the one that will give u joy and happiness. abi u wit the naija chic go okija shrine before u travel? . make up ur mind bro

I COMPLETELY AND 100% AGREE WITH 4 HIM. Now thats a good and resonable advise which you should follow. Besides, you said you like the White lady so go for her dude! Dont think twice and dont look back, just go for her. And I think it is very important to be yourself infront of that person, not to fake it out cause in a long term relationship, she will know your true colours eventually,