LaShawn:

He called me one day and told me he had sent me 25k. I thanked him. He encouraged me to use it that after all, a student like me would have things to do with money. I left the money alone, However.

Months Later, I had to go home. That night the guy called me. I was watching television with my Dad, and my Dad didn't know his daughter was back to talking with the man he specicefically warned not to talk to anymore.

After two rings, I went outside to received the call. Next thing, he was shouting at me and accusing me that I didnt pick his calls Because of the I.diots I am packing around who are deceiving me that I am beautiful. He then told me that there was money he sent to me (the 25k). He quoted the date he sent it for me. He told me that he wanted it back and he didn't want any excuse. He dropped the call on me, But not before a slew of insults which included bullshIt, amongst others. Early in the morning I got a text and while I have Since deleted it, I can Never forget the words:

"I am still expecting my...
Don't get ready, live ready."


I sent the lunatics money back, as I Never spent a dime.

Lol! This guy is good! What a set up!

I hope you have finally squelched all thoughts of ever going back to him? You know he hasn't changed. He just wants his most 'successful' relationship back.

Any man that really gets close to me would know I have an army of brothers and male cousins. He wouldn't even dare! No one does! Unless he wants to be buried alive.

Love gbakwaa oku.

This is why a dump any guy that merely abuses me verbally, cos it usually starts from there.

I used to think I was being too hard on them, but this thread and the singles seminar's discussion I listened to have shown me i'm doing the right thing.

LaShawn:

My dear. I don't think I can ever listen to man saying sit at home, while I work..That singular incident thought me a lot of lessons that I won't forget anytime soon.
I work now and I earn a good salary, as far as I am concerned, I'll put that job first before a lot of people Because people are fickle and wicked. I'll only be with a guy who can understand that a woman is not to end up in the kitchen. She should be able to flourish and maintain her own dignity, not be asking for money to buy matches and pad.

My MIL told my three years old daughter that women are to be seen not heard! I told her boo-boo,its a lie. Please don't listen to that. Can you imagine!

vivianc: Any man that really gets close to me would know I have an army of brothers and male cousins. He wouldn't even dare! No one does! Unless he wants to be buried alive.

Love gbakwaa oku.

This is why a dump any guy that merely abuses me verbally, cos it usually starts from there.

I used to think I was being too hard on them, but this thread and the singles seminar's discussion I listened to have shown me i'm doing the right thing.

You are doing the right thing my dear. No time to waste with cavemen.

ileobatojo:

Lol! This guy is good! What a set up!

I hope you have finally squelched all thoughts of ever going back to him? You know he hasn't changed. He just wants his most 'successful' relationship back.

Yes oh. I will Never go back. Forward ever, backward Never.
I think I just needed someone to talk to. That was why I opened the other thread. Not like I really meant to go back...
And Thank God I saw the support group I needed right here.

swag queen:


My MIL told my three years old daughter that women are to be seen not heard! I told her boo-boo,its a lie. Please don't listen to that. Can you imagine!

Hmmn. Thank goodness you were there to tell her otherwise. Such mentality in this day and age....

LaShawn: @Uredaddy

And I won't be surprised if your husband had a hand in your ex's wife calling and accusing you. I don't put anything past those people. They set you up and then work on your guilt yo start abusing you.

A friend of mine started receiving anonymous texts after She got married. The texts were explicit, talking of How the sender supposedly slept with her, the different positions he used on her etcetera. She told me She showed her husband. Because She didn't want anyone to blackmail her..That is How a trusting relationship should be like.

You and I know that we can Never open up like that to these abusive men. They turn around and use the info against you.

Wow! All these men come from the same planet!

One day,i received a call from a particular number on my private line. I'll answer and the other person wouldn't say anything. My husband travelled and i called him and told him. He asked for the number and i gave it to him. He later called and said the person wasn't saying anything either.

Then an sms came and it read "can i talk to you?"
I replied and asked "who are you?"
He said " k.c" (my ex's name)
I replied "which k.c?"
He wrote "your k.c"

I just replied in a very angry tone that "please I'm a happily married woman and I'm not ready for all these hanky panky games. Btw,who gave you my private number?"
And he just replied "sorry o". And that was it. I knew it was my husband because unfortunately for him,he sent it to my private line!

Days later,he came back and as we were chatting,he told me that he trusts me more now and he's sure i won't cheat on him!

Of course i called K.C and he said he did not call me as he doesn't know my number! Just imagine what would have happened if i had entertained any discussion with k.c. I can't even imagine it!

See how petty they can be!

Na waooo! Insecurities and cowardice! I have an aunt the brother inlaw used to beat up because her husband is late. She hid it for a long time from my her brothers because the man was of financial help to her. The day my dad and her brothers heard, chei!, it was like a third world war. They marched into the man's compound, dragged him out and gave him a very stern and serious warning. You can imagine having three huge tall men walk into your house very early in the morning with actions. That was the last time he laid his filthy hands on my aunt.
I live my dad's family cos they believe in action.
They ensured their sister was financially set up, thus, she became independent and free from the wolf of a brother in law.

@swag queen
Me, I see these men as being sick. Because they exhibit the same symptoms. From America, to India, to Nigeria. Different men, different races But all having the same identical character. Just like the symptoms of malaria is universal, so also are the behaviors of abusive men the same the world over.
Derin did almost same by making his friends call me. My former roomie also experienced same in the hands of her then boyfriend, now husband. He called her and pretended he was her ex.

@ uredaddy, your story brings tears to my eyes. Pls u have to be strong for your kids.
What are your plans right now?

Am in tears already. Uredaddy,God is ur strength.
I know your testimony is on the way.

Financial independence is the key. Its easy to point accusing fingers to people dependent on you wen things dnt go as planned.

@swag queen
Me, I see these men as being sick. Because they exhibit the same symptoms. From America, to India, to Nigeria. Different men, different races But all having the same identical character. Just like the symptoms of malaria is universal, so also are the behaviors of abusive men the same the world over.
Derin did almost same by making his friends call me. My former roomie also experienced same in the hands of her then boyfriend, now husband. He called her and pretended he was her ex.
@swag queen
Me, I see these men as being sick. Because they exhibit the same symptoms. From America, to India, to Nigeria. Different men, different races But all having the same identical character. Just like the symptoms of malaria is universal, so also are the behaviors of abusive men the same the world over.
Derin did almost same by making his friends call me. My former roomie also experienced same in the hands of her then boyfriend, now husband. He called her and pretended he was her ex.

I think a GENDER VANGUARD group needs to be set up all over the country to help such women......

The foundation of every child is very important and that is the reasons behind this issue of rapes,abuses,molestation...i strongly advise parents to show a lot of LOVE and CARE towards their wards,please view this interview - http://boomoffice.com/interviews/henz-play-house/

Uredaddy:

Thank you.

I am glad you read my post and you already have planned to do some of the things I advised
The same things the other ladies are saying.
I'm also glad your siblings are hotheaded.that is a big asset here
They must know what is going on,I don't advise they hurt him but he should hear from them
Like someone earlier said,the moment this man realizes you have the full support of your family,he will cower down
He kept you away from your dad till he died and nobody challenged him
Water don pass garri now
All the tactics of getting him to back off you is to buy you time to finish your education and get a job
I advised the lawyer swag queen to get a job and be free,same thing for you.
Get your education,get a job and if he continues,you step
If there is a trusted older lady in your neighborhood or church,tell her
If you go to a church together tell the pastor and his wife,he may run away from that church,let him
Tell it all
Do not hide in shame any longer

No more dying in silence
Tell people that he is frustrating your education plans
That is one big line you need to hammer on
I assure you everyone will come down on him for that and he will have no choice but let you
He needs to hear people tell him how despicable it is to beat a woman

And if you ever decide to leave please do not make the mistake of leaving your kids behind.
The step mother or his girlfriends will use them as boi boi and feed them rotten food

Somebody should please help contact my friend, schooled with her in China long time ago. She knows my abusive relationship and she is the only one who can help me get out of here please. I can't log in here that much as he monitoring me more than before
She is... . Tell her you contacting her on behaf of...

kenyattamoore: Somebody should please help contact my friend, schooled with her in China long time ago. She knows my abusive relationship and she is the only one who can help me get out of here please. I can't log in here that much as he monitoring me more than before
She is Imane. Tell her you contacting her on behaf of Malikiyah (me)
+8615220010794

Where are from and where are your parents or siblings or any family member you can go to
I know you say you are in Zanzibar but where is your home or your closest safe home near your people
Where does Imani live,can you get to her place?
How much will it take you to get there?
I will plead with the women and men on this thread to raise money for you to leave him in 48 hours and get to that destination
Please answer

kenyattamoore: Somebody should please help contact my friend, schooled with her in China long time ago. She knows my abusive relationship and she is the only one who can help me get out of here please. I can't log in here that much as he monitoring me more than before
She is Imane. Tell her you contacting her on behaf of Malikiyah (me)
+8615220010794

post other forms of contact apart from this incase this one fails .....and also it will help cry out the urgency...like mail, and anyother social network....

Kenyatta Moore I was pretty tough on you because I don't know what is holding you
You are not married to the man
You have no kids
You lived on your own and despite the abuse you moved in with him
You have not contacted your parents,you tell us you have no phone and can't find anyone,not even a stranger to call them
Are there no public phone phone service in Zanzibar
Then I read you say your family situation is complicated
I ask again,where can you run to this minute

kenyattamoore: Somebody should please help contact my friend, schooled with her in China long time ago. She knows my abusive relationship and she is the only one who can help me get out of here please. I can't log in here that much as he monitoring me more than before
She is Imane. Tell her you contacting her on behaf of Malikiyah (me)
+8615220010794

SPOKE WITH YOUR FRIEND NOW AND SHE SAID SHE'LL CONTACT YOUR FAMILY RIGHT AWAY!
Apparently, she didn't know things are this bad for you!
Hopefully, we should be able to help you here but sweetie, something has to be done!
Your friend is willing to help, i'll call her later in the day to get a feedback!
Stay blessed, dear!

IF ANYBODY WANTS ME TO ASK FOR ANYTHING FROM IMANE, KINDLY SAY SO, PLEASE!
SHOULD I JUST ASK HER FOR HER PARENT'S CONTACTS, DIDN'T WANT TO SOUND SUSPICIOUS TO IMANE, DT'S WHY I DIDN'T ASK HER ABOUT THE NUMBER!

alutacontinua:

SPOKE WITH YOUR FRIEND NOW AND SHE SAID SHE'LL CONTACT YOUR FAMILY RIGHT AWAY!
Apparently, she didn't know things are this bad for you!
Hopefully, we should be able to help you here but sweetie, something has to be done!
Your friend is willing to help, i'll call her later in the day to get a feedback!
Stay blessed, dear!

Bless you
Her case is pretty straightforward IMHO unless she is bound in chains

Imagine, my heart is already pounding..like she is in some kind of trouble.....baba God, take control o.

Cathaliya: Imagine, my heart is already pounding..like she is in some kind of trouble.....baba God, take control o.

It looks as if the beast locked her up. This is so painful...*sad*

Thanks a lot is a very good friend she is like family to me,she will know what to do.I have a student visa in my passport as I didnt complete my program ,will go back and live there with her.
my mother is already dead and my father is an irresponsible man he cant do somethin ,that why I ask to help me contact my friend.My abuser been takin care of me all this time.he is the one who payeds my skool fees in china and one day he said i should stop and go live here in zanzibar.

alutacontinua:

SPOKE WITH YOUR FRIEND NOW AND SHE SAID SHE'LL CONTACT YOUR FAMILY RIGHT AWAY!
Apparently, she didn't know things are this bad for you!
Hopefully, we should be able to help you here but sweetie, something has to be done!
Your friend is willing to help, i'll call her later in the day to get a feedback!
Stay blessed, dear!

IF ANYBODY WANTS ME TO ASK FOR ANYTHING FROM IMANE, KINDLY SAY SO, PLEASE!
SHOULD I JUST ASK HER FOR HER PARENT'S CONTACTS, DIDN'T WANT TO SOUND SUSPICIOUS TO IMANE, DT'S WHY I DIDN'T ASK HER ABOUT THE NUMBER!

Kenyatta can you tell aluta where you are located
Street and house number so she can relate that and the exact condition u are in at this moment to your friend and subsequently family.
This maybe that moment u have been waiting for

he is not beat me again since last time but he does not let me breeth anymore,he is been showing fake love but in my heart I know he will beat me again thats why I jist want to go ,am tired.

WinnieDPooh: It looks as if the beast locked her up. This is so painful...*sad*

Is there no Human rights agency closeby that can be contacted?

Jeez, I hate being so disturbed and am not sure I will be fine until I know she is fine.

kenyattamoore: Thanks a lot ,Imane is a very good friend she is like family to me,she will know what to do.I have a student visa in my passport as I didnt complete my program ,will go back and live there with her.
my mother is already dead and my father is an irresponsible man he cant do somethin ,that why I ask to help me contact my friend.My abuser been takin care of me all this time.he is the one who payeds my skool fees in china and one day he said i should stop and go live here in zanzibar.

What exactly do you want Imane to do for you?
To contact your parents or allow you to come stay with her?
Is she also in Zanzibar?
Where exactly is she?
How far is she from you?
She seems like a nice person who is willing to help, give us enough info to be able to help you.
This operation cannot afford to fail cos if it should, i can assure you that man is gonna fry you alive. You need to get this straight without him suspecting anything!

GOODLUCK!

babyosisi:
Kenyatta can you tell aluta where you are located
Street and house number so she can relate that and the exact condition u are in at this moment to your friend and subsequently family.
This maybe that moment u have been waiting for

ie knows everything that y I say she knows what to do,its just that I cant call her from here now.she advised me not to come here but i was too much on love to listen to her.

kenyattamoore: he is not beat me again since last time but he does not let me breeth anymore,he is been showing fake love but in my heart I know he will beat me again thats why I jist want to go ,am tired.

Please dont be deceived by any of his fake affection and remorse just leave i beg you. Thanks

kenyattamoore: he is not beat me again since last time but he does not let me breeth anymore,he is been showing fake love but in my heart I know he will beat me again thats why I jist want to go ,am tired.

Can you get out of the house to make phone calls yourself to your friend?
Do you have money to make that phone call?
Please answer
You need a game plan
That is what separates you from the other stories
You have no game plan
You need one
Let us help you get one
If you say you can go out and make a call and you can get to a western union tell me
In a few hrs at my lunch time I will send you money to go make that call

I want her to send me online airticket ,she is in china

alutacontinua:

What exactly do you want Imane to do for you?
To contact your parents or allow you to come stay with her?
Is she also in Zanzibar?
Where exactly is she?
How far is she from you?
She seems like a nice person who is willing to help, give us enough info to be able to help you.
This operation cannot afford to fail cos if it should, i can assure you that man is gonna fry you alive. You need to get this straight without him suspecting anything!

GOODLUCK!