Chillisauce:

My friend stop chasing me, does my moniker give you e rection? WTF!

Pls, I'm taken, move along and get yourself useful?

I am making myself very useful
Sorry, I am not looking for a full complete Nigerian women, You have to have thing different
I am very happy with my life, I have a great wife

Chillisauce:

And you are

since my Ex and her family wanted to take advantage, i changed gear and am focusing on making more £££££, cant be bother

clapham:
@ chillisauce
enough of 9ja babe,both home and abroad,am single but not searching tho
oshaa is the best

Please open yourself to all type of women
Don't listen to any person that tell you to marry Nigerian woman
You can meet all type of good women of any color and race

clapham:
since my Ex and her family wanted to take advantage, i changed gear and am focusing on making more £££££, cant be bother

And you think I'm interested in your story because.....

2ndChance:
I miraculously survived some suspicious "kpokiyo" as you put it early last year It's still a mystery to everone including me how I survived it Not saying my wife or mother-in-law is responsible ooo just saying what happened last year o

Even so, why wouldn't she just give you a bigger dose of the kpokiyo for improved chances the second time? Why waste a year and her own money building a house when all she needs to do is to triple the dose?

clapham:
since my Ex and her family wanted to take advantage, i changed gear and am focusing on making more £££££, cant be bother

Dude she is going to be asking for some pounds very soon
Real Nigeria woman
Please keep moving

am not here to table down any story nor looking to catch a fish,there are many fishes already in the sea

am not "olu maintain - story of my life"

when you have too many,there is table of preference, choice etc

Chillisauce:

And you think I'm interested in your story because.....

I bet you are not interested in his story
but You are very interested in his pounds
Nobody trying to hit on you
you just acting like a BI

2ndChance: I have confronted her already and she went down on her kneels begging for forgiveness immediately. But then, trust once lost is difficult to gain back in a relationship. So even though I have forgiven her, I really don't trust her any longer because I now have this strong feeling that she has some unterior motives. I have also confronted the Priest too and he was speechless and in shock as to how I manage to find out.
As for the paternity issue, I have no doubt the children are mine as they are my carbon copies both the male and female ones. Besides, where I hail from, I would have been a dead man by now if I wasn't the biological father of my children. So, that's sorted.

She's begging because you found out rite? What if u hadnt found out??. I would go for a paternity test regardless to blunt her arrogance and to put in her check. Trust is earned not given!

GoodFaith:
I bet you are not interested in his story
but You are very interested in his pounds
Nobody trying to hit on you
you just acting like a BI

I guess ya mama and your wife are BI!

Why not use your tiny e rection to mount on them
Since you got no job yet.

Chillisauce:

I guess ya mama and your wife are BI!

Why not use your tiny e rection to mount on them
Since you got no job yet.

You just found out what a BI is?
If you are not one but you are acting like one
So change attitude and be a lady

GoodFaith:
You just found out what a BI is?
If you are not one but you are acting like one
So change attitude and be a lady

So you mounted on your BI mother and wife yet ...

Fvcking he- goat

When men acts and talk like women,it irritates me.

Chillisauce:
So you mounted on your BI mother and wife yet ...

Fvcking he- goat

You are not a lady but a kid
Grow up
If you are a lady please act like one
I am done

GoodFaith:
You are not a lady but a kid
Grow up
If you are a lady please act like one

Even he-goat thinks he knows what being a lady entails.

I guess I used the language you understand. Fvcking nkpi.

@goodfaith, whatever you are sending to my nairaland mailbox, you are on your own. I don't do PM. Not to talk of a dimwit like you.

Adieu

@OP I can understand your feelings, I had a similar experience and it has not been easy. Mine was a situation whereby before we got married I gave my apartment and only car to my wife (then still girlfriend) to live and cruise around while I worked at site and came home periodically.
I made sure she was very confortable with my income as she was earning very little till we got married and we continued to live well as a family and me trying to be the best husband.
Then things started changing when she got a job that paid her well and provided opportunity for things like loans and estacode allowances while my profile has remained almost the same in my work place (yearly small percentage increment)

To my chagrin I got to find out she was paying for a house in an estate with her maiden name and to rub salt into injury she bought a new car and registered it in her maiden name also without informing me. It got so bad that she no longer shows me any respect and I kept feeling miserable in my situation making every effort to work harder and achieve morethan her and in the process even lost more money due to failed investment.
Got sick and went to the hospital and was informed that my BP was getting high and when my family heard it they were apprehensive and I had to open up to them what I was facing.
I had to abandon my home for her for some period and went to a different location to live with a very nice friend of mine to try and get my BP down and think of way forward.
Her mother has realy being a bad influence on her as she was the one who encouraged her to take the actions she took. Following intervention and for the sake of our children I returned home even without her acknowledging that what she did was wrong.
I have tried to swallow the humilation which is what you are also going through now.

I wish I could boast of your achievements listed, but I have little to show even though I have worked so hard and the story around is that I am envious of my wife achievement and her money (but thats not true). Seems like no one wants to know how I feel inside. I can guess the area that your wife comes from as this is rampant among women from that area.
I grew up in the North where you learn to take issues of money and wealth with gentility but she grew up in their area where a lot of emphasis is placed on money and wealth.

Please dont allow yourself to get sick cause of worrying about her action as that may be deadly, remove your mind from her actions and focus it on your children, business and faith, dont worry about the Priests action as he may have acted innocently or even if it is intentional.
You can take a break from the house and go visit a different location for a short vacation to allow for things to cool down.
I hope she comes back to her senses which is also my wish in my own family and keep praying for God to intervene in your situation. Good luck.

when your mother in law is against you , it is time to say good bye to the marriage . because women will always follow their mother like ..........................

Guyman02: @OP I can understand your feelings, I had a similar experience and it has not been easy. Mine was a situation whereby before we got married I gave my apartment and only car to my wife (then still girlfriend) to live and cruise around while I worked at site and came home periodically.
I made sure she was very confortable with my income as she was earning very little till we got married and we continued to live well as a family and me trying to be the best husband.
Then things started changing when she got a job that paid her well and provided opportunity for things like loans and estacode allowances while my profile has remained the same in my work place.

To my chagrin I got to find out she was paying for a house in an estate with her maiden name and to rub salt into injury she bought a new car and registered it in her maiden name also. It got so bad that she no longer shows me any respect and I kept feeling miserable in my situation making efforts to work harder and achieve morethan her and in the process lost more money due to failed investment.
I went to the hospital and was informed that my BP was getting high and when my family had it they were apprehensive and I had to open up to them.
I had to abandon my home for her for months and went to a different location to live with a very nice friend of mine to try and get my BP down.
Her mother was realy a bad influence on her as she was the one who encouraged her to take the action she did. Following intervention and for the sake of our children I returned home even without her acknowledging that what she did was wrong.
I have tried to swallow the humilation which is what you are also going through now.

I wish I could boast of your achievements, but I have little to show even though I have worked so hard and the story around is that I am jealous of my wife and her money (but thats not through). Seems like no one wants to know how I feel inside. I can guess the area that your wife comes from as this is rampant among women from that area.
I grew up in the North where you learn to take issues of money with gentility but she grew up in their area where a lot of emphasis is placed on money and properties.

Please dont allow yourself to get sick cause of worrying about her action as that may be deadly, remove your mind from her actions and focus it on your children, business and faith, dont worry about the Priests action as he may have acted innocently or even if it is intentional.
You can take a break from the house and go visit a different location for a short vacation to allow for things to cool down.
I hope she comes back to her senses which is also my wish in my own family and keep praying for God to intervene in your situation. Good luck.

Dude, I am not sure how old you are but you can still make it
Keep working hard and pray the Lord will come through for you

Menh kasala don box,scene don set for NL
i pick race

[quote author=GoodFaith]
Dude, I am not sure how old you are but you can still make it
Keep working hard and pray the Lord will come through for you[/quote

Thank you, I appreciate your encouraging words!

GoodFaith:
Dude, I am not sure how old you are but you can still make it
Keep working hard and pray the Lord will come through for you

i can imagine what that guy is passing through , and i have always told people , if it isnt working just back out , the greatest disappointment in life is to know that your wife is banging someone else and she doesn't care if you know or not , if a woman starts seeing her man as a pest ,liability and inferior person , it is time for the man to move on .there are many women out there that will give and show you love and respect, but living under the same roof with someone you are not happy with and who is constantly showing it to you is debasing and degrading . and sooner or later she will start dating other men outside because as far as she is concerned they are the ones that can give her joy. women dont realize the magnitude of this mistake or attitude until their mothers that pushed them dies or when they reach the age of 50 or late 40s . that is the period they will ned a companion , the major reason why there are many sugar mummies in Nigeria and other countries ,
life is short never allow a woman to make ur life miserable , just move on

Guyman02: @OP I can understand your feelings, I had a similar experience and it has not been easy. Mine was a situation whereby before we got married I gave my apartment and only car to my wife (then still girlfriend) to live and cruise around while I worked at site and came home periodically.
I made sure she was very confortable with my income as she was earning very little till we got married and we continued to live well as a family and me trying to be the best husband.
Then things started changing when she got a job that paid her well and provided opportunity for things like loans and estacode allowances while my profile has remained almost the same in my work place (yearly small percentage increment)

To my chagrin I got to find out she was paying for a house in an estate with her maiden name and to rub salt into injury she bought a new car and registered it in her maiden name also without informing me. It got so bad that she no longer shows me any respect and I kept feeling miserable in my situation making every effort to work harder and achieve morethan her and in the process even lost more money due to failed investment.
Got sick and went to the hospital and was informed that my BP was getting high and when my family heard it they were apprehensive and I had to open up to them what I was facing.
I had to abandon my home for her for some period and went to a different location to live with a very nice friend of mine to try and get my BP down and think of way forward.
Her mother has realy being a bad influence on her as she was the one who encouraged her to take the actions she took. Following intervention and for the sake of our children I returned home even without her acknowledging that what she did was wrong.
I have tried to swallow the humilation which is what you are also going through now.

I wish I could boast of your achievements listed, but I have little to show even though I have worked so hard and the story around is that I am envious of my wife achievement and her money (but thats not true). Seems like no one wants to know how I feel inside. I can guess the area that your wife comes from as this is rampant among women from that area.
I grew up in the North where you learn to take issues of money and wealth with gentility but she grew up in their area where a lot of emphasis is placed on money and wealth.

Please dont allow yourself to get sick cause of worrying about her action as that may be deadly, remove your mind from her actions and focus it on your children, business and faith, dont worry about the Priests action as he may have acted innocently or even if it is intentional.
You can take a break from the house and go visit a different location for a short vacation to allow for things to cool down.
I hope she comes back to her senses which is also my wish in my own family and keep praying for God to intervene in your situation. Good luck.

Thanks and God bless you. Best of luck too. Cheers.

texaco1:
i can imagine what that guy is passing through , and i have always told people , if it isnt working just back out , the greatest disappointment in life is to know that your wife is banging someone else and she doesn't care if you know or not , if a woman starts seeing her man as a pest ,liability and inferior person , it is time for the man to move on .there are many women out there that will give and show you love and respect, but living under the same roof with someone you are not happy with and who is constantly showing it to you is debasing and degrading . and sooner or later she will start dating other men outside because as far as she is concerned they are the ones that can give her joy. women dont realize the magnitude of this mistake or attitude until their mothers that pushed them dies or when they reach the age of 50 or late 40s . that is the period they will ned a companion , the major reason why there are many sugar mummies in Nigeria and other countries ,
life is short never allow a woman to make ur life miserable , just move on

I agreed with you but I am not a dude that tell people to back out of marriage
I tell people to make decision base on facts not emotion
I have lot of experience
My mom beg me not to back out
I told my mom to stop and pray for me to make the best decision that will make me happy
"women dont realize the magnitude of this mistake or attitude until their mothers that pushed them dies "
They do find out after some years

GoodFaith:
I agreed with you but I am not a dude that tell people to back out of marriage
I tell people to make decision base on facts not emotion
I have lot of experience
My mom beg me not to back out
I told my mom to stop and pray for me to make the best decision that will make me happy

this thread is not about the op only , it is about an issue that affects millions of families all around the world , we musnt look at this issue as a story about the op, back to your point , what i am saying is if there is a glimmer of hope and there is a little ray of hope that the woman can change then no problem but some women become so deaf to reasoning at the moment they are making money and they believe that with money they can live without love . marital vows is nothing to a woman that is hell bent of moving out.
if the situation can be rectified , the one may try but the moment one sees that the situation isnt redeemable , the best thing is to move out

Texaco1
You made a great point
I like to call myself a student, I do like to continuous learn from people
The experiences has help me
I have told people about my experience
Life is about learning

GoodFaith: Texaco1
You made a great point
I like to call myself a student, I do like to continuous learn from people
The experiences has help me
I have told people about my experience
Life is about learning

yes bro , it is never a pleasant experience but when you get to a point that you know you have to back out , there is never a painful feeling as that when you know you just have to back out.but when you look at your health and your life you will realize that if it is a sacrifice that you must make and a cross that you must carry for the rest of your life , a scar and wound that will never heal ,wailing that can never be appeased .
many may not know until they experience it but those that have will tell people how it is . let the op decide what he will do , it is all his choice .but the op must know that his woman will not change he must decide to wither live with her that way or ........

OP, you should be happy to have such an industrious woman in your life. I think your main problem is insecurity that your lady is doing good.
Sometimes, when a woman does such, it means "i don't trust you that much".
Women have long range thought process while men have short range.
Count your blessings and after she is done, take her out to celebrate.

jp philips:

you don't need to repeat it, i heard it the first time. most Nigerian men are useless go to hotels in owerri, ABJ and ph on a good friday nite and tell me if those men don't have wives and kids at home.

it is only the poor one that stays home with their 'wifey'
gone with the wind and beer once they start making some chicken fee

Guyman02: @OP I can understand your feelings, I had a similar experience and it has not been easy. Mine was a situation whereby before we got married I gave my apartment and only car to my wife (then still girlfriend) to live and cruise around while I worked at site and came home periodically.
I made sure she was very confortable with my income as she was earning very little till we got married and we continued to live well as a family and me trying to be the best husband.
Then things started changing when she got a job that paid her well and provided opportunity for things like loans and estacode allowances while my profile has remained almost the same in my work place (yearly small percentage increment)

To my chagrin I got to find out she was paying for a house in an estate with her maiden name and to rub salt into injury she bought a new car and registered it in her maiden name also without informing me. It got so bad that she no longer shows me any respect and I kept feeling miserable in my situation making every effort to work harder and achieve morethan her and in the process even lost more money due to failed investment.
Got sick and went to the hospital and was informed that my BP was getting high and when my family heard it they were apprehensive and I had to open up to them what I was facing.
I had to abandon my home for her for some period and went to a different location to live with a very nice friend of mine to try and get my BP down and think of way forward.
Her mother has realy being a bad influence on her as she was the one who encouraged her to take the actions she took. Following intervention and for the sake of our children I returned home even without her acknowledging that what she did was wrong.
I have tried to swallow the humilation which is what you are also going through now.

I wish I could boast of your achievements listed, but I have little to show even though I have worked so hard and the story around is that I am envious of my wife achievement and her money (but thats not true). Seems like no one wants to know how I feel inside. I can guess the area that your wife comes from as this is rampant among women from that area.
I grew up in the North where you learn to take issues of money and wealth with gentility but she grew up in their area where a lot of emphasis is placed on money and wealth.

Please dont allow yourself to get sick cause of worrying about her action as that may be deadly, remove your mind from her actions and focus it on your children, business and faith, dont worry about the Priests action as he may have acted innocently or even if it is intentional.
You can take a break from the house and go visit a different location for a short vacation to allow for things to cool down.
I hope she comes back to her senses which is also my wish in my own family and keep praying for God to intervene in your situation. Good luck.

I think you are beating yourself up over nothing. You are just hard on yourself for no reason. Honestly it is annoying. Why do you feel humiliated? Because she made a selfish decision and is not even remorseful you feel so bitter to the point that it raises your blood pressure? Please don't attend GoodFaith's pity party. Don't try to compete with your wife. Even if you double your income now it makes no difference because you doubled it for the wrong reasons. Stop tying your worth as a man to how much money you make. If you cannot be a good man with no money in your pockets you cannot be a good man with money in it. Gosh. You are empowering your wife by behaving this way. I just hope you don't look beaten down at home. That is just crazy. You hope you can boast of another man's achievements?? What do you know about him?

I truly hate this whole idea of separating income in marriage. Money is such a huge factor in marriage that as far as I am concerned it should be an open book from the beginning. It just does not work well when you separate it. Your money should have been her money from the start and her money should have been your money from the beginning. It does not mean that anyone is being controlled. It just allows for transparency. Her mother who is advising her is doing this from her own experiences as a wife when she had to ask for everything she got or depended on her husband to survive. Her foolish daughter is taking that advice forgetting that when that time comes and mom is gone she has to face her husband for the rest of her life. I am glad you went back to your house. You should never have let her behavior make you leave your home. Please work on building back your confidence. You never stopped being the man of the house simply because your wife started making more money. LOL. What if she gets fired today. She does not own the business. She is someone's employee. People are just so short sighted.

Soul_glo's
“Please don't attend GoodFaith's pity party. Don't try to compete with your wife.”

If you down, You have to get up
That is life, it is not about competition
It is about asking God to help you do better in life
Lot of people might want to see you down supporting your wife
When the lord shine the sun in the dark, There come hope
You have to have hope, if you want to get somewhere in life
There have to be a drive, You set your goals and the good lord will help you and bless you
Soul_glos, I am very blessed and I am always thankful to God

I have been following this thread since yesterday some ppl make a huge sence in their suggetions while some are talking kock shiit

how on earth would you marry a woman pay her bride price wed her do every thing together even build houses that she is awere and all of a sudden he started working and decide to build her own house without informing her husband this more than insult, men this is a deadly blow infact this lady is saying that you are no body

women are very deadly even some that are here writing when you bring them in to ur life u will see their real color, mr op start ur under ground work immediatly else they gonna take u unawere.

was it recently completed, maybe she wanted to show it to you as a surprise but couldn't have enough time to make it happen.