Double post

IFELEKE:
Do we assume the woman is guilty because the husband said so? Are we saying the fella is the absolute victim here?
Marital squabbles are always difficult to meddle in because no one knows the true picture.
My advise wasnt for him to accept fault/take the insult but for him wisely put his house in order

There is no need to dig for the autheticity of the story

Its a simple question If a woman came here with exactly the same story would your response have been the same you said No

No why is it different you are now going on about how the story might not the true

So if a woman comes here with the same story that would make hers true but doubt the mans?

Again, If a woman comes with the same story the OP did, Would your advice have been the same? That she should apologize to the man who slapped her

squaddy: quote author=nutty_hnic]

[b][/b]you need to see a psychologist to educate you about women


I guess you have a doctorate degree in that field then..

A woman is now a 6 credit load course...mtcchheeeww

nope...that guy just seem violent nd could be to women

Amaaskia:

You're calling me a fool cause I asked if he would actually hit a woman?
My asking suddenly means I preach women should hit men?



Your stupidity frightens me!

you did nt preach you did nt condem den wat is ur opinion?& you 4got to add 'SMH & SHAMELESS' on wat u said b4.my sister your foolishness made me to pity ur man

Sisi_Kill: Honestly, there are some times you read people's post and you wonder how they got so warped in their thinking. Someone talks about he was slapped down literally and figuratively speaking and people are asking if he "drops" money for soup. What the hell does that have to do with anything?!!

If he doesn't "drop" money then it is okay for his wife to keep the pot of soup from him? Is that like if a woman does not have a job, it is okay for her husband to whoop her behind on a daily basis?!!


And what is with the disbelief...Like it is so out of the realm of possibilities for a woman to be physically abusive towards her husband?!! Oh! Oh! He must have slapped her first right. . .it is just not possible for there to be an ill mannered woman out there who has no respect for herself and people.

Until we do away with these myths that men can't be abused, that abused people must have done something to deserve or they didn't do something (like drop money for food or wear sexy dresses to welcome their hubby's home from work) we will continue to get threads like this.


And the eeejits laughing at OP for not being a man, what exactly is he supposed to do to prove his manhood . . .beat his wife to a pulp?! Y'all are sick in the head.


@ OP
Get out of the house now!! She's obviously not the kinda person who can let things go easily because one would think the time between when you left the house after the argument and came back would have cooled down any flaring temper.

I just saw a crime documentary where man and fiancee fought in the morning around 7am, man left for work soon after. At work he told his best friend what happened and how aggressive his fiancee was, friend suggests that maybe man should spend the night in his place or at a hotel. man laughs him off and says he will be fine, she would have cooled down by the time he gets home.

He got home at 6 (Fiancee still not speaking to him), watched TV for a bit (thinking by the time he gets to bed, she would be asleep) went to bed at 9, Fiancee was pretending to be asleep and when she was sure he was sleeping she brought out the baseball bat she had hidden by her side of the bed and bashed his head in before taking a knife to his chest.

Dude bled to death. . .Over an argument that took place over 14hrs ago!!!!!!!!

Some people are just not alright upstairs, they revel in the hurt and anger and nothing you do can ever change that because they need professional help. All you can do is make sure they don't drag you into the dark abyss that is their crazy world.

Get out of the house first and foremost. . .then all working on the marriage tasks can be discussed.

Aww the man was a real gentleman,he was a real man...shebi na 6feet en dey do gentleman now? Not every woman or man walking on the street is right in the head..No gender has monopoly to abuse or violence.Let that sink into your skulls!

kensto: Am her husband

dnt touch her, jst leave her to eat the food for 1 month all alone. And also dnt share the bed with her, for as long as u can resist.

when your wife slaps you, u have less than 10 secs to reply her back with a hotter one and if she tries it again land one blow, its as simple as A B without the C.

Chai! Honestly,she no go try am,not cos she is aware dat I'm a trained boxer,but cos she knws what I'm capable of doing without raising my hand at all.
I will keep calm and carry on...
She 'll receive more than she bargained for. Shikenah!

DailyNews: Darling Lorreta, take this home: every successful man is a sexist and thinks the Adam's way!!! They are only feminist when they want to sell their brand, product or political campaign! Only failed men fantasize of marrying a woman richer than them.


Now don't get me wrong: I love seeing successful women, but I will never intentionally marry a woman richer than I am. If she becomes while we are married, fine...though she can't be smarter than I am in making money.

if my future wife ends up being a career lady, fine...her money is for she to take care of herself and her parents who trained her and if she wishes to contribute in taking care of the family, that's her decision and won't stop me from performing my desired duty- providing for my family.

But I repeat: I can't intentionally go for a rich lady just to marry a career or business woman, never...if she ends up one, I must strive to surpass or equal her before going to the altar.


Only failed men plan their future on a woman

Bros, I appreciate you are trying to be a real strong man. But marriage is not competition. You do not compete with your wife. You both try and strive to be the best you can be. If she ends up making more money than you do, it does not make you less of a man. It does not mean you are a failure. It just means both of you have become successful and you should both celebrate. Now if because she is richer than you she begins to disrespect you, then she is a bad woman and not you! Then she got a problem and not you.

I do not believe in suppressing my wife to make me feel like the head. I personally have invested heavily in my wife's career and if tomorrow she hits a billion dollars, I believe we will all be better for it. I do not encourage men to become gold-diggers but please remember you are not in competition with your wife.

DailyNews: Darling Lorreta, take this home: every successful man is a sexist and thinks the Adam's way!!! They are only feminist when they want to sell their brand, product or political campaign! Only failed men fantasize of marrying a woman richer than them.


Now don't get me wrong: I love seeing successful women, but I will never intentionally marry a woman richer than I am. If she becomes while we are married, fine...though she can't be smarter than I am in making money.

if my future wife ends up being a career lady, fine...her money is for she to take care of herself and her parents who trained her and if she wishes to contribute in taking care of the family, that's her decision and won't stop me from performing my desired duty- providing for my family.

But I repeat: I can't intentionally go for a rich lady just to marry a career or business woman, never...if she ends up one, I must strive to surpass or equal her before going to the altar.


Only failed men plan their future on a woman

dude your've made use of "my future wife" enough here to earn yourself a few Awwwws! I give you a dozen of them unbehalf of the blind single girls here who obviously can't spot a good man.

kshowhanif:
dnt touch her, jst leave her to eat the food for 1 month all alone. And also dnt share the bed with her, for as long as u can resist[/size][size=8pt].

I don't see how a man can make love to a woman that slapped him. That part highlighted at the end is one of the reasons why I do not like manipulative solutions to issues like these. His response needs to be direct and to the point. He really has to make sure she sees and understand that in his eyes she might as well be a wild animal. Not the woman he married. There is no other way. This takes crawling on your knees until he says he has forgiven. If a man slaps me I will make sure I dial 9-1 and keep the phone close by then give him the slap that will probably give my wrist whiplash and then dial the last 1 just in case he gets ready to slap me again

Nashville:

Bros, I appreciate you are trying to be a real strong man. But marriage is not competition. You do not compete with your wife. You both try and strive to be the best you can be. If she ends up making more money than you do, it does not make you less of a man. It does not mean you are a failure. It just means both of you have become successful and you should both celebrate. Now if because she is richer than you she begins to disrespect you, then she is a bad woman and not you! Then she got a problem and not you.

I do not believe in suppressing my wife to make me feel like the head. I personally have invested heavily in my wife's career and if tomorrow she hits a billion dollars, I believe we will all be better for it. I do not encourage men to become gold-diggers but please remember you are not in competition with your wife.

RESPECT!

This is how it should be!

Nashville:

Bros, I appreciate you are trying to be a real strong man. But marriage is not competition. You do not compete with your wife. You both try and strive to be the best you can be. If she ends up making more money than you do, it does not make you less of a man. It does not mean you are a failure. It just means both of you have become successful and you should both celebrate. Now if because she is richer than you she begins to disrespect you, then she is a bad woman and not you! Then she got a problem and not you.

I do not believe in suppressing my wife to make me feel like the head. I personally have invested heavily in my wife's career and if tomorrow she hits a billion dollars, I believe we will all be better for it. I do not encourage men to become gold-diggers but please remember you are not in competition with your wife.

In an ideal union this is how it should be..unfortunately a lot of couples allow pride to come into their union and it spirals south from there.

Difference isn't the same as inferior.
If any sex should be considered superior,it is the female sex. If you're a student of nature,and very ancient history(female figure worship and spiritualism) you'll understan why I said that
But really,no sex is superior
IMO

nutty_hnic:

Women are considered by MOST..... "people" (really trying to contain myself here) to be inferior because they are usually weaker physically, and they have evolutionarily had a different role, that requires and encourages different traits to men, like caringness and non-violence. In a competitive society, such qualities are often considered inferior to masculine qualities, like ambition, aggression... Because males and females have evolved differently, with different roles, they will always be different, and there will always be some kind of discrimination and inequality, as long as there is a difference between males and females. 

Nashville:

Bros, I appreciate you are trying to be a real strong man. But marriage is not competition. You do not compete with your wife. You both try and strive to be the best you can be. If she ends up making more money than you do, it does not make you less of a man. It does not mean you are a failure. It just means both of you have become successful and you should both celebrate. Now if because she is richer than you she begins to disrespect you, then she is a bad woman and not you! Then she got a problem and not you.

I do not believe in suppressing my wife to make me feel like the head. I personally have invested heavily in my wife's career and if tomorrow she hits a billion dollars, I believe we will all be better for it. I do not encourage men to become gold-diggers but please remember you are not in competition with your wife.

This is how it should be in a SANE world.

but only a few thinks straight these days

lorretta u: In any case don't accept any slap from any woman without giving her serious reproach(don't beat her up o)
Except if she's your mom. You know you can't yell at your mom and you can't slap her back too
Just the quiet "momma I don't like that" complain.

lol.i actually meant the o.p .He had the slap long time coming.it wasnt just because he deeped his hands in the pot.i actually wanted a better insight from you as a woman.

sarutobie:
In an ideal union this is how it should be..unfortunately a lot of couples allow pride to come into their union and it spirals south from there.

True, but for me I believe in doing the right thing to satisfy my conscience and God. If I have the resources to invest in my wife to make her career progress or make her more financially independent, should I know say because she may become proud I wouldnt? No, I would not. I would invest in her and if she becomes proud, I would feel justified in taking whatever action. But I will never supress my wife just to be the head. Never. Who knows what would happen tomorrow? If the man dies young and he has a wife who isnt working, what will happen to the family?

You cannot predict people and how they will react in future, but that does not mean you shouldnt do the right thing. I am not in competition with my wife, never. I want to be the best I can be and I want the same for her and thats it.

nutty_hnic:

Women are considered by MOST..... "people" (really trying to contain myself here) to be inferior because they are usually weaker physically, and they have evolutionarily had a different role, that requires and encourages different traits to men, like caringness and non-violence. In a competitive society, such qualities are often considered inferior to masculine qualities, like ambition, aggression... Because males and females have evolved differently, with different roles, they will always be different, and there will always be some kind of discrimination and inequality, as long as there is a difference between males and females. 

They're not just inferior physically, they're inferior physically, morally and mentally.

@bold, First of all, women are as ambitious as men, ambitiousness is not tied to gender, the reason you don't see women struggling to acheive as much as men is because majority of men do not want a woman that is more successful than them and because society teaches women to depend on men instead of struggling to make their own money.
Secondly, I don't understand how aggressiveness is considered to be a superior trait. It is baffling to me. The same aggressiveness is what leads many men to take unnecessarily violent actions and cause unnecessary harm to others, it is what led many kings in the past to declare unnecessary wars against other nations. How is a trait that causes harm to others considered to be a superior trait? I don't get it.
Aggression does not determine superiority for heaven's sake. We are humans and not animals and we should relate with one other in a civilized manner and not by employing aggression.

If you think the caringness and non violence women display is what makes them inferior to you then you are implying that psychopaths and sadists are by default the most superior beings on earths since they do not care about others and since they are violent towards others.



See what all these fake verses about wives submitting to husbands has caused?

Now people like this man think they are the best thing since sliced bread while females are nothing but mentally, morally and physically inferior nobodies. Even the uneducated truck pushers on the road think they are superior to all the women on earth because they have p£nises.

Omg' I won't even dare this with my fiance..I won't even dream of it....yes shout back ,feign a wrestle buh not a point blank slap...my own don finish be that..

nna_bu_ike:

No you did not really have a point. Just a collection of daydreams.



I am happy that you did not insult me by assuming that you could change my perspective. Only women and weak "men" benefit from such. We all are exposed to more or less the same stimuli in this world. Those like me understand the nature of things as they are and work with it, those like you indulge in pipe dreams and romance.



Thank you for sparing us the labours.



Rest assured that I am enjoying every nanosecond of it. In fact I notice that I influence those around me(even though I am a notoriously quiet guy). And indeed I have several women. Most real women do not care much for that rubbish that you are campaigning about. An accomplished man that can provide is all they are really interested in, and usually problems in marriages come about when there is no man in the family, given my previous qualification of "man".

if I ask you to give me one unarguable reason why women are inferior to men,you're going to come up with certified nonsense. So I won't bother.let me focus my words on people like dailynews who at least has a percieved reason for what he's saying.in your opinion,a real woman is the one who's only interested in an accomplished man who can pay her bills?
somebody(anybody) help this dude pls

Like I said I'm done with you,I didn't expect you to quote me again.if you do again,I'm gon ignore you. Thank you



@Dailynews,I hope you understand that money doesnt equate to success.
If so we'd be callling yahoo boys , drug dealers and high way robbers successful men.
Success has more to do with satisfaction and covered milestones than how much you've made.
So saying that a con man who has amassed billions by fraud is more successful than a Ph.d holder who's married to a medical doctor (and both of them share the family expenses) is wrong. Success isn't solely identified by money.

lorretta u: Difference isn't the same as inferior.
If any sex should be considered superior,it is the female sex. If you're a student of nature,and very ancient history(female figure worship and spiritualism) you'll understan why I said that
But really,no sex is superior
IMO

lol, mother goddess and all....am a realist

OK. As an Irishman I could not retaliate and slap back. A real man would not do that.

If this is a regular thing then leave her! She is abusive!

If it is a first or an isolated incident then stay calm and walk away. You can quietly let your displeasure and unhappiness be felt.

I did this with a gf once who slapped me. I didn't mind the slap but she 'yabbed' on a lot afterwards. I said very little. Was respectful and left her home but said little about calling her or when we would meet again. I heard nothing for two day then she started calling. I answered the third call and was very distant and reserved not mentioning meeting again or anything. Soon she was crying and apologising and beggining. She knew she had gone too far!

So ko si wahalla!

kensto: I was having an argument with my wife over an issue which she was at fault. I angryly left the house to cool temper. I later came back and asked for my food ,she ignored me. I went to the kitchen to take my food, opened the pot to take the food. She came from where she was staying walked to the kitchen and closed the pot and then slapped me saying "how dare you touch my pot". I just stood there for some minutes wondering what i would do to her. Please tell me what to do.

Da fuq? Where do all these villagers come from? That is absolutely unacceptable, re*tarded and plain crass. What should you do now? Whatever you must to ensure it never happens again. If it has happened before, it's time to take decisive action.

De Beauvoir:

@bold, First of all, women are as ambitious as men, ambitiousness is not tied to gender, the reason you don't see women struggling to acheive as much as men is because majority of men do not want a woman that is more successful than them and because society teaches women to depend on men instead of struggling to make their own money.
Secondly, I don't understand how aggressiveness is considered to be a superior trait. It is baffling to me. The same aggressiveness is what leads many men to take unnecessarily violent actions and cause unnecessary harm to others, it is what led many kings in the past to declare unnecessary wars against other nations. How is a trait that causes harm to others considered to be a superior trait? I don't get it.
Aggression does not determine superiority for heaven's sake. We are humans and not animals and we should relate with one other in a civilized manner and not by employing aggression.

If you think the caringness and non violence women display is what makes them inferior to you then you are implying that psychopaths and sadists are by default the most superior beings on earths since they do not care about others and since they are violent towards others.



See what all these fake verses about wives submitting to husbands has caused?

Now people like this man think they are the best thing since sliced bread while females are nothing but mentally, morally and physically inferior nobodies. Even the uneducated truck pushers on the road think they are superior to all the women on earth they have p£nises.

lol, dont get me wrong Woman! i tried to explain myself clearer...you really had to hammer on the aggression part which of cousrse is typical of men and had to "monsterise me" as one who obssessisively feels women are OUTRIGHT inferior and as such are no good to society dan reproducing.

thats not my point dear, am explaining from a realistic and historical point of view. .


I wouldn't say that women were 'inferior' (unless I was deliberately trying to piss people off which was misunderstood), but I think another reason i why it is the way IT IS is due to the self-absorbtion of many women.Men have typically been in the position where they must woo women by providing shelter, wealth, food, status, and everything else.

I think the cause for MOST MEN concern about women not being upto men arises from the false heterosexual notion of equality. When women and men are brought togther to share the same social space --- then women will automatically become a secondary being, becuase she is not physically as powerful as the man

. This is simply because MOST women are uncreative, afraid of conflict and skeptical of change. Obviously they would not have suffered such low status throughout the centuries if they had not deserved to. So the question is why? Is it genetic? Is it learned? Is it metaphysical? is it me hating on the opposite sex?

its reality....

bukatyne:

I really do not have anything to prove to you babe

If you do not like my opinions, jump into the ocean or hug a wet transformer

Even when posters seem to have a 'certain' mindset, I still judge them per posts

For God's sake, please don't quote me if you do not have anything reasonable to say. If you want to gather likes or whatever, find another avenue to do so.

Thanks

Lol @ gather likes!

Nashville:

Bros, I appreciate you are trying to be a real strong man. But marriage is not competition. You do not compete with your wife. You both try and strive to be the best you can be. If she ends up making more money than you do, it does not make you less of a man. It does not mean you are a failure. It just means both of you have become successful and you should both celebrate. Now if because she is richer than you she begins to disrespect you, then she is a bad woman and not you! Then she got a problem and not you.

I do not believe in suppressing my wife to make me feel like the head. I personally have invested heavily in my wife's career and if tomorrow she hits a billion dollars, I believe we will all be better for it. I do not encourage men to become gold-diggers but please remember you are not in competition with your wife.

Bros, you know dey disappoint

I wonder what Dailynews will do if he was Akunyili's or Okonjo's husband; na suicide be that.

Some views to marriage are scary

If she slaps u,
Just pretend to cry
She will definitely feel bad..

nutty_hnic:
. This is simply because MOST women are uncreative, afraid of conflict and skeptical of change. Obviously they would not have suffered such low status throughout the centuries if they had not deserved to. So the question is why? Is it genetic? Is it learned? Is it metaphysical? is it me hating on the opposite sex?

its reality....

No. It's conditioning.

devour129: slap her back

And it wouldn't be a second too soon! If a grown ass adult goes about initiating physical confrontations, then they should be well prepared for whatever may come of it. Simple!

De Beauvoir:

No. It's conditioning.

So you are saying its possible to PSYCHOLOGICALLY alter the way things are to bring about a change in the mind of both sexes to such effect that WOMEN also be PERCEIVED as being able to carry out the same functions as MEN... everything, mentally, physcally nd all?

nutty_hnic::

. This is simply because MOST women are uncreative, afraid of conflict and skeptical of change. Obviously they would not have suffered such low status throughout the centuries if they had not deserved to. So the question is why? Is it genetic? Is it learned? Is it metaphysical? is it me hating on the opposite sex?

Lifestyles in the past made it necessary for women to stay home and depend on men, there was the high rate of infant mortality, the absence of machines that take up physically demanding tasks and so men had to do much of the physical work that was required back then like hunting, farming and defence and so they were mostly providers while women were mostly dependent on them, as a result of this, it was only fair for the men who provided everything for the household to be the head and ruler since the woman depended on him.

These days women work and also contribute financially to the family. They are not inferior to men.

bukatyne:

Bros, you know dey disappoint

I wonder what Dailynews will do if he was Akunyili's or Okonjo's husband; na suicide be that.

Some views to marriage are scary

Thats the truth. So if the guy marry Akunyili, he would probably be very sad rather than be proud of his wife. Now when you see some women believe it is ok to be lazy and not aspire to be much you can understand. Its just because we have lots of men who prefer the lazy type of girls to women who want to achieve something.

I wouldnt share my story cos it may sound like I am gloating but the truth is that you need to see my wife's CV. Alot the stuff there are directly from me or my contacts. I am not worried if she becomes proud tomorrow - I can always marry another wife